Tony heard the knock at the door and swore there would be a dead man on the carpet if it was Gibbs coming again. He sighed as he pressed the handle, ready for sweet murder.
''Tim ?''
''Hey. Hi, Tony.''
''H-Hi Tim...please, come inside'' Tony said, surprised to see him in front of his place. ''Do you...do you need anything ? Wine, water...uh, cocoa ?''
He discreetly slapped his own forehead as he closed the door, feeling stupid. Cocoa...it was as much dumb to propose so to McGee than to propose him a glass of wine.
''Water is fine'' Tim expectedly answered, walking in the living room's direction.
''So...'' Tony started speaking again once in the kitchen, seems like there are quite a lot of visits, recently...''
''You mean Gibbs ?''
''And Ziva, too, the other day. Didn't know I was that famous. Hey, listen...'' he added, noticing Tim polite smile, ''I really meant to visit you, I just...you know, with work and everything...''
''You mean the fact that you are not working with us anymore ?''
''Yeah. But...''
''It's okay, Tony. I know you've been visiting me'' Tim said as he sat down. ''I just wasn't really conscious to enjoy it.''
''Yeah'' Tony uselessly repeated, briefly chuckling. ''So...you wanted to see me, McGee ?''
''Oh, yes'' Tim suddenly strangely exclaimed, taken out of his reverie. ''I have something for you.''
'Not again...' Tony thought, remembering, himself, Gibbs previous words.
''Tony ?''
''Uh ?''
''I was saying I had something for you.''
''Oh, true.''
''You know what ? Here it is.''
Tony welcomed the small fancy bag between both hands, curious. He pulled it out and discovered the name on the bottle.
''Côte de Brouilly...''
''Quite hard to pronounce, isn't it ?'' Tim asked, smiling again.
''Definitely ! But...that's a beautiful bottle, Tim...''
''I know you're into Italian ones, but I thought some French wine wouldn't hurt your tastes.''
''Obviously not...'' Tony said, almost speechless. ''So...no love card with the present ?'' he nervously added, as if to hide how touched he was. ''I tell you, Tim, if you ask me to marry you...''
''What if I asked you to come back to NCIS ?''
Silence heavily weighed on the whole place right after Tim's question, both former and present Special Agents now feeling very tense. Tony tried to look away but Tim's eyes were on him, scared but insistent.
''Tim...''
''What, Tony ?'' he asked, calmly. ''For how long are we gonna pretend ?''
''Pretend ?''
''Yeah,'' he continued, standing up and facing him, ''pretend that you didn't save my life and put your own, including your reputation freedom, at risk ? I had lost too much blood to think straight about any name, but I know how to recognize a face, especially one I have been working with for years."
"Tim..."
"I need you, Tim. We need you. Tony, I...I killed someone. That girl, pretending to be Abby.''
''You had no choice, Tim.''
''And I...I don't want to talk about it with anyone else, but you. I've already had to deal with interrogations, to tell and retell that same awful story of mine, but when it comes to...friends,'' he dared saying, ''I know who I want to talk to about it.''
''You can still tell Ziva, or...Gibbs'' he commented, although he wasn't believing his very last word. ''You have Ducky and Palmer, too...''
''I want you, Tony. You saved my life, and I want you to be by my side so I can thank you everyday of my life for what you've done.''
''Tim...''
Tony nervously rubbed his neck, trying holding the tears threatening to leave his eyes, knowing that wasn't the kind of speech Tim was usually sharing with him. No, usual talks were made of unstoppable easing, especially coming from him, movie quotes and incessant jokes, not always the worst work atmosphere ever, alright, but not something that emotional. He wished he could have hugged him right now, but he couldn't give him a wrong message by doing so.
''Tony,'' Tim calmly continued, approaching closer. ''You killed Mark Pierce. You saved NCIS, you should be rewarded and thanked by all for what you did...come back, please, I'm sure we can make things work in order to have you back.''
The former NCIS agent rubbed his neck again and looked away, now feeling way too emotional. He didn't like that. To look vulnerable. And now McGee was the one making his heart melt...that was something. He slowly breathed in and out, finally facing his former colleague, but actual friend.
''Tim...'' he started saying for the umpteenth time, sincerely smiling.
''Yes, Tony ?''
''I'm sorry.''
The huge silent went back to the room and they both felt tense as hell, Tim still soundlessly waiting for a decision that would help him deal with everyday, the one saying Tony would come back and things would be difficult for some time, but then get better, as they would be altogether again, part of this amazing team he had always known...
''Screw Gibbs'' Tim suddenly broke the ice, not believing his own words. He seemed to be looking for apologies for a brief instant, but then renounced, strangely confident about what he had just dared saying. ''Yeah, screw Gibbs. You know what ? He messed up ! Obviously I'm not aware of every details, as I wasn't always here to know them...''
''Tim, it is more complicated than that...''
''You think I don't know that, Tony ? He's always been like a father to you, yeah, even if you never really admitted it. I know he's not like your 'perfect role model', but you've always trusted him and wished to stay by his side, no matter what, so if you got to the point that you didn't want, or even couldn't deal with him anymore, that must have been because he has messed up.''
''Tim, we can't even exchange a word without wanting to punch each other, or be agressive.''
''Then don't come back for him !'' Tim almost begged. ''Come back for Ducky, Palmer, Ziva, Abby, and me !''
''You kept the best for last'' Tony nervously commented and chuckled, trying making a joke in order to hide his feelings again.
''Tony, we gave our lives for NCIS, so we deserve to be important. Now please say yes'' he said, his voice lowering a bit.
Tony heavily exhaled and faced him deeply, thoughts invading his mind at an incredible pace, telling him he should truly considered what had just been told and carefully explained...Tim's speech had been amazing, but could still he still be part of NCIS, was he ready to be back to the bullpen, knowing he had been betrayed and badly treated in so many ways and so many times during that insane case, and this, even for McGee and the rest of the team ?
''Tony, say something, please.''
The older agent painfully swallowed, eyes wet, thinking and rethinking about all these numerous elements, knowing he knew now how he felt, even after Tim's beautiful words.
''I'm sorry, McGee. But...I can't.''
''Tony.''
''I'm really sorry, Tim, but I can't go back to NCIS. This is...too painful.''
