AN: Short chapter this week. I've only just managed to get it finished because I've been so busy this week, combating social anxiety with alcohol. I'm still not sure on how well it worked... ^^

Thanks go out to everyone who reads, with special thanks to all of you who have faved/followed and super awesome, special, rainbow thanks to Barleyguy and Falcon87456 for the reviews!

Hope you enjoy!

Chapter 37 - Well, We're All Victims of Our Own Gene Pool. Someone Must Have Peed in Yours.

Entry 105

Sometimes I wonder if Silvanus could be a bigger flirt. I often wonder what his bonded must think of him hitting on every woman he meets, but he does it with such flair that it's impossible to take him seriously.

I'm still refusing to call him 'Aelius'. It's become somewhat of a joke now, especially since I won't let him call me 'Rosa' either.

Zaeed has been keeping us both here for the past week. Apparently, he's waiting for some 'brilliant' pilot to show before we head out on the latest job. I don't understand what the big deal is, but Zaeed seems to be under the impression that we need him.

Silvanus and I have just been passing the time by pissing around. There's not much else to do. I tried to ask him about this pilot we're waiting on, but he just seemed to find something funny.

Stupid turian...

Entry 106

Oh, I could just kill Zaeed sometimes.

We weren't waiting on this pilot for any specific reason, other than he had got it into his head that I would like him.

As if!

If his head got any bigger, he wouldn't be able to fit it through the airlock. I swear, he is the most infuriating man I have ever met. I can't believe Zaeed thought that I would actually like him. Urgh!

Silvanus just thinks it's hilarious. He has been less than helpful, purposefully leaving me alone with Shepard on more than one occasion. He's lucky I haven't punched him out yet...

Sophia found it very odd. She'd never had any real information on her parents or anything of theirs to hold close. Just vague memories of little things, like how her mother had always tied her hair up with a ribbon and how her father had always read her bedtime stories, usually greek myths. Her grandmother had always been so… quiet on the subject. Only occasionally would she make an odd about comment on how Sophia looked like her mother or had the same mannerisms.

It wasn't until Sophia met Anderson, many years later, that she knew anything more about her parents. But, even then, it wasn't much. It had never felt like enough.

So it felt very odd to have her mother's old diary. To have so much information about the woman who was taken from her so many years ago. It was… very strange…

"Watcha readin'?" Sophia was pulled from her thoughts by Carmen climbing into her lap. She immediately turned off the datapad. Some of it wasn't exactly 'appropriate reading' for a young kid.

"Doesn't matter. When did you get back from school?"

"Just now."

"She's not bothering you, is she?" Tommy asked as he entered the room.

"Not at all. She reminds me of Kira at this age…" Sophia's eyes widened as she realised what she had just said.

Tommy raised an eyebrow, noticing her slip. "Who's Kira?"

"Just… it's a really long story…"

Tommy narrowed his eyes at that. "Nuh-uh. You're not getting away with it that easily."

"It's... classified?"

"Try again."

Sophia sighed, rolling her eyes. "She's my daughter," she admitted, deciding that telling the truth, if nothing else, would be amusing.

"Your… daughter?"

Sophia nodded. "Yeah."

"So, where is she now?"

"With her boyfriend. Or, at least, I'm assuming that after a few weeks on a ship together, they're finally dating."

Tommy just gave her a blank look. "How old is she?"

"Both not yet born and twenty eight."

"That's… You're joking, right?"

"This might take some explaining…"

Nihlus stood in the doorway, paused in his step. He hadn't realised that Kira was in the kitchen area. But, there she was, sitting at the table. Ever since they had recovered the equipment Kira had been… quiet. Just shy of avoiding him. It had been over a week and the situation hadn't gotten any better. It made him wonder if they would ever be able to recover their friendship, never mind the… other aspect of their relationship.

"You're lurking," Kira told him, her eyes not moving from the datapad she was reading.

"I wasn't, I just… I didn't want to intrude."

"It's your ship," she reasoned, honestly seeming confused.

"You just… It seemed like you needed… space."

"Oh… Erm, actually, I thought that you might need it… I didn't want to crowd you."

She looked so sheepish and awkward, prompting Nihlus to move closer to her, sitting as far as he could from her while still on the bench.

"So… you haven't been avoiding me?"

"Not intentionally. I just… I hate this…"

"Me too. But, it wasn't just that, was it? You've been so absorbed in whatever you've been reading."

Kira nodded. "Yeah. Cerberus managed to wipe some of their data before my parents arrived at the facility in the other timeline. Nothing that we thought was important but…"

"What does it say?"

She shook her head, looking away. "Just like we thought, nothing really important. Just more information on how they altered us. Makes for interesting reading but… it's not too shocking."

"I thought you were trying to be more honest," he told her, earning him a blush followed by a withering look.

"Fine. It's… more than interesting. It explains a few things, at least."

"But you're not going to tell anyone?"

She sighed, before reluctantly shaking her head. "I should, shouldn't I? After everything that happened last time I didn't tell Tom, but…"

"More things no one should ever be burdened with?" he asked softly. He wanted to move closer, to comfort her, but he wasn't sure if she would want him to.

To his surprise, she scooted closer to him as she said "Yeah" under her breath. "I'm sorry," she told him after a moment, realising that she had moved so close that they were almost touching.

"Don't be," Nihlus told her as he carefully moved his hand up to her arm. Her eyes followed his hand, but she didn't object to his touch.

Her eyes moved back up from his hand to meet his gaze, causing his breath to stop as he held perfectly still. Kira regarded him for a few moments before leaning in, her lips inching closer to his-

"Approaching Quarian fleet," the VI announced, breaking the spell.

"I should-" Nihlus started as Kira pulled away.

"Yeah..."

"Tali, it's way too early in the morning to be up," Tom told her as he found her in the lab, once again.

She had been less upset since her father's funeral but she was throwing herself into her work, helping Xen and Gerrel with the Geth data her father had uncovered. However, she refused to go to the other lab ships to help, instead working remotely. Often from beside the stasis unit.

"You can talk," Tali countered. "You've barely slept since you and Kira went your separate ways again."

Tom frowned a little at her phrasing, given that they left the Normandy at the same time. "It's probably just the change of location…"

"Right. Except getting thrown thirty years into the past didn't upset your sleep patterns at all."

"How would you know? We weren't even together at that point."

"Because my sleep was off and I was up all night and you always ended up in engineering when you had free time. There's no way you wouldn't have been down there if you weren't sleeping. You only don't sleep well when you're stressed. And, apparently, being separated from Kira is one of your stress triggers. Wait, have you not noticed this?" she asked, seemingly genuinely surprised.

"It doesn't bother me when Kira's not around. Jesus, Tali, I'm not a kid anymore…"

"Because, you know, that didn't sound defensive at all," she teased. "I thought it made sense. I mean, you said that Cerberus grew you two in pairs, right? You were meant to be part of a unit. That was why they were going to terminate both of you, wasn't it? Even though Kira was the only one… that didn't meet their specifications."

Tom sighed at that, knowing that she was right but really wishing that she wasn't. "You know how pathetic it is that being away from my twin sister bothers me so much, right?"

Tali just laughed a little at that. "A little insomnia isn't the worst thing in the world," she told him before getting up and moving closer to him, placing her hands on the sensitive spots just above his hips, knowing that, though he couldn't feel her touch through his armour, he would take the hint. "I'll just have to keep reminding you why it's sometimes a good thing to have more space…"

"No arguments here," Tom replied, pulling her a little closer. "But if this is where your mind has been, I would imagine you would be spending more time in our room than here. You can work just as well there, after all, if not better…"

Tali sighed a little, not missing his insinuation. "I know. I just… I know it probably sounds silly but I feel better being here, you know?"

Tom nodded at that. "I know. I wasn't really looking for an explanation, I was just wondering if you had realised how much time you're spending here…"

"Yeah," she admitted, "I had. Do you know how much time you've been spending pretending not to watch me over here?"

"Not much else to do here. At least you've got your work. I just feel… helpless," he admitted, prompting Tali to pull his head down so that she could press their helmets together.

"I know, my love… I know…"

"You know, Titus, when we told your son to keep an eye on Viktal, we thought he might do it a little closer to the quarian fleet…"

The elder Vakarian just chuckled at that as Sparatus entered his office. The place had been barely used over the years since he preferred to operate on ships, rather than from behind a desk. "Septimius," Titus started, opting for using the councillor's first name, "if you truly thought that would happen, you clearly don't know my son…"

Sparatus regarded him closely as he moved closer into the office, allowing the door to shut behind him. "Do you?" he asked simply, once they were alone.

Titus gave him a warning growl of subharmonics at that, but he quickly stifled it with a sigh. "I wish I could say 'yes' but… these last few days with him have been… He's no longer the hot-headed young man who turned his back on me to become a Spectre. That much is clear. He has found a purpose in stopping these Reapers. I had actually been meaning to speak with you about that ever since I had heard that you were making a short trip to Palaven."

"So, he's managed to rope you into this 'Reaper' problem too, has he?"

"Don't try to play politics with me, Septimius. We both know that this threat is very real. You more than anyone else. There's no way that the council actually believe that Sovereign was just a geth ship…"

"No. But what can we do? Panic everyone?"

"You could give Garrus the help he needs to get us prepared. I think it may be the only way to survive this."

Sparatus sighed at that. "You might be right, but this is so tied up in politics. Especially since, well… Titus… How much do you know about your son's recent… adventures?"

"He told me everything I needed to know," the silver plated turian replied, curtly.

"How about the fact that, the last time I saw her, Shepard had replaced her usual fringe ornament with one that was a very specific shade of blue?"

Titus almost cursed under his breath as his suspicions were confirmed. "I had suspected… Spirits, if only my Rayna was still here… She always knew how to talk sense into the boy."

Sparatus gave him a trill of sympathy at that. "He very much needs it. I still can't believe… a human! How have you not confronted him about it yet?"

Titus sighed as he tiredly rubbed his eyes. "Because it's my fault. It was my job to make sure my children didn't repeat my mistakes and I failed… Spirits, of everyone it could have been…"

The turian councillor gave him a questioning look at that. "It is true that Shepard is a particular nuisance but… surely the identity of the human is not the issue."

"No, but the Spirits do seem to have a funny sense of humour…"

"There is something else…"

"Something other than my son bonding to a human? This should be good…"

"How much do you know about the time travellers? The turian we're having Garrus keep an eye on and his sister?"

Titus shrugged. "Just what was in the official report and what Garrus has told me. Two time travellers from many years in the future. They claim to be from an alternate timeline where the war with the humans ended fairly quickly. They're brother and sister, but obviously not biologically, given that they're different species. Garrus speaks highly of them. He talks about them as if they're young but he seems to have taken on a mentor role with them, from what I can gather..."

"I don't really know anything more than that," Sparatus admitted. "But... if you ever see Tom in person... To say that he looks like Garrus would be an understatement. And, while I'm no good with human faces, Tevos assures me that the same is true for Tom's sister Kira and Shepard..."

Titus just shook his head at that. "I don't have time to listen to speculation, Septimius."

"I just thought you would want to know..."

Kira knew that security was important to the quarian fleet but she was struggling to find it anything other than annoying as she waited to be cleared to dock with lab ship.

"Spectre Vessel, you now have clearance to dock."

"Thank you," Kira replied, fighting the sarcasm that threatened to darken her tone.

"They finally let us in?" Nihlus asked as he entered the cockpit. Ever since their near-kiss, he had been off… Well, Kira wasn't too sure where he'd been. He'd mumbled something about checking the engines before disappearing.

She decided not to question his recent whereabouts, however. She didn't want to draw any more attention to the awkwardness between them. "Yep. Took them long enough… You'd think the fact that my QEC node is keyed into my cybernetics so that no one else can use it would be a good enough security measure for them…"

"Did Tom not sort it out before we arrived?"

"Apparently he didn't finish," she replied, rolling her eyes as the docking sequence finished and they donned their helmets.

"You must be Kira, Tom's sister," Admiral Raan greeted as they boarded the lab ship.

"Admiral. It's been too long. Not that you've met me in this timeline…"

"I hadn't realised we had met in yours. Tom didn't mention it."

"Yeah, I don't always keep my brother informed of everything…" Especially not when I end up on the wrong side of the law… Not that that time was even really my fault, she thought, but kept her mouth shut. This was one occasion when she found herself thankful of the fact that she had managed to escape her past…

"Hey guys," Tom greeted as he and Tali arrived before pulling Kira in for a hug.

"Hey fratellino. Got your stuff, just tell me where to put it."

"That's the last of it," Nihlus announced as he put down the last piece of equipment.

"Awesome," Kira replied as she lifted her head from where she and Tali were elbow deep in setting it up.

"Need us to help setting up?" he asked. He and Tom had been relegated to the heavy lifting.

"No, we're probably good. Too many cooks and all that…"

"Well, I was thinking that the VI in the ship needed… fine tuning."

"Just don't break anything," Kira told him, rolling her eyes.

"You know that it's my ship, right? I can break stuff if I want to…"

"Yeah, not when I'm the one who ends up fixing it," she countered.

Nihlus just responded with a wave of his hand as he headed back to the ship, leaving the two women alone once again.

"What?" Kira asked as she noticed how the quarian was watching her.

"Nothing. Just wondering what's going on with you two."

Kira sighed at that. "It's complicated…"

"So is quantum computing, but I somehow managed to get my head around that."

"It's just… I might have… We may have… slept together…" Kira mumbled, so that Tali could barely hear her.

Of course, Tali did hear and responded with a squeal. "I knew once you two were working together, you would eventually get together."

"Tali, we're not together. It was just one time… Okay, well, maybe twice… But still, we haven't… It's complicated…"

Tali sighed at that. "How is it complicated? You like him, he clearly likes you, you've readily admitted that you want a relationship with him… I don't get it, what's the problem?"

"The problem is that I reactivated my pheromones for a mission and that's when we… you know… And now I have no idea if his feelings are genuine or not…"

"Oh… So you think it's just the remnants of the pheromones causing him to only think he likes you?"

"Exactly!" Kira exclaimed, glad someone finally understood. "What if I do just ignore it? Assume his feelings are genuine and allow us both to go down this path… And then, one day - maybe tomorrow, or in a week, or years from now - he turns around and realises the feelings aren't there any longer. That they had never really been there…"

"How long have the pheromones been deactivated again?"

"Over a week… I know, I know… If it was going to wear off, there would probably be some signs by now… I just… I can't get rid of the fear that it'll happen and I'll… I just can't hurt myself like that, you know?"

"I understand," Tali told her. "I mean, I think that you should just ignore the fear, but I get it."

Kira sighed. "Trust me, I don't know how much longer the fear will win out… Just being around him is almost intolerable. I mean, I feel like some lovesick teen but… Damn, you should see the way he looks at me… Guys have looked at me like that before but it's certainly never affected me like this."

"You're not going to last another week."

"Probably not," Kira admitted, reluctantly. "Anyway, enough about my problems. I mean, I'm not the one with a baby on the way. You know, as soon as we finish setting up here."

Tali sat back a bit, pausing her work. "Yeah…"

"What?"

"Nothing. Just… no one's said it quite like that since it all started. 'Baby on the way'..."

"So how are you dealing with all of this? Even for us, this is a little crazy."

Tali sighed. "Honestly? I don't know. It wasn't ever something I thought about and then, all of a sudden, it's 'hey, you have a daughter - kind of'. I mean, how are you meant to deal with this? Especially coming off of the back of… well, you know what they say about not making major life decisions so soon after losing someone you're close to…"

"Yeah, the general consensus on that is that it's a bad idea…"

"But then… I see the images being recorded of her and… I can't really explain it. She's ours, mine and Tom's. And I love her already… Despite the fact that she's not even technically here, yet. Plus, you should see Tom when he's talking about it all. I mean, he's being careful to not get over excited, especially given how this might not work out, but… He's going to make a great dad."

"I don't doubt that," Kira agreed. "Just as I don't doubt that you'll be a great mom."

"Yeah…" Tali agreed quickly.

Kira frowned at her. "What's wrong?"

"Just… I guess if I'm scared of anything… it's that I am not…"

"Not ready?"

"No… Maybe… I just… Purely from a genetics standpoint, I might not be cut-out for this…"

Kira's frown deepened until she figured out what Tali meant. "You're not your father, Tali."

"Really? Because, now that I really think on it, the similarities are… rather striking. But I don't want to be like him. I don't want my daughter to ever doubt the fact that I love her..."

"The fact that you're so worried about it, means that you're not like him, Tali."

The quarian nodded at that, but it was distracted. "Maybe. But, what if I'm worse? What if, instead of like my father, I'm like my mother?"

"I thought all of your memories of your mother were good ones…"

"They are. My point is that there aren't a lot of them." Kira regarded Tali carefully as she paused, wondering if she knew. "Tom hasn't said anything," Tali told her, "but it has become clear enough over the years."

"Tali…"

"I made it out of the Reaper War, at least, didn't I? In your timeline, I mean."

Kira sighed, before nodding reluctantly. "Yeah. You survived the war…"

"Then I died some time after, didn't I?"

"Tali-"

"Kira, please. Just tell me the truth."

Kira bit her lip for a moment, internally debating with herself over how good or bad of an idea it was to tell her. "I… You know that there's no way that future will happen in this timeline, right? There's no way Tom or I will let it."

"I know," Tali confirmed, sounding sincere. "I just… want to know."

"Political assassination. Just less than six years from now."

"Thank you, for being honest with me."

"You okay?"

"Yeah. Like you said, it won't happen this time. I'm determined to not die on her like my mom did…"

"I need a beer," Nihlus announced, the second he re-entered his own ship, taking off his helmet as he went. "Want one?" he asked the other turian.

"Sure. Does this mean we're done with the heavy lifting?"

"The girls have all of the parts they need and I was getting the 'fuck off' signals from Kira. I think she wants to chat with Tali alone…"

"Yeah, I noticed that Kira seemed… off. Any idea what they would be talking about?"

Nihlus sighed at the insinuation as he passed Tom his beer. "Nope."

Tom raised his browplate but was momentarily distracted by the beer he had passed. "Wow, I am suddenly having flashbacks to when I was a kid, getting drunk on ropey beers…"

"What kind of kid drinks this brand of beer?"

"Oh, right. The brand underwent a redesign after the war. They started marketing to kids who just became legal."

"Fuck… I really like this beer…"

"So, are you actually going to tell me what happened between you and Kira, or do I need to beat it out out of you?"

Nihlus laughed a little at that. "I'd like to see you try."

"No, you wouldn't. I could flatten you with my biotics in two seconds."

"Fair point… But, seriously, you're her brother. I'm not talking to you about it… It's too weird."

Tom rolled his eyes at that. "So, can I assume that means that you've slept together?" Nihlus just gave a brief trill of affirmation through his subharmonics, mostly seeming nervous over how Tom would react. "Dude, I was just joking about beating you up before."

"I know, I just… Things have been strained with Kira…"

"You know that you're as bad as each other, right?"

"Hey, I'm trying here. I'm not exactly sure what more I can do…"

Tom sighed. "If you had just been honest in the past, she wouldn't have so much trouble believing you now."

"What are you talking about?"

"That day on the Citadel? Look, you were the one who told Kira that your feelings were nothing more than her pheromones. I'm not saying that you were wrong to lie or that she didn't deserve it, but it's far easier for her to believe that you would still be too hurt and angry at her for leaving to ever love her than it is for her to believe that you found it in yourself to forgive her. You hurt her and she doesn't want to be hurt again. Just like you didn't want to be when you lied in the first place..."

"So, how do I get her to see that my feelings are real? It's a pretty impossible thing to prove."

"Just don't give up on her. She expects that. Kira is her own worst enemy at times, you just have to let her win out over herself."

Nihlus sighed, shaking his head. "So, is this making sense in your head before you're saying it or…?"

"Just be patient."

"Why are you helping me?" Nihlus asked after a few moments, honestly curious.

Tom shrugged. "Because you care about her and, despite the fact that it shouldn't be true, you're actually good for her. She doesn't feel the need to hide with you. A friend once told me that that's what she needed more than anything else and she turned out to be right about everything else, so I'll trust her on that."

"-aven't heard from them at all since getting here?" The sound of his daughter's voice caused Titus to pause as he entered the house. He knew that she was on Palaven but hadn't expected to see her.

"Just brief messages to say they're okay. I imagine they're too caught up to send anything more," he heard Garrus reply.

"What about Shepard? Heard any more on her?"

It wasn't difficult to discern the cause of sorrow in Garrus' subharmonics as he answered the question. "No. I know she's okay… If she wasn't, then there'd be something. No news is good news, it's just… hard."

"You should try giving Tom or Kira a call next time you have some free time. They're probably missing her too."

"Yeah, I just might…" Garrus trailed off as he realised that his father had entered the house.

"Father," he greeted. "How did the meeting go with the councilor?"

"The council are still staying out of this. The help from the Primarch will just have to be enough…" Garrus watched carefully as his father's gaze moved from him to his sister, becoming steely and hard in the process. "Solana," he greeted, his tone distant and cold.

"Titus," Solana replied, surprising Garrus by using their father's first name. Although, what surprised him more was the fact that his father didn't reprimand her for it, instead a small amount of sorrow seemed to escape his iron walls.

"I knew you were on Palaven but I didn't expect to see you here."

"I was just saying goodbye to Garrus before I headed out on deployment. If you'll excuse me, I should really get going…"

Garrus watched as his sister left, her subharmonics trilling with nothing but apathy for the man who fathered her. However, he kept the majority of his focus on his father. Given how little effort his father had put into his relationship with Solana over the years, he found it surprising that he was so easily upset by her.

"You know, if you'd just try to spend some time with her-"

"Garrus," his father cut him off harshly, "you shouldn't speak of things you don't understand."

"What I understand is that Solana needs - no, deserves - better in the way of parents than an absentee father."

"I know that, Garrus," his father told him quietly, surprising him once more. "I know…"