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Love – Part Two Vol. I (or Insert rod (p) into slot (v).)
October 6th 2000 (or Arya's freshmen year in college)
The Young Girl
Arya thought she knew all the ins and outs of sex. When she was eight she remembered overhearing Jon and Rob, two teenage boys at the time, discussing a certain magazine that Jon had gotten from a friend. They spoke frankly about what went where, what spurted out what, and that's when the seven-year-old Arya found out exactly how sex happened. Over the next eleven or so years she learned more and more until she thought understood the rather simple instructions. Insert rod (p) into slot (v). Lubricate as needed. Never, under any circumstances, insert anything into slot (b). Slot (b) is exit only.
It was a Friday evening and Gendry lay asleep after vigorously and thoroughly inserting his rod into her proper slot. Sansa was out of the dorm room that weekend, back home visiting mom and dad, so Gendry and Arya were making the most of their time alone. They threw her mattress off her loft so the ceiling would not be an encumbrance for their activities. It was nothing but rapturous pleasure, if not incredibly clichéd considering their wanton wailings and his passing out immediately after. Gendry deserved it though, he knew the instructions very well, and his Friday was busy with three classes. She rested her head on his chest and listened to his heart beat and his chest rise up and down. Sex was the exact palate cleanser they both needed after a long week.
However, sex was so much more than that a simple palate cleanser. When she was young she assumed it was amazing, but she had no idea how much until her third time. Her first two times were certainly enjoyable, but they were awkward, but the third time was mind blowing. They had Gendry's house to themselves, which was good because Arya was pretty sure people on the street heard her. She was so small, and he was big, and thick, and everywhere all at once. It didn't hurt much anymore and whatever friction she felt was splendid. Not to mention they were they were no longer virgins. Arya knew how to roll her hips better in sync and Gendry wasn't timid any more, knowing how and when to push and pull at her. Arya knew in retrospect that while their third time wasn't that good, they were still horribly inexperienced, but the memory of their third time was the best memory of sex she would ever have.
Sex was amazing, but it wasn't perfect. It was so sticky. It was sticky on him, it was sticky on her, and the bed sheet was drenched in their stick. And although it no longer hurt like it once did, following their instruction manual so vigorously she knew she'd be a tad sore in the morning. Also, it stank…a lot. Her dorm room reeked like they had committed some kind of crime against humanity, probably involving animal sacrifices. She considered opening the window, but it was a cold November night and she preferred their stank to the cold.
Besides being sticky, and smelly, at times sex was not that sexy. They had never done it in front of a mirror, but Gendry had mentioned a couple of times that her 'O-face' was simultaneously erotic and ridiculous. He said that she looked she was sucking on a lemon as her eyes rolled to the back her head. Gendry's face was actually worse. At first she wasn't even sure he was cumming because it looked like he was in agonizing pain. His eyes twitched a little, his nostrils flared, and he grunted like a disgruntled show walrus. The second weirdest part was that his right leg, always his right leg, never his left leg, would beginning to tremble as he neared his moment and then stiffen like a board as he finally came. The weirdest part of it all was she found that kind of hot.
Beyond being un-sexy, planning for sex was sometimes obnoxious. They both enjoyed the spontaneous moment when they would just tackle each other, but considering they both had roommates, and they both had busy schedules, it made spontaneity practically impossible. Scheduling was a must. Assuming their roommates were on campus they only had three guaranteed times for sex: Tuesday from ten to eleven when they were both free and Sansa was in Biology; Wednesday from two to four when Gendry's roommate had Calc; and Friday from eight to nine when Sansa had Stats. Any other time they had the either dorm room to themselves there was always a chance that Sansa or Gendry's roommate would wander in on them and Arya would rather be frustrated and horny than risking Sansa seeing Gendry twitching and grunting like a walrus.
Planning actually wasn't the worst part, the preparation was her biggest annoyance. They had to make sure they had 'supplies,' that being condoms and lube. She still didn't feel comfortable of the idea just relying on her birth control, so without a fresh rubber they were a no go for launch. One particular Tuesday morning Arya remembered Sansa almost walking in on them because Gendry had to spend twenty minutes running to Wal-Mart on a quest for condoms. Lube wasn't essential, but helpful, and they had grown very accustom to a pleasant artificial slickness.
Hair removal was her least favorite part of the prep. The one nice thing about being separated from Gendry over the previous year was the fact that she could let herself go when it came to shaving her legs. Besides Bran occasionally calling her a 'woolly mammoth' when she walked around the house in shorts there wasn't much of a downside. It was in fact the only downside of Gendry's first trip home from school was that she had to pull out her reliable Ladies' Gillette and shave her legs…along with trimming her bushes. Gendry said she didn't 'have to' but he implied that if she wanted him to play 'Rescuers Down Under' he rather not go deep into the hairy underbrush. God she hated shaving. It added twenty minutes a week to her bathroom routine; she hated the goosebumps when she got a chill, the itchiness when the hair grew back, and it was really hard to do a good job on her underbrush. It's not like she had a mirror in her shower stall.
It wasn't fair at all because Gendry got to keep all of his hair - in fact she insisted on it. He had shaved his goatee off over the summer. She would have none of that and demanded he grow it back. It was really odd looking at him without the sheer black outline around his lips and more importantly she missed the thick soft hair on her lips. She also loved the soft curly fuzz that covered his chest. She considering running her finger through it, but something else caught her attention.
Gendry's backpack lay open on the bedroom floor. They had been out of supplies and Gendry forgot to zip his bag back out after whipping them out. A black and white composition notebook jutted out slightly from the bag. All of the notebooks he used for his classes were bland three-subject college ruled, so this notebook was special. Something about it just called her to her, and like sailor pulled to her rocky doom by the sirens she couldn't help herself. She slithered out of the bed and slipped the notebook out of his bag. She flicked open the first page and instantly knew that she was holding Gendry's journal.
No, she thought, bad Arya. But she didn't take orders from anyone, not even herself. She knew it was wrong, but…Gendry could be so private…secretive…sometimes. She knew his father was on his mind more than he mentioned and she wanted to know he was doing okay with it. Brienne was another subject she wanted to know about. She wasn't keen on Gendry's new giantess of a friend and wanted to know what Gendry really thought of her. Also, if she happened to run into any information about her sister, who she knew had developed a disgusting crush on Gendry last year when Arya wasn't around, then so be it. Curiosity was her vice, she accepted it, and dived into his journal.
Each entry was dated and varied wildly in length and content. As she started to flip through she noticed many entries from the beginning of the last year and she was normally the topic.
Fuck I miss her. It's like funny how much I miss her. I knew I would, but at this point it's pathetic. It doesn't help that I see her everywhere. Every little thing reminds me of her. Cute girl in Bio has her eyes. Cute girl in English 150 sounds like her. Ohh…fuck me…it's going to be a long year.
I think I get now why my mom suggested that Arya and I maybe 'take this year off.' She wasn't saying that we should break up, she was saying that being apart is hard.
She turned the pages and kept on going until she saw the name Brienne. There we go she thought. Time to find out what he really thought of that giantess.
Talked to the tall blonde in Bio 210 earlier today. Her name is Brienne. I think she might be more shy and awkward then me. Our babies would be seven foot blondes unable to make eye contact. She seems like a nice girl. Kind of girl that doesn't know any dirty jokes but loves to laugh at them.
Anyways, Brienne is nice. We had lunch after class on Tuesday and I wouldn't be surprised if we did that again. Arya might like her. So would Sansa…maybe.
Fuck I gotta get some guy friends. It's too bad most guys are idiots.
That really isn't that interesting, she thought as she glanced over her shoulder again. Geez Gendry, can't you're journal be more interesting. Gendry was still asleep so she dived deeper. She moved more quickly now, briskly skinning each page looking for a keyword, and she came to violent stop when she found it: Sansa.
I think Sansa has a crush on me. I could be crazy, but she is hanging around me more often. It started after that night on the lake. We actually talked about that night the other day at lunch and she called me 'her knight in shining armor' and I don't think it was supposed to ironic. I don't think there's much behind it, she's just latching on to the first boy that was nice to her. I just hope it doesn't…complicate things. If Arya knew the way Sansa was looking at me I doubt she'd be happy.
Should I stop hanging out with Sansa? She can actually be fun – I only occasionally get the urge to strangle her. Not to mention if I just stomped off our weekly lunch date that would probably also be complicated. A love sick, angry Sansa, could be a dangerous Sansa.
I have to admit, it feels nice…her having a crush on me. One of the most popular girls in high school as 'thing' for me. Then again, in college, we're both total dorks. She's so much more awkward now that she's here. Whatever she thought college was going to be, she was totally wrong. I think she's also 'into' me because I remind her of high school. I'm the familiar, the known, on this big scary campus.
In an alternate universe where I wasn't with Arya she'd be someone I could see myself being with. Maybe. It's hard to tell actually. For my entire life there's just been Arya. Not sure if that's good or bad. That's just the way it is I guess.
Who knows. It could all be in my head.
Arya held back a growl. I fucking knew it. There wasn't anything going on besides hypotheticals but still the idea of Sansa and Gendry…her fucking sister getting her boyfriend…was just too fucked up for words. Of course Sansa wants him…she wants everything I have. It could have been worse she knew, she went digging through Gendry's mind, she had no right to complain when she got dirty. And, on some level, she knew it was nothing…but she would have just rather read something better.
Dear Journal: Sansa is an icky girl with cooties. I only hang out with her because I have to. In fact, I think the only decent looking female on the planet is Arya. If she were to die tomorrow I'd probably be celibate or go gay.
Gendry continued to snore so she absentmindedly flipped through more of notebook. As she came closer to the present there were less entries and it began to transition to drawings. They started simple, doodles here and there, but over time the doodles became sketches of people. Gendry hated drawing people, he said he didn't have talent for it and could never make the faces look right. She knew he was wrong, but did agree his talent did talents laid with more stylized drawing, but as per usual he was being stupid.
Arya's heart skipped a tiny bit when she realized that the first twenty sketches were all of her. The first couple of pages were of just her face – her nose looked a little big to her, but overall it was a good job. She continued to page through the notebook she continued to see herself, over and over again. Sometimes she was sad, sometimes she was angry, and sometimes was happy. On the bottom of the page she noticed that each portrait had different names based on her state of mood – Angrya, Happarya, Sadrya.
She knew she was pushing her luck so she flipped to the end of the journal passing by a smattering drawings and writing. Near the end of the notebook was an entry from today.
I had a really weird dream last night. Arya and I were in high school, psyche class I think. Then I was called into the principal's office. Arya and I went into his office and he told us my dad was dead. Next thing we were at the funeral. My mom was dressed in all black. Eddie was there too, but he was a baby, and Arya was holding him. My mom came running up to me and demanded that I go get some more beer. "It was your father's favorite!" she yelled at me. Then I woke up. I spent most of the afternoon trying to figure out what it meant…I'm pretty sure it meant nothing.
I really hope it meant nothing.
I haven't seen or heard from that fucker in four years- couldn't he given me the courtesy of not showing up in my dreams? I'd rather be spending my time in my dreams with uptight, but slightly dirty, school girl Sansa and Mrs. Arya Stark, the tough as nails student teacher in a detention hall for three. Is that so much to ask?
Speaking of the Stark girls - Sansa is out of town this weekend. Which means we'll actually get to have uninterrupted sex. I should make sure we have condoms. I hated running out to get those that one time. I think the checkout clerk noticed my hard on.
"What ya doin'?" Gendry asked from behind her and she fought back a squeal. If he were to just get up and look over her shoulder it might be the end of everything. Damn stupid curiosity Arya cursed at herself. I'm like a cat –curiosity as never done anything good for me.
"Nothing…" she nonchalantly answered and slid the notebook back into his backpack but her mind went into a frenzy.
Crapbaskets.
October 27th 2008 (or two weeks after Sansa's wedding)
Mrs. Arya Stark
Nimble fingers danced up and down Arya's spine and for a moment Arya was happy. Arya's message appointment started at three-thirty but she lost all sense of time when Irri began digging her fingers into Arya's flesh. She was giving Arya more pleasure than any other woman ever had, not to mention giving Arya more pleasure than her husband had over the last month.
It was a little after three-thirty on a Monday afternoon when Arya walked into the White Stallion Spa. It was a two story red brick building with a large marbled horse fountain in the lobby. The couches and chairs in the lobby were red leather with glass coffee tables in front of them. Red satin drapes adorned the walls along with pictures of several of the 'girls of the White Stallion,' with most of the girls wearing bikinis, or tank tops, or crop tops. It was a near perfect mix of upscale and tacky. Yeah, this is defiantly the type of place Tyrion would go to she thought as she sat in the lobby. Her masseuse, Irri, greeted her a few minutes later. She was striking to say the least with dark copper skin, long braided black hair, and almond colored eyes. Arya followed the girl into the back for her massage.
The spa treatment was the latest twig on an olive branch Gendry kept on reaching out to her. The first gift was large yellow prep book for the LSAT. The second was simple white T-Shirt with the phrase 'I'm billing you for this.' Gendry figured when she became a lawyer people would ask her for free legal advice, much like people constantly asked Gendry for advice on art. The final gift was this afternoon at a Spa recommended to him by both Tyrion and Dany. Tyrion said that he had sent Sansa there on several occasions and at the wedding Dany raved about her favorite masseuse. So, Gendry scheduled Arya an appointment for the first Monday after she was done with Lannister, Lannister, and Lannister. He said it'd be a good way to relieve some stress and start focusing on law school.
All the gifts were thoughtful, and she loved them, but each time he handed her some poorly wrapped item she felt her blood boil. He thinks he can just buy me she thought. He thinks he can make it up to me by just buying me shit. It didn't matter that the gifts were good, or that he was trying, it just wasn't enough. She wasn't sure what, if anything, would be enough. She still loved him, more than he maybe deserved, but she just couldn't look at him the same anymore. Kissing Her wasn't even the bad part. Gendry's true sin was not telling Arya. People fuck up, they both knew that, but he decided she couldn't handle the truth or that she didn't deserve it. Even as Irri's slowly worked down her back, Arya couldn't help but tense up as her mind wandered.
"You have a lot of stress in your back," Irri purred as her palms pushed down above Arya's ass. At first Arya found it a little unnerving to be clothed with only towel over her ass, but Irri's hands made it all worth the while.
"It's been a tough couple of weeks," Arya answered in between her groans of pleasure.
"Ohh, what happened?" Irri asked.
"Just normal stuff; my sister got married, I quit my job, going to go to law school…and some other stuff."
"Sounds like mixed bag."
"That's one way to put it," Arya sighed. I prefer to say clusterfuck, but that's just me.
"You're husband paid for this session?" Irri asked. Arya moaned and nodded as deft finger's worked up spine. "Was it a gift or is this an apology?"
You're pretty chatty for a masseuse, Arya thought, but was in no place to state her annoyance. She was putty in Irri's palms and didn't want that to change. "He screwed-up," Arya begrudgingly admitted.
"Big…or small?"
"…Big," Arya answered.
"Uhh," Irri grunted and went about her work. "Surprises me."
"Why?" Arya asked.
"Well, about half the women that come here 'cus they got a gift from their husband, boyfriend, whatever. About half of those are really gifts and the other half are the screw-ups. And, your husband doesn't strike me as the screw-up type."
"Why's that?" Arya asked.
"Well, when you sign-up for a session with us, we ask you some questions; which treatment do you want, for how long, and then we ask if you had any special requests," she paused and applied more oil to back of Arya's back. It tingled against her skin as Irri ran smooth sliding strokes down her back. "Your husband filled in the entire 'special requests' section. He said you'd want lavender candles if possible, that you'd want some light jazz or sounds of the nature for the music, and he also requested me," Irri's voice peaked with pride with the last part.
"So?"
"Well, most of the time the guys who screw-up don't go through that much effort. I suppose either they don't think about it or they don't know their girl well enough to fill in that part."
"Huh…well, my husband does know me pretty well."
"Well, hopefully he didn't screw-up too much…" Irri trailed off as has her kneading increased with force and speed. Before she drowned in a sea of pleasure she thought he didn't screw-up a lot, he just screw up once…and then lied about it. Her spite didn't last long as the waves of pleasure washed over her and drowned of her fiery rage at her husband.
"So…" Irri broke the silence about ten or fifteen minutes later in the session. "Is there a reason your husband recommended me?"
"You came highly recommended from a friend of mine…Dany Targaryen."
"Ohh…" Irri's voice rose an octave. "Dany is one of my favorite clients…" Irri's fingers traced down the side of Arya's thigh. She had done this a few times before to get more oil, so Arya paid no mind to it. "Did you want the same treatment Dany gets?"
"Sure…" Arya sunk her head deeper into the table that cradled her face. She heard Irri wipe her hands on a towel and then her hands light graced the up Arya's legs. Umm…that's different. Irri's finger's slightly lifted the towel off her bottom. Okay, what the hell? Arya's eyes rocketed open when she felt Irri's warm hands snake up further up her thighs. "Hey-y-y-y-y," Arya said and peeked her head up, "What the fuck are you doing?" She wasn't angry, more so surprised…and maybe just a smidgen violated.
"I thought you said you wanted Dany's treatment," Irri wore a crooked, sly smile that disappeared as Arya's surprised expression didn't change.
"Is that the treatment?" Arya asked and used to the towel to cover herself.
"Ohh –"Irri's gaze went from sultry to panicked in a heartbeat. "Dany didn't tell you about my special treatment?! I thought she told you about the special treatment I offer."
"Uh-no," Arya vehemently shook her head. No, Dany and I never had a conversation about Happy Endings, she thought.
"Oh my god! I'm so sorry, I thought…I thought…that…you know…" Irri began to flail about awkwardly, Arya assumed in a panic over losing her job, or even being arrested.
"Hey, it's okay," Arya tried to calm her down. Nothing happened and the last thing she wanted was to do today was deal with this kind of panicky girl. It was a horrible feeling as all the pleasure she had absorbed melted away. "Everything's cool…" Arya said in a soothing tone, "I'll just get dressed and get outta here."
"Yeah, sure, of course…" Irri stammered and quickly glanced at her watch, "you did have another ten minutes…I could finish you off…" Irri shuddered at her choice of words, "I mean, I could finish giving you a massage…a back massage." Arya found it a little amusing this girl, who probably had control over every situation using her oozing sexuality to her advantage, melting down because of that sexuality.
"That's not necessary," Arya waved her hands swiftly in front of her. "I think I've had enough for tonight."
"Oh, okay," Irri started for the door as she spoke. "I'll let you get dressed in private…" and the door slammed behind her. When the door closed Arya sat for a moment in awe before she got dressed. What exactly do you tip the masseuse that tried to finger you, Arya chuckled to herself.
"How was the massage?" Gendry asked her when she returned from her treatment. It was about five o'clock and he had he returned home from work and he started dinner: spaghetti and meatballs Arya assumed from the alluring odor.
"…interesting…" Arya dryly responded. She assumed that Gendry didn't send her there expecting that kind of treatment, but lately she wasn't sure about anything with him.
"Interesting?" Gendry cocked an eyebrow as he stirred the noodles. "I remember Dany saying it would be mind-blowing."
"I could see Irri blowing some people's minds…"
"What? It wasn't good?"
"No, it was mostly good…" Arya sighed. "It got a little awkward at the end…"
"Why? What happened? She didn't give a happy ending?" He dryly asked and went back to work. Normally Arya would have laughed considering the terribly awkward coincidence, but it was hard for her to laugh at it with a liar. A beat or two passed in silence until Gendry popped his head up again, his head tilted in curiosity. "What?!" Gendry's eye's widened with the question. "Did she offer you a happy ending?!"
"Would you be okay with that?" Arya snarled under her breath. She regretted it, but did it anyway. She found herself more and more asking passive aggressive questions. She never liked doing it, but it kept on happening, the spiteful words kept on spewing out of her.
"Umm…" Gendry's blinked absently as he thought. "Truthfully, I've never thought about it."
"Well, think about it," Arya heard herself say. Yeah, give him shit for this. He totally meant for this to happen. He totally wanted your wonderful message to end in an awkward climax. It didn't matter though, she was mad, and he was the reason.
"Well…I guess…" Gendry mumbled. He had been doing a lot more of that lately. Arya took every possible thing the wrong way and he looked like he wanted to claw out his eyes. "Umm, I would be a little surprised and upset…"
Another moment passed as he waited for her to say something. "Are you going to ask me? You going to ask me what happened?" she pointedly asked him.
"Did something?" he asked.
"No." Arya bitterly answered. "Nothing happened."
"Oh okay," Gendry sheepishly answered and ducked back into the kitchen. "Dinner should be ready in like ten minutes."
This is where they were now. All Arya wanted to do was scream at him. Scream at him until her throat went numb, the blood vessels in her eyes burst, and all of the rage that seethed in her was finally gone. But, she didn't, she couldn't.
A few days after they got back from Sansa's wedding Arya had a particularly bad day at work. Since Tywin learned that Arya was quitting, and since he could not punish Tyrion who was in Paris on his honeymoon, his wrath was directed at Arya. She was reassigned from reception, a boring but cozy position, to Tywin's personal legal researcher. She had been told to go the basement where she and Tyrion were keeping all the Blackwater materials and organize. Arya already had them organized, but according to Tywin this was not correct. She was tempted to just quit on the spot, but since she needed the money, and didn't want to piss off one of the most prominent lawyers in the state more than she already had, so she just bit her tongue and knuckled under.
She came home that night a stressed and tired mess. Gendry was there already, happy to see her, saying he'd make dinner that night because she looked like she had a hard day. "Fuck you!" Arya distinctly remembered screaming. She was actually angry at him for being nice. What she wanted to do was scream at him and she couldn't do that if he was nice. She then proceeded to piss and moan, and scream and shout, at him for the next hour.
He barely said anything, he just stood there and took it. Sometimes he would say, "I'm sorry," but that was about it. And when he didn't stand up for himself that pissed her off even more. He was supposed to be the rat-bastard-cheating-piece-of-shit that broke her heart. She was supposed to filet him alive with her righteous fury and leave him groveling for her forgiveness. But, he wasn't that at all, he was still Gendry.
A battered and broken Gendry. For as emotionally damaged as Arya was, she knew Gendry was just as bad, but was also annihilated physically and mentally. He still wore the bruises from Sansa's wedding reception and his jaw still ached. Arya wasn't sleeping well, but he wasn't really sleeping at all. He never said it but she knew he was getting at best three hours of sleep a night. When she yelled at him that night he just stood there and took it, a totally broken and defeated man, who she still loved more than anything…and it was really fucking her shit up.
He was denying her rage. She couldn't scream at him like this. It was like kicking a dog for pissing on the floor when you left it in the house all day. The dog knew it was bad and it was ashamed of its actions, and so was Gendry. Since that night she had given up on yelling. But, the rage still remained, and the way she currently vented was by covering them all in a fog of passive aggression and that didn't help anything.
Some small part of her knew that screaming wasn't going to help and if they were going to get through this they needed to do it together. That part knew that Gendry was trying his damnedest to show how sorry he was and would do more if Arya asked him to. Arya really hated that small part for also fucking up her righteous fury.
"Gendry," Arya stopped him. "Don't. It's okay." She put her hand on his shoulder and after a little tug he turned to her. "It was just a little weird. You didn't do anything wrong."
He deeply exhaled and a small smile crossed his face for a just a moment. "Well, what happened? Did she really offer you a happy ending?"
"It was going great, really great actually…they had lavender candles and great music…" Arya gave Gendry a chance to take credit, but he didn't. "And the girl was a little chatty, but it was okay…and then she asked me if I knew Dany and I said yes…and then her hand kinda snuck up my thigh."
"What?!"
"Yeah, that was my reaction too…"Arya chuckled at the absurdity of it all. "I guess that she assumed Dany told me exactly the treatment she got and thought I wanted the same. Or maybe that's the code they use or something, they come in recommended by someone who already gets the special treatment. I don't know and I don't want to know the goings-on at the fucking place."
"Well…" Gendry was at a slight loss of words. "I guess Dany wasn't kidding when she said it was mind blowing…and how Tyrion said it was out of this world…"
"Truthfully, the whole experience was great, except for the end. It was like I was eating a delicious pepperoni pizza, and just as I finished my last slice I bit right into a piece of pineapple."
"And pineapple is someone trying to finger you?" Gendry confirmed.
"Yes," Arya surely nodded. "Pineapple is great sometimes, but not right there…although I guess some people like to have pineapple with their pizza…it isn't a perfect metaphor."
"I guess," Gendry shrugged.
"Sorry for being pissy." Arya took a deep breath and placed a slight kiss on his cheek. "I love you."
"I love you too," Gendry kissed her on the cheek as well. She did love him. But, he was still a fucking liar and rage still brewed in her stomach. She was a Mr. Coffee of Rage and at some point she was going to scald someone.
The rest of the evening followed a now familiar formula. They had dinner together and at times struggled to make conversation. Neither it seemed was in the mood for deep conversation that night so it was mostly rehashing the day's events. About an hour after dinner they decided to go work out. Since the end of Blackwater, Arya was now taking advantage of the gym membership she had neglected. Her goal was to lose the ten pounds she had gained the last year. After they returned home she spent some time looking over the book Gendry bought for her. Around nine o'clock he went to bed but she stayed up with her book and a bottle of rum. At eleven her brain was swimming in too much liquor for the words to make any sense, so she relented and went to bed.
Once upon time, before they put their relationship in the shredder, the night would have gone down very differently. She would have tiptoed into the room, slipping off articles of clothing as she went, and once she was naked she would slip into bed with him. If he was awake, he knew well enough what to do with his naked wife. If he was asleep, she would snake her hand under the covers and wake him up. But that was a long, long time ago, in a relationship that wasn't there anymore.
She still tiptoed into bed, not wanting to wake him, although when she got into the room she knew he was still awake. She quietly took off her clothes and tossed on some pajamas. She quietly slid into bed and he turned away from her. He was sleeping with his back away from her lately. She thought of asking him if he wanted to do anything, but she didn't. They hadn't done anything more than kiss, rather timidly too, since the reception. She missed him, not only for the way she felt about him once they were done, but just for the release. If she couldn't quell her rage by screaming, sex would have to do. But, she didn't touch him and he had yet to try to touch her.
That was the worst part – he wasn't even trying. After their car accident they went into a dry spell, but after a week few weeks Gendry tried some of his…smooth…moves to get something going. He still tried. Now though, it was just nothing but a back turned to her. Maybe he's not even interested anymore. Maybe he just wants her.
Arya spun away from Gendry as she loathed that woman…that slut. That same small part, that little bitch of reasonableness, told her that wasn't it. It was weird for both of them and Gendry just didn't want to push it. Things will get better. It'll just take some time…it'll just take some time. The world became dark as she fell asleep that night, in bed with her husband, but very alone.
A few days later (let's say Thursday)
"I wanna look at your laptop."
Arya broke the silence that been in the room for the last twenty minutes. She and Gendry had been sitting on the couch after dinner, with her rested legs over his lap as he gave her a foot rub. Gendry had given her foot rubs before, but now it was a part of his penance for what he did. The rubs usually lasted ten or fifteen minutes before he turned to a book or turned something on the television. Tonight though, after five minutes of rubbing and conversation, his head lulled back and he feel asleep.
Even though things between them had gotten better over the week sleep still eluded Gendry. He said it wasn't just relationship stuff, but work shit too. This week was his company's yearly reviews and his had gotten bumped from Tuesday afternoon to Friday morning, giving him a three extra days to brood over it. Tomorrow he had to go into work, wear a tie on causal Friday, and talk about himself a bunch- everything about that statement just ruffled his feathers. So, Arya kept her feet comfortably on his lap and let him get some more sleep.
Arya reached for a book she had on the coffee table when she saw his laptop just sitting there. It was just sitting there, a small black box that was filled with so much. The black shine of the plastic taunted her with possible paranoid scenario her mind could conjure. Maybe he was e-mailing Her. Maybe he was e-mailing someone else. He had been certainly doing something on that computer, something he didn't want to her to see. Without another thought she turned to him and said "I wanna look at your laptop."
"Huh?" Gendry's head shook as he woke up. He stared at her in a confused daze as he waited for clarification.
"I want to see your computer," Arya repeated. "You password locked it. I want to see it." It wasn't a reasonable demand or maybe it was. Even it was she didn't want to be reasonable. She wanted to know everything and she wanted to know now.
Gendry's face twisted at the question, which was actually a demand. Arya wanting to see his laptop, his secrets, excited him as much as a goldfish being told he'll be taken out of water for a minute or ten. "You mean, you want me to login, and you want to look at my stuff?"
"Actually, I want your password," she corrected. She didn't want that damn computer taunting her anymore and the only way to do that was to unlock forever. "I wanna see everything you've been looking at."
"There isn't much there…" Gendry shrugged. "It wouldn't be that interesting…"
Arya felt her body tense at his dismissal. "You don't get to make that choice," she informed him. "Let me look at your laptop."
"Okay," he sighed. He picked the laptop up from the table and gave it to her. "My password is Krillin rules eight, all one word, all caps, and there is a Z in rules."
Arya rolled her eyes at such a nerdy ass password separated her from the truth. She typed it in and Gendry began to walk out of the room. "Where are you going?" Arya asked, a little annoyed he was leaving.
"You can read that stuff," he said. "But, I don't wanna be here well you read it. Way-y-y-y too awkward…" He stood for a moment in thought. "And, when you go through my favorites and find the blog post I did, just know I was confused and didn't know what to do."
"Is there anything else I should expect? Any e-mails or messages…" Arya pointedly asked.
"No," Gendry growled. She could see is fist tightened and his eyes grow cold. "I never e-mailed Bella after I kissed her. I've only talked to her at work when I couldn't avoid it. I told you already. I don't want to tell you again." His last words were painfully wrapped in spite. "Once you login you can remove the password. Just don't delete anything." After he finished Gendry left the room and notably closed the bedroom door behind him.
Arya logged into the laptop and began to dig. Searching through his files there were no word documents of interest or anything else besides World of Warcraft on his desktop. She opened Firefox and found a trove in his favorites. There was a list of at least twenty different relationship websites, all of them centering on cheating. Some sites were relationship blogs, others were mental health sites, but every site was all cheating and most of them were about what to do afterwards. One particular blog post that he favorite caught her eye.
Subject: Do I tell my wife I kissed another woman?
Posted by: anonymous-stupid-person
I've never posted anything like this before so sorry if I seem like a spaz. I'm a twenty-something guy and have been married for a little over three years now. My wife and have been together since we are teens and have been friends since childhood. In early 2007 my wife got offered a job at a law firm. She's always wanted to be a lawyer, and loathed her old job, so I told her go for it. What started out as a forty hours a week job turned into a sixty and then eighty hours a week. I barely saw her and when I did she was a total zombie. During that time I started a friendship with a co-worker. It started totally platonic but as my wife pulled away I found myself more and more going to her for emotional support. In retrospect I fully admit I was having an 'emotional affair' with this co-worker (well my wife was having an 'emotional affair' or something like that with her job, but two wrongs really don't make a right.). But that's not my problem. How I wish that was just my problem.
The other day I had a...Emotional...emergency and instead of turning to my wife I turned to my friend. She talked me 'off the ledge' whereas my wife wasn't there. I didn't try to call her more than once, because frankly I didn't think she would answer. The next day I kissed my friend in what I now call the 'dumbest fucking thing' I've ever done. And when I was a kid I microwaved some chicken wrapped in tin foil. I think my wife is starting to disconnect from her job and wants to get things back on track with me, but I literally kissed another woman two days ago. It was just one kiss, no tongue (does that matter?), and I have since cut ties with the friend. I'm not sure how I'll deal with work – but getting a new job is probably an option. For all intents and purposes the kiss was a one time thing and all ties have been cut.
Anyways my question – do I tell my wife? Things are pretty strange between us right now and this would be the worst time to tell her this...then again when would be a good time? My wife is totally aware of the relationship I had with the friend, but for the kiss. Do I just keep it a secret or do I tell her?
Did he really post his problem online? Arya thought to herself. Did he really think this was going to help? She understood why, besides a drunken Tyrion Lannister and apparently her father, Gendry told her he spoke to no one about this. She understood that it must have eaten him alive…but did he have to be so lame? For all the trolls on the internet there could be some nuggets of wisdom she realized. However, it was still incredibly dorky. She scrolled down to the comments and saw a smorgasbord of opinions. Some people were constructive and said he should tell, some people said he shouldn't because it wouldn't help, and some people told him he was a fucking asshole who deserved no mercy. Arya decided to leave her own comment.
Posted by: No One
Yeah, you screwed up, it happens. It sounds like you and your wife were in a bad place. Just keep on trying to win her back. She's probably just as confused and fucked up as you are – if not more so. Just endure and you'll make it through.
Arya had mixed feelings about what she saw. On one hand it was clear he was searching for something, anything, to make things better. When she tabbed to his history she saw even more sites and even more stories. He was looking everywhere for advice and wisdom to make this better. But, on the other hand, he wasn't sharing any of this with her. When they did forwardly talk about their problems he had been cagey and short with detail. She just wished she could be as open with her as he was with strangers online.
Later that night Arya again found herself in bed lying next to her husband and for a change she was the one unable to sleep. Gendry had been trying to avoid OTC sleep aides, fearing dependency and the groggy mornings that followed. However, the following morning he had his performance review, so he downed a tiny cup brimming with NyQuil and hoped to get some sleep. After she went through his laptop he had been very distant, clearly uncomfortable with her looking through his stuff. She wanted to talk to him about it, but decided to wait a few days until he was more comfortable and she'd actually get a response out of him.
It had been a good day for them. Compared to recent days she barely wanted to scream and besides being awkward about the laptop and being worried about work tomorrow Gendry seemed okay. He lay limply next to her, flat on his back, loudly snoring. Arya couldn't have been further from limp. It was two in the morning but she kept on tossing and turning. Not to mention it took all of her energy keep her arms still. Something was wrong with her – some people may have said she had restless leg, a hundred years ago they would have said she had Hysteria, but she knew the truth.
She was just plain horny.
It had been over a three weeks since they last had sex. For glaring obvious reasons neither had been in the mood since Sansa's wedding. However, that didn't mean Arya didn't still want to. Even though she was angry at him, she still saw him naked, a lot. One of her favorite parts of the morning lately was right after Gendry got out of the shower. Since Arya had her days free to study she would stay in bed later and would watch him stroll back into their room naked after his shower. In fact the other morning, after he left, she spent most of the morning in bed; just her, thinking of him, and two of her fingers.
It was great, but it wasn't enough. She missed him so much. She missed the way he made her feel about herself. That when she was with him she felt like a goddess: powerful and sexy, able to do anything and everything. Most of all she missed the release. The time they shared together when it was just the two of them, where their problems didn't matter, and serenity she found at the end. They had solved so many stupid problems, avoided a lot of stupid arguments, and cleansed themselves of so many shitty days with each other. How was this any different? She thought.
She had no idea how Gendry was surviving this dry spell. To her knowledge he had not found any release since the wedding…unless of course he was taking care of that business at work or something. She doubted it though, he was probably just as pent up as she was. She knew he needed sleep, but she knew he needed this too. They both needed this. It wouldn't fix everything, but it would make it so much better. They wouldn't have to old back anymore and maybe it would even make things less awkward.
Okay, fuck this she thought to herself as she rolled over to Gendry and ripped the blankets off of both of them. Surprisingly, Gendry remained a sleeping lump on the bed. Damn, NyQuil took his ass down. I'll just have to work harder, she mischievously thought and inwardly cackled. "Gendry…" she purred into his ear and slithered her hand into his pants. Her finger's danced on his flaccid member as she coaxed him up – figuratively and literally.
"Huh?" Gendry moaned and in the dark room Arya could see his eyes open. "Arya? What's goin' on?"
"I miss you," she whispered into his ear.
"Miss you too…" he groaned and seemed surprised when her lips crushed into his. Her hand stayed busy at work as her tongue jutted into his mouth. His reactions were slowed, but after a moment he groaned…oh that sexy, lusty, desperate, groan she missed…and wrapped his arm around her and grabbed her ass.
"Yes," she moaned into his mouth. Everything was going to plan…except for one small problem. He wasn't getting hard. She softly squeezed, she rubbed, and gently ran her nails all over, all the things he loved. But, nothing, at least not enough. The technical term was probably a 'semi' or a 'floppy.' To Arya, it wasn't enough.
"What…" Arya muttered, trying not to ruin the moment. "Something wrong?"
"I'm…okay…" he sputtered. In the dark it was hard to make out his expression, but his tone was weak, and confused. Arya tried harder, her lips moved faster again his, her grip got harder, and mind grew more frantic. What the fuck…what the fuck…whatthefuckwhatthefuck!
This couldn't be happening…this had never happened before. This wasn't supposed to happen. He was supposed to ravage her, she was supposed scream out his name and pass out on his chest, and they were supposed to go back to the way things were. This was supposed to make things better. In that moment, that small piece of reasonableness inside Arya that had gained some strength over the last few days instantly vanished and then everything she was holding back burst through.
Arya flipped to her bed side table and turned on her lamp. "What the fuck is going on!?" she yelled, more angrily than she intended.
"I…don't know…" he mumbled. His eyes were bloodshot, his expression was lost, and with the covers ripped off him she could still see his limp little dick resting on his thigh.
"What? You can't even get it up for me!" She yelled much, much louder than she should have.
"I don't…" Gendry continued, "this hasn't happened before…I…"
"Is it because I'm not Her?! I'm not that stupid fucking slut!?"
"It has nothing to do with her," Gendry shot back and then quietly added. "And she's not a fucking slut."
"Don't you dare fucking defend her!" She yelled as rage finally freely flowed from her. "You know what!? Get the fuck out of here. I don't want to sleep with you tonight."
Arya wished she hadn't turned on the light because then she wouldn't have to see the pained face Gendry made at her demand. "Oh, okay…" Gendry muttered, picked up his tossed away clothes and staggered out of the bedroom. She waited until she heard the door close in the guest bedroom before she turned out her light. She rolled to her side and hated everything. He doesn't even want to fuck me anymore, she thought to herself as she felt tears begin to fall down her face.
To be continued…
(Duh)
AN: I have to thank Crogos and Ellie-Oh for both helping me out with this chapter. Their point of view and willingness to look over my gibberish is invaluable.
Eight more words to 9,000. Almost there. Almost there. Ohh, crap. Too many. Now it's over 9,000...what a shame.
Next time - In college, Gendry catches Arya reading his journal. In the present, Arya and Gendry try a different approach to their relationship - again with mixed results. Also, a discussion about eating peanut butter out of the jar and how it might be rock bottom.
