Bless the broken road Chapter 38, a home & away fanfic

Thanks again for all of your wonderful reviews! Here's another update...I feel kind of bad for giving them so much angst to deal with so I'm gonna change that really soon! Hope y'all enjoy this chapter...

Chapter 38

Ruby padded slowly towards Charlie's bedroom door with a steaming cup of coffee in her hands and tapped lightly on the door "Charlie?" when she received no answer she sighed to herself and entered the room "Charlie?!"

"Go 'Way" Charlie mumbled from where she had buried herself completely under the covers.

Ruby released a sigh and set the coffee on the nightstand "Charlie, you need to get up!" she gazed expectantly down at the older girl hidden under the covers but when she merely received an annoyed grunt she pulled the covers back off her.

"Ruuuby!" Charlie groaned as she turned over and buried her face in her pillow "Leave me alone!" when Ruby didn't answer her and remained standing over her Charlie finally looked up at her "Ruby..."

"I'm not leaving you alone when you're in this state" Ruby plopped down onto the bed next to Charlie "Now drink..." she took the cup from the bedside table and offered it to Charlie.

Charlie sat up in the bed and accepted the cup, if only to keep Ruby from worrying too much about her. She sipped tentatively at the hot liquid before she lowered it and turned her gaze to her hands "I'm a mess"

"You're not a..." when Charlie looked at her incredulously Ruby changed her statement slightly "Okay, maybe you are a little bit of a mess" she wrapped her arm comfortingly around Charlie's shoulders "But that's completely understandable in the situation. I'm having a bit of trouble with it myself"

Charlie leaned slightly into her daughter "I'm sorry Rubz. I'm being totally selfish just sitting around here moping all day..."

"Hey" Ruby nudged Charlie lightly and leaned her head against the older girls where it rested on her shoulder "You have every right to be upset right now Charlie. I'm not going pretend that I know what you're going through but...If you need me I'm here for you. If you need to yell go ahead and yell, if you need to cry I'm right here and if you need to talk you can. I'm not going anywhere"

As if on cue Charlie released a shuddery breath "You know if you say things like that you might actually make me start crying again"

"You can if you need to" Ruby shrugged "Anything you need...I'm right here honestly"

"I don't understand this" Charlie murmured softly, sadness seeping into her voice "I don't understand why she doesn't want to be with me anymore...Do you think I did something Rubz?"

"No" Ruby replied instantly "You didn't do anything Charlie. Joey said that she was protecting you or something..."

"Wait...How do you know that?!" Charlie straightened up and gazed at Ruby in surprise "Did she tell you that she was going to leave me?" there was no anger in her voice only a sadness that caused Ruby to wince.

"No...I read the letter. I told you that remember? Don't you think that if I knew Joey was planning on leaving that I would have done something?!"

"Yeah..." Charlie sighed and ran a hand irritably through her slightly messy hair "Sorry Rubz. I'm just...So confused"

"I know" Ruby placed a hand comfortingly on Charlie's arm "its okay"

"Did you notice that she was acting weird at all?" Charlie asked softly "Before you left for school?"

"When I think about it..." Ruby bit her lip in contemplation "She did seem really upset. She said that she loves us and that everything she does is to try to protect us. That it's her main priority. Then she thanked me for accepting her and she...Made sure that I would look after you"

"Oh..." Charlie's shoulders slumped slightly in defeat "I guess that means she's not planning on coming back anytime soon than"

Ruby remained silent unsure of how to respond to the statement.

"I don't understand this..." Charlie murmured quietly "I don't understand how she could just leave me after all that we've been through together. She says that she still loves me but...If she loved me wouldn't she still be here?"

"Maybe you should read the letter" Ruby said cautiously "It might explain why she did what she did..."

"No" Charlie immediately shook her head "I don't want to read it" she looked over at the letter with her name on, lying on the bedside table.

"But Charlie..."

"I don't know what to do" Charlie interrupted her voice growing clogged with tears "It's like she just expects me to let her go like...Like I don't Love her with all my heart!"

"Well than don't accept it" Ruby said quietly "Do you remember what I said when Joey was leaving?" she stopped but continued speaking at Charlie's blank stare "Fight for her Charlie! Don't let her go without a fight..."

"She doesn't want to be fought for" Charlie whispered sadly as her gaze dropped once again to her lap "She doesn't want to be found Rubz...There's nothing I can do..."

"There has to be something!" Ruby insisted.

Charlie shook her head causing her unshed tears to flow down her cheeks "We were meant to be getting married...And she just left me!"

"If Joey thought that by leaving you she was protecting you, I'm sure there's a good reason" Ruby offered softly.

"I told her the charges had been dropped" Charlie said quietly "I told her that it would be okay, but she left anyway. Maybe the whole 'protecting me' thing was just because she wanted to leave me..."

"Joey loves you!" Ruby pointed out strongly "You know that she does Charlie..."

"Obviously not enough!" Charlie snapped. After a moment of silence she reached for Ruby's hand and held it lightly "Sorry Ruby. I didn't mean to yell at you. I didn't even mean to..."

"What?" Ruby squeezed Charlie's hand urging her to continue.

"I said that Joey doesn't love me" Charlie said tearfully "And now I feel guilty for saying it and I feel terrible because I'm suddenly wondering if she does love me"

"Charlz..."

"I need her" Charlie said despairingly "I need her here with me Ruby...I just don't know what to do. I feel so lost and confused and it HURTS!"

"I know" Ruby said sadly, tears glazing over her own eyes.

"It sounds stupid..." Charlie laughed tearfully as she released Ruby's hand and pulled her knees to her chest wrapping her arms securely around them "But I honestly thought that nothing would ever make Joey leave me again. That our relationship was indestructible because we loved each other. I guess I was wrong..."

"Maybe you should just..."

"I'm not reading the letter" Charlie sighed and leaned her head on her knees.

"Why not?" Ruby questioned in confusion "I don't understand why you don't want to know why she left..."

"If I open that letter and I find out that she's never planning on coming back...I don't know what I'll do" Charlie whispered.

"It could be important" the younger girl pointed out.

"I don't care" Charlie shrugged listlessly "I don't want to read it..." they fell into silence for a moment.

"So are you going to get up?" Ruby asked quietly.

Charlie nodded in response.

"Good!" Ruby exclaimed "Why don't we go to the diner?"

"I don't think that's a good idea" Charlie responded "I don't really feel like going out today. Anyways I look a mess"

"You look fine!" Ruby argued "Come on Charlie, you haven't been out or even eaten for over a week. You're really worrying me and...If you don't mind me saying if you stay inside any longer you will look a mess. Repeat after me...Sunlight is gooood. You need UV Rays and Food stat! I'm sure Rachel would agree with me"

Charlie offered her daughter a small smile "Look Rubz I know you're trying to make me feel better and just looking after me bu..."

"I won't take no for an answer!" Ruby stood from the bed and gazed pleadingly at the older girl "Pleaaase Charlie?"

"Fine" Charlie conceded after a moment of being subjected to the puppy dog look "But not for very long and I need to shower and stuff first"

"Then you better go do that!" Ruby smiled "We leave in half an hour!"

---

"See?" Ruby smiled as they walked out of the diner "Don't you feel better?" she linked her arm with the older girl's as they walked.

Charlie hesitated to answer. On a physical level she did feel slightly better but emotionally she felt worse.

"Yeah" she finally nodded "A little bit..."

"She might come back yet" Ruby said quietly as she noticed the sadness in Charlie's voice "She could realise that what you two have is worth fighting for."

"I hope so" Charlie said softly "I just...I wish I knew where she was..."

"HEY!" a male voice yelled suddenly "CHARLIE!"

Charlie stopped and turned around to see who was shouting to her. Her expression immediately dropped when she noticed that Hugo was jogging towards her "This is just what I need today..."

"Hey" Hugo said softly as he stopped at their side "Can you give us a minute Ruby?" he kept his eyes trained on Charlie.

Ruby looked at Charlie questioningly. When Charlie nodded the teenager motioned a short distance away "I'll just be over there...Just yell if you need me, okay?"

"Okay" Charlie nodded. She watched as her daughter walked away before she turned back to Hugo "What do you want Hugo?"

"I just wanted to see if you're okay" Hugo answered innocently "I heard that Joey broke up with you and I thought..."

"Where did you hear that?" Charlie asked in shock. The only people who knew about the break up apart from herself and Joey were Ruby and Aden. Neither of whom were the type of people to gossip.

"Word gets around town fast" Hugo shrugged "I guess somebody must have known..."

"Oh..." Charlie sighed and looked over Hugo's shoulder to see Aden talking to Ruby a short distance away "I'm coping...Was that all you wanted...?"

"Well not really" Hugo shrugged and shoved his hands into his pockets "I was kind of wondering if you wanted to go out sometime...Since you're not dating Joey anymore"

Charlie gaped at him in shock "Are you kidding me? You actually think I would want to go out with anyone, let alone you just after I've broken up with my Fiancé?!"

"Well I knew that the two of you weren't going to last" Hugo said defensively "So I don't see what difference it would make really. I mean she was just an experiment, right? You were just waiting for the right ma...?" he was cut off as Charlie lost control of her emotions and punched him hard.

"IT'S NARROW MINDED BASTARDS LIKE YOU AND HER BROTHER WHO CAUSED HER TO LEAVE ME!" She yelled angrily as she shoved him backwards.

"What..." Hugo stared at her in shock as she advanced on him "Charlie..."

"SHUT UP!" Charlie yelled tearfully "If it wasn't for people like you I would still be with her..." she threw another punch which Hugo narrowly stepped out of the way of.

Suddenly she felt strong arms wrap around her waist and she struggled valiantly against them "LET ME GO!"

"Charlie..." Aden said calmly into her ear "You have to calm down. You know you can't do this. It's not all his fault..."

"It is!" Charlie turned around in the man's hold to face him "It is Aden. Let me go!" she attempted to push him backwards but he held on tightly, refusing the release her.

"LET ME GO!" Charlie sobbed uncontrollably as she hammered weakly against Aden's chest with her fists "Aden..."

"I'm not letting you go" Aden said softly. After a moment Charlie fell fully into Aden's embrace and they sank to the ground together.

"It's okay..." Aden said softly.

"I didn't mean to..." Hugo started guiltily "I was just..."

"Get out of here!" Ruby said angrily from where she had knelt on the ground next to Charlie and Aden.

Hugo didn't move and Aden looked up at him angrily "You heard what she said...GO!" Hugo rushed off quickly with only a fleeting look back.

Aden refocused on the sobbing girl in his arms and he tightened his embrace. He glanced to his left at Ruby who appeared just as tearful and he pulled her close to him with his free arm.

---

"Do you think she'll be okay?" Aden asked anxiously as he watched Charlie rush to her bedroom. He turned back to Ruby who had sat down on the couch.

"I don't know" Ruby said sadly "I hope so...Have you found Joey yet?"

"Not yet" Aden dropped down on the couch next to her "It's like she doesn't want to be found Ruby. I don't know what's going on..."

"Joey seems to think that she's protecting us from something" Ruby responded softly "But...I think it's hurting us more that she's not here than anything else could" she looked up at Aden and shrugged tearfully "I don't know..."

"I'll find her" Aden said quietly as he wrapped an arm around Ruby's shoulders "I'll make sure of it..."

---

Charlie slumped down onto her bed and pressed play on Joey's IPod which was still connected to the dock. She inhaled deeply when she realised which song had begun to play and reached for Joey's letter slowly. She gazed intently at it for a moment before she opened the envelope carefully and pulled the letter out.

I didn't hear you leave

I wonder how am I still here,

And I don't want to move a thing,

It might change my memory,

Charlie,

I know that if you're reading this you've probably realised that I've left. Please don't think that I'm leaving because I don't love you anymore. On the contrary, I love you too much...Too much to allow either you or Ruby to be hurt because of me or my so-called 'Family'. I have to do this...To protect you. I know how much this will be hurting you but I can't let Brett do any more damage than he already has. Remember that I love now and always and that I would give anything to be with you...Anything but your safety and well being.

Love,

Joey

Oh I am what I am,

I'll do what I want,

But I can't hide,

And I won't go,

I won't sleep,

I can't breathe until you're resting here with me,

And I won't leave,

I can't hide,

I cannot be until you're resting here with me,

Charlie pulled Joey's pillow into her arms and buried her face in it, inhaling the lingering scent of her girlfriend as tears rolled relentlessly down her cheeks and images filled her head.

I don't want to call my friends,

For they might wake me from this dream,

And I can't leave this bed,

Risk forgetting all that's been

"Joey?" Charlie questioned when she felt a wetness on her stomach "Are you okay?" she gently pulled Joey back up to her and wiped tenderly at her falling tears "Why are you crying?"

"It doesn't matter right now" Joey leaned down and pressed a soft teary kiss to Charlie's lips "Tonight is all that matters..." she gazed intently into Charlie's bright blue eyes "Have I ever told you that when I look into your eyes I feel like I could get lost in them?"

"No" Charlie gasped as Joey's hand neared her centre "I don't think..." she gasped and arched into the touch when Joey finally pressed a light pressure to her "...So"

"And have I ever told you that I love you more than words can even say?" Joey asked her tears still falling rapidly "That I'll never love anyone like I love you?"

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