Author's Notes: Yeah, I know Petrine's second weapon as a paladin is an axe. However, I don't want to overshadow Patrick's character, so I changed it to swords. Why? You'll just have to read on.

Also... hahaha... because I was a day late to file my Financial Aid form, I lost my full scholarship. I don't know if it's just for the semester or entirely. I was sorta too much in shock to actually clarify it. It really sucks because when I went to submit it on the actual day it was due, the site seemed to be experiencing downtime and I wasn't able to submit it when it was due.

I'm honestly at a loss for words right now as to this. In a way, a great burden's lifted because that means I can take a semester off to find a job and pay my credit card and stuff off, as well as save up money for getting a new car. Driving my car is like playing a game of Russian Roulette, as I always jokingly said (not exactly true, but it's a piece of crap that I've sunk more money into it in repairs than the actual cost of the car).

It also means I can quit freaking the hell out over getting ready for my upcoming piano audition. On the downside, it means I will have to work a bit harder to get the money to pay for college. On the upside, it means I can take my time for my major and not have to break down at the end of every semester with every class's "big assignment" when I'm taking eighteen credits every semester.

Also, without a girlfriend or college or a steady job to tie me down here in southern New Jersey, I am free to move out.

I may go on a hiatus after this chapter... maybe. Honestly, losing this scholarship hasn't been all that good for me. Also, two of my closest friends are leaving to Florida for college in less than a week, so I also have that. In addition, I gotta go to the college quite a few times and try to make ends meet. I'm also job hunting. I quit the job with my step-father as a painter. I'm sorry, but that's just too much for me. It's a tough, demanding job and I feel drained every day I come home... and my piano teacher gets on my case for not practicing enough.

Also, possibly arranging Christmas music for my high school band to play. Always fun.

Chapter 49:

The Conversation and the Proposition

It has been two days since the beginning of the spying mission on the Daein camp. As I requested Petrine, I asked that I shower alone. She was most gracious in granting my request.

I asked for obvious reasons.

Petrine said she had arranged for my training in bows by one of her men and that she herself would be sword training me. According to her, since I'm new with the weapon, I need a true expert who can guide me to becoming a gifted sword wielder and "slay more Crimeans" according to her.

I thought she used lances?

Anyway, it's the morning of the second day and I was to begin my training. The first day was awkward, getting weird stares from the guys in camp. Soren, I'm going to kill you for making me look this good. I'm supposed to be spying. I can't be spying if I have people watching me.

Did that get through his head?

So, my first archery lesson was to begin at this target range that was at the edge of the camp. We had a few days to kill before we were to move out to the bridge on the Daein and Crimea border. I walked to where my lesson was supposed to be and was greeted by a most unpleasant sight.

My teacher was Shinon.

Of all people, why did it have to be that red-haired bastard? That fucking foul filthy traitor that ran away for power and glory and money is now my archery teacher.

"So, Sophia, Petrine has commanded me to be your archery teacher. She said you're new at this," Shinon recounted, eating a bowl of soup and sitting lazily on a crate.

"Yeah, it is an honor to be working with you, General Shinon," I said.

I think I died a bit on the inside.

"No need for formalities, girl," I cringed on the inside in whatever was left in there. "Just call me Shinon."

"It's fine, General. I honestly don't mind," I said. First name terms with that bastard? No.

"Okay, here's a bronze bow. Show me what you can do," Shinon said. With a sigh, I walked over and picked up the bow. It was so light! I got into stance just like Rolf taught me. Using everything Rolf taught me, I held the bow in a certain place, pulled just right, and let the arrow fly. It wasn't a bull's eye but it hit the target.

"Interesting... looks like you were taught," Shinon said.

"I had a teacher for a short time in the Crimean camp," I replied.

"Interesting that he should be your teacher," Shinon said to himself.

"What?" I asked, my curiosity overcoming my hate.

"Was your teacher Rolf of the Greil Mercenaries?" Shinon asked.

"Yes, it was," I replied. I couldn't lie there. He'd probably catch me.

"He taught you well," Shinon said, a small smile playing across his face.

"That he did," I said.

"Looks like you know the basics. Makes my job easier. I'll be here to teach you how to shoot more advanced bows properly, to correct your stance, and to make sure you develop," he said "develop" while looking me over, "properly."

"Thank you, sir," I said in reply, the hate for him returning.

Training with Shinon wasn't so bad this time around, although that was probably because I was someone he could tolerate. Not to mention, being a girl may have its benefits. He may be a bastard, but I'll be damned if he didn't know exactly what he was talking about. He could probably pick up anything shaped like a bow, shoot it perfectly, and be more efficient than the typical Daein archer.

Shinon also started teaching me how to make my own bows. He explained that a true archer always makes their own weapons. I guess it's like how oboe players make their own reeds. Anyway, according to him, in the heat of combat, the worst thing that could happen is a malfunctioning or bad bow. If you make your own bow, you yourself know of the quality of the bow being used.

After bow training came the part that I was least interested in going. Ever since Ji—er, Guinivere told Petrine we were from the Crimean army, she arranged to have dinner with each of us to get to know us better. Beforehand, Guinivere and I came up with our cover stories and knew exactly what information we could reveal to Daein without risking Crimea and what things we couldn't repeat.

I walked to Petrine's tent, sweating slightly. I knocked on the tent flap to wait for her to admit me. I must admit, though, that the concept of knocking on tent flaps is still amusing to me. It's weird.

"Enter," I heard her voice bark out. Of course. I walked in and her mood did a complete change.

"You're a little early," Petrine commented.

"Better early than late. Punctuality is the key to success," I merely replied.

"Sit down at the table. We have so much to discuss to get to know each other better," Petrine said to me.

"You are most gracious, ma'am," I said, putting on the most flattering voice I could. Once again, I had to note to myself that my fate always seems twisted with her. Also, it seems like I've gotten twisted in with Shinon as well.

"So, you said you were part of the Crimean army?" Petrine asked.

"I am. I was even involved a bit with the Greil Mercenaries," I said.

"What are they like?" Petrine asked.

"Well, there's this one guy that stands out," I said.

"Who would that be?" she asked.

"Well, he's a mage. He flirts around with everyone. Apparently, he's an anima and dark mage. He tried hitting on me quite a few times," I said. Partly true. I'd hit on myself if I was a girl and I was standing next to myself.

What?

"... him," Petrine said.

"Do you know him?" I asked curiously.

"Brilliant mage who defected to the wrong side. He was a student of mine... or rather, a student of one of our brilliant soldiers who left with him. He had potential... I actually was looking forward to making him my right-hand soldier when he got better," Petrine said.

"Why were you going to do that?" I asked.

"Because he had talent and had that charisma of being an excellent leader. I could've used someone like that working with me. It would've been an honor to not only raise him as my soldier, but to make him somewhat of an equal," Petrine explained.

"What a lowlife, traitorous scum. Better he betrayed you now than when he was your right-hand soldier. But... you... really thought highly of him, didn't you?" I asked.

"... tell me a bit about how he is now," Petrine requested, avoiding my question.

"I thought you didn't want to think about him?" I asked.

"I'm masochistically fascinated with the fate of my prodigy," Petrine said. "Indulge me."

"Well, he's under the tutelage of some of the finest mages in the army. He's grown to be powerful, but I assumed you knew that already with the battle you two had," I said, trying to flatter her. I noticed I could measure her anger level through how she fidgeted with her fingers. Her lance, being absent, was not in her hand so she fidgeted with the air.

"I have," Petrine said with some annoyance.

"You seemed to completely outclass him at first," I said, trying to compliment her.

"He was dodging my attacks as if they were nothing. I could see the mocking sneer in his face, taunting me. His arrogance angered and blinded me, then he lectured me on my arrogance? It's quite hypocritical," she said.

"I see," I replied, deep in thought.

"What else about him?" she asked me.

"He seems to be on first-name terms with the princess herself. It's a privilege that none other in the army, that I know of, have so far," I said.

"That stupid washed up princess keeps thwarting me with her ragtag band of sellswords. At this rate, I'll be demoted..." Petrine growled. I hastily changed the subject.

"He also seems to be really close to a wyvern rider by the name of Jill. I think they may be involved with each other," I said. Yeah, right. I wish.

"Jill. Is she the wyvern rider who wears bright pink armor?" Petrine asked.

"Yes," I replied. I snorted internally as I realized that Jill's obnoxiously bright armor is how Petrine remembers her.

"Did she ever get shot by a ballista? That armor stands out like a Crimean weakling in the midst of skilled Daein soldiers," Petrine said.

"No, last I heard she was still alive," I replied.

"Hah, I knew it was going to happen," Petrine said.

"Excuse me?" I asked. What? Random topic change much?

"Those two have been giving each other looks since they were in my camp," Petrine said.

"Th-they have?" I stuttered out.

"... did you have an eye for him?" Petrine asked curiously.

"Hell no!" I exclaimed.

"..."

Petrine gave me such a piercing look that I feared that perhaps my disguise has been blown.

"I see. Continue," Petrine said.

"He really admired you," I said slowly.

"... hah! Really?" she asked.

"He does. He respects you as a soldier and is always thankful for what you did in saving his life and career as a soldier," I said.

"I... see," Petrine said.

"He also thought you were an attractive woman," I added. Well, that's a half-truth. I did think she was a woman. Everyone does. Despite the fact she doesn't act like one. I don't know about the other half, mind you.

"Dog's breath! He's making me look like a fool in front of all those Crimean soldiers. I am one of the four riders! I am one of the best in Daein. I am not some floundering, idiotic, makeup wearing idiot who can't tell a rune sword from a sonic sword! I am a proud, powerful warrior of Daein!" she proclaimed.

"As you are, ma'am. It would be an honor learning from one of the very best," I said.

"One of the best?" Petrine asked.

"I have heard a story from the Greil Mercenaries... rumors so to speak... of a knight encased in pure black armor. His skill and power with a sword is said to be unmatched," I said.

"Oh, the Black Knight. Some say he even fights at a level greater than the king himself, although neither of them have contested the other over it. A personal wish of mine is always to see those two in a sparring match to see who can overcome whom," Petrine said with a small smile.

"I can hardly imagine someone as great as you speaking so fondly and admirably about another soldier," I said with a hint of curiosity.

"Those two are in a league all to their own. Daein is a society built upon those with power. The strongest rule while the weak serve the strong. It is the natural order of the world. Even the animals of nature respect the strongest or the most cunning of their breed or pack," Petrine said.

"Why do you believe so much in power? What about the other things in life? I mean, Begnion's society is full of more than just power. It's full of culture and stupid traditions that annoyed the hell out of me when I was there," I said.

"That's exactly the problem. They're so wrapped up in tradition, it stifles power and stunts its growth. No two people are alike in this world inasmuch as my training to you would only benefit you slightly. You must find your own style and technique to work with. Who knows? I heard that you have some real potential with a bow. Perhaps you could rise through the ranks along with General Shinon. I have heard that it is quite possible that he might become the next four rider if General Bryce leaves," Petrine said.

"I never thought of it that way," I said with truthful honesty. "Is that why you believed so much in former Commander John?"

"... I saw an enormous amount of potential and talent. I am pleased to say that, as usual, I am a good judge of a young, potential warrior. My judging of character, though, was off with him," she said.

"Perhaps not as much as you may think," I replied.

"Tell me more about Crimea and their beliefs. As much as I detest them and hate them, one has to know their enemies to better understand how they work and how they'll move," Petrine said, once again trying to change the topic.

I closed my eyes, took a small breath, and began to tell Petrine everything that Jill and I agreed upon telling.

"I see," she replied after all that I told her. "This has actually been very useful for me."

"Thank you. I am glad to have been of some use," I said. I hope that this "some use" wouldn't end up screwing Crimea over. I am glad to have gained her trust... again, though.

"Tell me about your general. Tell me everything you know about him," Petrine asked.

"Well, he is a very good swordsman. His technique is one-of-a-kind that was given to him by his father, whom I heard you had battled with a while ago," I said.

"I did. He fights with a power I have never seen in my life. It is such a pity he could not be persuaded to join Daein," Petrine said.

"I know a bit more about him as well... something that many don't know," I said, unsure if revealing this much would really affect anything. She was about to die anyway.

"Such as?" Petrine asked.

"Such as the fact that he was formerly known throughout the world as General Gawain, rider of Daein," I said.

"... that is the fate of what has become of one of the greatest of the riders of Daein? He was a proficient master of the sword when he left, though," Petrine said.

"My sources said that he fled Daein for personal reasons that none are able to figure out. When he killed his wife with his sword in an accident, he ended up crippling himself so he could never wield a sword again and devoted himself to using an axe. His power may have been greatly diminished, but as you experienced, he was still a ferocious fighter," I said.

"General... Gawain. He was someone who I aspired to become. Imagine that even his weakened state, he was still more powerful than I am," Petrine trailed off.

There was silence between the both of us so I continued eating the food she had offered me.

"General, may I ask a question?" I asked Petrine.

"Go and ask," Petrine said.

"If you respect powerful warriors so much, why do you hate the sub-humans? They can be powerful creatures. I figured with their power, you would relish having them on your side," I asked her, using that deplorable, detestable term around her. Her face changed to one of mixed emotions and I could tell there was a few memories flashing through her head.

"They are filthy beasts," she finally said. I knew already at once that it was a lie. I knew by the look in her eye as she looked at me that she knew I knew it was a lie. However, I made no move to voice that opinion and kept to myself. In the same fashion, she made no note to say that she knew that I knew it was a lie.

"I see," I replied a bit weakly. There was a bit of silence between us, but I finally decided to voice a question that had been on my mine for a while.

"General, may I ask one other question?" I said. I knew I was treading on dangerous waters, asking almost as many questions as she did.

"Ask," she said in a slightly commanding tone.

"Why did you accept former Commander John into your army in the first place? There are plenty of potentially powerful warriors in and out of your army. Why did you choose him to be your prodigy?" I asked. I just had to ask her.

She looked at me for a few minutes, before staring at the tent flap. She was silent as she was deep in thought. I thought the question may have been too personal.

"When we caught him, his ally in his spying mission had abandoned him. He seemed like he didn't have an allegiance to any army. It can be a rough life in this world if there's no country or army to be behind you to support you, especially if you have such enormous potential as a soldier. I saw talent in him, but not just as a warrior. He was smart and cunning and I could see potential to be a leader. Perhaps he could've been a Four Rider; perhaps he could eventually even have became king of Daein. When he got older and became a powerful and famous Daein warrior, I wanted to look at him proudly and tell everyone I helped raise him," she said, before pausing. I didn't say anything. Is that why Shinon looked so proud when I said Rolf trained me? I never did see the bastard in that way.

"There's more to being a soldier than fighting. There's also using what you have to train those around you to bring to this world soldiers who may not be as good as you or soldiers who may surpass you. Pure talent and proper training are essential to a good fighter; no soldier can be complete without both. He could've been someone in Daein, no, in this world. Well, with the way he's going, he can still become great. I just hope he remembers his roots. Maybe to him, I'm the most evil and twisted soldier he met, but I am still proud that he's grown to where he is and acknowledges that I helped him get there," she continued before pausing again. There seemed to be something else on her mind, but she didn't continue talking.

You know, I never truly appreciated Petrine in that way. I always just saw her as a psycho bitch with temper problems and a secret to hide.

"General..." I began.

"Don't get the wrong idea. I'm not being overly emotional over a kid. I am merely expressing the thoughts that ran through my head as I saw him. I was honest with you. I expect complete trust and honesty in respect," she said forcefully to me. Ah, there's the Petrine I know.

"I shall do my best ma'am. I shall try my best to serve you to the best of my ability," I said to her.

"You're a lot like him in many ways," she said.

"... excuse me?" I said.

"You have potential. Not as a mage, but as an archer. You may even have potential with the sword, but I have yet to be the judge of that tomorrow," she said to me.

"I appreciate the compliment, especially from someone as high-ranked as you are in this army," I said to her. I didn't even have to fake the emotion. I really did appreciate what she said.

I kinda feel like a total ass for leaving the Daein army now. Still, I had to do what had to be done. Crimea was to win this war. I'm sorry, Petrine. It's a pity you can't join them like Selena did. I know you would have become a fine soldier in the Crimean army. It's a pity that you're going to die soon on the battle at the bridge.

The end of the day soon came. It felt different than how it was the last time I was in camp. The people treated me differently. I couldn't tell if it was because Daein was actually backpedaling in this war and losing or whether it was because I was a girl.

Maybe some kind of combination of both.

I was back in our tent. Everyone who joined together got a somewhat large tent and all roomed together. Made us easier to share information we gathered when we spied, but we still had to be careful all the same.

"So, how was your day in the Daein camp?" Guinevere asked me.

"It was good," I replied to her. We were the only two in the tent.

It all played out in my mind what I wanted to do now with Guin--... no, Jill. What she said, what Petrine said, what Elincia implied... there was something I had to do.

"Jill," I said in a now serious tone.

"... yes?" she asked me, looking at me curiously to figure out why I used her real name now.

"There is something I... I... have to ask you," I asked her.

"What is it?" she asked me. I looked at her, standing where I was as I tried to figure out what I was going to say.

"When we get back to camp... there is something I wanted to ask of you," I said quietly, making sure we weren't overheard.

"What is it?" she asked me, a curious look in her eye making it all the harder.

"Will... will..." I said, unable to say.

"You have a friend named William?" she asked me.

"No," I replied.

"Oh, Billy then?" she asked.

"No!" I replied.

"... what is it?" she asked.

"Will you... be... I mean, would you... agh, forget it," I said. "I'm going to sleep."

"... whatever you're going to ask, I'm going to say yes to," Jill said after a pause.

"You don't know what I'm going to ask," I said to her.

"Enlighten me," she replied with a playful smile. Ugh, what's with that smile! She couldn't have known.

"I was going to ask you to be my girlfriend but..." I burst out. I trailed off as I realize I had just cross the point of no return. The final threshold. The bridge is crossed... so stand and watch it burn.

"Like I said. Yes," she said to me, her smile changing completely to being a warm, captivating smile.

"I, uh..." I stuttered out. Wh-what? I kinda stood there, rooted to the spot, unable to think. I saw her walk over to me and hug me.

"I was wondering if you were ever going to ask me," she said slightly jokingly, her head on my shoulder.

"I never realized it until earlier today," I said.

"While having dinner with Petrine?" she asked me. Her head was on my shoulder, but I could sense the frown of confusion on her face.

"She mentioned it. She somehow knew it was going to happen. When she said that, it hit me about you," I said.

"... you can be so dense sometimes," she said with a small laugh. We broke off our hug and looked at each other, just as we did back in the Crimean camp. She closed her eyes, as did I and as before... I felt myself being pulled to her. I could feel her right in front of me.

"Ma'am, General Pet--"

We both quickly opened our eyes and jumped five feet into the air as we heard a rather tired voice speak out. There was a common Daein footsoldier standing at our doorway with the tent flap open. The look on his face was indescribable.

Wait a minute. That's Haar.

Oh god, of all the people to walk in on that scene. No, I wasn't doing anything with Jill!

... wait a minute. Our cover story. We're sisters. Oh fuck!

"I... I think I will leave you two alone for a second. I'll take a quick nap and be back later to deliver your message," Haar said.

"No, it's fine," we both said hastily.

"What did you wish to say?" I asked.

"General Petrine wanted to have a talk with Guinevere here tomorrow after her training," Haar said.

"Very well, commander. Thank you very much," she said in a small voice. Haar scrutinized Jill suspiciously as if he recognized her. I mean, granted, we simply dyed her hair and changed the color of her armor, but we also put her hair down from the ponytail, although she insisted on putting it up on occasion.

"By your leave," Haar said as he closed the flap. We paused for a second as we watched him walk away.

"I--"

"It's fine," she said as she held me close and cut me off. Without interruption, we were close as we were before.

There is just something that stirs within you when it happens for the first time with someone. Granted, we were both disguised as females...

... and as sisters...

... but even then, past all that, it was her and I. Nothing could separate that except ourselves.

... and separate ourselves we did. She smiled slightly at me as she took a step back.

"You have some of my lipstick... er..." I said sheepishly.

Jill smiled slightly at me as she wiped her lips of my lipstick. We both just smiled at each other.

... and it was at that moment I could not wait to return to the Crimean camp.

Author's Note: Yeah, yeah, go "d'awww" and all that. I kinda figured it was bound to happen now or later. Yeah... don't know what else to say. Only took, what, 49 chapters. Haha. The note in the first note still stand... I may be going on a hiatus due to events in life.