Carl had to admit the plan was good but the fault was that it was going to be short lived so they would have to move fast. At first the youth wanted to go in because he was smaller and quicker, but Michonne wouldn't hear it as she shoved the caged rat into the slumbering dead and then followed on Carl's heels to the side door. They quickly walked inside, Michonne keeping her sword low but unsheathed as they slunk past the distracted Walkers and towards Carl's destination. Carl jumped onto counter and snatched something from the top before tucking it away. He nodded to Michonne who started to head back when a Walker saw her and slowly advanced, the others found the scent and turned leaving the petrified caged rat. Michonne motioned in the other direction and Carl saw another side door, they ran it Carl got there first and flung it open ushering Michonne through before passing through himself and slamming the door shut. The windows rattled in the frame with such force and Michonne quickly bound it together with rope before stepping back. The Walkers pushed ominously against the door as it groaned against the pressure.
"Come on," Michonne said touching Carl on the shoulder. The youth turned back and nodded following the woman down the street away from the restaurant.
A little ways down Carl withdrew the picture and looked down at the picture see his mom on one side and his dad on the other. He felt a pain wrap around his heart and beat along with the rhythm, the youth wanted the pain to go away but it just stayed there, it didn't squeeze or make him catch his breath – it just remained.
Michonne saw the pained expression on the youth's face and stopped.
"I want Judith to know what her mom looks like," Carl finally whispered feeling a hoarse tickle run up his throat. Tears welled in his eyes but Carl took in a breath willing himself to be still and not break down. His thoughts went back to what Rick had said, I promised your mother I wouldn't let you die. Was he possibly there when Judith was born? Did he deliver the finishing blow?
For a while Carl was avoiding these questions and for a reason. To save himself from pain. He thought that the less he knew the better it would be to coup with everything going on around him, but as soon as he had stepped into the prison events revolved around his mother's passing, then it switched to his father's delusional episodes and then the Governor. Carl was squeezed in whenever possible but it was only for brief moments until something else came up that drew everyone's attention. Carl didn't mind though, he knew that Lori had impacted the group, Rick was the leader and the Governor threatened them all. However the conclusion was pent up emotions that could only be let out by bursts of random violence.
Carl turned away. He couldn't have told Merle because he knew that in reply he would have a curt reply that wouldn't answer his question in the first place or a mild threat. At Woodbury it was even worse, everyone acting like they cared like they understood his emotions when probably faced with one of the situations they would run and hide. Andrea was probably the only one who cared, but with her it started to get finicky as she became attached to the Governor.
"You alright?"
Carl looked up at Michonne who regarded the youth with a neutral look.
"Yeah…," the youth answered. A sheathed sword blocked his way along with the word: "Bullshit."
Carl gave a small sigh pushing his hat down he pushed the sword out of the way and continued to walk back towards the building. He silently chastised himself for not speaking up, the opportunity was there but he had pushed it away. Was that it? Was it because the youth wouldn't accept help? Living with only one person for months on end, taking care of himself and growing up fast made Carl think that he had to do everything on his own include solving his own problems.
"You sure you're alright?"
Carl stopped and looked out of the corner of his eye. Michonne was there, standing with the same expression she had yet opened up another opportunity. Carl turned to face her unsure of what to say, he saw a ghost of concern pass her face and nothing else, it seemed that she didn't want to jump to conclusions.
"It happened a long time ago."
There was silence then….
"I killed someone."
XXXXXX
The two headed back to the building, Carl slowly told Michonne what had happened pausing wondering how much he should tell but eventually giving her more and more information. He told him about Atrox and his group, the bad blood between Atrox and Merle and the final confront they had in the small town. Michonne listened interrupting only to clarify a few things.
They came to the corner when Carl stopped and turned to Michonne.
"My dad doesn't know."
Michonne raised an eyebrow seeing where the youth was going with this. She straightened facing the youth.
"You can't tell him," Carl continued, "I will tell him when I'm ready."
"You can't wait forever on something like that," Michonne countered, "and this already happened ten months ago Carl."
"I know and I want to tell him, I mean I am going to tell him."
Michonne didn't look too convinced and Carl didn't blame her.
"Don't put it off too long," Michonne warned.
The youth bowed his head feeling the fierce woman's eyes lay on him for a few more beats before looking up.
"Let's go check up on Rick."
Inside the room Carl was surprised to see Rick and Morgan both up, each were standing a couple inches away from each other and a defiant glare etched deep. Michonne only took one look before deciding it was useless and cleared her throat getting both their attentions. Morgan turned ready to demand who she was when his eyes fell on the youth.
"Oh my god," he whispered.
Carl walked around Michonne so that Morgan can see that he wasn't going crazy. The solo survivor knelt down and raised a hand to Carl's face as if to touch it but he suddenly blinked, lowering his hand.
"Hey."
Carl nodded, "hi."
Rick watched closely, his hand hovering over his Colt pistol just in case, he had seen Morgan's erratic behaviour and he didn't want Carl to get hurt. He looked at his son and saw the hardness in his eye that the leader had grown used to but there was something different about his expression; knowing.
"You came back," Carl said. "Survivors' moved out?"
"They got eaten," Morgan answered.
"Heavy weapons were probably more an intimidation factor."
Morgan cracked a small smile. "Yeah…"
Rick ran a hand through his hair watching the scene unfold before him Michonne was a bit surprised that the two were making small talk. She spotted the bit of cloth that was covering up a wound on Rick's shoulder and knew that the first encounter didn't go so well wondering what would've happened if Carl stayed.
A couple hours passed, Morgan stitched up the stab wound he had inflicted on Rick. Michonne stayed close to keeping an eye on Morgan just to be safe. Carl stayed close to looking over the weapons from the fifteen assault rifles to the box filled with grenades.
"Take as much as you want," Morgan said, "for your fight with this Governor."
"We'll leave some for you," Carl responded.
"Sounds like this guy knows what he's doing."
"Just another narcissist," Michonne scowled.
"A narcissist who knows what he's doing and trust me there nothing worse."
"Can I talk to Morgan in private?" Carl blurted.
All three adults straightened it was obvious that Rick wanted a damn good explanation for why Carl would want to do something. Morgan gave his head a small shake for he knew what the youth wanted to ask but also possibly questioning from Rick later on. Rick looked back to Michonne who merely looked back letting him know that it was completely up to him. He looked back at Carl to see the same knowing expression linger and Rick sent Morgan a suspicious look.
"I'll wait outside."
Both waited until Rick left, Michonne lingered for a few seconds before turning back outside the door. Carl turned back to Morgan who was sitting on the air mattress. He looked up at the youth but his eyes went downcast.
"I lost it," the youth muttered.
Morgan looked up wondering what he was talking about.
"The Gameboy."
"Oh…," Morgan blinked at first not understanding what the youth was trying to get at, then he realized that Carl was having a bit of a hard time asking the question directly. That was the setup, next would be the strike.
"Were you able to do it?"
"…yeah…took me a while though."
There was a silence but neither survivor was uncomfortable each seemed content with the silence but knew that it had to be broken at some point. So Carl took his cue.
"Come with us," he blurted.
Morgan shook his head. "I can't go with you."
"What? Why not?"
"I'm not ready."
Carl bowed his head feeling a familiar pit draw up inside.
"I don't want to be alone."
Morgan straightened clearly perplexed by Carl's words. He couldn't help but look to the door wondering if Rick was on the other side. He looked back to Carl who looked back up from the ground.
"You can't be hard on them Carl," Morgan said, "they haven't been through what you have, and you haven't been through what they have."
The youth rubbed the back of his neck as he lowered himself onto the ground. "The communication between my group and I haven't been so good. There's a lot going on."
"You have to make someone list-."
"No, it's me."
Morgan blinked, "you?"
Carl nodded. "Some ask but I avoid it, all of it. I don't know why it…it's just impulse."
Morgan leaned in to the youth. "What happened?"
"A lot."
XXXXXX
Rick waited impatiently outside from pacing like a caged animal to being as still as a statue. Numerous thoughts ran through his head all at once as he thought why it was taking so long. He didn't like Morgan's attitude it was too erratic and uncomforting.
Michonne watched the agitated leader closely even she had to admit that she was a bit anxious. She wondered if he was telling Morgan about Atrox which would explain why it was taking so long but she knew that he was hiding something else. The woman inclined her head before looking from one side to the other.
The door opened and both went ramrod taking a couple steps to the door. Carl walked out first making Rick give a sigh of relief, the youth adjusted his hat to shade his eyes more then held the door open as Morgan walked out with a couples bags filled with weaponry. Rick looked in surprise at the two filled bags that the survivor was carrying.
"Where do you want it?" Morgan asked.
Michonne stepped forward and took the two bags, Morgan handed them off easily then walked around with his bowie knife stabbing the trapped Walkers. Rick walked over to Carl and placed a hand on his shoulder.
"Are you alright?"
Carl nodded. "Yeah."
Rick didn't look too convinced but decided to drop it even though it pained him. He watched Carl walk back to the car with Michonne, turning back to Morgan Rick wondered if he should talk to Carl a bit more just some general things and then ask a bit more of the things that his son may be hiding from him.
XXXXXX
At the prison everyone was impressed with the variety of weaponry brought as they started to line up the weapons on the table. While everything was being set up and organized Rick asked where Daryl and Carol were only to get a shocking reply.
"Hunting?!" the leader exclaimed.
Even Carl blinked thrice wondering if he heard right, Carol hunting? Didn't exactly sound right and wondered what Sophia thought about it. The young girl admitted that it was strange but gave no real opinion.
Carl looked around to see Merle out of the group which was usual except for an odd look on his face. The youth set down the shotgun and walked over to the redneck.
"So how was the trip?" Merle asked.
"We met Morgan."
A dark look spread across the redneck's face he scowled as he rose to his feet.
"You remember him don't you?" Carl asked.
"The fucker who tried to chop me up?"
"Yeah."
"Still messed over his dead son?"
Carl bowed his head and Merle gave a snort.
"He's trying though and we're going to welcome him if he decides to come to the prison."
"Yer ain't telling me who to welcome and who not to boy!"
"He put Duane down, so it's not like he's going to drag a dead boy in tow."
Merle grumbled something but Carl ignored him giving a small sigh knowing that he'd have a better time convincing Hershel if the medic knew the whole story. The youth sat down at the table and rested his head in his arms, even though he was tired he felt oddly light – like he was able to move a bit better, stand taller.
"You told him didn't you?"
Carl jumped a bit and turned to Merle who had a rare solemn expression, his eyes held Carl's and it was clear that the youth wasn't going to get out unless he gave a straight answer.
"Michonne," Carl corrected, "I can't tell my dad."
"Yer afraid of something boy?"
"I can't tell him…not yet."
"Yer really think that Michonne gonna keep a secret?"
I hope so…Carl thought but didn't say it aloud. Rather he rose from the chair and walked down the hall and turned the corner.
XXXXXX
The youth need air, somewhere where he could clear his mind and just be alone. He followed the hallway down and turned coming across a large blood splatter where the female Walker he had encountered used to be. Carl thought that one of the guys had taken it away to burn the youth looked around to see the fallen wall and the chunks that was stained with his blood. Carl touched his nose as if expecting it to still be broken, he let out a small breath thinking how silly it is to think that.
Carl walked to the open back area of the prison, climbed over the broken wall and slid down on the other side. He walked into the forest feeling the slight breeze run over his face and nearly topple over his hat. He looked around to see no one in view which he thought was good. His mind went to Morgan, the tortured father stuck in his old neighbourhood. Also about his house which burned in a fire, the house that he had grown up in for twelve years gone just like that Carl wondered what his father was thinking when he heard that – what his mom would think.
The youth walked along the small clear path mulling something over, trying to decide what to do. He rolled his shoulder's feelings the muscles stretch.
You have to trust the people in your group.
Morgan's words echoed in Carl's mind making the youth stop. He gave a small sigh, he did he trusted Michonne but why? Because she was new and that it would take her more time to convince the others that she was telling the truth if she did decide to tell. Why not Carol? Or even Hershel if not Rick.
You haven't been through what they have.
Carl thought back to the jagged scar on Sophia's arm and closed his eyes. What else have they been through? Does he have to open up more and in exchange they will talk back? Is that how it works? Telling them about Atrox would be tough but telling them about Elias would be even worse.
Something crunched in the distance catching Carl's attention he whipped around and scanned the area. Slowly unclipped his gun and raised it, the branches moved off to his right and Carl quickly turned ready to shoot when a voice called out: "Wait!"
Carl straightened as the voice was familiar and he gapped as Beth came through the branches carrying a bundle of firewood tied together.
"Beth?" the youth was surprised to see her here.
"Someone needed to go out and get more wood for tonight everyone else seemed busy so I volunteered."
Carl re-holstered his gun still a bit surprised to see Beth off prison boundaries usually she would hang around Carol taking care of Judith and if she wanted a breather she would go on the platforms outside. Beth started to head back to the prison and Carl followed knowing that if he didn't get back his father would be livid.
"What are you doing out here anyway?" Beth asked.
"Just needed to get some air," Carl answered.
"All the way out here?"
Carl felt himself being cornered and he quickly added: "and to hunt some Walkers."
Beth made a face. "Why would you want to do that?"
"I miss it," Carl admitted.
"Miss killing Walkers?"
The youth nodded refusing to say any more. Beth didn't pretend to understand just looked up and continued towards the prison. Carl side glanced Beth wondering if he could tell her, she looked like someone who would take what Carl had to say to heart and never bring it up again. Just listen and not question. Carl gave a small sigh and turned when he felt his heart drop. Beth saw his expression change quickly.
"What's wrong?" Beth asked.
Carl looked past her, he narrowed his eyes.
"I think that's someone...seems familiar..."
Beth turned to see a man in a hat push branches out of his way behind him were a few younger people who looked less confident. The Hispanic looked up and met the young woman's stare then saw Carl.
"Run!"
Beth dropped the firewood and drew out her gun she cover fired as Carl took the lead and then followed herself. Bullets rained on the two, zipping past missing their mark by millimetres and slamming into trees showering the two with splinters. The two continued running back tracking, stopping momentarily to try and figure out which way and dodged Walkers the best they could.
Carl whipped around and fired some bullets scattering the enforcers. Beth looked back and urged Carl to run rather than shoot, as she was about to turn back something clipped her heel sending her flying into a tree. A sickening crack echoed in the air making Carl stop in his tracks. He watched to see the young woman struggle to her feet, blood rivulets rolling down her trembling hands as she tried to limp to safety but the enforcers caught up to them in no time. Two surrounded Beth while Martinez turned his direct attention to the youth.
"What are you doing here?" Carl demanded.
"You're not in any position to make demands boy," Martinez snapped.
Carl looked over to see Beth being pinned against the tree, a blade pressed harshly against her throat and a blood line was already drawn making her wince. Carl looked back at Martinez who raised his hand out the youth, the message was simple. The youth fingered his gun feeling something in the back of his mind want him to raise his gun and fire.
"I give you the gun you let us go," Carl tried still holding the gun.
Martinez shook his head. "You actually made our job a lot easier for us you know."
Carl did a double take.
"The girl is a bit of a surprise though. Not sure if the Governor wants us to bring along extras or n-."
"Leave her alone!" Carl interrupted stepping forward but someone tackled him from the side. He let out a low moan as he clutched the bruise that started to form his fingers trembled on the welling lump. The gun was yanked from his weakened grip despite Carl's best efforts. A string of curses burst followed quickly by a feverish apology. He felt himself being lifted and another hand pressed against his wound causing him to cry out in pain.
"Fuck the Governor didn't want us to harm Carl," Martinez snapped.
"What about the girl?"
There was a tense pause, the youth looked over at Beth who didn't look so well bits of her hair were glued to her forehead with sweat, she had a sickly pale complexion and blood already stained her front.
"Bring her along," Martinez finally decided after what seemed like eternity. "If the Governor wants to send her back I'll make a personal trip."
Carl immediately fought as a pair of arms wrapped around his shoulders in a tight bear hug, despite his attempts he was easily dragged along back to the jeep.
A/N: Not my best chapter mind you but next will be better. Spitfire47
