Chapter 36: Breathe

"Don't make me hold him down." Lacey pleaded with Danny. "You do it."

Danny reached over and held Ryker's legs still while the nurse attempted to put in an I.V.

"Da…da." Ryker cried out reaching his free arms towards Danny. "DAAAAAAAADAAAAaaaaaaaaaaa!" Ryker shrieked.

"I can't." Danny breathed out. "I just can't."

"We have to put an I.V. in, sir. Your son is very dehydrated." The nurse explained.

"It's okay, Mr….." Dr. Fennings glanced down at his chart. "Desai." Where had he heard that name before. "The nurse can hold him while I put the I.V. in. He'll be staying the night with us."

"Why?" Lacey sniffed as tears streaked her face. "Ryker needs to be home."

"He will be fine, Sweetie." Dr. Fennings smiled at the young mother. "He has a stomach virus. It is going around. Ryker has just became dehydrated. We need to keep him on intravenous fluids for tonight to replenish his body."

"I should have been home to take care of him." Lacey leaned into Danny's chest crying.

"I …didn't take care of him good enough. I…." Danny started breathing faster. "I fell asleep and he was left in a dirty diaper. He cried so hard….he wouldn't eat. I just …just was so tired."

"It is no one's fault. You both have taken excellent care of this precious boy." Dr. Flenning brushed his finger through the gorgeous baby's hair. Ryker was gasping in little whimpers now that his I.V. was in.

"Why is it in his foot?" Danny questioned. It looked painful.

"Babies are very active. He will pull it out from his hand." The doctor handed the sniveling baby to his mother. Danny took him due to Lacey being upset.

Once every thing calmed down and Ryker was sleeping in Danny's arms, Lacey spoke up. "He said his first word. I just realized he said his first word."

"He did!" Danny captured a glimpse of Lacey's smile. Then he stared at his son. "He called me 'dada'."

Lacey ran her hand up Danny's arm then onto her son's chunky leg. "Just think there was one time when you thought he didn't know you."

"I'm his dada." Danny sighed. "Lacey, why would you think I'd want to leave this life with you and our babies?"

"I just…the scholarship is so important. I didn't want you to miss out. I should have asked before filling it out and writing that essay." Lacey leaned her head on Danny's shoulder.

"Missing out on a scholarship..." Danny hesitated to kiss Lacey on the forehead. "Is NOTHING compared to missing out on you and our children."

Lacey giggled with a nervous laugh. "Danny, Marry me?"

"We're already engaged." Danny answered as he looked quizzically at Lacey.

"No. I mean when he gets out of the hospital, let's go get married. Lets not wait any longer." Lacey was very serious.

"I wish. But my probation won't allow it." Danny ran his hand down to grasp Lacey's fingers. "You don't have to prove anything, Lace. We've both had our doubts and fears. Let's start fresh today. Okay?"

Lacey nodded as she stared at Ryker, who was now sleeping in the hospital bed. The couple was interrupted when Hannah's pediatrician entered the Ryker's hospital room.

"I was called in." She smiled as she looked over Ryker's chart. "He will be fine."

"Good." Lacey sighed in relief. "I don't think I want another baby here for too long."

Dr. Stacey smiled weakly at Lacey before adding. "We need to talk about Hannah." She looked over at Danny. "I saw a group in the waiting room. Maybe a couple of them could stay with Ryker."

Lacey and Danny followed Dr. Stacey into a private office. Karen allowed Jo, Archie, and Sarita to take some time with Ryker while she went to call Judy and inform her of what was going on.

"Hannah is gaining weight. She is up to five pounds and three ounces. Her legs are weaker than we hoped but I still think that she can get more strength in those."

"What is going on?" Danny grasped Lacey's hand. "Please be honest with us."

"Hannah will never be able to be like other children as far as running and playing. She will have to have some type help with mobility such as a wheelchair." Dr. Stacey inhaled. "As you know, we've tried weaning her off of the oxygen. Her levels keep falling when we do." The doctor watched the young teens before continuing. "Hannah was born with Respiratory Distress Syndrome or RDS."

"We know that." Lacey bit her lip as she glanced over at Danny. He nodded in agreement.

"The problem is that Hannah's RDS was only the beginning. I am diagnosing her with bronchopulmonarydysplasia. This is also known as BPD. Your daughter may always need oxygen therapy. We are suggesting putting her on a ventilator." Dr. Stacey studied the worry on Hannah's parents' faces. "I'm sorry. She may never have a normal life."

"How long?" Danny squinted feeling moisture building behind his irises. He still wondered if this was fate's way of punishing him for taking a life.

"We're not sure, Danny. Hannah will probably have problems all her life." Dr. Stacey couldn't help but feel for the teens. She understood they were both so very young to be handling bad news. "Do you have anymore questions?"

"Can we see her?" Lacey's voice broke as asked what both Danny and she wanted to know.

"Of course." Dr. Stacey led them to the nursery. She left the teens to be with their daughter.

As soon as Hannah saw Lacey, she smiled broadly. Lacey couldn't help but chuckle at their daughter's joy at seeing her. Despite Hannah being so sickly, she still had a smile to share when she was given attention from her parents.

"She loves us so much." Lacey picked Hannah up from her incubator. She cradled her against her after pushing the oxygen tubes out of the way. "She is so beautiful."

Danny blinked as he studied his daughter. She was beautiful. Her skin had finally taken on a dark brown tone matching her mother's. She even had dimples when she smiled. Her eyes were more like Danny's eyes. When her hair began to grow, it did so fast. Hannah had thick ringlets of deep chocolate curls that curled tightly to her scalp. He watched as Lacey kissed her daughter's forehead. They would have stayed like that for hours had it not been for an eerie scream coming from a few incubators over.

Nurses ran to the screaming mother as buzzers and beeps sounded in the air. Danny recognized the female that screamed in a pained heartbreak. Her son had came in only three weeks ago. Danny could tell the female had drug problems thus causing problems for her infant.

"NOOOOOOOO! Not my baby!" The female collapsed into the floor grasping her baby to her.

Danny and Lacey watched as the nurses pried the dead infant from his mother's hands.

Lacey glanced down at Hannah then back to Danny. "That was little Isaiah. He wasn't doing so well last night."

Danny pulled up a chair to sit by Lacey. He ran his hand along Hannah's leg. He still never spoke as he stared at his daughter.

"What are you thinking, Danny?" Lacey had to place Hannah back into her bed. She knew the rules of how long Hannah was allowed to be out of the incubator.

"I love her so much, Lace." Danny didn't blink as he stared at his little girl. "I would give up my own life for her to breathe. All I want is for Hannah to breathe."