Chapter 36: Goddess gone
Then, he was not called Daniel. He was not called by anything unique. He had a number like everyone else does, each time two of them will be awakened and trained to do the one thing and one thing only. The target is one and the same, it has never changed and never will change. From the moment he was made he had the enemy's name imprinted in his head.
Athrun Zala.
Then, his partner was six. Six was chosen to go first in a simple game of Rock-paper-scissors, he was accelerated along. Daniel, then known as Five was trained in the parallel fashion; combat, artillery and mobile suit simulator but he will never be as strong and tall as six due to growth stimulation. Six finished his training and was sent out into the actual mission, he chose the alias 'Light'. It was for convenience sake, if nothing else. Before he departed, he turned to five and gave him a hug.
"My brother. If I win, hell will end."
Five did not know the significance of it then, but the hug was warm, so he held six back and nodded. Six is not going out there alone, partners are linked up by a mental bridge, it allows one to learn from the other, in case the first of the pair failed. Five tapped his own temple to indicate the link.
"Your eyes are my eyes and your ears, my ears."
Five saw through his eyes and felt through his heart. Six did not fail, he had found redemption. His life was spared by the very one he had sought to murder, he propagated the mercy. When Six died, he was contented; if not happy. The mental link was mercilessly severed, the impact of death left Five with a severe migraine and he vomited for days, when he woke up Dr Saspuri told him that he was the first of the leftover pairs who survived, it was not supposed to happen.
Dr Saspuri just left them in the lurch one day and Zaft soldiers overran the place.
Five thought it was the end, his life will end, but the Zaft soldiers did nothing of that sort, in fact, they brought to life all of his other brothers, seven and eight and nine and ten and so on; all who were fully formed. They fed them and trained them, Five concealed what he know, acting like a newborn as with all his brothers. It was easy and Five was contented to let them do what they wish. They then boarded ships that flew into outer space and swim through liquid stardust, he was told the little lights were suns, with their own planets, their own lifeforms, their own self-sustainable ecosystems where creatures which were brown and blue and pink roamed. Creatures that croaked and mooed and meowed and barked, creature that swam and flew or do both. The ship he was on had a library with a wealth of information, he explored those hungrily, willing to devour as much as he could.
Five had been told he was created, cloned from a perfect being, but what of these creatures, were they created too? Who has a brain so large that he could think of every perceivable permutation of creatures big and small ever going to be conceived by the imagination? A heart so big that he would make them and give heed to their needs daily? Hands so big that it will mould little planets and suns and hold it at the palm of his hands. Five concluded that there must be something bigger than all these. For the first time, his eyes were opened to the vastness of the world, and he was thankful to the Zaft soldiers who brought him to see the world beyond the little lab in which he grew.
For the first time in his life, he could actually conscious of an 'I'. He felt so small and insignificant in the face of the sprawling vastness of creation, he wondered if there was any place on this universe which he will fit, he wondered if he can really be free to find that place just as Six had done. Where in the tapestry fabrication by the Almighty will he find the little spot meant just for the little jigsaw piece like him?
Zaft ordered their deaths when the ships are about to blow. Five's first response was "No." He said it aloud, it caused alarm in immediate vicinity. The soldier who gave them the order looked distraught and uncomfortable all of a sudden. A woman, a high-ranking officer in grey who was apparently named after something that lives under the sea and cleans the water, sighed.
"These are kids, we knew that, soldier. You knew that, yet we dragged them out here. There's no going back. Do as you are told." She turned to Five, "If you don't want to, I won't force you. You're obviously different from the rest."
Five gazed into the blank faces of his brothers, they may have time to develop actual intelligence and hence judgement, but not emotions. They were created to be mass-produced soldiers. Five had tried to link with the rest when they awoke, but it was too hard to gaze for too long into a mind void of anything at all and it got so boring he stopped trying.
"I don't want to…!" He half-yelled, at that moment the emotions overpowering, surged and threatened to burst out of him, there was too much wonder about this world, he was not ready to die without seeing it. "I'm not going to die!" He declared, he wanted to run, to escape but was unsure of where to.
His brothers looked at him nonchalantly, as if mocking his 'I', mocking his decision, the first he made in his life. He wiped the tears of frustration from his eyes as Coral gestured for him to come, but as he turned to leave, Eight stopped him.
Eight shrouded him in a hug, then whispered, "Only you alone can be free."
Five gasped softly, sensing the thoughts of his brother overwhelm him by physical and emotional proximity. One by one, his brothers came and hugged him and said their farewells, Five was blown away as he hugged each of them back each tighter than the last. He heard the unspoken, they had become aware of existence, of life, of death; of fear…He sensed the consensus of his brothers on the other ships, he heard their voices ringing in his head.
"Live, Five….Live."
They ringed themselves around the bombs willingly, linking hands and holding each other's shoulders. Their voices rang on and on until all at once, their lives were snuffed out. Five heard and felt his brothers die, he felt vividly the pain as skin and flesh were disintegrated and seared right off their faces, as the liquid was boiled out of their eyeballs. There was a terribly loud sound, an unbearable, blaring pain that is so horrible that it cannot be described in words. At that time he was huddling in some corner, willing to stop feeling. It was too much to feel at once, he was not sure of what happened, but he collapsed.
The next few days were spent disoriented and between fits of seizures, he was not sure of whether he was dead or alive. He finally woke up a week later, hooked up to a ventilator. He was so weak he could not sit up, his speech had all but abandoned him even after they took him off the breathing machine; but he was determined to do what his brothers had told him to do.
Five will survive.
When he could walk. He was taken to the PLANTs military headquarters, where the army leaders debated his fate, apparently, he was a clone of a perfect soldier who may become a threat to Zaft if his skills blossomed. There was one original now, the fellow is apparently in Orb. Some proposed to maim him, others, to deport him or to send him back into cryo. Lunamaria-the lady in white with a moon related name- and Coral for some reason, defended him, saying that he should be allowed to grow up like a normal child. Five had no idea what normality meant, but he was tired of people trying to decide stuff for him. He was not going to do as they say, if the results were unfavourable, he will kill everyone there and move on; he was skilled and smart enough, he was disciplined. He will survive, it was simple as that...
It was decided that his foster parent be one of the Supreme councillors, the leaders of PLANTs, that way they could keep him in line. Five went with the arrangement knowing that he can still kill the adoptive parent should he should prove to be nasty, he was betrayed by Dr Sas, then betrayed by Zaft, he was convinced that all adults are out to make use of him…If they betrayed him, he can always betray them back.
Yzak was not what he expected.
He was obviously Coordinator by each strand of his silver hair and the gradient of his blue-violet eyes, but they were haunted and tired, they spoke of loss and unbearable pain. Yzak did not smile, he listened, he accepted and he did what was to be done. Five had thought it will be some old man like the military leaders who will talk in big and boisterous words, but Yzak hardly talked and appeared not so much older than himself, when he does, he changes the words he use in mid-sentence to make them simpler. Even though he was not that old, his eyes were infinitely sad and hence old-looking. When Yzak was alone and not talking, he would gaze at a photograph of a woman who is big around the middle, with kind eyes. Five also knew then that he had no need to kill this one, not yet anyway. He had hoped the big hug he gave Yzak on day one will suffice as a message of amicability.
Yzak gave him a name, a school to go to. Daniel was given a room to himself, toys, things that intrigued him. He was given a chance to make friends and he got to try the amazing macadamia nut ice cream, the large teddy had fur so soft. He was allowed to indulge in them, other than school, Yzak let him make decisions he could choose what he want to do at what time and read the things he want to. Yzak made no seeming effort to control intelligence. At first Daniel thought it was sloppy, later he realized Yzak actually trusted him to not do silly things with the information. There was really no point in antagonizing Yzak, Daniel knew he did not want him for an enemy, not when this man holds the highest office in the country, albeit temporarily.
Daniel was cautious but glad about receiving these gifts, he took nothing for granted, knowing that there was no free lunch in this world. Daniel knew that whatever Yzak gave, someday, he will take it all back. Daniel will be waiting for the day, for now, he will read the books, talk to the friends, eat the wonderful ice-cream...He read somewhere that people who are born have fathers and mothers. Yzak was playing the role of his father, Daniel thought that did not feel quite right, there's supposed to be a good 30 years between generations so Yzak's way too young to be his father.
It was the first thunderstorm that really caused him to reconsider the father part. The thunder boomed across the sky, he nearly jumped out of his skin, then a second one caused him to dive for cover. He huddled pathetically under the blanket, covering his ears hoping to muffle the sound. The third sent him waving his fist in vain at the sky. It was then Yzak came, gave an incredibly long sigh. Then brought him to his room, Yzak buried Daniel under a bunch of pillows, shut the doors and windows and turned on classical music. The terrible sound became more bearable, and Daniel peeked out from under the pillows. Yzak unearthed him, then laid the thick blanket over them both, tucking him in. He then fell asleep with one hand resting protectively on Daniel shoulder.
Daniel gazed at Yzak gratefully for a time, then held on to Yzak's warm hand and drifted off to sleep himself…Whenever there was a thunderstorm, he instinctively went to Yzak, somehow in Yzak's presence, the storm became bearable.
Apparently, it was also the role of a father to teach and discipline, the first time Yzak disciplined him was after the fight. At school, he told no one of this adoptive parentage, but when several kids were discussing politics, Daniel's ears perked up and he listened in as someone mentioned 'Yzak Jule'. One person in particular, Stilson, was telling awful lies. He said that Yzak was a bad person, that he was a fear-mongering and power-hungry and egoistic man, Daniel did not even understand half the big words, but he knew they were bad, he was so angry that he could barely remember what happened, he had wanted to kill Stilson. By the time he came to his senses, he had beaten up all the boys. It was also the first time he felt such a terrible emotion he could not control, it was as if there was a demon in him. Why was he angry? Words are empty and should mean nothing to him...
He could not stop the principal from calling Yzak, Daniel felt so guilty- not for beating up the boys, that felt good. He knew that Yzak was very busy and had a thousand and one people telling him what to do, time and sleep were both utterly precious and Daniel was adding to his workload. Fear gripped Daniel's heart as he realized at any point in time if Yzak decided it was too much trouble and not turn up, or denounced the adoption, there was absolutely nothing he can do.
He was surprised at how much that mattered to him…it was not the room, the information, nor the teddy bear or the ice-cream. It was Yzak himself, really. Daniel realized he had gotten so used to Yzak's presence that he had taken him for granted. But really, all of it was a perfect dream, a fantasy that might be destroyed any time.
Yzak came, reprimanded him, then took him out for nuggets. Daniel felt incredibly glad and grateful that Yzak actually came back for him that he broke out in tears. As he ate the nuggets, he looked at Yzak dipping the nugget in curry sauce before offering it to him. The proportion of the sauce to nugget was perfect, the sweet, spicy sensation on his tongue was so pleasurable. Daniel purposed to himself that he intended to keep his promise, to obey.
He knew he should not test Yzak's patience. He began thinking of other ways to sort out the idiot at school. There are a couple of ways to shut someone up. One is bribery, Daniel did not want to offer any of his books or toys, that was too kind. The second is by power, he could tell Stilson-and probably the whole world-that his adoptive father is Yzak Jule and threaten to sue him if he told any more lies. But then security will become a concern, not just his own. The last was by winning so completely that the defeated will never dare to challenge you again. That's what he proceeded to do, the results were better than he expected. He excelled, he pushed himself. People around him started to notice him, the weak crowd around the strong, he learned to make people notice him. The other kids began grouping around him, asking for homework to copy, for advice, for a chance to hang out. His gang became bigger than Stilson's.
Stilson then started threatening them, the cowardly ones fell away, the ones left is the most loyal. Daniel than issued a challenge, the race on sports day. The agreement is that if Daniel won, he will stop harassing Daniel's friends.
When Dr Sas called Yzak, Daniel was alert in an instant, he knew that Yzak was being threatened and blackmailed, when he was told to leave, Daniel did not want to. He wanted to yell at Yzak, "I can defend myself, I can protect you, I am a trained soldier!", but could not bring himself to say it as he remembered what Yzak whispered on the night before he had to leave.
Yzak was trying to protect him…. fathers do that, even if it hurts themselves.
For the first time in his life, Daniel cried at the realization. His prayers were answered without him knowing, Yzak had never tried to make use of him. In the midst of his own trials and sorrows, Yzak had built a home to shelter him; shield him and protect him from storms.
He wanted to return to Yzak's side, he wanted to make him proud, then maybe someday he will allow him to be a Jule as well…
He was at Cagalli's side in the hospital when he heard the evening news that the adults would not tell him. It was after the assassin episode and Daniel had been deposited with Cagalli by sister Shiho, she was busy and Yzak hospitalized. Daniel studied the way the kidnap was carried out, he guessed Dr Sas has something to do with it, he wondered if there was anything he could have done.
Also apparently, Yzak's condition was deteriorating, the mere possibility that Yzak was dying scared the wits out of Daniel. The thought of facing the world alone was too much to bear. What was normality before had been driven away by the presence of a family. Yzak is his family...
He begged Cagalli to take him to that hospital, but was told that children cannot enter. He wondered if he could find the drug they used for acceleration, then he can get in. Cagalli sat him down and held him, "Don't panic, I know you are worried for Yzak, I called Dearka already."
"What did Dearka say?" He cried, heart in mouth.
"The doctors are trying their best to save him." She replied evenly.
"Is he going to die?!" Daniel cried, panicking again. "Why can't I go see him?!"
Cagalli said calmly. "Children may get sick from bugs there that won't affect adults, he would not want you to risk yourself like that."
That sounded fair enough, though it did not put Daniel at ease. His lips were quivering. Cagalli looked pensive for a moment, then offered, "I know a friend, she's nice, she runs a place that have lots of little kids who have lost their parents. I'm sure we can arrange something for you if needed..."
Daniel was furious and speechless, he withdrew from Cagalli and interrupted her. "What do you mean by that?!" Before he knew it he had exploded at her, he bellowed at the top of his lungs, screaming in her face. "All my life I have had IDIOTIC ADULTS trying to tell me how to live my life! THEY DON'T CARE, THEY JUST WANT TO CONTROL ME! THEN…!" He bit his lip as he dissolved into tears, they came uncontrollably, helplessly, relentlessly.
"…Then Yzak came, he…gave and gave and gave…and never asked me for anything in return…" he whimpered, he wiped at his cheeks. "If Yzak…is not here…I'd be alone again..."
Cagalli's lips came apart and she looked at him in surprise. She remained like that for a while.
'They were wrong about you…I was wrong about him…" She marvelled eventually. Daniel did not know what she was talking about, but she gestured for him to approach her, he did and she held all of him gently.
She was so soft and warm, like the big teddy bear. She stroked his hair, "You like Yzak a lot, huh?"
"…What is 'like'?" He questioned.
She chewed her lip, a pregnant pause ensued, she tapped on his chest, the area right over his heart. "'Like' is here. When he's around, you feel safe. When he's not, it's a little lonely. You don't want him to be angry at you, you want to see him smile. That's 'like'."
Daniel considered the information, it were a revelation to him. One hand came over his own beating heart in consideration. If it were all true, then Cagalli will be a prophet. He nodded gingerly, "if it's all that…yes, I like Yzak." His heart beat a little faster, felt a little warmer as he said it, as if it was agreeing with him.
She smiled, "Yzak likes you too, he takes care of you. So the adoption was not a farce…Yzak treats you like family."
Daniel was a little dejected at that, there are evidences that pointed to the contrary. "…He doesn't want me to be a Jule…"
"You don't have to be family in name, because you already are. I can think of a thousand reasons why he wants to do that to keep you safe." Athrun pointed out as he sat up slowly, both of them jumped a little. Cagalli pulled away and looked at Athrun tenderly and helped him up. She berated him, "Sneaky…as usual…How long have you been awake?" Cagalli asked.
"Since I heard this kid shouting at you." Athrun replied, his gazed turned to train on Daniel. There was no anger nor rebuke, he gave a somewhat gentle look.
Athrun Zala was nothing like what was said in the instruction manuals, Daniel had not had a chance to see him in action partly due to the fact that he had been physically wounded. But there were instances where he caught falling vases for example and his reflexes were remarkably fast, it appeared as only a blur to Daniel. Daniel was wary of him but found no other reason to antagonize him. Offending Cagalli now was also definitely not a good idea...
"Daniel." Athrun called, summoning him. Daniel walked forward as Athrun patted him on the head kindly, it was an affectionate gesture and Daniel gulped in surprise as he felt his heart racing, he clenched one fist over his heart. The residual emotions from Six were spilling over and he could not understand it, it was as if Six liked…
That's it! Daniel suddenly understood, Six liked Athrun.
"Who is Six?" Athrun asked in surprise, he traced the tears from Daniel's cheek, he felt the warm moisture glide across his skin. Daniel was taken aback, he did not even know when he had shed tears, the tears were not his.
"Six is my…" He fumbled for a word, he had not come across a word that could describe the relationship between the paired clones. Then it came to him.
"…Twin, yes twins…His chosen name was 'Light'."
Athrun's lips parted, but he did not make a sound, he let out a breath as if he had been physically hit.
"Athrun...?" Daniel asked.
"But…but I couldn't save him…" Athrun choked up, a hand over his mouth as he took shuddering breaths. Daniel cannot understand why Athrun was upset.
"But you did save him…" He implored quietly, touching Athrun's shoulder, gingerly, he laid one full palm over Athrun's chest the same way Cagalli had done. "You save his here... Mr…erm, Athrun…We were bred soldiers, clones of the original, we are created only to fight you. We were puppets on strings, but Six was free, you gave him his freedom. He exercised it, you are living proof of that freedom…"
Athrun gazed at him, eyes wide, then he nodded once in acknowledgement. Then whispered, "Yzak probably never told you, but he lost his family…both his wife and unborn child within the last year."
Daniel was terrified of losing Yzak, he cannot imagine how terrible it must have been to lose two members of your family. No wonder Yzak looked so burdened and sorrowful, Daniel sat closer to Athrun, waiting for him to go on.
"He and Sedna has decided the name of their child in advance, they knew they will have a little boy. He gave you the name of that child, don't you see?" Athrun touched his head, "…They had wanted to name their child 'Daniel'."
Daniel felt the breath being wrestled from him, his heart pumped faster in delight and tears brimmed in his eyes and overflowed. He could barely contain himself.
"When I heard that Yzak adopted a boy and that boy was named Daniel, it clicked. You are like the unborn son he never knew, I've waiting to meet you. The one you call 'original' is my best friend, his name is Kira, Kira Yamato." He gestured at Cagalli, "She's Kira's sister."
Daniel widened his eyes at the revelation, he was told that Athrun had fought the original in a battle to the death and it ended as a draw. They are best friends...Yzak too, had to hurt his friend.
"Why would you hurt your friend…?" Daniel asked quietly, he wanted to understand.
Athrun's expression was indescribable. "Because… he killed my friend."
"And…why did he kill your friend?"
"...I killed his friend."
"This will never end, will it?" He asked.
Cagalli looked at him in an almost proud way, "Such wisdom, coming from someone so young. Yes, that will never end."
In that instant Daniel realized that he actually understood, he did not know if Dr Sas was friend or foe, but if he hurts Yzak. Daniel will hunt down Dr Sas and destroy him…
Ooo
Daniel looked as Shiho left the ward, she touched his head, then whispered, "Your turn."
Daniel then he tottered up to Yzak and looked at him for some time. Yzak was barely awake, he was sitting up in a large chair looking evidently worn-out, he gazed at Daniel listlessly, his skin was pale and his breathing laboured. At least… he did not die, he was alive, thank goodness...
Yzak asked tentatively, "Daniel…? What's… the matter?" He looked as if he wanted to bring his hand to pat Daniel's head, but could not find the strength to do so.
Daniel hesitated, then lowered himself to Yzak's side and scooted his head beneath the hand, he bit his lip at how cold Yzak's hand was, Yzak tousled his hair a little and Daniel sighed. He knelt where he was, his chin on the armrest, he was simply savouring the weight of Yzak's hand on his head.
Disobedient tears began to roll down his cheeks.
"Daniel?" Yzak rasped in alarm. "Are you hurt…?"
"No, I am fine." He replied, wiping at his face, then said sincerely. "I am just...happy you are alive…Waaahhhhhhhhhh~!" Against his better judgement, he broke into an all-out wail, he cried his heart out. Yzak's hand moved from his hand to his shoulders, comforting him. He crawled in and huddled with Yzak, wanting to be nearer. He was careful to not touch any of the wires and stay at Yzak's uninjured side, he curled up into a ball to take up as little space as possible. Both of Yzak's arms came and wrap around him, rubbing his shoulder and back.
"Don't die, please don't die!" He demanded brokenly, adhering to Yzak, "Don't leave me…"
"Okay..." Yzak replied.
"I will protect you from now on." He declared resolutely, looking Yzak in the eye. "I will."
Yzak gazed at him in bemusement, "Now where did that come from…?"
ooo
Athrun checked on Cagalli the next morning, her fever had broken, he sighed in relief. It was a Sunday, he had taken Suki and Melody out for a walk, bathed them both and made breakfast for them all-the cooks were not very happy- and it was only 9.30am. He wondered if he should let Cagalli sleep in, but it was a beautiful day and he wanted to ask her if she would like to go out. He stroked her hair gently, she stirred beneath his touch, curling towards him but did not wake.
He was going to ask her on a date…
That thought alone caused his heart to hammer against his chest, he tried to rationalize it, "Come on, you can't really date her, she's your wife, moron, remember? But can you…?"
With those thoughts swirling in his head as he decided to wait for another half hour, he did not realize that there was someone in the living room until the said someone was giving him a bear hug. His instinct flared to life as he realize the person was a man who was slightly taller than himself, he yanked himself out of the embrace, grabbed the person's hand and executed a shoulder toss before pinning the intruder to the ground.
"Who are you and how did you get in?!" He demanded aggressively as he grabbed a letter opener and pressed it threateningly against the person's back.
"Ou Ou Ou!" The man cried out in a benign voice, "Oh dear, Sir Zala, why so physical today?"
"Ah!" Kira exclaimed as he came out to check out the noise, "Aaron! Why…? Athrun?!"
Athrun's gaze flitted between Kira and the intruder. "Do you know him?" Athrun demanded hesitantly.
"Yeah, let go…! He's Cagalli's stylist."
"Oh." Athrun released the man's hands in embarrassment. He was still doubtful about the man's intentions and the reason for trying to give him a hug when they are both men.
The moment he released his prisoner, Aaron sprang up and gave him an impassioned hug as he just stood there transfixed on the spot, unsure of whether Cagalli will get angry if he retaliated.
"Oh dear, they said you hurt you head, you don't remember me? How dare these criminals leave a scar on your face?" Aaron gasped as he fingered the bandages, Athrun shied away from the contact. Aaron then proceeded to kiss both sides of his cheeks, and before Athrun could fight back he had pulled away and it gave Athrun a chance to properly look at him. Aaron was a thirty-odd-year-old man, tall, long legs in a bespoke purple suit. He had black hair streaked with violet and was wearing a little eyeliner. His eyes were crimson and the rest of his features were attractive and androgynous.
Suddenly Aaron smiled sincerely, he dropped his boisterous act and whispered to Athrun. "You're so brave, Sir Zala, gallant with a capital G. Thank you for saving dearie Cagalli back then."
Athrun did not know how to respond, he nodded slightly in response, deciding that Aaron was probably not a threat. He also wondered what exactly is his rank in the scheme of things, the stylist deferred to him as 'Sir Zala', had he been knighted somewhere?
"Right, to business my dear Regent!" Aaron pulled Athrun's wrist and he had no choice but to be led along as Aaron asked Kira, where can I find some privacy in this drearily sun-shinee place? Dear General you are looking dashing!" He threatened to kiss Kira as well but Kira warded him off playfully.
"This way, you're kidding, I haven't slept well in days." Athrun gazed at Kira, 'General' meant that Kira belonged to an army now, Kira did not tell him, for a moment a fleeting worry assaulted him. Athrun wondered if that will make them enemies ever again… It pained him, more than words can say, if he ever had to fight Kira…
"Comes as a package, congratulations on your upgrade in status."
"Thanks…You need to measure him again? I know you say it's because he's finally putting on some weight, but sometimes I think you do it on purpose."
"Everything I do is for a great purpose." Aaron declared dramatically, "Beside, every time he lands up in hospital he comes back a little scrawnier. How can I be sure?"
Kira nodded a little, his lips pressed together in mirth.
The banter made Athrun deduce that the two knew each other well, Kira led them to an empty guest room. "Aren't you…looking for Cagalli…?" He asked hesitantly.
"Oh, I am done with missus's Coronation gown. It's you who has been in hospital till now."
"I thought the coronation is on the same day as the wedding…?"
"It was." Aaron corrected, pursing his lips, "But after the assassins came and ruined everything, the emirs decided to postpone the coronation, it has to be done for formality sake, you know, for the people to see. It will be in two days' time. So, more work for me. I am preparing for a fashion show next week too and I hope to get a head-start on you."
Two days later was the same day Athrun had promised a reply to Cagalli, he wondered if it were a coincidence. Also, he has no role in the coronation, so what is Aaron looking for him for…?
"So what has it got to do with me…ya…!" Athrun exclaimed as Aaron suddenly pulled him atop a low stool, he was surprisingly strong. "Same drill, arms out."
Aaron's expert, manicured hands lingered longer than they ought to on Athrun's person, and when he caught Athrun looking, he looked right back with a seductive smile. Athrun really wanted to punch the living daylights out of this guy, but could only endure; the head stylist of the queen dying of mysterious causes would surely make headlines. He was starting to feel a little creeped out as he felt goose bumps rise on his back, he wondered if Kira will rescue him in a politically correct fashion if he asked.
Kira was standing at one corner of the room observing his reaction and seemingly hiding his laugh, Athrun realized he would have no help from there. Kira actually enjoyed watching his discomfort as Aaron's deliberate 'measuring' steadily moved from his neck, his arms, shoulders, chest, waist, hip…
"Aaron…?" Cagalli's voice sounded as she knocked and came in, Athrun heaved an internal sigh of relief at the impending salvation. Aaron immediately turned, exclaiming "Ma ma mia, popsicles~!" and gave Cagalli a hug, Athrun watched on in disbelief-and rage-as Aaron gave Cagalli a kiss on both her cheeks. Athrun bit back his protests as Cagalli hugged Aaron back warmly and unguardedly. He did not realize he was clenching his fists, he had no right to be upset if Cagalli was okay with it. Also, it seemed like just a customary greeting to Aaron.
In a moment of afterthought, he wondered why he was upset...
"You didn't tell me you were coming~!" Cagalli said candidly as she pulled away.
"Duty calls, I have two more days to rush out the uniform for Sir Zala here. He's your knight after all, you two will look so absolutely stunning, it will dim the lights of the brightest stars and cause them to hide in shame, I promise."
Cagalli shrugged, then spared a glance at Athrun, she asked with a bemused look, "Aaron, what were you doing with Athrun today? He looks like he's ready to beat you up."
Athrun swallowed guiltily, still unused to being mind-read.
Aaron laughed throatily, "Declaring my love, as usual."
Athrun gulped as he suddenly understood, Aaron was unabashedly checking him out and both Kira and Cagalli knew…
"He's off-limits. You know that!" Cagalli set her lip, there was an edge to her voice now. Aaron answered with a smile, he picked up and kissed the back of Cagalli's hand, "Why? Can't you share, my lady?"
"Nope, he is mine." Cagalli replied without hesitation.
For some strange reason, Athrun felt his heart give a wild leap at Cagalli's declaration. In that instant he was not sure whether to laugh, cry or hide himself. That confidence that she is emitting is incredibly sexy. He was quite oblivious to it as they joked and laughed after that and Cagalli escorted Aaron off and Kira went back to the room. He really prayed he did not hear wrongly and wondered if Cagalli will repeat herself if he asked…
When it was all quiet again and Aaron had gone, Cagalli turned to him and gave a hearty smile, "That was entertaining."
He was unsure of whether to agree or not, he knew that the joke was not quite directed at Aaron...
"Don't worry about it, Aaron only likes men."
Again, Athrun was aware that Cagalli was teasing him, but he could not bring himself to be angry. He only gave a helpless and slightly self-deprecating sigh.
Cagalli came right in front of him, grinning, "Well, if this makes you feel better." She tiptoed and kissed him on both cheeks, this time Athrun felt his face burn...
"I've erased all marks of Aaron, you're now officially cleansed." She declared like a priest as she pretended to sprinkle non-existent holy water all over him. That earned a laugh from him, this time she laughed with him, taking his hands.
"Let's go out, ne? It's such a beautiful day, there's more stuff I wanna show you. Let's leave the kids behind and be selfish for a couple of hours."
Athrun nodded in agreement, "Are you feeling better?" He was a little miffed but relieved that he need not pop the question after all, Cagalli was actually dating him. Maybe the mind-reading was not such a bad thing...
"After your awesome porridge, anyone will get well." Cagalli replied cheekily, she seems to enjoy teasing him. "Oh yes." Cagalli muttered as she fished out a small orange item sealed in a clear zip lock from her pocket. "Aaron says he found this inside the pocket of your groom suit that day." She passed the zip lock to him, "It's smashed to bits, one or both of us probably fell on it. Do you know what it is?"
The item is obviously robotic, but Cagalli was right, the casing was so badly damaged Athrun could not tell what it was. He stared at it for a moment, but no memory came to him, he shook his head, "I could check it out later. Let's go before the sun gets too hot."
Ooo
In order not to be followed around by the bodyguards, they essentially stayed within the estate. Cagalli asked the cooks to prepare some finger food and they went to the edge of the estate where a stream flowed and meandered through the countryside and had a quiet brunch picnic under an old oak tree that grew at the bank of the stream.
When they were done with the food, Cagalli suddenly stood up and kicked off her slippers, it was the first time he saw her in a dress, she invited Athrun to play in the water. Athrun shook his head, he did not know where Cagalli wanted to go and had chosen to dress up instead of down, he had wanted to take her out for a nice meal. So he was dressed in a formal business shirt with dark denim jeans and a pair of oxfords. He will never get the water out of his clothes…
"Oh come on Athrun, don't be such a stiff, it will be fun…" She encouraged as she ran back to him with a twinkle of mischief in her eyes. She plopped down beside him and unceremoniously grabbed his ankle, "Cag…?!" He yelped as she swiftly undid his shoelaces and pulled off his shoes and socks and hid them behind her.
"Hey…!" He protested awkwardly, he had not gotten over the fact that she felt no qualms suddenly removing clothing articles from his person, her actions were so slick he wondered if she did it often…
"Just a while, I'll return them to you." She promised, "Come on, Athrun, feel." She demonstrated by placing her delicate, pink feet on the grass. Having no choice, he followed suit, the individual strands tickled the soles of his feet and in between his toes, the sensation was curious. He saw some mimosa to one side, and when Athrun poked one with his big toe, the strand closed, causing a chain reaction that rippled to Cagalli's side, she giggled as the strands tickled her feet.
The sound of her chime-like laughter was surprisingly cute.
She then ran to the river bank and slowly dipped her feet into the water. "Careful." He called out, the bank glistened with moisture, he was worried she will fall. Cagalli only shrugged off his concerns, she was surefooted as a goat on the rocks; that implies that she was used to rougher terrain than this. He had not married a typical born-into-royalty kind of wife after all, he bet that Lacus would slip and fall into the ravine at the first patch of moisture. He placed his chin on the heel of his palm in consideration, Cagalli was really something else...
A sprinkle of cool water onto his face dragged him out of his thoughts, Cagalli laughed as the water dripped onto his collar and he wiped it off with his sleeves. "Come on, the water is so nice." Then splashed water at him again, he did not evade as their stuff were all behind him, including electronics. It was incredibly childish and it occurred to him that she is essentially a water bug. Athrun sighed in resignation, he was already half wet anyway and it was starting to get warmer. He rolled up his sleeves and the hose of his pants and issued his challenge, "Ready or not, here I come."
"Ever ready!" She responded with enthusiasm. She went to where the water was a bit deeper and splashed at him. He retaliated, they splashed at each other like little children for a while, he tried to block or evade to the best of his abilities. Cagalli was fast-just as he had expected-but he was faster and more accurate, he was certain that Cagalli is definitely wetter (or at least as wet as him). She was laughing heartily all the way, squealing in delight as the cool water baptized her face. She suddenly came closer and beat the surface of the water furiously. The turbulence, combined with her momentum caused her to seemingly lose her footing on the smooth pebble river bed, and she slipped forward with a gasp of surprise.
Athrun rushed forward, caught her arms and tried to break her fall, but the force was greater than expected and resultantly she sort of fell on him as he was pushed backwards, he too, fell gracelessly.
"Are you alright?!" Cagalli exclaimed as she picked herself up, shaking moisture out of her hair. "Your head, oh gosh! I'm sorry. Did you hit your head?"
He stared dumbly at her, quite unable to reply as heat crawled up his face.
By a stroke of blind, dumb luck, he realized that she was seated in the V-region of his legs, her face was only a couple centimetres from him. The shallow water came up to his chest and Cagalli was basically drenched, she was wearing a pastel green dress which was opaque before, now the wet fabric clung to her bosoms, revealing a simple seamless brassiere beneath…
He tore his gaze away wordlessly, berating himself for behaving all Mr Hormones, it was unlike him, usually he had more self-control than this. "I'm alright." He replied hastily as he somehow extracted himself and got up, then offered her a hand while trying not to look at her. She took his hand and they waddled out of the stream, Cagalli gave a small gasp of pain and he looked back, there was some red oozing from a cut at her ankle.
"Does it hurt?" He asked, concerned.
"A little." Cagalli forced a pained smile, "I think a loose twig snagged me just now."
That will explain why she suddenly lost her footing, he sighed. "Slowly, see if you can walk."
Cagalli made two unsteady steps towards him, then almost fell again, he was ready this time and he simply braced her fall. She obviously will have difficulty ascending the rocky parts…
"Don't mind me, princess." He said simply as he gathered her off the ground wholesale, Cagalli's protest went back down her throat as he swung her legs up and carried her bridal style.
"Athrun~! This is embarrassing, you always do this in front of the kids!" She muttered her objections. "Put me down, I can walk!"
"There are no kids here, stop struggling or I may drop you." He threatened as he walked forward uncaringly. For some reason Cagalli smiled in a manner of reminisce, "You've never dropped me…"
He grinned at that, at least his track record seems decent. "Then don't give me a reason to start. There." He set her down on a dry rock that's a little higher and started examining the wound. It was a clean cut, there were no visible splinters, for safety measure he washed the wound with the stream water then wrapped it up with a handkerchief from his breast pocket.
"Sorry…" Cagalli muttered in a low voice as he worked.
"What for?"
She gazed at him longingly, it was a moment before she replied dejectedly. "I have three days to seduce you and I blew it, all I've been is your burden…"
Athrun could not find a reply, no lady in existence will probably ever admit something like that to his face. He also wanted to scream at her, she was affecting him so much and she does not even know it. If she was not even trying, Athrun was sincerely afraid that his heart will explode the moment she really starts being serious about the seducing…
"Well, I'm doing it willingly. You're not my burden, not a heavy one, at least…" He replied at long last.
"You always say that, even when I'm eight months pregnant with the twins." Cagalli chuckled, she seemed to remember something he cannot see. Athrun frowned then, she was the only one carrying the memories of their past, the gravity, the joys, the sorrows were all hers alone to bear. If he left, she will be the one left behind bearing the despair, the thought alone was heart-wrenching. He saw her cry last night, then, he felt his heart bleed. He told himself he never wanted to see this woman cry again, if possible…
"Athrun…?" She whispered, "You are giving me that look again."
"What look?" He inquired, she could read him like an open book even when he considers himself a closed one.
"The I-have-so-much-to-say-but-I-don't-know-where-to-begin look."
"Oh. That…" He replied softly, but did not elaborate, he still did not know where to start. She was spot-on, Athrun was convinced by then that she was really his better half. The flesh of his flesh, the rib over his heart that God had taken out to form a suitable companion...
She twisted her mouth into a pout, "These few days you give me that look, a lot. Please tell me if anything bothers you, okay? I will still answer your questions."
He did not want to make a promise he cannot keep, he also did not know how to tell her that. He only nodded in a placating manner after a while. She seemed happy with the compromise, then took a deep breath and blurted out, "Can I kiss you?"
He widened his eyes as his heartbeat sped up, she added on hastily, "As a 'thank you' kind of way, of course."
It seemed strange to ask for permission, she has never asked before when she pecked him on his cheeks, he gazed at her steadily as his heart hammered against his chest. "If you want to…" He replied in a voice that he hope sounded calm and collected and not that he looked forward to that too much...
She proceeded to kiss him, this time full in the mouth. Her hands fluttered like birds on his neck and his jaw, it was quick and in Athrun opinion; it ended way too soon. There was unmistakable lust, desire in the instant. There was intimacy, yearning, with that one kiss it also revealed that she knew what he liked, what he did not and how far to go. Her large honey-coloured eyes then gazed at him in a sultry manner, she was merely testing the waters, the invitation stood open, inviting him in.
Her breath washed over his face while he could only stare stupidly at her and try to calm the raging river of hormones. By reflex his hands are raised, as if wanting to pull her towards himself. He exhaled shakily, the breath that rushed past his windpipe was hot.
Oh God, it was torture to have a creature like her romance him with no room in sight…
She covered over her own mouth shyly, "I am making better progress than Ariel."
"Who?" Athrun was thrown off by her sudden mention of a fictional character though he had a pretty good guess which Ariel she was referring to.
"The Ariel in your bedtime story last night." Cagalli gave him a sly look, he widened his eyes and coughed to hide his embarrassment. He had gathered the children and the baby and did an animated story-telling of 'The little mermaid' last night, he chose the sanctified, happy version of course. The kids analyzed the story to bits. Suki acted as Prince Eric's dog, barking and joining in the fun. It was so childish and uncharacteristic of him he swore the children to secrecy to never tell Cagalli. Alas, he was found out.
"You were spying…" He muttered, pretending to be a little crossed.
"Nay, it my routine to check on them, I just peeped through the door hole. For managing to earn a kiss from the prince, Ariel will get to remain human and stay with him…" She gazed at Athrun longingly, her fingertips touched his cheek.
"Do I get the same…?"
The answer was clear to Athrun in that instant, he almost replied before he stopped himself. A series of thoughts ran through his head in one instant and he knew what he should do.
"Two days." He replied calmly, she pouted again and he smiled.
She threw her hands up in mocked frustration, "I knew you'd say that! Why did I try? How do you do that, keeping secrets like a maximum security vault in Switzerland?"
It was effortless, Athrun was not sure how to tell her that.
"Let's go back." Cagalli suggested.
"How are you gonna get back like this?" Athrun asked deliberately.
"I was hoping you'd lend me a shoulder for a clutch…" She requested.
"I'll do better, I'll give you a ride." He replied, Cagalli raised an eyebrow. He swiftly he collected the stuff and tossed them into the picnic basket, linked it at his elbow, then piggy-backed Cagalli.
"Woah~!" Cagalli exclaimed, "Hey, you sure it's okay? It's a long way back."
"It's only ten to fifteen minutes." Probably nine to twelve, now that he had started walking. "Hang on to me."
"You have a cut on your arm, too!" She muttered worriedly, "What if it worsens?"
"I'm fine." He cut short his replies, saving his breath for the journey.
She stopped protesting after that, slowly she draped her arms over his shoulders and linked her hands in front of his chin.
"Thank you…" She whispered into his ear, was it his imagination or did she touch his ear with her lip deliberately? Then slowly, with a suggestive smile, she added. "You know what, Athrun…?" She dropped her voice further.
"I'm usually the one riding you anyway…"
That was crazily bold, it almost stopped him in his tracks. Again, he did not know how to reply to the flirting…
Oh God, please kindly provide a room…
Ooo
That same night, Athrun sat at his study table, satisfied at the array of tools presented before him, he liked the older version of himself a little more. The table itself was large and with one corner dedicated to tinkering, it was a mini workshop and he had amassed a small but considerable range of hardware. He carefully poured up the contents of the zip lock onto his workspace, put on gloves and started to take the remains of the robot apart, looking for whatever he can salvage. The only strange thing on the desk was a little cream-coloured teddy bear that sat on one side of the desk, he wondered if that belonged to him, he was not given to cute and useless things…
After they returned from the stream, the maids started fussing over them. She came looking for him again after they showered, fresh bandages in hand and helped him to change the damp bandages on his person. She did not bother getting a doctor for her ankle, so he insisted to help her dress the wound. He spent that half hour trying not to look at her because she spent that half an hour gazing at him, smiling in a self-sure manner. Her attention so intense and devoted it cause the fine hairs on the back of his neck to stand.
Any case, she was called off for a last minute matter that required her immediate attention. He spent the rest of the evening baby-sitting Lacus's baby so the couple could get some rest. He overheard them shouting at each other about a soiled diaper, it is likely due to fatigue. Athrun very calmly changed the diaper and offered to babysit, Kira almost kissed him in gratitude. Apparently, they had made arrangements for a confinement lady, but the preparation was all done under the assumption that Lacus will give birth in PLANTs. She had given birth three weeks ahead of schedule, likelihood it was due to shock and Athrun felt a little apologetic that whoever's after Cagalli had implicated Lacus's health.
Lacus was not travel-worthy at the moment and essentially they are grounded on Earth, Kira has duties in PLANTs that require attending to as well, that formed part of the argument. Lacus fed and passed Athrun her baby most gratefully, then fell asleep almost immediately upon touching the bedsheets, her gait a little zombie-like, it shows how exhausted she was.
At present, the nameless baby was asleep in the same cot with Melody after Athrun played and entertained them with trinkets, the sound of their gentle breathing was very soothing (Compared to the wailing). He had to change his shirt after burping Lacus's baby as there was some milk regurgitated down his chest and Melody's poop stain on his sleeve. He now understood the value of the short sleeve T-shirts and that apron lying beside Melody's cot.
A shifting of curtains behind Athrun caught his attention, he turned back and stared at the area for a while. It was nothing, perhaps just a gush of wind, but he could not shake the feeling that there was someone there. Athrun's attention turned back on the orange object on his desk. He increased the light intensity as he saw a glimpse of reflection, he picked up a pair of fine tipped forceps and carefully eased away cracked debris till he was able to see what was beneath. He was able to glimpse a teenie weenie reflective, metallic chip, it was only as wide as the whites of his nails. He grasped the corner of the memory chip with the forceps firmly, then held his breath for stability.
He pulled out the memory chip, whole. He let out the breath and started to power up the labtop, searching for a universal adaptor with which to view the contents. The memory chip worked, there weren't many files inside. One was the programming, likely implying that this robotic creature will be able to have some sort of self-governing autonomy, the program was similar to Haro. There's a chance he actually made this thing as well. There was also an internal memory function which had come up completely blank. The other was a file named 'To Cagalli', there was a single video clip inside, Athrun double clicked on the file and waited…
Ooo
"Tell Athrun nothing." Cagalli ordered as she flipped through the files, her eyes wide. "Nothing." She repeated as Kisaka look like he wanted to rebut.
"But the assassin's identity…" Kisaka pointed out, "He has a vested interest, surely he would want to know."
"What good will it do if he knew?" Cagalli only said dejectedly, "It will only hurt him…Besides these are speculations, nothing concrete. He's overwhelmed as it is, cut him some slack. And…"
Cagalli sighed heavily, "Now that he's lost his memory, he's like a clean slate, he has no memories of our past but at the same time…He doesn't live in constant guilt, the past no longer weighs him down. Kisaka…I'm torn, conflicted, I don't know what to feel. Give me time to sort this out, to sort myself out, please keep the information confidential for now, one step at the time."
"As you wish, my queen."
She made a face, "Why, you too?"
Kisaka smiled back, "It's shorter than 'Princess', and it fits your JD more." He explained. She pondered over his words, they did make sense. "I guess you're right."
"I don't need you to tell me I am. It's late, my lady. Let's set aside the argument about titles for now, go back and rest. I'm sure your family is waiting, good luck with Athrun."
"Why…?" Cagalli questioned suspiciously.
"I heard from the other guards, his memory loss is around 10 years. He's more Zaft ace than anything, he actually assaulted Aaron today."
For a moment Cagalli was alarmed, "What…wait, is he gonna be charged?" She questioned.
"Oh, no, no." Kisaka waved his hands, an uncharacteristic smile on his face. "I say it in a way of I-wish-I-was-there-to-see-it-for-myself. My lady, you know Aaron and his liking for men and for sadomasochism. It's probably his dream come true to have Athrun assault him, even better if Athrun had actually hit him. There can be no charge if the ehem* victim does not mind."
A disturbing mental image of Athrun holding a black whip and a leather leash around Aaron's neck flashed into her head and she waved it away in distaste.
Ooo
Cagalli went back past midnight, the house was quiet, there was no wailing, for once. To be honest she was quite worried when that happens. She went back to the room, tried to navigate by darkness and successfully showered. When she went back into the room, she realized Athrun was not in it. The night before, Athrun had misgivings about sleeping in the same bed as her, he actually suggested the oh-so-prude and old-fashion method of placing a cup of water in the middle of the bed which she of course rejected. Eventually, he took refuge on an old sofa at the far end of the room. Today, he is apparently nowhere in the room, to make matters worse, Melody was missing as well.
For a moment, panic seized Cagalli. Had Athrun left the place? Left her? She started searching frantically, room by room, asking the guards on night duty where they have last seen Athrun. Apparently, he was not seen by them all evening, her spirits sank lower and lower till she bumped into Lacus nursing her baby on the second-floor balcony. Lacus asked in concern the moment she saw that Cagalli was on the verge of tears. "What's the matter?"
"Did you see Athrun?!" Cagalli cried.
"He's been with the kids all evening, Melody is with him too. I think they had a pillow fight, or maybe a tickling battle, it sounded like a couple of strangled chickens."
So he had not left, that set her heart at ease. She heaved a sigh of relief, bit her lip and reined in her emotions, wiping roughly at her face. "Oh…! Good, good…" Pillow fighting sounds benign enough. "Thank you, Lacus."
"You're welcome… Athrun helped me out with this little one today too, he seems like he's in a good mood after you two's hot date this morning, I don't think he will run off without telling you. Don't be so worried."
Now Cagalli just felt silly for her anxiousness those minutes ago, she nodded in agreement. Lacus grinned, then gazed at her in genuineness, she placed a hand over Cagalli's.
"Cagalli…the strongest bindings in the world is not that of iron shackles, but a bind from heart-to-heart. Even if he runs off, he will always run back, if he cannot run back, the love and longing intensifies till it consumes him."
Cagalli understood what Lacus meant, it happened in space, it may happen on earth again. She kept the love letter that Athrun wrote on the verge of death those months ago, it still tears her up every time she reads it. The prerequisite is that there is love, right now she was not sure whether Athrun loves her. Sure they probably had a moment or two at the stream today, Athrun blushed and stuttered uncharacteristically, but that was simply infatuation: puppy-love. Cagalli did not feel like settling for less…
Lacus patted her head kindly, and she smiled sadly at that. "Thanks."
"Run along, your little ones await."
She thanked Lacus and went to the children's room. She stood outside for a while, listening intently, there were no more strangled chickens, just even, deep breathing. There were a few sets, definitely more than two. She inched the door open a little, trying to make as little noise as possible.
She felt her heart being squeezed at the sight in front of her.
There had indeed been a pillow fight, after that the rumpled pillows have been piled into a pillow fort. Max's and Marlene's beds have been pushed together and the mattress covers have been unearthed to form a makeshift canopy. Beneath the canopy slept all the reasons that kept her awake and made her smile. Melody was snuggling on Athrun's chest with the cream-coloured teddy bear that Cagalli gifted to Athrun so many seasons ago. Marlene laid her head on Athrun left arm, curled up into a fetal position while Max had his feet on Athrun's stomach in a starfish shape. As usual, Marlene was nicely tucked in and Max had kicked his blanket off. All of them were somewhat in the feet in, head out position at the opening of the canopy and there was a small story book near Athrun's head, which suggests he was reading them a bedtime story with the kids gathering around him before they decided to call it a day.
Cagalli went ahead to kiss each of her children, Marlene murmured sleepily, 'Mommy…' before drifting back to sleep. How she wanted to join them if she could, but there was no space in the pillow fort and she cannot possibly squeeze in without waking all of them. She came to the last recipient of her kiss.
Athrun was in his Zaft tee shirt he must have dug up from the closet, old die-hard soldier habit of his, some of the shirts were so old that patches were threadbare, but Athrun liked them the best and refused to toss them. One of his hands were draped protectively over Melody's back, Cagalli wondered how she can remove Melody without waking Athrun. There's a chance that Melody will still wake up wailing at night or pee and poo in her diaper, Max and Marlene has school tomorrow, it was better if Melody slept in her cot.
She thought for a while, wondering whether there was any way to wake Athrun gently. Then sighed, she just had to be quick enough if he accidentally strangled her. Yet there was one way she has yet to try, she spent the day dispensing and taking liberties and she hoped that he won't mind. She leaned over her husband's face, taking in his scent. His breath washed over her skin, deep, even and strong. "Athrun…" She whispered as a heads-up, before she took a deep breath, lowered herself and kissed him.
Before she knew it, his lips kissed back. She pulled away in surprise as Athrun opened his eyes blearily, when he saw that it was her, he gave a tender expression that will cause most women to swoon.
"This is the first time you didn't try to kill me when I wake you…" She uttered in amazement, more to herself than to him.
He made a face, "…Maybe because…my enemies won't kiss me so gently." It was surprisingly cheeky, she resisted the urge to whack him.
"Pass me Melody, please. I need to feed her or she will wake up cranky." She said instead.
"Oh…" He observed Marlene still nesting on his arm, then whispered. "Can you do it? Careful with her head…" Cagalli nodded, then with Athrun supporting Melody's bum, managed to extract her expertly from Athrun's chest. Melody blinked upon reaching Cagalli's bosoms, then reached instinctively for the buttons holding her uniform together. Cagalli began to panic, the hurt the night before surface, and she pried Melody's little hands off as she made to stand up and get away as fast as she can.
Surprisingly, the hand that reached up to hold hers was Athrun's. He patted a spot on the sheets where she could lean back against the bedding, whispering. "She's hungry, you can feed her here, heck, you can feed her wherever you want, Cagalli."
She gazed at him in wonder, mouthing, 'Really?'. He nodded, then seemed to change his mind about something, he slowly removed himself from the other two kids, reaching back and tucking them in again. He quickly gestured for her to exit the room. When they closed the door behind them, Melody started fussing impatiently, reaching at Cagalli. Athrun ran ahead, casting a glance behind to tell Cagalli to keep up and they made it in breakneck speed back to their room. Right before Melody start crying, they managed to introduce the baby to her milk and they sat in satisfaction as they watched Melody feed.
"That's close." Cagalli observed in exhilaration, it felt like some mission impossible. She noted that Athrun was gazing at Melody gumming her, she was worried.
Curiosity was burning within her, she had to ask.
"Yesterday…Why did you…?!" She questioned pathetically, hoping that she did not sound too hurt. He looked away at that, Cagalli wondered if it were just her imagination, but he seems to be blushing. After a while, he coughed awkwardly, Cagalli felt her heart sink, her insecurities flared to life.
"Tell me the truth…Athrun." She implored, rounding in front of him irritably when he refused to reply. "Athrun, look at me. Do you think I'm…ugly?" He gazed at her with wide eyes, she pressed. "I'm not a slim girl anymore with a nice and toned body, I have had three children, I…I have stretch marks on my stretch marks! If you cannot stand the sight of me I need to know…! I'd…!"
His lips crashed upon hers, he gave her no warning as he kissed her fiercely and possessively, his arms encircling her, holding her and Melody. She had no time to gasp her surprise as he stole her breath away, his lips then lingered on her face, her jaw, her neck, he even bit her lightly in a way that was tantalizing and pleasurable. His hands held her against him, stroking hard down her waist, her buttocks, her thighs. She inhaled audibly as she felt his hardness against her legs. His breath was hot and rushed, it washed over her bare skin, causing goose bumps. He did not stop kissing her till he reached the V of her bosoms, where he laid one last tender kiss right over her heart.
Cagalli was sure that her heart had skipped a few beats, blood was pounding wildly in her ears. It was the first time in the last few months that he had initiated something so passionate.
More importantly, now Athrun was…Did he regain his memory?
"Athrun…?" She asked shakily, he did not look up.
Abruptly, he stood up and backed away from her. The back of his hand against his mouth, his eyes wide, as if appalled by what he had done.
"Athrun?" she pressed, it looked as if it were taking all the self-control he still had to stay away from her. She secretly hoped that he will change his mind and ravish her on the spot. Without saying a word, he quickly backed off and let himself out of the room.
Cagalli watched him go, then touched her lips, reliving the sensation of his passions and she giggled. Contrary to his untimely escape, his body had done the talking, there was no way he could hate her and romance her like that. She calmed herself with deep breaths, but cannot help letting out a giggle. When Melody was done, she kissed her on the forehead and tucked Melody into her cot as she went to the bathroom to brush her teeth, wondering if she should deliver Athrun a blanket and toothbrush.
Unknown to her, the assailant chose this moment to slip out of the shadows and started approaching Melody's cot...
ooo
Thank you for waiting~
I hope two months is not too long a wait, that will probably be my speed. My free time is spent buying baby goods, remodelling the house and basically nesting. (Like you have a compulsive urge to organize.) Yes and getting kicked by baby every other hour, Waaaaaa this is one strong baby, I feel my insides moving.
It is confirmed, we are gonna have a baby boy~~! I wanna name him 'Athrun' my hubby say cannot. ." *Cries*. Well, I think it is a nice name,
Hint hint, there is meaning to slotting in Daniel's story and motivation. =P
R&R please~
Ming