Hi everyone! Hope you had a nice weekend. Here's something to start the week with. Remember to review!

"What's wrong, Grant, your food not interesting enough for you?" Sorren asked.

O'Shea shook his head. "No. Have either of you seen Fiona?"

"There was an incident down in Engineering," West replied.

"Oh, okay." O'Shea shrugged and turned his attention to his lunch.

Sorren looked up. "Is it just me, or are there fewer people in here than usual?"

The other two looked around. "Yeah, it does seem kind of… empty," O'Shea said.

"I wonder where everyone is," West muttered.

Sorren held his PADD in place as it tried to buzz across the table. "Well, at least I'm getting the Rules again!"

741a. *Do not put huge springs in the Captain's chair. He does not appreciate being bounced and thrown into the air, especially when he doesn't expect it.

741b. For those of you who can't resist, we do have video of this.

(741c. See Rule #759a.)

742. If you find something funny, don't leave the rest of us in the dark about it.

(742b. See Rule #759a.)

743. *Chekov does not have a brother named Petor.

(743b. See Rule #759a.)

744. Dr. McCoy does not have "mad ninja reflexes".

(744b. See Rule #759a.)

745. *Stop calling Mr. Scott "MacGyver". Honestly, he's about ready to beat the next person who calls him that over the head with his bagpipes.

(745b. See Rule #759a.)

746. Snuggies are not appropriate to wear while on duty.

(746b. See Rule #759a.)

747. *You cannot request a beam up by saying "Beam me up hottie!" even if Scotty kind of likes it, the other transporter operators are not huge fans.

(747b. See Rule #759a.)

748. *The Enterprise does not have Stasis Chambers, stop asking.

(748b. See Rule #759a.)

749. When making homemade music videos, please keep it classy with the music and content.

(749b. See Rule #759a.)

750a. *Don't walk up to people and expect a random puzzle.

750b. This includes Mr. Spock (even though most would say he's a puzzle himself).

(750c. See Rule #759a.)

751. "All roads lead to Rome" does not apply when you are on another planet.

(751b. See Rule #759a.)

752. *Do not sneak onto a Klingon or Romulan ship and write "Kilroy was here" on the walls.

(752b. See Rule #759a.)

753a. Look, we get it already. We know that no one expects the Spanish Inquisition. We're getting tired of you bursting into rooms reminding us of this.

753b. By the way, Dr. McCoy has made it clear that the next time you do that in Sickbay, he will make you regret it.

(753c. See Rule #759a.)

754. Who told Chekov that Celfary live on the moon?

(754b. See Rule #759a.)

755. Stop calling Spock "Zeno".

(755b. See Rule #759a.)

756. You cannot play the "Peter Gunn Theme" over the speakers as the ship is sent into warp.

(756b. See Rule #759a.)

757. *Would one of you computer techs please remove the rootkit virus that keeps re-programming the scanner read-outs. Spinning holograms of paper air planes are NOT useful!

(757b. See Rule #759a.)

758. Next time we find something like this floating around in space (http:/ /images. wikia. com/half -life/ en/ima ges/3/3 d/Space ), do not beam it aboard, no matter what Mr. Spock or the Captain or anybody says.

(758b. See Rule #759a.)

759a. Writing out the same sentence over and over is not an approved punishment and I will no longer use it as a punishment.

759b. Stop it. Who's idea was this? Are you trying to make our job harder?

760. I will not write out the same sentence on the Official List of Unofficial Rules…

"Hey, something else is missing in here," West said as they finished reading.

"What?" O'Shea and Sorren looked around.

"That pirate flag in the corner," West replied.

"Great," Sorren sighed. "That means someone is coming to visit."

Rule #741a is from Beloved Daughter, #743 was suggested by someone, please raise thy hand so I can give credit, #745 is from Addonex, The Great Space Hobo is responsible for #747, #748 is by Jason Kardom, #750a is from Mosstail-Jaywing, #752 is from LuvDanceGirl, and #757 is by Werepanther33. Thank you!