The deafening honks and blares behind Arthur remind him that the traffic ahead of him has dispersed and it's his turn to move the car forward. But he's been concentrating on Gwen far too long to realize that, and in the end, he faces the wrath of the drivers behind him. Arthur turns back and notices the stack of cars lining up and immediately moves the car ahead. But instead of driving away, he brings the car to the side of the road and allows the cars behind him to pass him by. But the drivers, instead of being grateful, verbally abuse Arthur as they pass. Not that it matters so much to him because Arthur is busily concentrating on Guinevere, sitting down beside Morgana, deeply engaged in a conversation. She looks happy, Arthur thinks. 'Why not? She had millions to spend without sweating for it and anyone in her shoes will feel delighted about it' he thinks bitterly. Still looking much the same, she is wearing sunglasses to shield from the morning sun and her hair is trimmed slightly shorter than it was the last time he saw her. Apart from that, she looks her gorgeous self.
Another honk jars Arthur and he straightens himself on the seat. He taps his fingers against the steering wheel and thinks quickly. 'Should I go and talk to her?' he ponders. He looks quickly at his watch and remembers the appointment he has with Reagan. But his heart really wants to go and speak to Guinevere. When she dumped him so coldly at the railway station months ago, Arthur was too stunned to speak. He was mystified, and since the rejection stung him badly, he was speechless. But not anymore. He has unfinished business with her and this is his chance. He doesn't know if she's here for good or just visiting; he understands that she had moved permanently in with her brother. So if he doesn't seize his opportunity now, he will never be able to say what he feels in his chest again. Reagan could wait, for now. This is much more important, he decides. Arthur stops the engine, pushes the door open and steps out.
"Are you sure you will be all right, Gwen?" Morgana asks, slinging the bag across her shoulder.
"Morgana, I will be fine."
"No… I mean…"
"How many times do I have to remind you that I don't like hearing this?" Gwen is cross with Morgana's behavior. "When I said I am fine, I am fine. I don't need a babysitter, yeah?"
"Sorry, Gwen, don't get upset with me…"
"I will if you keep asking me the same questions!"
"All right, I won't, I promise. I won't be long… sit tight." Morgana instructs.
"Will do… no one is going to kidnap me here, Morgana, and I was born here, remember?"
"Of course… be back fast," Morgana says and leaves Gwen on her own.
Gwen shakes her head and smiles to herself. "Silly girl," she tells herself and leans against the bench, feeling the sun shine on her face. It feels good to be out in the sun, to be back in Camelot after all these months. She missed Camelot. This is her home, not Carleon. That's Elyan's home. He seems intent in living there forever, but not her, and she made that clear to him. This place holds meaningful memories for her and she will not ignore them, regardless of whether they are good or bad. That's why she took the bold decision to come back to Camelot, even against Elyan's warning. And so far it's been good. Elyan had been worried sick since she arrived; phoning her every hour asking if she's all right. His intentions are good, but it's starting to irk her and she told him if he calls her another time, she would not talk to him again. And it must have worked, because Elyan he hasn't called her in the past six hours.
She sighs sadly. Since she came back, her mind has been wandering off towards Arthur quite a bit. She learned about his recent engagement from Morgana and she actually wishes him well. She knows he'd been hurt by what she did to him and prayed all the time that it wouldn't stop him from finding a new love in his life. And thankfully, he did. This is what she hoped for for Arthur and now she'll be able to breathe easily knowing Arthur is happy with someone else.
"Guinevere?"
Gwen straightens up. Her heart skips a beat at the sound of that voice. A voice she remembers all too well and will never forget, ever, in her lifetime. She'd know Arthur's voice even if she is standing blindfolded in a room filled with people and he's in the furthest corner of the room. She would recognise him anywhere.
"Arthur?" she says, looking up.
"Fancy meeting you here, Guinevere," Arthur says with a smile, his hands firmly in his jeans pockets to restrain from doing anything nasty or unpredictable. He clearly wants to avoid the same mistake he did at the railway station months ago.
"Yeah, fancy that…" she replies, with a smile.
"I thought you left Camelot? Why did you come back?"
"I missed this place."
"Ohh…" Arthur laughs. "I thought you ran out of money," he says teasingly.
"Your father supplied me handsomely, Arthur. You shouldn't be worried about that or me," she replies with equal sarcasm all the while trying to choke back the anguish she feels within her.
"Ouch!" he says and mocks slapping himself, just for the fun of it. "That was sarcastic!"
"I've changed, Arthur, haven't you realized?"
"Oh, Guinevere… that I did, a long time ago… but what I haven't figured out yet is how you can still be so fine and happy after hurting me? Care to share the secret, because I'm such a nice guy, Guinevere, and unfortunately I don't have the cruelty you do. And now that you are here, maybe you can share a pointer or two so that I could make it use of it in the future,"
"You have no use for that, Arthur. You life is set brilliantly ahead for you and you don't need to be cruel to anyone."
"Now, now… that's selfish, Guinevere!" Arthur shakes his finger and his head. "Are you expecting me to be Mr. Nice guy all the time? Do you want me to be trampled and broken by people like you and still do nothing? No, of course not! I have to be prepared too… in case I meet someone like you again in my life."
"I don't think your future wife would be cold like me, Arthur. I heard she's lovely."
"Oh yes, she is. Way better than you are. She's an orphan, just like you, but she has a heart Guinevere… a heart. Do you know what that word means at all? HEART. Spelled H-E-A-R-T. It resides in our body and controls of our actions and feelings? It's a small organ but the most hardworking organ of all, and unfortunately it's missing in you; either that or you've got one that you've never bothered to use. Anyway… Mithian is her name, and I love her very much because she cares for me, Guinevere. She loves me for who I am and is willing to share my pain and my grief. And I am lucky you walked out of my life because I wouldn't have found her then. So, I guess I owe you my thanks."
Those words burn Gwen's heart so badly she wants to stand up and walk away. Or better, she just wants to slap him and blurt out the truth. But she can't because she promised. And she knows Arthur has a bright life waiting for him and she'd feel guilty for life if she ruins it now. No, she will not let the cat out of the bag. Instead she will have to endure the rest of the day listening to Arthur's bitter and heart wrenching sarcasm.
"What happened, Guinevere? Someone clipped your tongue? Usually you have comments waiting to roll out even before I finish my sentences."
"I'm just admiring the person you have turned yourself into," she says with a smile. "Looks like my rejection did turn you into a man after all," she adds, looking away. Her eyes feel moist, but she is glad she has the shades on to hide the tears.
"And you haven't lost any of your cruelty, Guinevere!" Arthur replies through his clenched teeth. Blood boils inside but he is trying to keep calm because he knows what'll erupt if he lets himself loose. Guinevere hasn't changed a bit. She's still the same old bitch she'd been months ago.
"Look, Arthur… Is this why you are here? To flare your temper at me?" Gwen asks and feigns a yawn. "If you think your scorned remarks and taunts are going to put me off, then you're absolutely wrong there. Nothing you say will have any affect on me."
"Why? Am I holding you back from something, or are you waiting for someone?"
"Does it matter if I am?"
"Curiosity killed the cat… just dying to know who your next victim is."
"I think you better take care of your life, Arthur, and leave me to handle mine. I'm done with you and I definitely don't need any advice from a fool like yourself."
"Ahhh… strong words, I see, Guinevere. Don't flatter yourself too much because one day you're doomed to be discovered and the results won't be very promising." Arthur replies, looking straight down at her though she has her head bowed. "At least look at me when I speak to you, Guinevere… be brave enough to face your victim. Or is it guilt that plagues your heart so that you can't even meet my eyes?"
"I don't have time for this, Arthur… speak whatever you want, and do so quickly. But remember, it will not do me any harm. I will live my life as I choose and I need no advice from you. Or anyone at all," Gwen finishes.
"Is everything all right, Gwen?" Morgana rushes to her friend's aid and looks horrifyingly at Arthur and then at Gwen.
Arthur looks up at Morgana and arches his brow. "Ahh, Morgana! Sidekick to the grand mistress herself. How are you?"
"Arthur?" Morgana is petrified.
"Surprised to see me, Morgana? Or stunned to see me well?" Arthur asks her, squaring his shoulder. "After all that your friend did to me, you probably didn't expect me to carry on living, did you?"
"No Arthur, that's not true. I've actually been keeping tabs on you and…"
"And passed the information to your friend here, how convenient!"
"What is your bloody problem, Arthur? Your fight is with me, not Morgana. If you need to take your anger on someone, let it be me! Not her… understand?" Gwen's temper flares.
Arthur turns back his attention onto Gwen. "Nice. Friend supporting her accomplice. She's part of your well worked plan too, Guinevere, so how can I trust her? She benefitted from me as did you."
"She isn't part of anything, Arthur!"
"No, she has my money too, Guinevere, have you forgotten that? She turned rich thanks to you so how can I EVEN trust her!" Arthur whacks the empty air in front him, channeling his anger through. He turns back towards Morgana. "How did you spend your money, Morgana? Did you lie to drain the money from me or was your sister really in grave danger? Hmmm… which one was it?"
"Arthur, I think you've got this all wrong. Actually…"
"MORGANA!" Gwen's sharp voice alarms Morgana and she stops midway in her sentence.
"HAHAHA!" Arthur laughs bitterly. "So… there is something fishy after all. Just as I thought! Morgana? How could you? Guinevere…" he points at Gwen and shakes his head, "I can understand, but you?" he asks Morgana. "I didn't do you any harm! I hardly knew you, and yet… you fooled me with your pathetic story and stole my money. Why? Why did you have to become such a low-grade bitch just so you can have my money?"
"ARTHUR PENDRAGON!" Gwen shouts as she gets up on her feet. "One more word about my friend, and…"
"And what, Guinevere?" Arthur challenges her.
"Gwen, please, no… please!" Morgana says as she chokes back her tears. Arthur's words cuts through her like a knife and despite the hurt, she can't rectify the situation. Because of a promise. A promise she made to Gwen when she visited her friend in Carleon after a week she saw Gwen off. She and Elyan both learned the truth and Gwen made both of them promise that they will not reveal anything to Arthur, no matter how bad the situation may get.
"What will you do?" he asks again, stepping closer toward Gwen.
Arthur's aftershave pierces her nostrils, yet Gwen restrains herself from touching him. She keeps her hands to her side and waits, trying to calm herself. Fighting and further bickering will not do either them any good, and Gwen desperately needs Arthur to leave. But he will not if she keeps answering his questions. The best thing at the moment is to accept defeat, shoulder some scorn that will be shot her way and watch him leave. At least that will make him leave.
"I asked you a question, Guinevere."
"I haven't got the time for you, Arthur Pendragon. Look… what I did was wrong, but I'm not sorry. Will never be, so get your life back on track… wait, you already have. Good… now, back off mine!" Gwen starts to move but Arthur grabs her hand and halts her.
"Arthur, please!" Morgana rushes to them but Arthur stops her with a piercing look. She stops but looks on worriedly.
"You're hurting me, Arthur," Gwen answers him calmly.
"You have no idea what hurt feels like, Guinevere. You hure me, remember? Would you like to know how it feels?"
Gwen knows her plan isn't working. No matter how quiet she is, Arthur keeps coming back at her. She has to try another way to chase him off. What should she do? Gwen thinks quickly. There is a way but it will require her to hurt him again. But it seems the only plan that'll work for her now. If she doesn't do this, Arthur's going to spend all day bickering with her. And she can't have that. So it's this or she'll be stuck with him for today. "Does your father know you are here, Arthur? That you are threatening me?"
"Why, so you can milk more money from him?"
"Trust me, love, the thought did run through my mind as soon as I heard your voice."
"And what's stopping you?"
"My conscience…"
"You have one?" he laughs, gripping her tight. "I'm surprised!"
"Honey, there is a lot more you don't know about me, so don't start. I can milk more money from your father if I need to, but the … that'll probably rob his good life from him, and I definitely don't need the blame for causing his downfall or… best, his death!"
"What are you saying?"
"Look, your father and I… we made a deal. I would take the money and leave your life, and he promised to leave me be as well. But if you choose to come to me, then your father will have to start to pay again, just for me to leave you. He was fine with that deal, but unfortunately, he forgot to tell you!"
"You… you…!" Arthur clenches his cheek in anger.
"Why did you think I came back? Why do you think I entertained you all this while? I need the money, Arthur… I've used up all that I have and I need some more. I knew for certain you'd come running back to me when you spotted me, and bingo! You did just that… and now I'll use this excuse to get more money from your father, and I think he'll be very generous with it."
"How could you…"
"I told you, Arthur: I haven't changed and I never will. I just need the money and I am willing to do anything for it! Anything…" she doesn't get to finish her sentence as a hand comes flying against her cheek, sending her crashing on the ground.
"Gwen!" Morgana rushes to her but Arthur grabs Morgana by the waist, holding her tightly. "What are you doing, Arthur? Let me go!" Morgana struggles against Arthur's strong grip.
Gwen's sunglasses fall off, skidding out of her reach because of her heavy crash. As the pain creeps up to her cheek, another pain finds its way to her eyes. Her head throbs and she shuts her eyes to ease the pain in her head. She needs the shades yet she doesn't know where they are. She feels dizzy and her throat feels dry. The headache grows nastier every minute and she knows she will have to do what she planned not to do in anyone's presence, especially Arthur's. She collects herself, kneels and starts searching for her shades, feeling the ground with her bare hands. Like a blind person.
"What the…" Arthur lets Morgana go and the latter rushes towards Gwen and helps her find her sunglasses and puts them back on for her friend.
"Morgana?" Arthur's voice pauses as he refuses to believe what he just witnessed. "Is she…"
"Come on Gwen, let's get out of here!" Morgana helps Gwen up but Arthur hurries to them, stopping them with his arms extended.
"What do you want, Arthur? Haven't you caused enough damage?" Morgana asks angrily. She tries to walk past, but Arthur's outstretched hand stops them.
"Wait a minute! What…" he finds words hard to come by. "What's wrong with Guinevere? Why is she wearing those sunglasses? And what… why did she… why did she…"
"Nothing… come on, Morgana!"
"NO!" he grabs Gwen and pushes Morgana away. "I want to know what happened to you? Why couldn't you find your glasses. Why are you even wearing them? Tell me…" he shakes her.
"Arthur! You are hurting her!" Morgana tries to peel his hands off her but he pushes her off again.
"Look at me, Guinevere! Look at me when I talk!" he says and pulls her shades off and tosses them aside. "Look at me!" he shouts.
"I can't, Arthur! Leave me…"
"Why?" he asks again, shouting in her face. And Gwen has enough of it.
"Because I'm blind!" Gwen shouts back at him.
Arthur releases her and staggers back while Gwen has to rely on Morgana to keep her balance still. "What are you saying?" he asks, not believing her words. "What madness is this?"
"She's suffering from fleeting blindness Arthur. It's called Conversion Disorder. It's a temporary blindness, and doctors said she shouldn't suffer any mental stress or anxiety until it goes away. It will not take time but she must not undergo stress for the time being," Morgana explains.
'Guinevere is blind?' he thinks aloud. He can hardly believe what he hears. Surely there has to be some mistake. She can't be blind? Or is she? "You're blind?" Arthur repeats the phrase again and looks at Gwen.
Gwen doesn't even know he is looking at her and simply stares ahead, seeing nothing but the familiar black veil obscuring her vision. Morgana nods on Gwen's behalf.
"You're blind," Arthur approaches Gwen and tilts her chin. "Is that why you were looking elsewhere when you spoke, even though I've been standing right in front of you? Is that why you kept dropping your head down, to keep me from finding out? Is that why you wanted to chase me off so that I wouldn't find out?"
"Arthur…" Gwen starts.
"But I did, and you know what," he starts to smile. "I am happy, Guinevere!"
Morgana's eyes widen hearing him but Gwen remains calm. She expected this.
"I am happy you are blind… I am happy you are being punished because of all the cruelty you did to me and my father. Finally… God exists!" Arthur looks up at the sky and smiles, closing his eye. "Finally, justice prevails."
"Arthur, you don't know what…." Morgana starts off but Gwen cuts her first.
"MORGANA!"
"Gwen, he's…"
"ENOUGH!" Gwen shouts at her friend. "No more from you or I'll cut you out from my life as well."
"Yeah, you do that, Guinevere. Isn't that what you are good at? Now, all those things you said a while ago about you coming back for money and that… do they really exist or is it one of your games to divert me from finding about your blindness?"
"They do. I need the money to keep me running until I have my eyesight back. Will you tell your father about our meeting with me or shall I do that myself?" Gwen asks.
Arthur's smile fades. "I hope that you remain blind forever, Guinevere. You are a cruel woman, and I pray, I really pray that you will never regain your eyesight. Then you'll know how it feels to be dependent on others, then you'll know how cheap it is to prey upon the sympathy of others… then you'll know how it feels knowing you're lost. I curse you, Guinevere. I curse the day we met and the day I fell in love with you. I'll go, but I'll go away happily knowing God has punished you for your cruelty. Goodbye!" he says, turns on his heels and leaves them without turning back.
Gwen chokes back her tears. Her head continues to throb and her heart is suffering. Yet there is nothing else she can do at the moment. This is the way they must part and though it hurts, she is glad he left.
"He's gone, Gwen." Morgana informs as she watches the car speeding away, disappearing among the cars on the road.
"I'm sorry, Morgana."
"Why didn't you tell him the truth Gwen? Why are you still lying?"
"He's happy now Morgana. He's engaged. You heard him, he's in love with someone else. How can I shatter his life now? And how can I expect him to return to me considering the situation I am in?"
"Gwen, your blindness is temporary, you heard the doctor. You lost your sight because of the immense emotional and mental stress you've been putting yourself through for this whole month after the incident at the railway station. But you will get it back. Tell Arthur the truth and accept whatever comes from it, Gwen. It pains me to see you like this."
"No, Morgana… that would be betrayal. I will not betray the woman he's going to marry. She has his love and deserves his love. I will not snatch Arthur from her… they are both destined for greater heights together and I will be happy knowing my Arthur is happy somewhere, with someone. That woman, Mithian, right? She will provide him the love I couldn't fulfill. The love I was forbidden from giving him." Tears rolls down Gwen's cheek.
"What about you, Gwen? Have you thought about that?"
"My life will start after I regain my sight, Morgana. I came back to meet Arthur one last time and I did. I just wanted to make sure he's not still pining after me, and I can sleep well tonight knowing he isn't. My task is done, Morgana. My work here is complete. Like I promised Elyan, I will stay with him in Carleon after I regain my sight, but until then, Camelot will be my home."
"Don't do this to yourself, Gwen…"
"It's too late for that now, Morgana. Take me home, will you, and I'm sorry Arthur thinks you're my accomplice. I apologise on his behalf."
"I don't care what he thinks of me, Gwen. His opinion doesn't matter to me. It's you I care for and you I worry about. He can think the worst of me; I don't care. You don't have to apologise for anything. Come on, let's go!" Morgana wipes her own tears and aides Gwen home, holding her by the elbow.
Arthur forgets all about the appointment with Reagan and speeds towards the mansion, to meet his father. He has to tell his father about his meeting with Guinevere and how he managed to hold himself without falling for her again. Arthur wipes the tears that manage to sneak out of his eyes with the back of his hand and accelerates the car, whizzing past the other cars on the road. He is hurt, that's for sure, yet he is happy he finally got to say what's been cooped in his heart all this while. He wants her to feel the same hurt he felt when she left him cold and now she'll understand. She will understand the true meaning of hurt today. She will regret coming back to Camelot. She will regret walking into him.
Arthur slams the steering wheel as hard as he can; venting his frustration. His heart burns. He feels disgusted and he feels sick. Why? He has no idea. He isn't supposed to feel like this at all. He should be rejoicing knowing Guinevere will not be part of his life anymore, yet he isn't. His heart yearns to go back to the park where he has left her. 'Guinevere's blind?' he thinks again as he swerves the car to his right. How did she end up being blind, he wonders. Morgana mentioned something about temporary blindness and stress, but Arthur wonders how it happened.
"Who cares how she got it… she's blind and that alone had made my day!" he laughs to himself and drives ahead. But minutes after that, his smile fades as he feels sick in his stomach. 'How can I laugh at her misery? What sort of a man have I become? Are these the values my mother wants me to have?' he thinks, shaking his head. 'No matter what she'd done to me… I shouldn't have said all those things! I shouldn't have left her alone! Oh, God, I struck her again, too, something I promised I'd never do!' he thinks and brings the car to a sudden halt by the side of the road, almost slamming against the curb. 'God… what have I done?' he thinks and slams his head against the steering wheel. More tears roll down his cheek. He might have spoken bravely to her but he still feels hurt and bitter by the way the events have turned out. He should be happy that he's managed to let Guinevere go from his heart, but he isn't. Has she really left him? No… no she hasn't. He lied to her saying he doesn't love her anymore because he does. And he will always. God, the pain is too much to bear, Arthur thinks sadly as he cries his heart out, leaning and slamming his head against the steering wheel. 'I can't go on with this pain… God, please help me. Help me overcome my pain, my agony and my sadness. I can't go on…' he prays silently. Cars honk as they pass him by but Arthur hears nothing. He can only hear the one name replaying in his mind, 'Guinevere'.
"Arthur?" Merlin calls as he enters the mansion in a hurry. He looks worried as he jogs around the spacious rooms, looking for his friend. He received a phone call from Arthur an hour ago asking him to meet Arthur at his home. Arthur sounded pretty bad and had Merlin worried. Something must have happened, or Arthur wouldn't have needed his presence.
"Arthur?" Merlin calls out again and almost knocks Geoffrey off his feet.
"Oi, watch it lad…" Geoffrey warns, swinging the tray he holds in his hand away from Merlin.
"Sorry, sorry Geoffrey… have you seen Arthur? I'm looking for him?"
"Master Arthur is in the study."
"Thank you," Merlin smiles at Geoffrey and rushes past him to the study, while Geoffrey makes his way back to the kitchen.
Merlin pushes the heavy study door open and steps inside, looking for Arthur. He finds him, seated on the chair looking out the window. He walks towards Arthur.
"This had better be good, Arthur!" Merlin warns, coming to stand beside the chair.
Arthur looks up at Merlin and the latter notices the tear stained cheek and the swollen eyes of his friend. Merlin's face softens. He kneels beside Arthur's chair.
"Arthur?"
"I saw her today, Merlin," Arthur says softly.
"Who?" Merlin is confused.
"Guinevere!"
Merlin's face beams with happiness. "Gwen? Where? When…?"
"At the park… she was with Morgana," Arthur drops his head and sighs.
"I have to talk to her… I need to see her immediately," Merlin stands up, ready to move but Arthur grabs his friend's hand before Merlin can sprint off. Merlin looks back at Arthur in confusion.
"She's blind, Merlin."
"WHAT?" Merlin stares down at Arthur. Now it's Merlin's turn to be stunned by the news. He drops back to his knees and looks at Arthur. "What are you saying? What do you mean she's blind?"
"She's blind… she's suffering from some anxiety or something and… she's blind!"
"And you didn't do anything about it?" Merlin asks, surprised Arthur seems calm about it.
"What am I supposed to do Merlin?" Arthur snaps at him. "What do you suggest?"
"Anything… I don't know! Bring her to a specialist, a doctor anything! You just left her there?"
"Things… didn't happen like I wanted, Merlin," Arthur replies and looks away.
"Meaning?"
"We exchanged some nasty words with each other… we fought, pretty bad."
"You threw your words at her Arthur, didn't you?" Merlin accuses angrily. "Just say that you did!"
"Yes… I did, so what?" Arthur shouts back at Merlin angrily. "Why shouldn't I be nasty to her when she did that to me months ago? Why should I be kind to her when she wasn't kind to me? Why Merlin? Why do I have to be one who gives in?"
"Because you still love her, Arthur, that's why." Merlin answers calmly.
"That's ridiculous!" Arthur turns his face away from Merlin.
Merlin reaches out and turns Arthur's face back to face him. "Look at me in the eye and tell me that you don't love her, Arthur!"
"Leave me alone, Merlin!"
"Tell m,e Arthur," Merlin moves to kneel in front of Arthur, forcing the latter to look at him. "Tell me you don't love her and I'll leave you alone, forever. I'll never mention Gwen's name again and I'll stop looking for what happened. Just tell me you don't love her,"
"I… I…." Arthur pushes Merlin's hand, gets up and walks away. He wipes his tears with his hand and goes to stand by the window, digging his fingers hard into the wooden frame.
Merlin stands up and nears his friend. Placing a supportive hand on Arthur's shoulder, he sighs sadly. "You can't, Arthur… I know, and I understand. I know you're heartbroken by her condition and yet you try to put up a brave front here. One look at those eyes tells me everything. You can never deny your love for her, Arthur. No matter what you tell me… I know deep down you still love her."
Arthur sobs, still looking out of the window. He knows Merlin's right, but at the moment his heart just feels painful. He remembers all the bitter exchanges with Guinevere and feels disgusted with the way he behaved with her. She was extremely menacing with her words but that shouldn't give him the reason to behave like he did. Where were his manners? His ethics? He proved to be as cheap as he called her. He sobs more violently now and Merlin wraps his arm around Arthur's shoulder, comforting him.
"It's all right Arthur… It's all right."
"I feel… sick and disgusted with myself Merlin. I…"
"Shhh…. You don't have to tell me if you don't want to…"
"I… don't know what got into me, Merlin. I was angry the moment I saw her, and all of a sudden I started lashing at her. And… she challenged my every word, never giving up. She irked me, pissed me off and… I started to lose control of myself. I… said things I didn't mean Merlin. I spoke… God!" Arthur buries his face with his hands and sobs.
"Arthur, we all make mistakes…"
"I laughed at her, Merlin," Arthur turns around to meet Merlin. "I laughed knowing she's blind! I… God, what have I done? Why have I become such a cruel person?"
"I don't know, Arthur," he answers truthfully. Merlin doesn't know why Arthur behaved like that or what prompted him. But in the heat of the events, both Arthur and Gwen have lost their way.
"I feel ashamed, Merlin. Ashamed of myself!"
"Gwen will forgive you, Arthur," Merlin advises but Arthur steps away from Merlin, his eyes fiery.
"I don't need her forgiveness, Merlin! I don't need anything from her!"
"Arthur, come on…"
"Look Merlin! I don't deny that I love her but the pain she left me with is still fresh. My heart is still bearing the scars and I will not forgive her for what she caused. I feel ashamed for my behavior today but that doesn't mean something will happen between us. No. If that's what you think, then I'm sorry, you'll be terribly disappointed. She and I are miles apart now and she's nothing more than my nightmare and bitter memories. I don't want to have anything to do with her anymore. I'm just sick and tired by the way the events unfolded today but… tomorrow, I will forget all this. I have a life, Merlin, and I choose to stick to that!"
"You love her, yet you don't want to forgive her. You feel sad for hurting her, yet you refuse to be drawn back to her anymore. You want to start a new life, but you still can't forget Gwen. Arthur, do you think I'm an idiot or are you saying you're turning into a fool?" Merlin asks, his hands on his hips as he looks straight at Arthur.
Arthur remains silent.
"Look… let's just say I'm an idiot for a while, yeah. So…" Merlin licks his lips and sighs. "Let's say that you have decided on giving yourself a chance with Mithian. Tell me honestly, Arthur… will you be able to make her happy? Will you be able to love her?"
"That is not the…"
"I'm not finished here, Arthur. You will shower her with all the jewels and gold in the world, but let's say she asks you to give her the one thing she craves from you, your heart. What will you do, Arthur? Will you lie your way out, or will you give it to her knowing you're cheating her. Or will you tell her the truth and confine her in an unhappy marriage till you both age and die! Which one will it be? I'm sorry mate, I just have to know… I am, after all, the idiot here!"
"Merlin, please… don't do this to me!"
"Why Arthur? I'm preparing you for your marriage and this is one question you need to ask yourself before you slip that ring onto Mithian's finger. Will you or will you not? It's a simple question, Arthur," Merlin says, still calm despite the heat of the question.
Arthur remains silent.
"Well… since you are silent, I take it as a positive answer. Let me tell you what this idiot feels. I think you and Gwen are the real idiots here. Because someone, yes, someone has laid a trap for both of you and you walked into it without realising the consequences of it. And that someone is handsomely benefiting from the trap while you and Gwen are suffering. Look, Arthur. I'm saying this again and I don't care if you wish to hear it. I think Gwen's lying to you."
"WHAT?" Arthur shoots him a fierce look.
"She loves you, Arthur, very much. I saw that in her eyes after you left and I realized she was suffering from the same pain as you. Something made her deny it, and today, like you, she put up a brave front and acted her way of the mess, but I'm not buying any of this shit! Something still smells fishy and you should have started with Reagan today. That man holds more secrets than anyone else for your father and though I've no proof, I still think your father is behind this, Arthur!"
"MERLIN!" Arthur grabs Merlin's collar angrily.
"Calm yourself, Arthur," Merlin casually peels Arthur's fingers from his collar. "Don't you feel it's a tad suspicious that your father turned over a new leaf suddenly and unquestioningly accepted Gwen into the family, despite the mess with Elana? And after that, things start to go nasty for her and you? And how persuasive he's been in asking you to forget Gwen when before he'd been so encouraging? Come on, Arthur… you're smarter than that!" Merlin says.
Arthur turns away from Merlin and thinks.
"How did the money you promised Gwen was intercepted by your father and later, he transfers the same amount to Morgana? Why was he so insistent on helping Gwen when it was your help she sought out? What did it mean to him? Why? Aren't you curious about this, Arthur? I am… I really am!"
Arthur backs away until he feels the table behind him and stops, grabbing the edge of the table for balance. Merlin's information starts to creep up his brain and finally starts to make sense.
"I don't know what else I can say to make you see the sense of this issue, Arthur," Merlin sighs and looks around the room. "But I know one thing: you and Gwen are destined for each other. Nothing or no one can come in between the two of you. No one! All this… I believe it's your test, Arthur, and in time, you will be rewarded. So will Gwen. But please, don't be hasty in deciding your future, Arthur. Think! Please… let your heart decide. This is your life and you only get one chance. Don't ruin it, please! The fates of the lives of two women are in your hands, and the decision is up to you Arthur. This is all I can say." And with that Merlin turns around and leaves the room.
Arthur staggers towards the chair and slumps down, burying his face in his hands. Someone clears his throat. He looks up. Geoffrey stands by the door, looking at him sadly.
"Geoffrey?"
"Master Arthur… may I speak with you?"
"Sure Geoffrey, come in." Arthur stands up and walks up to Geoffrey, holds him by his elbow and leads him inside. "Sit down, Geoffrey," Arthur asks and sits down beside his butler.
"Master Arthur, since your mother's death your father placed you, still an infant, in my hands and told me take care of you. He didn't want to see you because you reminded him too much of your mother and her death that tore him to pieces. But I loved you, nurtured and cared for you like my own son. You became a son I was never privileged with and swore to myself that I'd see your mother wishes came true."
"My mother's wishes?"
"Yes. The lady of the house always had dreams, wishes and hopes for you while you were still in her womb. She spoke to me about her dreams and one of them was that you should marry for love, Arthur. Even though she knew Uther would try to orchestrate a strategic marriage, she wanted you to fall in love and marry the one person who makes you smile. No matter what happens or what others say, she told me she will make sure you hold on to that. And I want you to do that too, Arthur."
"But… I don't understand why… this has anything…" Arthur is confused. He had never heard Geoffrey speak about his mother or heard anything about her. This is all too bizarre for him. Everything today came unplanned and all he feels now is dizzy.
"Guinevere is a fine lady, Arthur and she makes you smile. You love each other, that much is obvious. Please do not let yourself be fooled into an unhappy marriage. Marry for love, Arthur."
"Geoffrey, you know what you are asking, don't you? Guinevere and I have parted ways, and…"
"Arthur…" Geoffrey leans and clasps Arthur's had tightly. "If I don't tell you this now, I will be betraying your mother and I wish not to do that at all. Guinevere loves you, Arthur."
"Geoffrey…"
"No, Arthur. Please listen. She loves you very much and would never hurt you, would never dream of it… but… she didn't leave you of her own wishes. She was made to leave you. She was told to leave you…"
"What?"
"She did what she did because she was told to choose between life and death; she was asked to choose between you or a woman called Morgause, whose life was in grave danger. And she didn't have much choice, Arthur. She did it to save that woman's life, and in the end she had to lose you."
"Wait a minute, Geoffrey… are you saying that Guinevere was tricked? That all that she put up at the station months ago was… an act?"
"Yes," he says sadly. "Everything you heard from her mouth that day was a lie. She merely recited the script, Arthur. And she is hurting from it as much as you are."
"I… I don't… I…" Arthur gets up to his feet and wipes his forehead. His mind is spinning fast and he feels faint. 'Guinevere lied?' he thinks. 'Why?' he thinks again. He turns back to face his butler. "Geoffrey, why? Why did she do this to me and who asked her?"
Geoffrey looks uneasy at the question.
Arthur rushes and kneels by Geoffrey's feet. Clasping his butler's hand in his, he pleads, "Please, Geoffrey… for the love you have for me, please."
"Urmm…" Geoffrey struggles with the answer, struggling with his loyalties.
"Please… for my mother!"
And that does it for Geoffrey. "Guinevere left you because… because your father asked her to! He made her leave you, Arthur. It was he who forced her from your life! You were both pawns in this game, sacrificed to protect the king."