Tense was not the right word to describe the atmosphere in the Falcon. Rey had joined Poe in the cockpit, where she proved herself to be just as mechanically intelligent as he was. They'd taken off in silence, Poe loading in coordinates for his old home on Yavin IV. He and Luke had agreed that they should head to a familiar but secluded location. The colonies on Yavin IV had rarely seen action since the days of the Inquisition.

"So," Rey started. Poe looked at her. "You're my brother."

"Yeah," Poe sighed. He ran a hand through his hair and tried for a joke. "Looks like you inherited my awesome flying skills and good looks."

Rey smiled at that. "Looks like it." Her tone turned serious. "I thought I recognized you earlier, before I left for Ahch-To, but you didn't know me."

"Uh, yeah." Poe gestured uselessly. "After, uh, Kylo Ren took over, I asked Luke to get rid of my memories of him, of the Force, all of that. Part of it included forgetting you, and - Force, Rey, I'm sorry. I don't know how I could have made that kind of decision."

Rey was quiet for a moment. "You talk about Ren as though he's a completely different person."

"He is, Rey," Poe insisted. "I saw it there, when we were knocked out. Ren tried to attack me, but Ben stopped him. He couldn't have done that if they were same person."

"Maybe," Rey said uncertainly. "Luke has taught me some things, how to use the Force and all that."

"Yeah?" Poe sensed an opportunity to change the subject. "I could help you if you wanted, you know, show you the Force and all that."

Rey stiffened. "Yeah. Sure. Okay."

"Hey, what's wrong?" Poe asked, a familial instinct taking over inside of him. He wanted to put a hand on Rey's shoulder, but he wasn't sure if she'd appreciate the gesture.

"He said the same thing to me," Rey said tightly. "In the forest on Starkiller, when we were fighting."

"Who's - oh."

"After he tried to kill Finn," Rey continued. She stared at the swirling blue masses of hyperspace. "After he killed Han Solo."

"Rey, that wasn't him," Poe said, his hands fidgeting restlessly.

"You keep saying that," said Rey, "but how am I supposed to know the difference? All I see when I look at him is a killer and a monster who hides behind a mask for his crimes."

Poe thought for a moment. "Do you remember anything from when you were younger? Anything about our family?"

Rey shook her head. "Not really. Why? What does this have to do with anything?"

"Our mom died when I was eight. You were one and a half," Poe said thickly. "She had gotten some kind of Dark Side Force sickness. Then it spread to you, and I didn't know what to do. Papa and I did what we could, but between his job as a soldier and me being a kid, it was hard on both of us. But you know who else was there? Someone who helped me look after you when he never had to?"

Rey shook her head.

"Ben," Poe said softly. "Ben was my best friend back then, and he was right there with me. Our parents were away a lot because of the war that was going on in the colony, but we were always together. If I didn't have him, I don't know what I would have done. Eventually, you got better. You know who the first person you asked for was? It was Ben. Ben, who had taken care of you half the nights, who had fed you and played with you like you were his own sister."

"Who later turned into Kylo Ren," Rey finished. Poe didn't answer, and she sighed. "How could he do that? I mean, what in the galaxy would drive him to become so evil like that? I saw it in his mind — he was terrified of never being like Darth Vader."

"Darth Vader was someone before he was Darth Vader, too, Rey," Poe said. He leaned back in his seat. "It's not all just about what's right or wrong or good or evil. We all do what we believe is the best thing for us and the people around us. Sometimes, we have to make hard choices. Ben wanted to end a war. I wanted to forget one."

Rey hesitated a moment. "Do you mind if I ask . . . what happened between you two?"

Poe sighed. "About six years ago, maybe seven now, the war between the Resistance and the First Order was on a much larger scale. Neither side was winning, the Republic was doing nothing, and the casualties only increased. Luke Skywalker had been on our side then, along with the Jedi Order. Ben was one of them. It was always hard for us, the long weeks or even months of separation, and then the only time we might see each other was on a battlefield, at times when my first duty was to keep my team alive, and his to keep his team alive.

"We managed to make it work. He proposed to me the day I had to fly out, and we kept our rings for a long time. Ben told me we'd mke it official once we got back home, but . . . we never did. Well, he didn't, at least.

"He'd been contacting the First Order behind my back, behind all our backs. See, Ben wasn't really a conventional Jedi. He had seen the Force in different ways, maybe because he hung out with me all the time, but he just didn't really follow what Luke was teaching. It wasn't that he thought it was wrong; he just thought that maybe there was more to the Force than what Luke was telling him.

"Anyway, he made sort of a backroom deal with a group of Dark Side Force users and a guy named Supreme Leader Snoke. They raided Endor, and we responded. Ben hailed me for backup, so I immediately went down to the surface. I was flying an A-Wing then, and I'd modified her to carry two people instead of just the one. Anyway, I go, and I don't see anyone. There were bodies on the ground. It was raining. Thundering, actually.

"I saw him then for the first time. Kylo Ren. I don't know how to describe it, but it was like looking at a changeling. He had Ben's face, but his Force signature, for lack of a better word, was different. He had Ben's voice. He said what Ben might have said.

"Rey, Ben only became Kylo Ren because of me. I should have seen it coming earlier. I should have stopped him sooner. He turned because he thought it was the only way he could protect me, and I should have been there to tell him that he shouldn't have made that kind of sacrifice. He basically sold his soul to the Dark Side, and I'm why he did it. So if you want to hate anyone, Rey, just hate me." Poe ran a hand through his hair.

Rey studied him, a half-frown that so resembled their father's pensive "thinking face". "Is that what you've been telling yourself all this time?"

"Who else is there to blame?" Poe shrugged. "Like I said, I didn't see it coming when I should have. That's on me."

"Poe, you know that's not true." Rey leaned forward. "Sometimes, things happen, and we can't stop them. That doesn't mean we're to blame or we're guilty. I don't know much about these kinds of things, but if you could think that about yourself for as long as you have, I think it means that what happened really mattered to you. I mean, we saw you in the med room. I've never seen anyone look at anyone else the way you looked at him. I could sense it in the Force - you two were more than just lovers."

"Yeah, we were," Poe agreed. "I don't know what we are now, though. It's like . . . I've been chasing Ben's memory for the past six years, thinking he was dead. Now he's back, and I remember what happened, and it's almost like he never left. Still . . . something's just off. Too much has happened."

Rey was quiet for a moment. "We're all different people than who we remember ourselves to be, Poe."

Poe thought about that. We're all different people than who we remember ourselves to be. He wanted to reply or make some sort of comment, but he found he just didn't have the words. Rey had summed it up better than he ever could have.

Rey sensed his unease and briefly touched his arm. "Why don't you go back and rest for a bit. I'll take care of things for a while."

"You sure?"

Rey nodded.

Poe managed to smile. "Thanks. Comm me up when we're ready to get out of hyperspace."

With that, he turned and left the cockpit, running his hand over the familiar walls. It was likely that Ben was still knocked out from the sedatives they'd used before takeoff. Poe had no doubt that Ben could have faked unconsciousness, but from the sendoff they'd received, it was probably better that Ben slept through it. Either way, Poe made his way to the crew quarters, where they'd made a makeshift medbay.

He ran into Finn halfway there. "Oh, Finn, er, hey."

Finn looked as flustered as Poe felt, his hands fidgeting. "Hey. Um, can we talk?"

"Yeah, of course." Poe had the feeling like they both needed this talk more than either was letting on.

They ducked into a side room, which Han had called his "guest" room. It was pretty bare except for two bunks and a small closet on one side. Poe sat on one bunk, and Finn sat on the other.

"Where should we start?" Poe asked. There was so much he wanted to say, but given the circumstances, he felt it was only fair that Finn start the conversation.

"Well, I just want to get this off my chest." Finn took a deep breath. "Poe, I care about you. More than I've ever really cared about anyone else. I get it if maybe we can't work out. I know you love him. I could see it when you two were knocked out in the med room. You guys looked like you were in serious pain, but the minute we put you in the same room, you reached for each other's hands. It was really just something else, Poe."

Poe had a dark sense of where this was going.

Finn continued, "So . . . I think it'd be best for both of us if I just stepped back. I don't want to get in the way of you and him."

Something in Poe's heart broke at that. "Finn, you're not in anyone's way."

"Yeah, maybe," Finn shrugged. "But I think it's kinda obvious that you're more in love with Ben. I get that. I'm okay with that. I just wanted to let you know that I still care about you, and I hope we can still be friends."

"Of course, Finn," Poe said, letting out a breath he hadn't realized he was holding. "Look, I'm sorry about everything that's happened lately. I . . . I'm sorry."

"I'm sorry, too," Finn replied. "What happened out at the base — I shouldn't have acted like that. I'd like to think that your Ben and Kylo Ren are different, but I still feel uncomfortable seeing his face."

"Finn," Poe pleaded. "Whatever else Kylo Ren has done, to both of us, Ben Solo is good. I know he is. You don't have to like him or anything. Just trust me when I say that he's so different from that monster."

"If they had differenr faces, I'd be more convinced," Finn admitted.

"I know." Poe sighed. "But Ben's with us now. Between the two of you and Luke and Rey, we can finally end the war that created Kylo Ren in the first place. We can all go home."

"Poe, this probably isn't the best time to ask, but how can you trust him so much?" Finn shook his head. "He hurt you in more ways than one. I saw it on the Finalizer. You looked completely broken, and whenever you'd mention Ben's name to me before, I could see all this pain in your eyes. I mean, he may have tried to kill me, but I think he left more scars on you, Poe."

Poe sat in stunned silence, not sure what to say. Finally, he said, "You're right, Finn. He has hurt me. But I hurt him, too. I mean, it doesn't justify the things that either of us have done, but Ben and me, we just go too far back to not forgive each other. I . . . I hope you can understand, Finn."

Finn hesitated, then nodded. "I'll try. I just don't want you getting hurt again."

"I won't be," Poe assured him. "Ben won't hurt me here."