"Please hold."
No. I don't want to hold. Bitch.
I was beginning to grow very pissed off at the FBI. When Edward had tried to get in touch with an agent for some help on the whole mob thing and was frustrated, I had thought he was just overreacting. But in reality, after fifteen minutes of trying, I had been put on hold four different times. I now understood how he had felt so murderously frustrated.
Golf season was in full swing, with meets almost every other day. We had a two and a half hour bus ride to a golf course for a meet. Fortunately, we had gotten a coach bus, so I was able to have a phone conversation. The night before, I had been online, trying to find a number I could call, knowing that I had a long bus ride ahead of me.
Rosalie was sitting in the pair of two seats diagonal to me, and Brenner was occupying the two seats to my side. They were both completely oblivious to my growing annoyance. They were actually having a conversation which Rosalie seemed very interested in. Their topic? Ideal vacation spots. Thanks Rose.
I huffed and let my head fall back against the seat, glancing over at the two of them. Brenner was raising an eyebrow, and Rose was raising a very high eyebrow.
"What?" I asked defensively.
"Don't hurt yourself over there Swan. I know how hard thinking is for you," Brenner mocked. I glared, he glared mockingly back. I debated on flipping him off or not and the consequences. I shrugged and was about to do so, but Rose distracted him.
"What about Italy?"
After three minutes of extensive finger strumming, the shitty elevator music finally ceased and a human voice picked up. "How may I help you?" an uninterested monotone asked me, probably not caring in the least what she could do to help me.
I eyed Rose and Brenner to make sure they were still thoroughly immersed in the Vatican discussion. They were. Looking back out the window I spoke into my phone, "I would like to speak with agent leading the Carlin murder case."
As a turns out, five dead bodies with gun holes, don't go unnoticed. Brody Carlin was found dead in an alley with two gun shots in the chest, the local news informed us. I recognized the face and date of death as soon as the anchor reported it. It was everything I could do not to gasp when they showed the drivers license.
They showed the report two days ago. This was two days after my snooping at the abandoned gas station and my realization that I probably could die in the next few months. Edward has only been gone a week and a half. I found the short article on the Fox news page and emailed Edward the link, wondering what the hell I was supposed to do.
But that's not the strange part. There had been four more dead bodies in that alley …so why wasn't there an investigation on their deaths? I was completely baffled by this. Why only the one? A few different scenarios had ran through my head, but none of them really made sense. For example, maybe the stalking mob guys had grabbed four the bodies to keep implications away from themselves. But I didn't really have a reason why they didn't grab the fifth.
Anyhow, our local police department has already given up on the case. They gave it their best shot. I mean they must've worked on that for almost two weeks.
It was a good run.
So, they sent the case into the FBI's homicide department, not knowing what else to do. I figured I should talk to the agent that is leading the investigation. I had to be careful not to implicate Edward or Elliot for well…actually doing the killing. I had a feeling I was breaking a couple laws there.
"Please hold," the woman told me. And then…the fucking elevator music. I groaned.
By the time I was patched through to the agent, Rose and Brenner had moved on to Australia. I had no idea why Rosalie suddenly had piqued interest with world travel. She was probably just bored. I also had no idea how Brenner managed to travel as much as he did; the man was a high school teacher.
"Special Agent Booth," a masculine nice voice answered. Probably a military man. I had learned that any guy, or girl, even Alice who has been in the army answer the phone with a sense of noticeable dignity about them.
"Hi, I'm calling in regards to the Carlin case," I informed him, trying to sound twenty, verses twelve.
"Whatcha got for me?" he asked clearly interested. I was so relieved that he was going to listen. That hadn't been that hard.
So for the next three minutes straight, I told him as much as I could about the mob thing, and deaths that had occurred without mentioning Edward, myself, or Elliot, or even where I lived. I'm sure he could trace my call effortlessly though. I told him what I knew about Brody, which was exceedingly limited. And I ended with the whole man hunt thing. I managed to this without attracting anyone on the buses attention.
"The Chicago mafia hunt isn't my department, have you tried to get in touch with that section of the FBI yet? I can look up that agent heading the investigation for you." Agent Booth asked, patient, yet I could tell my words were heavy on his mind.
Deciding to prove that I wasn't a prank call, I racked my mind for the name of the man Edward had talked to. "Agent Taylor hung up on the call."
"I've been looking into that case myself. Taylor, well, I'm not entirely surprised…" Knew he was an asshole… The agent continued after a second, strangely not accusing, "You know who killed Carlin, don't you." It wasn't even a question.
I didn't say anything. I had watched enough Law and Order to know that my mouth could get me in some serious trouble if I didn't become more discreet.
"Alright," he sighed, "look, I've already concluded that Carlin was part of that mob. Those are some pretty notorious guys. I'm sure he was his own fault in his death. I can work out immunity for you and whoever you're protecting if you help me out on this mob case."
I watched the window as the trees flew past me thoughtlessly. This agent seemed like a good guy who could help me, and help Edward. Essentially, this had been what Edward had been calling for in the first place. I just wasn't sure if Edward would be able to get away with the killing he did. He was acting purely in defense, he did not shoot first. He was just a better shot. I decided that I would take the agent up on his offer, but I would do anything, and say anything to protect Edward.
"Did Carlin shoot before he was shot at?" Agent Booth asked slowly, and somewhat intensely. I let out a quiet breath, hoping I knew what I was doing.
"Several times," I replied, thinking back to my prom night. Several times seemed generously inaccurate. But then again, I did throw a show at the man.
"That's all I need to know for now. I've got a mafia to bring down." The agent gave me his number and email address. He wanted me to download the pictures I had taken and send them to him at the FBI for further reference. I didn't really need to give him my number, I was pretty sure he had it. And with that I finally hung up on the phone.
I was helping the FBI bring down the mafia that had really fucked up my boyfriend's life and still were. I think that qualified me as girlfriend of the year.
Or at least a solid 2nd place.
oOo
May 15th.
Last year, the date held no significance. There were no great disasters, no birthdays of anyone special I knew; no milestones in my life. Nothing. It was just another day. But not anymore.
May 15th was Alice's due date.
I sighed as knocked on Alice's door. I had just gotten home from school and she had been on my thoughts all day. It was just a sad thought. Today was supposed to have been a happy day. It hurt to think about what was supposed to have happened. There should have been a little baby boy in Alice's arms today.
Time had flown by for me since Alice's miscarriage. I knew that sounded selfish, but I had been dealing with a hell of a lot of shit since then. Therefore, I wasn't sure what to say to her. I knew I was a poor substitute for who she really wanted home from Iraq.
"Come in," Alice's muffled voice called softly. Tentatively I pushed the door open and peaked my head in the room. Alice was perched on the head of her bed by the pillows, looking out the sunny window. She turned her head when I slipped in and gave me a sad smile. I padded across the carpet to where she was and quietly sat down on the ground in front of her.
I said nothing as she went back to staring out the window. My eyes wandered to her lap where she had an unmarked book. It was just one you could find at a book store, full of blank pages. It was brown with a light blue opaque bird design on it.
"What's that?" I asked softly, unable to attain my curiosity. Alice's eyes moved from the window and followed by gaze down to the book.
She sighed quietly and touched the book lightly. "When I found out I was pregnant, I started writing to the baby. You know, so he could read it one day."
I nodded understandingly, not knowing what to say. It was a beautiful idea. Alice gave me another sad smile. "It's so weird. I never wanted to be pregnant at 21. I didn't want kids so early. But now," she sighed sadly, "I'd give anything to meet my son."
This was supposed to have been a happy time for Alice. Jasper would be coming home in a month, and she was supposed to have had a beautiful baby boy to welcome him with. I could picture in my mind so clearly what should have happened. But when I did that, I just got angry, angry that it was only my imagination.
"I think we all would," I said softly. I had been so looking forward to seeing everyone with a baby, especially Edward and Emmett with a new nephew. I almost smiled at the thought of Edward with a baby in his arms.
Alice remained silent for a few minutes. We both just stared out the window. The occasional few cars passed on the street. Two black birds flew through the sky. Clouds passed us by. Life was going on.
"We were going to name him Riley," she announced quietly.
Through the melancholy, I smiled. Riley Whitlock. "He would have been the most spoiled little boy in the world," I told her. God, he would have been such a cutie pie. My heart ached for Alice and Jasper and their incomplete family.
Alice almost smiled too, "I know." I watched as her eyes ghosted over, imagining what should have been. I wished there was something I could do for her. I wished I knew what to say.
I cleared my throat. "He was so loved. From the minute we saw that pregnancy test, he was loved. He was loved by everybody in this house hold, and he was loved all the way from Iraq. That baby had more love then some people ever do."
And finally, after over two months, I knew I had said the right thing.
Alice looked down over at me and smiled. She closed her eyes and smiled, nodding in agreement. "He was," she affirmed in a whisper. "I just wish Jasper would have gotten a chance to meet him and feel him kick."
"God you guys what have been the most adorable family ever," I sighed, shaking my head in joking envy. Then to my surprise Alice giggled.
"We're both terrified of babies," she chuckled and then smirked. I raised an eyebrow, partially because of the statement, but mostly because of how well Alice was handling this. If she's not the strongest person I've ever met, I didn't know who was.
"Really?" I asked, surprised. Alice seemed like a baby person…but then again, I thought back to her terrified state of finding out she was pregnant.
"Yeah, I mean they're cute, but they're so breakable! I've never really been around babies in my life, but I have a fear I'll drop one if I hold it!" she told me conspiringly. This was most emotion I had seen from Alice in a long time.
"And they're loud…" I trailed off, shuddering at some of my worse babysitting jobs.
Alice nodded vigorously, "And gross! I'm sure when it's yours you don't think so, but they just are kinda messy."
Laughing I fell back against the plush carpet, "It's going to be hilarious to watch you two have another baby." I was going to say become parents, but then I realized that her and Jasper already were parents. They had become parents the day Riley had been conceived.
"Eh, I think Emmett and Rose will be so much more fun," she smirked, shaking her head with a smile. No one had ever made a greater point.
"Are they dating?" I had always just assumed they were…something. I mean when Emmett left last summer Rose had only been 17, and he had been 23. I know they hadn't done anything, and if they would have done something over prom week, Rose would have told me. Come to think of it, I didn't even think Rose knew what they were.
Alice shrugged and gave me an incredulous, really? Like I'd know, look, "I don't know. I do know that Emmett would do anything for her."
I smiled, happy that Emmett was just a good guy. I couldn't have designed a better guy for Rose. "I'm glad; it'll be good when they get back."
"Oh my God, I know," Alice agreed. She moved the book off of her lap and slid off the bed so that she was on carpet, lying on her back diagonal to me. It was still weird watching her move so easily. I still felt like she should be waddling around. It made me sad, but I pushed the thought away.
"You know…" Alice started, looking over at me with a genuine, amazing smile, "the baby's full name was Riley Edward Whitlock."
oOo
"Shot gun!" I declared to everyone, and didn't wait for a response. I darted to the front of the van at the passenger seat and stood by it protectively.
"What!" Rose exclaimed, annoyed, "I so called that yesterday! You got to ride in front last time!" she complained. The other four girls had shrugged and were already walking to their respective places by the van. It was one of those standard vans that most school districts had. It had two rows of seats not including the driver and passenger. I hated being in the two back rows and since Rose and I were the captains, we usually got the front.
"Did not!" I disagreed as Brenner unlocked the van. I darted into the seat before Rosalie could say anything else.
"I did! Brenner even heard me," she whined as she got in to row of seats behind me. Usually we took buses to meets with a few other schools, but sometimes that didn't work with the other schools, so we had to take vans.
Rose looked over at Brenner for help as he slid into the driver's seat. He help is hands out innocently and shook his head. "I heard nothing."
Rosalie huffed and glared at him through the rearview mirror. She buckled her seat belt and crossed her arms in annoyance. The little 7th grader sitting next to her looked mildly offended.
Brenner rolled his eyes and addressed her through the mirror, "Oh come on! You mess with the radio. I don't want to listen to Carrie Underwear or Brad Poosley for a whole hour again. I'm taking my chances with Swan." Rose just glared, knowing he had said underwear and poosley just to spite her. He chuckled as he turned on the vehicle, and I smirked smugly.
I dug out my notebook that had my valedictorian speech in it from my back pack and tucked my feet under me. Through the course of events, I had somehow ended up the class's valedictorian. I guess it was because my final grades of last semester had been all A's, and all teachers loved me…no seriously. I was that kid.
Anyway, now I was saddled with writing a speech that I was currently failing at. Last night I had typed what I had so far into an email and sent it to Edward. The subject of the email? Help Me With This Goddamn Stupid Speech. I wasn't exactly Martin Luther King Jr. I wasn't the best at speech writing. I had no problem presenting a speech, I had been on the speech team, and usually I was a pretty creative writer but so far I had shit.
About ten minutes into our drive to the golf course, my cell phone started to ring. I dug it out of my backpack anxiously as Brenner mocked my ring tone. I'll admit…Blondie's Call Me, wasn't exactly the best choice. But at the time I had found it pretty clever.
I beamed when I saw that it was Edward. He must have just finished dinner.
"Hi," I smiled into the phone.
Edward chuckled at my chipper voice, "Morning snicker doddle."
We chatted for a few minutes about nothing consequential. He asked how Alice handled the due date a couple days ago, and I told him it was better than I expected. I had to give Alice credit; she had come at lot farther than I had originally thought. She was back to being Alice. I was so glad. I didn't tell Edward that the Whitlock baby had his name; I think Alice or Jasper wanted to someday.
"Well what did you think about my speech?" I asked Edward after a couple minutes.
We had come to an accident on the high way, so traffic was moving about three miles per hour. During my catching up with Edward, Brenner had been glancing over to my notebook and reading my speech. I was totally oblivious, until he decided to make his opinion know.
"Give me that," Brenner demanded, and before I could stop him he reached over and plucked the phone out of my hand and brought it to his own ear. I watched, both annoyed and amused.
"Please tell me you won't lie and say that is a decent speech." Brenner looked over and gave me a pointed, teasing look. I glared.
Edward said something back and Brenner nodded, and a smirk on his face. "Good man," he affirmed to Edward. I held my hand out for the phone, not amused. With a chuckle, Brenner handed me back my cell phone.
"Is it that bad?" I asked Edward rhetorically as soon as the phone was against my ear again. Brenner nodded. I stuck my tongue out.
"Well…" Edward trailed off. I sighed.
"What am I supposed to say? Do people even take these things seriously?" This was one of those times where I was glad that Edward was older than me.
"Not yours…" Brenner muttered under his breath. I smacked his arm.
Edward answered, oblivious to my annoying golf coach. "You'd be surprised, people actually rather sentimental at graduation speeches."
I groaned. Edward laughed at my misery with sympathy, "Just maybe, lay off on the metaphors a little bit…" he suggested.
"Which one is bad?" I asked curiously, I looked down at the notebook page and skimmed over what I had written.
"The flame of kindness that has been kindled from the years at this school and has ignited the candle that is our heart, must never be extinguished," Brenner quoted word for word, using a high pitched voice, probably supposed to sound like mine. I glared murderously as Edward laughed on the other line, having heard Brenner's imitation.
"Well…that one's a little rough," Edward said through his poorly stifled chuckles.
I sighed, "Well what should I take out of it?"
"All of it," Brenner and Edward both answered immediately. I exasperatedly pursed my lips. I looked over at Brenner, raising an eyebrow. He held up a hand in defense. He was done now.
Edward got in control of his poorly hidden amusement and said seriously, "Look babe, I know you're an amazing writer. Don't try and do a huge dramatic speech. You're not a politician. Just try and write something about moving on, and going on out into life. But please, please don't use a bird hatching analogy."
As Edward said it, I already formed some ideas into my head. I could do it.
I lowered my voice to make sure Brenner was overhearing the conversation. Without missing a beat, he started a conversation with Rosalie about her college, giving me some privacy. "I miss you. It feels like years since you were here, even though it was just two weeks ago."
"I know Bella, believe I know. I miss every little thing about you. I want to go back to the lake just as much as you do. I want to see your face lit up in the sun. I've never seen you happier than you were there," he said quietly, with fierce passion and longing back for the days we were together last summer.
I felt slightly better once he said is words, but my stomach still knotted. I was never even physically alright unless he was home. I propped my elbow on the arm rest by the window and let my chin fall into my hand as I stared out the window. "I wish you were here," I sighed. I could see so clearly the image of us spinning around on the jet ski, I remember exactly the way his chest felt as I held onto to him tightly. I can remember his actual laugh –not the way it sounded over the phone- as I yelped.
I shook my head, just tired. I was tired of being the army girlfriend. I was tired of only hearing his voice, or occasionally seeing him on a web cam. I wanted him home God dammit. "You're so, so far way. I hate that the only thing we have in common about where you are is the stars," I said miserably.
"I know, it feels like we're worlds apart," he sighed, just as done with this as I was. I heard his love in his voice as he went on to tell me, "I miss the year that has gone by without you. I've missed so much of your life, and I hate it." His frustration was just as evident as mine, but beneath that, I heard determined dedication.
I remembered back to last July when Edward had sent me the letter 18 days after our first time. I had memorized one particular thing that he had written because it had just given me so much hope. "I promise you I'll work ten times harder than any other man does in a relationship just so we can have a chance to live a happy, normal life together." We were so, so close to it.
"Bella?" he asked after a second. His breathing had gotten harsh from his fierce declaration, but now his voice level.
"I promise that we are going to have a perfect summer under the stars. And we'll be under them together," he promised, determined. I half smiled.
I knew Edward promised in the best of his ability. We both knew that he was promising with crossed fingers. I wished more than anything just to have him safely back with me for good. And I hoped the mafia wasn't going to compromise that.
But more than that, I hoped that the army wouldn't make him break his promise to me.
So far away from where you are
These miles have torn us worlds apart
And I miss you, yeah I miss you
So far away from where you are
I'm standing underneath the stars
And I wish you were here
I miss the years that were erased
I miss the way the sunshine would light up your face
I miss all the little things
I never thought that they'd mean everything to me
Yeah I miss you
And I wish you were here
I feel the beating of your heart
I see the shadows of your face
Just know that wherever you are
Yeah, I miss you
And I wish you were here
From Where You Are, Lifehouse
-This is personally one of my favorite chapters. I'm not entirely sure why, but I happen to like it. I think it's because I miss my Brenner and I want an Edward; I'm jealous of a character, which shows you where my life is currently(;
-Agent Booth is from Bones. This isn't a crossover, I just love the man. Another reason to be jealous of Bella. Damn.
-A few chapters ago, when I announced my most likely end of fanfiction, I got the most AMAZING responses. And I just can't thank you all enough. I was reading them last night and I have never felt so encouraged in my life. Thank you so much for giving me the confidence and courage to do what I love.
