Disclaimer: I do not own The Lord of the Rings, The Hobbit, or any associated characters or concepts. Consider it disclaimed. Quotes in this chapter come directly from the Fellowship of the Ring by JRR Tolkien.
If you last read this fic before Thanksgiving 2018, you should start back at the beginning, because several chapters have been updated and heavily edited.
On the way to the Undying Lands, Billa Baggins is eaten by a time-traveling sea monster. She wakes up in her 33-year-old body and realizes she has a chance to change everything. Unfortunately, Thorin has a tendency to run around shirtless and Dis thinks she has improper designs on Fili and Kili, but if she can convince the Shire that Dwalin is a dance teacher, things might be okay.
Chapter 52
Billa was hiding in her drawing room, trying to have a moment of peace and clarity. It wasn't working very well.
She had created numerous projects for herself over the winter to fill her time. However, now that Thorin was back, Billa was feeling the urge to cast them all to the wind and focus all her attention on Thorin. She was giddy, lighthearted, and blissful, and it was really quite difficult to focus on getting any work done when she knew Thorin was here in the Shire and she could be cuddled up in his arms instead.
For propriety's sake, Thorin was now staying at the Old Smials instead of in her home. Billa wasn't sure if this made him more or less distracting. But, it had only been a few days and she was feeling a bit overwhelmed.
In addition to her recent engagement to Thorin (which she still needed to properly inform people about - honestly, it was only polite), she was also arranging to host an Elf from Rivendell (she still hadn't had that discussion with Thorin, and she did not look forward to it), as well as start back up her weapons lessons with Dwalin, oversee her tenants, manage the rumor-mill, open up correspondence with Mirkwood, and half a dozen other things she couldn't quite remember at the moment.
She sighed. Thorin, who had poked his head into the drawing room at just that moment, gazed softly at her.
"What's on your mind, azyungal?" he asked.
Billa didn't want to burden him with her mood. "It's nothing," she said.
Thorin raised an eyebrow, showing her a grim face she hadn't seen for several months. "Billa..." he prompted her.
Billa gave in. She actually wanted his advice, but had been feeling too silly and sulky to ask.
"Fine," she said. "I'm feeling overwhelmed. How do you get it all done?"
"All what?" he asked, coming over to sit at her feet. He rested his head on her knee, a clear invitation (or shameless plea, depending on how you look at it) for her to pet his hair. That had been a recent development that quite surprised her. Thorin Oakenshield was apparently a huge fan of getting his hair brushed, braided, or even just petted, and when they were relaxing in private (like now), he was quite shameless and relentless in his pursuit.
"King stuff," she said vaguely, enjoying the feel of his dark silky tresses sliding through her fingers. "Ruling Erebo - I mean, Ered Luin, and still having time for your training, your family, and you know, sleep."
"Balin." Thorin said succinctly, deliberately ignoring her slip of the tongue. His head lolling against her knee to give her a different side of his head to pet.
Balin had actually been passing from the kitchen to the back door to give them a little privacy, but once he heard his name, he paused to listen.
Billa glanced up. She couldn't see Balin, so what was Thorin talking about? "Where?" she asked.
Thorin laughed. "Not where. How."
Billa squinted at him, confused.
Thorin explained, "Balin is how I get all of that done. Well, Balin, Dwalin, Dis, and Frerin. But the bulk of it falls on Balin."
Billa had seen Balin taking on an advisory role, but she'd never suspected it was so extensive.
"Are you saying he's some kind of power behind the throne?" she said dryly.
"Well," Thorin made a fifty-fifty gesture with his hand, as if to say, 'sort of.' "It's like this. When someone needs to contact me, Balin sorts it out. He knows what I want to handle personally, and what I just need to be informed of. He knows my long-term goals, and shares them. He's incredibly loyal, and wise, with far more experience than I do. He offers his advice, and after I've made my decision, he works to make sure the details are handled. If you're feeling overwhelmed and handling too many projects..." he trailed off.
Billa took up the thread. "Then I need a Balin."
"Exactly," Thorin nodded.
Experimentally, Billa stopped petting Thorin's head. He accepted this for a moment, before his head nuzzled at her leg like an impolite, over-eager puppy. Billa stifled her snicker and obliged him, this time starting to weave random braids in his hair.
"So, I need a Balin," she said. "But I can't have your Balin."
Balin, where he was waiting on the other side of the wall, winced, suddenly a little worried. His opinion of the Hobbit was much improved, but he was too old to be making drastic employment changes!
Thorin shook his head firmly. "My Balin," he declared. Balin breathed a sigh of relief, and moved on. He noticed Nori loitering also, and began to shoo him away.
"You don't even live here!" he whisper shouted at Nori as he herded him out of the house. "Why are you always here?"
"Eavesdropping is not a crime!" Nori whisper-shouted back, retreating with ill grace.
"It's highly inappropriate!" Balin hissed.
"Then what were you doing?" Nori pointed out.
Balin paused, struck with the hypocrisy of his actions, and Nori made his escape out the back door. After a moment, Balin followed at a much slower pace.
Meanwhile, back in the drawing room, Billa and Thorin continued none the wiser.
"How did you get your Balin?" Billa asked.
Thorin smirked. "He came with the job," he said teasingly, and Billa thought that was probably true.
"Well, I'm going nuts trying to balance all my projects, so I'll have to put some feelers out. I need a Balin right away," she sighed.
Thorin was feeling helpful.
"Well if you've got a nail, I've got a hammer," he said.
Billa tilted her head. "I don't have any nails?" she asked, confused.
Thorin looked confusedly back at her, and then his eyes cleared.
"It's an expression," he explained. "It means if you've got a problem or a task, I'm willing and able to assist."
"Oh, I see," Billa said thoughtfully. Then she considered his offer, and part of her cringed. She really did need to tell him about the upcoming envoy from the elves, however little she wanted to.
"Well..." she said faintly, wondering what the best way to carry this conversation without ending in a shouting match would be.
"Yes?" Thorin said, becoming more intrigued by her reticence.
Billa mustered her courage, and her wiles. "In my old life, after the disastrous end to the Quest for Erebor, I came back to the Shire. But I had seen too much, I was too much changed. I couldn't just go back to my old life. The Shire felt small, and stifling."
Thorin could see why she would think that. If he wasn't so enamored of having a full belly and a warm bed, he might have thought the same. It was awfully quiet here.
"Balin came to visit me once, before he left to reclaim Moria - " Thorin started, shocked, and Billa realized where his mind had gone. "Oh yes, Balin led the party, and Oin and Ori joined him on his quest to reclaim Moria. They were successful for 5 years, and re-took much of the eastern territory - they even reclaimed Durin's Axe! But they were greatly outnumbered, and were eventually slain. My nephew Frodo had cause to visit Moria, and read of their deaths in Ori's record. Goblins and the Balrog filled the depths, and Frodo and his Fellowship had to fight their way out," she explained.
"I - I had not considered how helpful it might be to have your foreknowledge and experience when considering the future," Thorin said, looking a bit grim at this news.
"I have been. Rather exhaustively. And that's what I wanted to talk with you about. The first time around, I was so lonely in the Shire, and began to develop even more unconventional friendships. Some of those friendships included elves," Billa said.
Thorin shifted uncomfortably, and Billa switched gears.
"One of the other things I did was delve into history - Hobbit, Elf, and Dwarf history. I was shocked to discover that Elves and Dwarves had worked together in Moria over 3,000 years ago, and the Elven part of the alliance was led by Galadriel, Lady of Light. My own nephew, Frodo, and Gimli son of Gloin met that same Galadriel in Lothlorien, when they were journeying on a Quest with 7 other companions. She is a being of incredible beauty, power, and knowledge, and I met her myself when I took the journey to sail west to the Undying Lands. There's a story of her, that I think you will find interesting. Feanor, who created the Silmarils during the first age, was her first cousin, and he begged Galadriel three times for a tress of her silver-golden hair to bring color to the Silmarils. She refused him.
"Gimli, when he met her in Lothlorien, raw with grief having just discovered the death of his Uncle Oin, spoke with her. At the end of the Fellowship's stay there, each member of the Fellowship was given a gift. Galadriel asked Gimli what he desired, and Gimli said he wanted for nothing. Galadriel said, "Hear all ye Elves! Let none say again that Dwarves are grasping and ungracious! Yet surely, Gimli son of Gloin, you desire something that I could give. Name it, I bid you! You shall not be the only guest without a gift.""
Thorin, leaning his head back to gaze up at her, suspicion mixing with curiosity. Billa continued.
"Gimli said, "There is nothing, Lady Galadriel. Nothing, unless it might be - unless it is permitted to ask, nay, to name a single strand of your hair, which surpasses the gold of the earth as the stars surpass the gems of the mine. I do not ask for such a gift. But you commanded me to name my desire." The Elves were shocked and amazed, and Lady Galadriel laughed with delight and said, "It is said that the skill of the Dwarves is in their hands rather than in their tongues, yet that is not true of Gimli. For none have ever made to me a request so bold and yet so courteous. And how shall I refuse, since I commanded him to speak? But tell me, what would you do with such a gift?"
"As you remember," Billa told Thorin, "Feanor had begged to use the hair and it's color to create the Silmarils, and if she had given it to him, he may have drawn upon her power. Dwarves also know the power and standing that comes with one's hair - as your own beard demonstrates," she explained. Thorin nodded slowly.
"Gimli answered, "Treasure it, Lady, in memory of your words to me at our first meeting. And if ever I return to the smithies of my home, it shall be set in imperishable crystal to be an heirloom of my house, and a pledge of good will between the Mountain and the Wood until the end of days."
"Galadriel had judged Feanor, an elf of high ranking and great power, unworthy of his request. Yet despite years of hostility and misunderstanding between their two races, Galadriel unbraided one of her long tresses and cut off three golden strands, and laid them in Gimli's palm. These last words she said to him: "Gimli son of Gloin, your hands shall flow with gold, and yet over you gold shall have no dominion.""
Thorin looked very thoughtful, and Billa paused for a moment to let that last line sink in. Then she continued her story.
"You will not think well of Thranduil-King, and I have reasons to think ill of him also," Billa said, and she could see Thorin's face going sour. "On that we have little disagreement. And yet his son, Legolas, was a companion to my nephew Frodo and Gimli. Legolas and Gimli formed a great friendship and explored many wonders of Middle Earth together. When I passed into the Western lands, they were yet travelling together, though their quest had ended."
Billa took a deep breath. "When I woke up in this time, I rushed to find you, and begin our friendship again. I am also eager to renew my friendships with the elves I knew, and have taken steps to do so."
Thorin's eyebrows started to wrinkle, but Billa couldn't tell if it was thought, concern, or anger. She would not budge on this issue, but she didn't want to fight about it.
"Balin, Ori, and Nori have had many discussions with me about the elves, and Lithir needs a chance to learn more of her people. We have been writing letters back and forth to Lord Elrond of Rivendell, who was once a very dear friend of mine, and he will be sending a tutor for Lithir in a few weeks," Billa said. "I'm not asking you to like it, and I'm not asking you to become bosom friends with whomever he sends, but I will insist on courtesy. You can do your own research and form your own opinion, but I take being a host very seriously," she warned.
Thorin looked... displeased. Billa hadn't seen that face in a few months either. She bent over to kiss his forehead, and then patted him on the shoulder.
"I'm going to go ask Balin about finding my own Balin," she informed him, "And I leave you to consider my words and come to your own conclusions."
Thorin shifted so she could stand up, and she kissed him again before she rose and walked out.
Still sitting on the ground, Thorin glared at the wall.
"First dancing," he muttered unhappily, "and now elves. What's next - dragons?"
