As White as Blood
Chapter Forty-Nine
A Boy Who Loves You
Thirty-Four Years Old
The duo had been partners for four years, and had been having sex for a total of two of said periods of time. Sasori and Deidara were both lying in the small single bed, with the blonde lying half on and half off of the red head. His head was positioned over Sasori's heart, with his left arm lazily draped over the red head's human chest. Deidara had already fallen asleep, but the thirty-four year old was not so lucky and he found him self deprived of the ability to fall unconscious.
With nothing better to do, Sasori had taken to staring up at the ceiling and slowly stroking the sleeping blonde's back, the skin still being moist with Deidara's sweat. It felt sort of nice beneath his fingertips…
Tonight the eighteen year old wasn't snoring, but he had taken to mumbling - which wasn't weird for the blonde. Sasori had been awake for over an hour now, and it was really beginning to irritate him.
Dammit; he hated waiting, so why couldn't his mind allow him to sleep already? To ease his boredom, he began paying more attention to what the blonde was saying. Mostly what he was muttering was just stupid nothings which didn't make any sense, with the odd statement which held some intelligence…Which was more than what he was usually capable of when he was conscious…
"Die…Stupid weasel…" Currently he appeared to be having a dream which involved Itachi, with the most likely scenario being a fight between the two. The blonde appeared to have this dream quite a lot, and it usually went the same way. He would always lose. "…Katsu…Sharingan?" Deidara twitched slightly and his left hand meekly closed into a weak fist. "I win…Huh…?" Sasori wondered faintly if he spoke in his sleep, either as a child or now when he slept in human form…When Deidara woke up, he would always be oblivious to the fact that he spoke in his sleep. "…Danna…" This was also a common occurrence. Through his dreams, Deidara exhibited an almost fear of Sasori leaving him. "Danna…Don't go…I'll kill Itachi, just…Don't go…un…" The red head had half a mind to wake the blonde up just to stop him from going on with the stupid dream.
Sasori was still for a few seconds, when he thought of a new idea which might help to shut the blonde up rather than just waking him. The red head stilled the motions of his fingers and brought his other hand up to comfort the blonde, moving his mouth to Deidara's ear.
"Shhh…" Okay, so Sasori wasn't really the type to actually comfort someone -especially the blonde - but sleep deprivation was enough to make him at least try. "It's alright, I'm here; I'm not going anywhere." He spoke in a hushed, almost tender, tone, trying not to wake the kid, but to ease him of his insecurities. It appeared to actually work. Deidara gave a small sigh of what sounded like relief, and he physically relaxed.
Sasori was also relieved, now knowing that he finally could get some sleep. He closed his eyes and felt Deidara slightly move, nuzzling his face against the red head's skin while still remaining unconscious, giving a small sigh.
And that was when he uttered the most disgusting thing that Sasori had ever heard in his entire life; several simple words which immediately made the red head feel sick to his small human stomach.
"I love you, Danna."
It was but a whisper, but it sounded like a snarl in the red head's ears.
Sasori's eyes snapped open in astonishment and he immediately shot a look at the blonde, the latter still being fast asleep. The red head's face paled significantly - which was possible since he was still in his human form - and he was absolutely horrified by Deidara's unconscious words.
He automatically overreacted.
Sasori immediately shoved and kicked the sleeping blonde away from him, only stopping once Deidara hit the floor. "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU?" The red head stared down at the now half-awake blonde, who was currently groaning, confused as to how he had made his way onto the floor. Sasori was uncharacteristically panicking, going through emotions faster than a bolt of lightening. Horror, anger, rage, revulsion, fury, ire, absolute disgust!
Deidara gave a groan and sat up, rubbing his now sore head in his confusion. He blinked sleepily up at the red head with an irritated look. "Huh…?" The blonde was utterly oblivious to his own wrong doing.
Sasori sneered down at the blonde, flustered, and he stood up on the opposite side of the bed to Deidara. "YOU ARE FUCKING DISGUSTING!" He quickly pulled his pants, shoes and Akatsuki cloak back on from where they had carelessly been tossed an hour or so ago. Sasori undid his Human Jutsu, reverting back into his puppet form, grabbing a scroll from inside of Hiruko.
The red head heard the blonde get to his feet as Sasori sealed his marionette inside of the scroll, slipping it into a seal within his left sleeve. He shot Deidara a daggered glare. The immodest blonde stood with the bed sheets - which had slipped off of the bed with him - pooled at his feet, body completely bare.
Sasori found he didn't even want to look at his living puppet, still feeling completely sickened by his words. He was still tired from being woken up, and also confused by the red head's actions. "What are you mad about now, un?"
Sasori simply sneered at him and flicked his head to look away from the blonde, storming to the doorway. "DON'T YOU DARE FUCKING FOLLOW!" The red head practically ripped open the door and slammed it shut behind him, leaving the dim-witted kid to mope in his ignorance of the revulsion that Sasori had just experienced.
If there was one thing that the red head knew it was that he was not going to get any sleep tonight.
-x-
Sasori didn't return until the late hours of the following morning, sauntering in not entirely serene, but having built up his composure and calm enough to deal with the blonde.
Of course, when he opened the door to the inn, he was not at all surprised to find said Akatsuki member sitting up on the unmade bed, clothed and currently moulding his explosive clay meticulously into little deformed shapes. His head snapped up at the sound of the door opening, and he blinked at the red head with slight confusion.
He had been perfectly aware that Sasori would return, as Deidara still did not know the crime of which he was guilty of. "Are you PMSing or something? I thought I was supposed to be the girl, un." He said it with an ironic monotone, the question being rhetorical and the statement was not meant to be serious nor true.
Sasori's eye twitched slightly - still disliking the thought of actually looking at the sickening blonde - as he shut the door behind him. "We need to talk, Brat." The blonde raised an eyebrow at him and shoved the clay back into one of the two pouches which sat on his hips.
Deidara did not talk, waiting for the red head to shed light upon his taboo with a learnt patience.
Sasori was silent for a few seconds of thought, before he slowly made his way over to the bed, taking a seat on the end, leaving a metre of space between them both. "I'm willing to give you…The benefit of the doubt…If you just answer one question truthfully." Deidara simply blinked at him, and waited for Sasori to continue. "…You said something quite…" Disturbing, disgusting, despicable… "'Unusual' in your sleep…And it got me felling quite…" Affronted, appalled, awkward… "Upset…So, please tell me that what you said wasn't true…"
"Ummm…Okay…? What I said wasn't true…?" Deidara blinked in confusion, still not knowing what it was he was in trouble for.
Sasori gave him a vapid look, his eye twitching slightly in annoyance. "…You don't even know, do you?"
"Not a clue, un." The blonde gave a shrug and the red head gave a half awkward sigh.
"Okay…" He had to be careful about what he asked… "I guess what I'm trying to question you about is…Well…" Sasori didn't really want to say; he was actually anxious as to what the blonde's answer would be. Hopefully Deidara would instantly deny the accusation that he was harbouring feelings for the red head, and then they could both move on with their lives…But he knew that anything with the blonde involved was not so simple… "Do you…'Love' me?"
Deidara blinked at him, the air between them suddenly going both quiet and awkward. A few seconds of this tension went by, until the blonde abruptly burst out laughing. He cackled so hard that he moved onto his back, rolling on the bed sheets and clenching at his sides to stop them from ripping him in half. Sasori was overcome with relief, and he gave a sigh, almost smiling. Good; it had just been a stupid misunderstanding. Deidara soon stopped laughing and sat up, his usual grin in place. "Of course I love you, Danna."
…
Sasori could swear that he felt his puppet body go slightly colder, and his imaginary stomach seemed to grow in desire to clench and make the red head vomit the masses of nothing that lurked in the make-believe organ. "What?"
Deidara's grin fell and he gave a shrug, "Well, our relationship sure as shit ain't platonic, un." He gave a hum and leaned back slightly and Sasori - for the first time - noticed that the blonde's cloak wasn't actually buttoned up…Why the fuck did he notice that? "But it's not like I'm in love with you."
Sasori gave the blonde a disgusted sneer, shaking his head at the kid. "That doesn't make any sense, Brat! I already told you that our relationship was not to progress beyond team mates! It was one of the rules I originally gave you four years ago! And I set it again when we first made The Deal!"
"Oh please Danna, that rule has been broken ever since you first decided to fuck me." Deidara smirked at him for a few seconds, before the expression dropped into a half serious look. "But don't worry, I'm not a girl. I don't expect you to love me."
"I don't 'Love' you," Sasori glared at the blonde and looked away from him with a snap, "and I never will!" Mostly because Sasori had no idea what love was or what it felt like. The red head was quiet for a few seconds, before he turned back to him. "If you continue, I'll…I'll…"
Deidara raised an eyebrow at him, and gave a sardonic smirk. "You'll what? Break my heart? Please Danna; you can't break what I didn't have to start with, un." He gave a slight chuckle and a cat-like stretch.
"Well, I-" Sasori noticed that not only did the blonde have his cloak unbuttoned, but he also did not wear his fishnet shirt. The red head couldn't help but have a mental blank as his attention was distracted by Deidara's lithe body.
The body that had been given to Sasori.
The red head was brought back to reality by the blonde giving a chuckle. "Danna, you're distracted. Perhaps we should skip this whole stupid talk and have some more fun, un~"
Sasori blinked and shot Deidara a sharp, disgusted glare. "Forget it, Brat; The Deal is off. I'm not sleeping with you anymore."
Deidara's smirk didn't fall, if anything it grew and became far more seductive. "Oh really?" He gave a short chuckle and crawled forward to the red head, having the nerve to move a hand up to Sasori's cheek. "We had sex just last night, and you are already craving my body, un."
The red head had long since lost the instinct to stab, attack and/or murder the blonde due to being touched by him, so Sasori simply managed a glare. "Don't you dare try to change the topic…"
It was true. Sure his body was that of a puppet so he couldn't get excited - so to speak - but he could still feel the emotion of lust bubbling up in his mind as memories of pleasuring the blonde entered his head. Deidara's body - the body that Sasori owned - erratic with pleasure and an unmitigated desire for more.
Deidara - having been able to get away with the small touch - decided to take his actions even further. He boldly crawled close to the red head and adjusted himself to sit in Sasori's lap, wrapping his legs around the puppet's waist. "Come on, Danna; we can continue this stupid conversation later, but first…" The blonde moved his Akatsuki cloak slightly to reveal more of his skin and Sasori felt himself unable to resist the flesh.
He made several hand signs and felt his body shift back into human form. He immediately moved his hands to Deidara's shoulders, sliding the Akatsuki cloak off of the blonde as he began to attack the irresistible eighteen year old's neck with his mouth.
-x-
Deidara was lying - quite smugly - on the red head's chest, drawing small shapes using his finger on Sasori's skin. There was a conceited smirk on his lips as he most likely thought about the idea of having the red head wrapped around his little finger.
Sasori, on the other hand, was feeling quite miserable.
He was disgusted and annoyed with himself for falling for the blonde's seduction. It was so fucking stupid. "I guess this means that The Deal is still on, un~" Sasori sneered and pushed the blonde off of him, rolling over so that his back faced Deidara. "Don't get mad, Danna, there isn't any reason to get upset."
"SHUT UP!" Sasori just wanted to beat the fucking blonde to a bloody pulp to try and drill some commonsense into him. "I FUCKING HATE YOU!" The red head pulled the bed sheets over his head.
Deidara gave a sigh and sat up, collapsing back down on the bed after he gave a hiss of pain. "Man, you did a number on my ass." Sasori simply ignored the stupid blonde, still moping in frustration. Deidara was silent for a few seconds, before giving a bored sigh. "Look Danna, there is no reason to feel sorry for yourself. This doesn't make anything different between us just because you know."
Sasori rolled over in the bed harshly, propping himself up on an elbow to glare dangerously at the infuriating blonde. "THIS CHANGES EVERYTHING! JUST SEX WAS BARELY ACCEPTABLE! I DON'T WANT TO SLEEP WITH YOU NOW THAT I KNOW YOU FUCKING LOVE ME!"
Deidara looked into Sasori's harsh brown eyes, and Sasori stared back into Deidara's forget-me-not orbs, his blonde hair hanging so that it did not obscure the view.
"Listen to me for a minute, will you, un?" The red head scrunched his nose in irritation, but allowed Deidara to explain himself, hoping that the blonde's reasons were at least rational. "Thank you, now…Yes, I love you, but it is more complicated than that. I love certain aspects of you, un…I mean, I certainly am not in love with your charming personality." Sasori's eyes narrowed at the sarcasm, and Deidara continued. "The thing is, I don't know why I love you and I can't even tell if it is you I love or the sex, un."
"If it were just sex, then it wouldn't be so disgusting." Sasori's look softened and he gave a short sigh. "I still don't understand what that stupid emotion is; all I know is that if you feel it towards me, it is bad. Now hate; at least that emotion I can understand. I hate you."
"I agree with that." Deidara grinned widely at the red head and he moved an inch closer. "Because I also hate you…" The blonde frowned in a thoughtful look, and then gave a shrug. "And I love you too…So it might not be the same case for me after all…"
Sasori gave the blonde a short half-hearted glare, before he gave a hopeless sigh. "You know what? Fine, I just don't care. You can 'love' me if you want, but don't expect me to gain any feeling for you aside from hatred."
Deidara smirked at him widely, and gave a short laugh. "Don't worry Darling, I don't expect you to. Besides, if you loved me then that would be awkward, un."
"How do you think I feel?" Sasori gave a sigh as his anger ebbed away, leaving him feeling empty. "And don't you dare call me 'Darling', or else The Deal is off permanently."
Well, Darling was better than calling them lovers…
"Fine." Deidara shrugged and Sasori stood from the bed, beginning to hunt down his clothes. The blonde sat up, giving a slight groan of pain. "Fuck, do we really have to go? My ass still hurts from your angry sex."
"Quit complaining; it was your fault that I needed to vent. It's still the morning and we are not spending any more time in private. I've had enough alone time with you that I can handle for an extended period of time. Now get dressed and let's go."
Deidara gave a sigh and got up off of the bed, stretching his arms sightly as he began to search for his clothes.
-o-
…Yeah…I don't feel that I overreacted to the kid's confession…
Okay, maybe a tiny bit, but who wouldn't overreact to your underling - who you have been having sex with for two years - has fallen in love with you. It was quite a disturbing experience, but mostly because it made me realise that the blonde had officially broken all of my original rules.
I then had to understand the fact that Deidara and I were no longer just team mates in the organization known as the Akatsuki…
We were lovers…Even though, later on, when he once called us 'lovers', I completely overreacted and I…I…
You must realise that I was appalled by the idea that Deidara actually had feelings for me…Well, aside from our mutual hatred of one another…And also that the blonde gained a certain control over my body by using his own as bait.
Fucking Brat…But then again it was true what he had said…Our relationship was anything but platonic…In fact, I should have been expecting the blonde to gain some sort of affection…Well, then again he never did try to force me to fall in love with him…Even though…Eventually…
Nothing…It's nothing… I already regret telling you…Just…Just forget that this whole scenario even occurred…
The only thing worse than a boy who hates you is a boy who loves you.
