HAKU

As they waded out of the shallows and up the black concrete belly of the empty pool each step brought a wave of pain. By the time they had reached the steps leading to the patio the torrid veil of fog had peeled back leaving him exposed beneath the frigid brooding sky. Beyond the warmth of the main hot spring the puddles had already begun to freeze. It was a little past noon but already it seemed as if dusk was falling. A thin finger of bare blue sky remained on the distant horizon as black, black clouds blew in from the ocean hanging so low he half wondered if he could reach up and touch them. The air smelled strongly of snow. His quick breath bloomed on his lips in a frost plume as his naked skin shivered violently. Haku hung on Suzume almost doubled over in pain clutching his left arm to his chest. They paused at the base of the steps so Haku could catch his breath. His lungs were no longer full of blood but he found himself gasping all the same.

"I should return you to the water."

The hint of pity in the God's voice sparked a flash of fury in Haku's heart. For a moment anger belied his terror.

"No!"

The fox startled at his shout and Haku hastily tempered.

"We are running out of time. It will be here soon and I wish to rejoin the others."

He half expected Suzume to snorted in exasperation and chide him for being stubborn. He was not prepared for the God to hoist him from the ground. Hurriedly he carried him up the stairs. Pale and grim the fox dragged him into the flooded interior of the men's changing room. At once Onsen's anxious mothy presence darkened the rafters. Haku startled as the sliding doors leading to the patio skittered shut without being touched. The radiator along the wall clunked and hissed as it turned on flooding the room with steam as Suzume lowered him to a seat on the bench. The house's disembodied presence circled directly over their heads growing darker and heavier until the beams creaked and moaned. Ignoring the haunted ceiling skirting the puddles on the tiled floor Suzume retreated across the room. Glad for the distance and the modicum of privacy it afforded him, Haku steeled himself to shuck the remnants of his armor one handed.

Carefully he tugged free the sleeve guard ties at his neck, gingerly peeling the gauntlet off his left arm. Pulling the gloved tips from his fingers with his teeth, Haku shed his right gauntlet as well. The skin beneath was wrinkled and clammy with waterlog. Still pressing his injured arm to his chest to avoid working the muscles of his shoulder, unbuckling his sword belt was easier that he thought it would be one handed. Slipping his mask from his brow and shivering out from under his soggy tatter cloak, he set the dragon face beside Hanoane before slinging the dripping length of shadow across the bench. Next he shrugged out of the slashed remains of his gambeson. Tugging the shreds from his waist band, he dropped the remains on the floor. But he was thwarted by the ties on his hip skirt.

They snarled into an impenetrable knot as he tugged on them. Holding the scabbard between his knees, he cut them with an inch of Hanoane's exposed edge. They were useless anyways, nearly crumbling thanks to more than a kiss of strange green fire. As they clattered to the floor Haku gingerly bent to tug loose the lacings of his shin guards and sandals, worming his feet out of crumbling tabi that were mostly ash. Here he blinked frowning at the jewel hanging around his neck gleamed. For a long while he had forgotten it was there. That made him most angry. Closing his good hand over the frozen chain he yanked irritably only to wince.

"How did you come by that?"

Glancing up he found the fox staring askance at the jewel more than unnerved.

"He insists I keep it," Haku muttered sullenly, "I cannot take it off. He will not permit it."

Suzume snorted, knowing exactly to whom Haku was referring.

"After all that has happened, you still quarrel?"

Haku nodded grimly, not wanting to admit he harbored resentment toward Hidé.

"I am forever at odds with the sea. I suppose it is in my nature."

Letting the jewel drop, feeling utterly naked without armor as he found himself bare from waist to ankle save the damp close fitting trousers tightly bound to his middle, he stood with difficulty. Shuffling like an old man to the cabinet where the clean yukata were kept Haku was glad that Suzume had not come to help him. He was not sure he could survive any more shame. Foregoing one of the longer robes that would involve an obi, Haku selected the indigo blue top of a jinbei (1). The interior of the storage board smelled strongly of the thick cedar and camphor plank lining. He lingered in front of the cabinet breathing the soothing scents as Onsen continued to fret over his head.

"It is alright," He murmured quietly while placing a consoling hand on the wall.

But it was not alright. It had never been alright. It would never be alright. All the same, he lied for her benefit. Onsen gave a sullen pop and settled somewhat. Silent and pale as a ghost the God paced the wall of sinks coiling tighter and tighter until Haku could feel the God's anxiety palpably. Still clinging to the cabinet door Haku watched him silently. A single foxfire flickered above his head guttering as it betrayed the fox's turmoil. Loathe to be left behind it darted to catch up each time Suzume turned on his heel. Back and forth he paced like a trapped animal bleaching paler and paler. And a wind kicked up in the God's wake as he continued anxiously. Haku did not startle as suddenly bitter words sprang out of the God like a sprung trap.

"I brought Goshiro, Keiichi, and Kai thinking they could reach Ikiri as Chihiro reached what little remained of your friends inside the Forgotten. But it is not Forgotten! I know not what it is! And now I hesitate to risk the priests and the youngling to things I do not understand."

As usual the fox was not finished even as he lapsed to stillness pinching the bridge of his nose. Gritting sharp teeth Suzume turned his back to hide his shame.

"When Sen asked me the difference between a Forgotten and a Tatarigami I could not answer!"

Haku was surprised by Suzume's open admission of ignorance. Now was not the time to hedge words for pride. Not with what was at stake. But Haku was even more surprised that the fox would ask him for counsel. Turning to regard him askance again the God's gold eyes gleamed with bright appeal.

"I have lived a sheltered life bound to this land. But not you. You have traveled father and seen more of the worlds than any being I know. What do you know of this tatarigami?"

Haku stared at Suzume for a long moment as all the warmth seemed to flee the world. Closing the cabinet, slowly shuffling back to the bench, Haku edged his way back to a seat gritting his teeth against a welling stab of pain in his chest. Worse was the stab of pain in his heart. Gingerly he threaded his injured hand through the sleeve and fumbled with the lacings as he shivered violently. He gave up with the ties as his hands were shaking too much to be dexterous. Shoving Hanoane and his mask into the damp tangle of his tatter cloak Haku forced the wadded threadbare fabric of his soul into the pocket of his trousers. At once he was humming with premonition. It made him sick to his stomach with dread.

Wracking his brain he tried to understand what Urami said. What day had all this begun? Digging deep into his memories and even deeper into the shame of what he had been, Haku searched for answers. Then, as if he had been struck by lightning, Haku remembered. A blast of arctic wind blew out of him in a swirling gust. Understanding hit him like a punch to the shoulder as agony ripped through his heart. Of all the Gods under Onsen's roof Haku understood Tatarigami better than any. Earlier this day he had looked the demon in the face. What was worse, she had looked back and saw herself in him. And now Haku remembered why.

"What is it, Nigihayami!?"

He startled once more as he found the fox standing over him flustered with worry. Haku could not lie. He never could lie. So in a hush he revealed the worst of himself.

"There was a day not long after I found my way here that Ikiri taunted me with Hidé's affection for Chihiro. Do you remember what happened, Suzume-san?" (2)

Haku was startled by the calm in voice as he whispered the next.

"I make no excuses for myself. I begrudged Ikiri so much in that moment the emotion came alive. It broke free and crept down into the house to punish Ikiri for her spite and cruelty. The demon I set free would have killed both Ikiri and Chihiro had you not intervened. That day you called it hate but it has another name. Urami: resentment."

It was obvious from Suzume's strained expression that the fox also remembered. But the bright gleam of confusion in the fox's eyes made it clear that he did not yet understand. It was strange to discover the gaps of insight Kami experienced with regard to emotion. They were strangely immune to certain moods. But then again, acrimony, jealousy, and guilt were uniquely human sentiments. And with these Haku had become intimately acquainted. So he explained for the God's benefit.

"To suffer so strongly that you are lost inside that suffering: this is how Forgotten are born. Urami is similar. Urami is born of suffering like the Forgotten. But here is the difference. Unlike the Forgotten, Urami does not lose itself. Instead of being consumed, Urami consumes. Urami feeds on suffering and grows stronger and strong so that one day it can return the same suffering and more to those who have wronged it."

A chilling wind blew out of him ominously and the foxfire over Suzume's head flickered.

"You are fire, Suzume-san, and so you bend fire to your will. I am wind and water, so I bend these to my will. Urami is retribution and so it bends violence to its will. What is more, it returns that violence in kind with interest."

Haku flattened a shaking hand on his chest where Urami almost killed him.

"That is how it turned back my arrow. That is how it turned back Sen's bells. That is how it turned back the very sea when Sengen attempted to drown it earlier today."

Haku looked up at miserably as the God took a step away from him unconsciously. Finally understanding dawned on Suzume and it eclipsed him entirely. The foxfire of his heat extinguished in a hissing puff of smoke. And his grim face twisted into a mask of utter terror as he choked the words.

"O-Inari-sama have mercy!"

Haku almost laughed out loud at the painful swell of hostility that rose in his chest. The worlds held no mercy for any of them Kami or human! And bitterly he produced the most terrible of truths.

"Urami turns back on itself as well, Suzume-san. That is why what I unleashed that day tried to kill Chirhio. That is why it killed Amano. It hates itself most of all, because in the end, it alone is responsible for its continued suffering."

Suddenly dizzy as if the world was spinning he found himself fading. Haku did not realize he had slipped forward off the bench until Suzume caught him. Suddenly the fox yanked him upright, Haku cringed over his arm. Still treating him like a child, Suzume roughly tied the ties of the jinbei. With a beckoning flick of his wrist the God called Onsen to his service. Phantom hands whisked an indigo apron out of the cabinet. Without hesitation, and belying much experience, Suzume used it to create a sling for Haku's injured arm. Marveling at the God's skill the question slipped from him unbidden.

"How is it you know so much about healing?"

Suzume pulled a sullen moue that did not match his words.

"O-Inari-sama cherishes all life."

Haku's mouth quirked sardonically. But it fell open as the God sat back on his heels and barked an impossible order.

"We will subdue this Urami!"

Haku stared and worked his mouth uselessly.

"You cannot subdue it. Violence is useless against it."

Crossing his arms in exasperation Suzume growled at him as if he was stupid.

"Then find another way beyond violence."

Seething in bitter silence Haku opened his mouth to say unkind things. What other way was there in these worlds except violence?! But then he heard the distant muffled peal of bells. Summoned by the humming power of song, his insides lurched and shivered. Unconsciously he rose onto his knees looking toward the main house in rapt attention as his insides hummed with premonition. Tossing up his good hand to silence the fox, Haku strained his ears even as he whispered beneath his breath.

"Do you hear that!?"

Suzume scoffed dismissively.

"I hear nothing!"

Then a chorus of bells sounded from the kitchen so loudly Suzume flinched and gasped in surprise as chiming melodies went to war with each other. Jinging and jangling, they wove in and out of each other in a complexly punctuated melody of belligerent gold and silver voices as they struggled for dominance. Fearing the worst Haku scrambled to his feet only to teeter as lightheadedness eroded the edges of his vision. Even as he waved Suzume seized him, looping his good arm across his shoulders as the frozen bar of his arm wrapped tightly about Haku's waist. But before they could go sprinting out of the dressing room Onsen slammed the shuttered doors in their faces.

Magic surged up the wall and Haku jerked in surprise only to gawk in confusion as the door ceased to be a door. As he blinked the seams filled in and the bracings merged with the obdurate wood panels of the wall only to become more wall. Whirling and dragging him along Suzume made for the glass panned slider leading to the rotenburo. Again the fox came up short as the door jerked in its tracks only to fuse in place, transforming as it crystalized into stone. Spinning in a circle, Suzume came up short as the door leading to the inside pool tiled itself up as a clattering shimmering wave of white hexagons heaved off the floor to seal it shut. The fox snarled in exasperation as shutters snapped closed on the windows set high into the wall above the storage cubbies sealing them in completely and plunging them into steaming darkness. Incandescent blue sparklers sputter to life painting the walls with the shifting outlines of inky black foxes as Suzume thundered at the ceiling.

"House! What is the meaning of this!?"

The fox shied and Haku's skin crawled as more muffled bells screamed and angry shouts echoed. Her attention elsewhere Onsen continued to moan fret as the roof bowed and rippled beneath the weight of her disquiet. But where Haku expected the fox to threaten the house with fire and curses the God tempered. Shoving him away so roughly Haku was forced to catch himself on the edge of the bench as he almost fell Suzume took a deep breath as if stealing himself. Then he bowed ever so slightly and politely addressed the roof.

"Uchi-dono." (3)

As Suzume pronounced her name the dim interior froze to stillness. Blushing a light pink Suzume bore the full weight of her attention as it nearly crushed him. A chilling thrill went fizzling through Haku's bones and blood at the truth in the word. Hakuryo Onsen was the name of the traditional inn she housed. But that was not her name. Haku never thought to call her anything other than Onsen. But that was the word for what she was. He, however, had never considered that she had a name.

"Uchi-dono," Suzume repeated coaxingly, "Let us out."

She produced a single small chattering pop as if embarrassed by her outburst. Then the house jolted from floor to rafters so violently Haku's feet left the ground. He slumped over the bench as the ground continued to buck and heave. A bass moan groaned up through the timbers of her foundation that he felt inside his chest. Then the roof overhead peeled away like a curtain dragging the cross beams with it. Light rushed in from outside in a blinding flood of billowing dust. Haku cried out in shock as the rattling roar of the earthquake continued. Next the walls followed the ceiling, folding sideways like closing paper screens. These crashed over sideways folding and folding and folding smaller and smaller until they rolled away pulling up the floor boards in their wake. He was thrown sideways onto his back as the benches ripped out of the ground bucking and knocking forwards and back on their legs like stampeding cattle. Echoing cedar tubs rolled like wheels as sinks, toilets, and all manner of fixtures writhed and crawled in their wake as the tiles at his back ripped up in droves, skittering and hissing like a horde of white cased insects as they ushered the contents of the bathroom after the fleeing walls.

Haku grimaced and foundered as the base board scissor away beneath his feet like a closing fan. Together he and Suzume dropped through the floor onto a mire of steaming mud. It was only then that Haku realized the bath wing was gone. All that remained was the empty rotenburo and jumbled tilting piles of flagstone. Another roaring deep-throated rolled through the ground and Haku wallowed round only to watch in horror as above and all around him the massive beams that were the house's bones tore themselves out of the stone foundations. These crashed down about him like the trunks of massive falling trees. He and Suzume scrambled apart as one smashed down between them only to skate forward growing smaller and shrinking to nothing more than a toothpick as it disappeared in the great spreading curtains of brown billowing dust veiling the central structures.

Haku gaped as above the clouds the great keel of Onsen's blue-tiled roof shivered and heaved. It split right down the middle with a ripping pop he felt inside his chest. The roof yawned opened with a tremendous bellowing moan before it folded inward disappearing beneath the cloak of dust. Beside it the God wing's adjoining bridges ripped free only to zip sideways into the teetering three-story-structure before it collapsed downward like the flattening hull of a paper lantern. Finally the quaking in the ground rumbled to stillness. Haku whirled as a hand closed over his shoulder. Coated in mud, Suzume foundered beside him before hauling him upright. Throwing his attention back at the cloud he strained his eyes to see anything. But the veiling of billowing dust was impenetrable.

Staring uncomprehending Haku's insides coiled tighter and tighter. Slowly anxiety wound him to breaking as he shoved the fox away. Breathing out a ragged sob Haku threw his hands over his head in spite of the shocking pain. Circling them round and round he whirled and gathered a raging gale at his fingertips. This he set loose on the cloud with a shredded sob. Screaming blades of wind sliced across the newly exposed flats. Coiled mistrals detonated behind his back throwing him face first to the ground. Even as he cringed in the mud his angry wind scoured away the cloud of dust. Lifting his face from the steaming puddles his heart surged up into his throat. He stared uncomprehending as his world narrowed to simple thoughts.

The hill that their home had occupied was empty save for a scattering of foundation stones. Even the walls ringing the property were gone. The view from the hill down into the back fields and the forest beyond was unhampered. Looking forlorn and out of place the ponds and gardens stood naked beneath the sky. Nothing remained of Onsen; nothing save a single sliding door in its frame. It was the back door. It stood uselessly on the flat packed dirt where the kitchen had been. In front of it Sen stood like a stranger. Whereas her armor had eroded in fire and salt, her indigo and silk garments had not. The gold-red face of the phoenix gleamed in the gloomy bitter cold noon light. At her back God and humans milled in abject confusion. The quick white clouds of the mortal's breath lifted in floating clouds. None stirred from the lips of the Gods. Somewhere in their midst Haku could hear Lin's kits crying explosively. Sen ignored them completely, looking intently at what was cupped in her hands. Whatever it was, she held it as if it was the most precious thing in the world. Then she secreted it away into her pocket only to jerk in surprise at the thunderous shout.

"WHAT DID YOU DO!?"

Haku did not realize the fox crossed the distance in a blink until his voice echoed from afar. He jerked as if touched by a live wire at the blind rage in the God's voice. Lin scrambled to hand off the baby in her only arm but she was too slow. There was not enough time to interject herself between Suzume and Sen. Panic surged like cold acid in Haku's blood as he scrambled in the mud. But he was also slow. Too slow! Too slow! Sen, however, whisked up into the air out of the fox's reach as he lunged for her. Stunned, Haku's mouth dropped open as she drifted on high absolutely weightless. Over her head she opened the umbrella Onsen had gifted him. The wind in his blood stirred in response to the whipping gale she summoned. Wobbling only ever so slightly, she bent the air to her will and remained aloft. Unconcerned by his outburst Sen snapped back down at the fox.

"Calm down, Suzume! Onsen's safe!"

The muddy fox, however, was just as inconsolable as his house had been.

"Where is she!? What did you do to her?!"

A furious constellation of foxfires erupted in the air around Sen. Ducking in their midst, she dropped to perch on the door frame. Wobbling precariously holding her umbrella sideways for balance she produced the suzu. The rainbow of ribbons cracked and snapped and bells rang she bated the flames aside. Dancing across the narrow bar of wood she whirled on her toes staving them off.

"Grandfather, look out!"

Keiichi drew the old priest aside as the fox nearly trampled them. Hiko and Ginka towed Kai up to safety onto the mound that had been the front stairs. Natsumi appealed for temperance as she retreated cradling a screaming kit.

"Don't hurt Miss Sen, Suzume-san!"

The fox ignored her Little Green Frog seized the God's leg. Yoshi and Usagi followed suit, catching him around the middle. Aniyaku joined. So did Jae and Kenka and Megumi. But the fox shook them off growling like a wild animal. Finally, still holding one of the kits closely, Lin interceded. Kicking her long leg high she planted a foot in the middle of the fox's chest.

"Knock it off, Suzume!" Lin barked furiously.

The fox caught her ankle in his pale hands still blind with fury. But then he blinked, following the curve of her shapely calve to the lean length of thigh. As he did the bleached white God turned absolutely red. He stumbled back throwing his hands high scattering frogs as Lin gave him a firm shove. At once his foxfires guttered and snuffed out. Whipping the umbrella high over her head Sen sprang off the doorway before she could fall. Back in the safety of the air her suzu disappeared only to be replaced by something else. Kicking up clouds of dirt she touched down on the flats where the hallway to great room hat been. Thrusting out her arm she presented something and shouted firmly.

"Here! She's here!"

Haku peered across the distance as something blue-green gleamed in Sen's gloved. It looked like one of the kitchen tiles. It was. Scattering Gods and humans as he waded between them Suzume came up short before Sen. His snow white hands were shaking as he gently cupped what she offered. Stricken, he folded forward onto his knees bending over his hands.

"Child!" He repeated mournfully in a choke, "What have you done!?"

Standing over him unmoved the fox flinched at the sharp iron edge in her voice.

"Do you remember what the spiders did to her, Suzume?"

Even Haku shivered as it cut through him across the distance as she continued

"I won't watch monsters tear our house apart. I won't leave her behind. If we can't win today we're taking her with us."

Here Sen held out a demanding hand.

"Now give her back. She and I have work to do."

Baring his teeth leaning away in refusal Suzume loosed a yip as fire kindled in his fingers. The bright white flame of the house's presence bloomed in his cupped palms. Without flinching Sen snatched the flames from his fingers. Whisking the umbrella up in front of her like a shield she blew a breath into the tines. Her toes barely brushed the ground as she skated forward across the hill. Kai cried aloud watching in wide-eyed astonishment as Sen vaulted off the slope. Twirling slowly she drifted on a sure course as the Gods ducked their heads beneath her feet. Sinking onto her toes atop the doorframe she bent to place the burning tile atop the frame. As her flames extinguished the title latched onto the wood with a loud snap. The frame gave a jolt making Sen wave her arms for balance as she held her umbrella high. Then the slider yanked open with a familiar rattling snick. Haku blinked, because he could see through the doorway. There was nothing on the other side. All the same, with gasps and cries, the Gods retreated from it in fear clambering up the dirt bank.

"Damn it! Don't run!"

Sen called after them impatiently waving them back.

"I'm not sending you away!"

Stomping her foot, she made the doorframe rattle as she stabbed a finger down at it.

"It's Onsen's closet, okay!? She's demanding you put on something sturdier!"

The Gods glanced at each other uncertainly. Haku found himself unsurprised as Megumi broke away from the knot first. Jae reached after her scrambling to disentangle himself from Kenka.

"Wait, Meg! Meg!"

Ignoring the male, lifting her chin challengingly, the prim ballerina pointed the haft of the folded fan in her hand right at Sen as she marched under the archway. But on the other side she startled with an audible gasp coming up short staring at her hands. Gone was the white double breasted coat with its rows of buttons. Gone were her apron and black trousers. Instead she wore a suit of armor more than familiar in Haku's eyes. Above study split-toe boots gold and teal striped pleated trousers bound tightly from knee to ankle in studded bronzed shin guards that would protect but not weigh her movements. Brightly dyed purple shark-skin gloves gave traction as the hinged plates clasped around thickly padded silk arm guards would deflect blows without being cumbersome or bulky. The same could be said of the laced lacquered overlapping lames capping her shoulders and encasing chest in rows of gleaming turquoise and gold. More hung from her waist in flaring overlapping panels that comprised a split knee-length skirt that fell to her knees. These were secured by a wide sash of mauve silk tightly trussed around her narrow waist. This gleamed with sinuous curling wind patterns that carried over to gust across the fabric of her gear. Haku could not see the shock on Megumi's face. It was hidden beneath the flanged dome of her helmet and the fierce visage of a sharp beaked peacock. Emblazoned on the central plate of her chest guard was a device Haku had seen before. It was carved and painted on the chests of treasure Onsen kept secreted away in her shadows. Three gold sheaves of wheat overlapped into a circle. At its center was a churning ball of curling blue foxfire. Inside of which was a brilliantly burning heart.

Jae stared after her uncomprehending for a moment. Then, seizing Kenka, the smaller male dragged his startled friend across the threshold. As they crossed they came up short beside Megumi staring down and skittering apart as they held their hands up in awe. Each was similarly armored save for the colors of their gear. Haku shivered violently as he stared at the glimpse of their souls Onsen revealed in the armor she produced for the humans. Not surprisingly Jae's suiting flashed in fiery reds, oranges, and gold. Beneath the shading lip of the helmet his mask bore a fierce canine snarl. Gold pointed teeth gleaming in the frosty gloom as his steaming breath plumed through the mouth gap. Kenka's armor was arranged in summer shades of warm green and cool silver. Although the tall male's mask offered a somber silver humanoid face touched with heart-breaking sympathy willowy branches wove their way up the crest of his helm. Similar patterns of graceful leaves flashed and winked across the fabric of his trousers and securing panels of fabric enrobed plate. Again, in spite of differences in color on their chests each human bore Onsen's crest.

"Dude!" Kenka breathed in awe as he flattened his hands on his chest.

"Fuck, yeah!" Jae laughed explosively. "That's what I'm talkin' 'bout!"

The smaller male continued to enthuse striking expansive poses between jumping up and down as if experimenting with the weight and balance of his armor. Inspired, Megumi joined him, performing a stunning cartwheel, whipping sideways only to land back on her feet without so much as touching the ground. Then Megumi produced a rare laugh as the males shrank from her in surprise.

"It's so light!"

Here Sen straightened to perch on the door frame above the shaken thicket of Gods and mortals. Even as she looked down in grim satisfaction at Megumi, Jae, and Kenka, she wobbled slightly as Kai called out to her from the bank where the front stairs has been.

"Can I have some armor too!?"

As Haku watched all this from afar suddenly tremendous disquiet found him. But even as he crouched there shaking with fury, he could not stand nor could he speak. And so his opposition blew out of him in a violent, violent wind that ripped across the barren landscape kicking up a whipping curtain of dust to billow in its wake. More wind answered, this one dry and hot. He cringed from the smell of burning camphor as it buffeted his face, making him cringe behind an up-thrown arm. A shadow fell over him and he peered around his fingers at Sen was suddenly standing over him beneath the fluttering fabric of his tattered western umbrella. But she did not fold beside him to fuss and fluster over his injury with tearful worry as Chihiro might have. Instead she hung over him momentarily regarding his injured shoulder with an unwavering gaze of iron. Startled by her abrupt appearance the harsh words slipped out of him without his consent.

"This is not a game!"

She did not even flinch replying with quiet calm.

"I never said it was."

And her composure only unsettled him more, making him angrier. He stared up at her shocked by the frigid anger in his heart. The blistering cold spread through him on a surge of fury.

"No amount of armor can protect them from what is coming, Sen!"

As he spat her name hoarsely her answering rebuke came without hesitation.

"Shut up, Kohaku. Don't scare them with truth after they've made their decision to fight."

Stung by the forceful crack in her voice he leaned away as she crouched over her heels.

"You would risk our family!?"

Her cold severity burned him.

"We're stronger together. Beside, we can't run away anymore. Not this time."

Sen extended the hand not holding the haft of the umbrella. The glove was scorched and stained with blood.

"I need your fans. All of them."

Haku shivered in horror over what her request implied. Even though he had suggested this exact tactic suddenly faced with the reality of what it would require he balked. Sen, however, did not. Blinking rapidly, he jerked as she leaned forward and invaded his pockets. Mutely he looked on as she produced the wad of his tatter cloak and rummaged her hand into the folds of the filmy fabric that was a piece of his soul. One by one she produced Okesa's fans and shoved them into the sash at her waist. The last two were black, black, black with bells of iron to match her flinty eyes. At the sight of them a surge of panic made him seize the edge of her shattered breast plate with his uninjured hand. Bowing his head Haku choked on the words with miserable shame.

"I… I cannot stand with you!"

Desperately, selfishly, he wished she would pull him close and hold him if only for a moment. Chihiro would have offered him that but Sen had no comfort for him. Even her resolved words held no solace as she regarded him unwaveringly.

"Trust me like I trusted you at the Oni Rocks."

Haku barely heard her. In that moment he was consumed by resentment for the eerie stoicism radiating out of her. As before it turned Sen into a complete stranger; and with every appearance of this steely stranger the glimpses of Chihiro he caught in Sen grew more and more infrequent.

"Sen!"

Lin called distantly. The edge of fear in her voice made his insides contract with frozen dread.

"Sen, something's coming!"

Then she disappeared completely beneath the phoenix face of her red-gold mask. The spider silk plate ripped from his hand as she lurched up to feet with swift economy. She thrust the umbrella before her and skated away on a whip of hot wind that left him cringing in wonderment. When had she learned to master air? He did not know. All the same, Haku was left reaching after her with a protest on the tip of his tongue. It died there. Frozen with terror and lost within himself he stared wanting her to come back. But confusion tore him in two as he grappled with who he wanted to return.

He had chased this girl across both of the worlds. He has pursued her across time itself. Even after he found her she remained out of reach. And so he gave himself up, cut himself off from all he knew, all just to inch closer. For a moment, in the dream of the mortal life he had lived in Tokyo, she had been his. But that life had been a lie and the dream ended all too soon. Finally they had been reunited. Now it seemed there was nothing left of the girl he so cherished in this stranger of steel and fire. Horrified, Haku cringed from the realization. Agony stabbed him through the heart so powerful he rocked back on his heels with a gasp. Because it was Chihiro he called after. It was Chihiro whom he wanted to return. But Chihiro was gone. All the light and warmth in the world fled as he realized the tatarigami was right. In the end, in spite of everything, he had lost after all.

Bowing his head he gripped his cloak in his cursed hand as tears robbed him of sight. Endlessly despair pooled from the deep echoing well in his heart. But then it dyed a darker shade as bitterness made him reconsider everything he had sacrificed. Haku gasped as his index finger throbbed. He jerked as a cold tingling crept up his arm. Shocked, he realized he couldn't move as his arm twitched at his side. It no longer belonged to him. Arresting terror heaved in his chest making it too small to breath. By the time he realized Urami had seduced him it was too late. Shuddering and quaking he cried out as it spreading through him like a chilling disease. Surging to his feet he stumbled sideways as if he could flee his own arm somehow. But there was nothing he could do as it lulled him backwards into the swallowing dark. Then there was nothing more as it consumed him.

Notes:

jinbei (甚平), alternately jinbē (甚兵衛) or hippari (ひっぱり), is a kind of traditional Japanese clothing worn during the summer or around the house. Sets consist of a top and matching pair of shorts; although some have long pants. Traditional jinbei are made from hemp or cotton and are dyed a uniform color, often indigo, blue or green. –Source: Wikipedia.

Book one, chapter 11: hate.

The word uchi has deep meaning in Japanese culture. A simple translation would be home as it carried the connotation of family. But there is so much more weight and feeling in the word. Uchi is also used to mean, "Where someone belongs." Women in the Kansai region sometimes use it casually instead of watashi when referring to themselves.