"Hawke," Serah squeezed her hand as they walked through the grasses near the edge the edge of the cliff. "I really appreciate you pulling all those strings to get me to the dig site today."

"You seemed to have a good time while at it," Hawke smiled, "You think that's something you'd want to keep doing?"

"It is so much," Serah craved with all her heart, "The site, and all the relics— and I can't believe your library! You had pieces dated back to the Enslavement; it was incredible, I've never seen anything so big and exciting in my life before."

"That's 'cuz you haven't seen me yet."

The joke took a few seconds to register to Serah, who's cheeks rosied. "Oh," She slapped at Hawke's shoulder with her free hand. "Hawke!"

"Just kidding, just kidding," Hawke joked, good naturedly, then gave Serah a private smile. "But seriously. That's why."

Serah giggled and bit her lower lip. "You're terrible."

"I know," Hawke gave her a smile, gently rocking that held hand. "You like it here, Serah, don't you?"

"I love it," Serah claimed, gazing up and around the grasses and the open sky, striding next to Hawke and a giant cliff with nothing around them but nature turning in for the night. "It's so peaceful here, and your people are fascinating. I love the tribal lifestyle in comparison to Cocoon; the way you guys live is so restful. Everyone wants to help each other and they're so happy, doing exactly what they want like it's so easy."

"It is easy," Hawke stressed.

"Maybe here it is," Serah admitted, "It's like you guys live in Utopia. It's perfect here."

"I'm glad to hear you say that," Hawke gave her another grin, suddenly coming to a stop and tugged Serah's hand so she would stop too. "I wanted to tell you something, Serah."

Butterflies fluttered in her belly, as they usually did with Hawke around, but when Serah looked into Hawke's face, they went especially crazy. She wore that look with the light in her eyes, coy little smirk starting at the edges. "What is it?" Serah asked anxiously. "You look like you did something."

"Well," Hawke licked her bottom lip, "That's probably because I did."

"What is it?" Serah glanced around them suddenly, wondering if something would jump out at her. When nothing came that immediately threatened them, she turned back to Hawke. "What'd you do, Hawke?"

"I thought you might really like the dig site and the archives," Hawke started, "So, I pulled some pre-emptive strings, asked around, made a couple of trades… and I might've gotten you a place with the diggers."

Serah's eyes bulged. "What?"

"When you want it!" Hawke added quickly, "If you want it, I mean. I had to set some things up with the Ryz tribe mostly 'cuz they're the big diggers and holders of our history, but I managed to secure you a place with one of the groups and studying bands at the Archives under only a couple of conditions. The first is if you moved to Gran Pulse, of course, and make a commitment to join a tribe. It's not anything you'd have to do immediately or anything, they Ryz are willing to give you whatever time it might take you to move here and decide, but after meeting with you today and talking some more, they said they'd be willing to hold open a spot for you if you wanted, even if took a few years for you to move to Gran Pulse.

But the way I thought of it in my head," Hawke went on, "Was that you and Light might move here, right? And you wouldn't have to wait to finish your schooling because you've already got an offer for the job. We can show you everything you'll need to learn here, and you wouldn't have to finish out the years or waste any more money there."

"Hawke…" Serah felt so overwhelmed, she was speechless. She just didn't know what to say.

"I'm getting ahead of myself though," Hawke tried to slow down, "I'm sorry if that was a lot to take in. I just got so excited, I wanted to share that news. I know you and Lightning might not move her for months or years, I just… I wanted you to know that there's a way for you, if you want it." Hawke rubbed her arm. "And I know you'll have to talk to Lightning and all about it… it's not exactly what I wanted to tell you anyway."

"It's not?" Serah asked, feeling dazed. They could live in Gran Pulse, Hawke was saying. Immediately, without six more years of school and training. Lightning could stop waitressing. She could live in Gran Pulse with Serah and Fang. Immediately, if they wanted… oh man. Or lack of them, rather! Serah felt so overwhelmed.

"No," Hawke's hand on her arm dropped down to her other, until she squeezed both hands in her own. "There's something else."

"What?" Serah asked dizzily, heart fluttering in her chest.

Then Hawke dropped to a knee. Serah almost passed out on the spot.

"Cocoon Serah Farron," Hawke started, racing her heart.

"What're you doing?" Serah asked, blinking rapidly to keep her eyes open.

"It would be my greatest honor, making me the happiest Yun in all Gran Pulse…"

"Hawke?" Serah's vision darkening, her eyes fluttered.

"If you would consent to mate me." Hawke proposed, then looked up at her with a smile. "Please."

Then the darkness covered her eyes and Serah saw her no more.

XXX

Small chunks of white meat like little eggs her ovaries would never produce swam untroubled through the gravy that dousing them through wholly, soaking them to be rich and full, full of flavor and purpose that Sky's beautiful seed would never have in her broken body, unable to correctly respond to her lover's virility for a failure Vanille would never make up for in mothering. Because she wouldn't have kids to mother at all when all her friends had gone and started families.

"Vanille," Vanille didn't notice Sky had stopped in chopping the lettuce until she was already behind her, pressing up to Vanille's back, brushing away another tear from her cheek.

"I'm sorry," Vanille tried to breathe evenly, looking down. "I can't stop thinking about it."

"It's okay, Vanille," Sky said again, probably around the thousandth time the words had come since initial discovery. "I love you."

"I want you to have a family." Vanille whimpered, "I don't want you to be stuck with me."

"I've told you," Sky chastised softly in reprimand, "I'm with you because I want to be. I'm not stuck with you, Vanille."

Vanille closed her eyes, leaning back against her Yun. "Then why does it feel like I should break up with you to make you happy?"

"That wouldn't make me happy," Sky insisted quietly.

"Not now," Vanille agreed, "But in the long run…"

The front door burst open with a slam, drawing three heads to find Hawke with a limp Serah in her arms. "I need some help!" Hawke called out, charging into the kitchen.

"What'd you do?" Sky swore, parting from the stove with Vanille as Hawke laid her on the kitchen table, ignoring a few plates.

"I just asked her to date me!" Hawke squeaked, "I didn't know she'd pass out from it!" Hawke brushed the hair out of her face. "…I think she passed out from it. Is Jaeger here?"

"She's not," Summer interrupted, patting Hawke aside a little. "Let me see."

"Summer!" Vanille flushed in equal surprise and humiliation. The woman had been politely silent for her and Sky's little squabble, but she must not have been in any separate room if she'd heard the front door as well. Their visiting friend must've heard her weakness to Sky too. Vanille didn't want her to think their talks hadn't made a difference since Summer came; it was just so hard to function on this level.

Summer cast her a glance that might've been for her, but Vanille was too distracted with this influx to really tell. "I'll get a cloth for her head," Vanille volunteered, scurrying to one of the drawers for it. When she hurried back, Summer had a hand to Serah's head and another over her neck, counting to measure. She pulled back after a moment.

"Her heartbeat is regular and steady." Summer reported. "I think she's just passed out."

"Hawke terrified her," Sky grumbled, unhappy. She went to Vanille's back as Vanille laid the water-warmed cloth over Serah's head. "Of course she passed out."

"I did not!" Hawke objected, all confused. "We were having a nice walk!"

"Until you opened your mouth," Sky pointed out.

"I opened my mouth before that and Serah liked it!"

"Ugh," Sky shuddered. "I don't need the visual."

"Hawke?" Serah gently asked.

"Ooh," Vanille touched her head above the towel. "She's waking up!"

"Vanille?" Serah turned her head, making the cloth drop from over her eyes so she could see Vanille and Sky standing there.

"Serah!" Hawke took her hand, "You're ok!"

Serah looked to Hawke, then glanced around, gathering together her bearings. "Hawke," she finally said again, focusing on her. Hawke touched near her hair gently.

"You passed out," Hawke told you.

"Hawke scared you," Sky corrected.

"I remember," Serah said, taking Hawke's hand in her other as well. She tried to sit up. Hawke helped her. "Hawke…" Serah glanced around again, seeming dizzy. "Um," she half smiled to Vanille, nervous. "Can we talk?"

"We are talking!" Hawke tried to read her funny face, "Oh, you mean alone? Sure, Serah," Hawke dropped her hands and started to lift. "I'll take you to your room."

"Talk is all you better do," Sky growled behind her. Vanille squeezed her hand.

"They'll be okay," Summer settled, "Sky, I wondered if I might borrow Vanille a moment or two."

Vanille's eyes flickered back. She hoped she hadn't offended Summer by her doubts with Sky. It was something she had talked ten times back with Anya and only a couple with Summer on occasional mention, but Vanille felt bad that she wasn't getting better about this. She wasn't healing, despite the help from her friends and family.

"Everything okay?" Sky double checked.

Summer nodded, "Everything's fine; I'd just like her opinion on something."

Sky patted her back with a little whisper for Vanille. "We'll talk later, Van."

"Okay," Vanille agreed, following after Summer to her temporary room on the ground floor. She closed the door behind her for their privacy, the soundproof walls sealing in the noise with the door's closing click. "I'm sorry," Vanille apologized immediately, "I don't mean to dwell, it's just— "

"Vanille," Summer interrupted softly, "Please; I'm not going to reprimand you about feeling glum for the misfortune that's befallen you."

"Oh…"

"Why don't you sit down," Summer issued Vanille into her room by the bed, sitting with her.

"I still don't mean to dwell," Vanille offered weakly, apologetic.

"Mourning is healthy, Vanille," Summer chided gently. "Take all the time you need; it's a big thing to digest."

Vanile lowered her head, staring at her lap. Everyone was being so kind and sweet to her about her ordeal. No one voiced the real concern about such a tragedy it was for Sky. They should be sweeter to Sky more, not her, being the cause of the pain. "What'd you want to talk to me about?" Vanille asked, glum of heart.

"It's about Sky," Summer said, again raising Vanille's eyes.

"What about Sky?" Vanille asked with weak eyes.

"I overheard a little," Summer confessed freely to Vanille's nod. It was hard not to be overheard in Yun territory. "Specifically, you offering to abandon Sky so she can find another woman."

"It's right, isn't it?" Vanille said meekly, emotional eyes turning away, "Sky isn't the type to mate two women. She'll never have another baby as long as she's with me."

"Vanille, it isn't." Summer touched her leg with the care of a mother, "Leaving Sky would only bring both of you more heartache."

"Only for a little while," Vanille claimed, "A few years… then we could both go on and Sky could find another girl, someone who could give her a family."

"Sky could find another girl?" Summer chided, "She loves you, Vanille. Losing you would be like mourning your death, except worse because you're still alive and abandoned her by choice. It would scar Sky all her life if you left her. You know how much she loves you, Vanille. You know how Sky is."

"But…" Vanille looked down at her knees, heart shriveling in her chest. "She deserves to be happy."

"Which she is with you," Summer pushed gently.

"Is she?" Vanille almost slumped. "Or will she be, when I can't provide…"

"Sky doesn't love you for the future generations you might or might not provide, Vanille," Summer coaxed. "She signed on the mate you, and the Sky I know won't abandon that for anything. If you break it off with her, she's just going to follow you and try to get you back again. Don't put her through that, Van. She's faced enough rejection already." Summer rubbed her knee, "It's not easy for her to hear that you might leave her over this, you know?"

"You… " Vanille swallowed hard, feeling sick to her little belly. "You think I'm hurting her more."

"I know Sky will never agree to breaking up with you," Summer said gently, "And I know how she feels about you. What if you were in her place, Vanille?"

"Gods," Vanille's eyes burned, "I'm screwing it up so bad."

Summer squeezed her knee, then circled the arm around Vanille to give her a little half-hug. "Grief makes us see things one way, Vanille. Don't be too hard on yourself." She rubbed up the girl's arm. "Just be ready to show Sky it's not true, right?"

"I will," Vanille mumbled through her tears, "I'm sorry, Sky…" Summer rubbed her arm again, holding her in to give Vanille a moment to gather herself. The tears took a few of them to clear. Vanille leaned against Summer's comfort for support, closing her eyes until they faded.

"Summer?" Vanille called softly when she'd gotten ahold of her breath.

"Van?"

"Why did you deny Sky?" Vanille asked scratchily, throat a little raw from suppressed tears. "I know I'm biased in asking you, and you don't have to answer if it's private, but…"

"It's okay, Vanille," Summer squeezed her arm. "I don't mind sharing with you. The first time I rejected Sky was because we were both so young. Sky especially; she was only fifteen the first time she asked, and I was twenty. That was five years ago, after I had Rivera."

"Sky does tend to jump in headlong," Vanille agreed, picturing a miniature, little Sky proposing matehood at that age. "Is that why you said no the second time too? Because she's so young?"

Vanille felt Summer shake her head, "That's not it. She was still too young, but after Ember, my heart didn't belong to me any longer."

"Fang?" Vanille asked. Summer smiled softly.

"Since I was 21 and first met that girl," Summer admitted freely, "She was young too, barely older than Sky, but you know Fang." Summer told her gently. "I knew."

"You were in love with her," Vanille whispered.

"That's true." Summer confirmed softly, "Sky made me happy, but with Fang… "

"I understand," Vanille said softly, "It took a lot from Sky before I loved her too, and I never stopped loving Fang."

"She has that affect," Summer agreed. "I even arranged a threesome with Sky and Fang to see if Sky might ever get along that well with Fang."

"Is that what that was about?"

"You know about it?"

"Fang told me," Vanille explained, "And then Sky, in painful exactness, told me she and Fang never touched during it."

Summer smiled amusedly. "They really didn't. It was the most terrible threesome you've ever seen, Vanille. Like a, your turn, my turn, sorta thing. Sky wouldn't even watch," She chuckled a little, "They weren't compatible like I had hoped."

"You wanted to mate both of them," Vanille picked out.

"I wanted to see at one time, yes," Summer agreed, "But both are singular-romantic when they find a mate. And my heart wanted Fang."

"But…" Vanille worked her jaw to find the words, "But I…"

"You beat me to her," Summer voiced, rubbing up Vanille's arm. "Three months after." Vanille didn't know why she'd never connected these dots before. She knew Summer loved her, but had never paced out the timing of it in her head. "It's okay, Vanille," Summer reassured softly, "She was happy with you."

"You should've told me!" Vanille finally blurted, "I didn't know it was then! I would have shared Fang!"

"Vanille, you're sweet," Summer stroked her arm, "Fang had eyes for nobody after you. She's as singularly-devoted as Sky. You know that."

"But…"

"It's okay, Vanille," Summer reassured again, "Fang was happy with you, and that's what was best for her."

"Until the accident," Vanille added, looking down again. "I took both Sky and Fang away then… oh, Summer, I'm sorry!" Vanille was overcome with another wave of pain. She hadn't just taken Fang from her then, she'd taken Sky too. "I took both of you from them…" Vanille whimpered.

"Vanille," Summer chastised. "None of that is yours to fault. You love Fang as I do. There's nothing wrong about that."

"I'm still sorry."

"And still being silly," Summer added, "Fang… maybe happy with Lightning now. I don't know how you don't fall for that woman. So, maybe she's happy again, Vanille."

"Maybe…"

XXX

"I really like you, Hawke," Serah tried to explain, "Like a lot."

"I sense a but coming," Hawke lowered her head sadly.

"I'm just not ready for matehood," Serah exhaled in a rush, "I mean, maybe someday if things went well between us, but to jump from being friends to mated…"

Hawke's eyes furrowed. "Mate?"

"Isn't that what you asked me?"

"Date," Hawke corrected her mind-frazzled girl, "I said date, not mate, Serah. I wanna 'date' you."

"Ohh…" Serah stared at the door in wonder, "You get on a knee to ask me out?"

"I thought it'd be romantic!"

"Hawke..." Serah gazed with starry eyes, "You're so sweet."

"Thank you!" Hawke nodded, spirits returning. "But yeah, Serah, date! I'm willing to do it the Cocoon way too. We don't have to go fast. And long distance is usually tough, right? But I can wait for you if you're coming back. I can wait for you, Serah. I wanna do this thing right by you. You might have to tell me a few more things about dating… but I'm willing to learn. I wanna go out with you… if you'll have me."

"Hawke…" Serah looked a little pale.

"You're not gonna faint again, are you?"

Serah looked at her with such light in her eyes, it lit up her whole face. In another second, she was kissing Hawke with her hands cupping Hawke's cheek. She stayed for a long moment too, letting Hawke tickle her lips with her tongue. When she parted, Hawke grinned dazedly. "Is that a yes?"

Serah kissed her again. Hawke soared.