there be only sea as far as ye can see
between fable II & III
Sparrow, Reaver


"Reaver, I'm bored. Entertain me!"

The pirate sighed. "What exactly do you expect me to do about it hm? I've already offered more than enough suggestions-"

"There's no more ale left, cards are boring when no one can beat you, I'm not allowed in the galley anymore, and I've told you ten bajillion times I'm not part of your crew so to hell with you and your deck swabbing."

Reaver chuckled. "I think you may have misunderstood that last one-"

Sparrow waved him off, jumping up to balance precariously on the rail. "How bleedin' long till we get there? You know I hate boats."

"The ship, my dear gypsy, is due to arrive by dawn." Reaver leant against the rail Sparrow was currently walking back and forth upon.

"Tisn't even night yet! I'll go crazy a 'fore then!"

"Oh I highly doubt it. One can only achieve certain states of being once in their lifetime."

Sparrow paused in his pacing. "What? Reaver-"

"As it were-"A larger wave rolled beneath the vessel, Reaver snatching hold of the gypsy's belt before the ship managed to buck him off into the ocean. "Having attained such lofty achievements does not give one cause to act foolishly, and willfully endangering one's life on a whim is at the height of said foolishness."

Sparrow, having regained his balance, stared quizzically down at his fellow hero, who's rather placid expression gave him no hints as to whether or not he should be taking offense. "If you're going to yell at me, or whatever it is you just did, do it in English, yea?"

"Ah, yes, I keep forgetting who it was that raised and nurtured that simple little mind of yours-"

"Steve?"

"Beg pardon?"

"Steve, the guy who 'raised and nurtured my simple little mind'. He was the one who fed me the Bowerstone Old Quarter delicacy when Theresa demanded I eat moldy Skorm bogies."

"So the blind old bat wasn't as small minded as I assumed, having judged her on how you turned out. What was it this Steve person did?"

"He was a clothing vendor."

"Why is it I get the feeling your 'Bowerstone Old Quarter Delicacy' involves shoes?"

"Cause it does? Ladies shoes to be exact."

"Hmm, perhaps I shouldn't have bothered reconsidering your charming guardian after all."

"Probably not. So, Mr. I like to change the subject, I believe you were about to give me an understandable translation of whatever it was you spouted off at me?"

Reaver smirked. "Ah yes! I believe it would be something along the lines of: 'You're an idiot, now get down before you fall down. I'm not sure I trust you to have the ability to swim-"

"Hey, I lived on a lake!"

"Nor will your seeming dreams of joining the circus ever come true. Now kindly stop parading about on the rail like a child, would you?"

The hero huffed. "Yes mum." Then dropped his ass to the rail, crossed his legs, and propped his chin on his fist. "Better?"

"You know Sparrow, you are the only person ever to step foot on this ship who hasn't lost their mind for forgetting that I am captain, and whatever it is I should happen to say is law."

"How would that drive them craz-oh." Sparrow cut himself off at Reaver's pointed 'back-of-your-head-vacating-your-skull' hand gesture. "Right. That makes more sense."

"Indeed."

"Soooo…"

The pirate quirked a brow.

"Entertain me?"

"I believe we just-"

"Oh! Can we fish for sharks? And then wrestle them?"

"No."

"But I've always wanted a pet shark-"

"No."

"But I'll feed-"

"No."

"And walk-"

"No."

Sparrow took a deep breath. "ButI'llletyounamehimandpethimand-
wecanteachhimtoeatthebodies-
-ofpeopleyoushootintheface-
foreasycleanupsoitllbe-
asynchtofeedhimand-"

"And yet again, despite understanding a third of that at most, I'm going to have to say no."

"But why?"

"Where would you keep it?"

"The tub."

"Have you ever actually seen a shark, love?"

"….No. Will it not fit in the tub?"

"Not even if you were to quarter it for stew."

"Hm, ok. New plan-!"

"Sparrow?"

"Yes?"

"Why don't you climb up to the Crow's Nest and watch for land?" Reaver pointed up at the enclosed platform nestled above the rigging.

Sparrow shrugged. "Ok."

Reaver watched the hero leap from the railing, vault from the upper deck straight into the rigging on the main mast, and then scramble his way easily upwards.

"Apparently this shoe vendor of his just happened to be a monkey to boot." He snorted at his own rather poor but still amusing pun. "Oh dear, I do believe our young guest may need to be tranquilized for the return journey, lest he drive me to madness…."


a/n: since when does FF dot net have such an issue with using giant run on sentances that don't bother with spaces? good god, that took me ages to cut up so it would work properly