Welp. It's not Sunday and it's certainly not the day after my next update...uh, that was the original plan, but then it didn't work out very well. BUT it's here now so I hope you all thoroughly enjoy it! :D I was actually going to update yesterday but I got called into work so...feel free to egg my place of employment. :P
Ellie: Well, I'm glad that you stumbled upon it! And that you think it's one of the best, that serious means so much to me! :') Such a high compliment, so thank you!
Mara152: Thank you so much! :') I'm glad you liked it, hopefully I don't disappoint!
twin who likes to travel: Haha, that is a cool coincidence! How has the writing the ending gone? I'm glad you were managing to build up some excitement, even if it's just to end it: and any form of fluff is usually enough for readers to forgive hiatuses. :') As for my story, I'm glad you're still reading, and uh, I'm curious as to what Jessie will do for her coming out, too! She's such a strong girl but man, coming out is a tsunami of adrenaline for even the toughest people. So we shall see, thank you so much for sticking with this so long! :) I hope everything works out for your other fic!
guest: Hello there! I'm glad you like the update! But yes, regrettably, the updating has stagnated, and probably will be for a while. Life is quickly taking shape, but I don't plan on abandoning this. I said I would finish it, and I will...maybe in 10 years (yikes, hopefully not!), but I will! ;) I hope you'll stick around!
stine517: I will be sure to keep them coming! I think you'll like this chapter a lot if you're looking for a J/K fix. :P
troglodytic: ERH MAH GERD! :D No, thank you! I'm so excited you enjoyed it!
antlan87: Thank you so much! I'm glad you noticed, that was sort of what I was going for! Resolving all issues in one episode wouldn't be any fun!
Okay I guess I'm putting the disclaimer down here now: YOU GUYS! IF SOMEONE COULD TAKE TWILIGHT FANFICTION AND TURN IT INTO FIFTY SHADES OF GREY, DO YOU THINK IF WE BOMBARDED O&A WRITERS ENOUGH WITH THIS, THAT THEY WOULD GIVE ME THE RIGHTS?! :D No? ...Yeah you're probably right. I'm not making money off of this O&A people, I just really want to continue the magic. Pleaseeee don't sue my bank account is non-existent...
Enjoy it! :)
Episode 4.11: Raising Cain:
Eli couldn't help but smile at his sister as she ran out of the kitchen, backpack in hand, and shoving some form of food in it. Probably carrots, she'd been on a carrot kick.
"Gonna be late Jess," he called, leaning against the door, to which she stuck her tongue out at him.
"Yeah right Eli, only if you drive like a grandma." She shot, zipping up her bag.
Eli made a thoughtful face. "Hmm, maybe I will."
Jessie's playful gaze turned into a glare as she swung her pack on. "You better not! I was late my first day of school last year and I do not want a repeat,"
"You're lucky I'm not making you take the bus," he chided, jingling the keys in his hand to emphasize his point.
"You're lucky mom let you borrow the keys," she retorted, coming at him. He stepped aside as she pulled open the front door and headed out to the minivan, Eli hot on her heels and shutting the door behind him.
He didn't say anything as he got into the car, holding back a huge grin as Jessie shut her door. He held his expression until he shut his own door, closing them off from prying ears.
"So tell me all about her," He said, turning to his sister, huge grin now plastered on his face.
Jessie rolled her eyes but laughed. "God, I will! But only when you start driving, alright? I really don't want to be late!"
"Party pooper," he muttered, but listened and turned the key in the ignition. He hadn't even made it out of the driveway before he turned to her, raising his eyebrows as though to say "So?!"
Jessie grinned at him. "She's amazing. And so cute. She does this thing where she doesn't really smile but the corners of her lips turn up and then she lets them drop…"
Eli wolf-whistled, to which his sister retaliated by punching him.
"Don't be gross," she chided, but he only gave her a sidelong glance.
"Don't even deny that you've been dying to talk about this. Honestly Jess," Eli started, before pausing to check for traffic at the stop sign. He continued when he was sure no one was coming. "I've been waiting to have this talk with you forever."
He could feel his sister's confused gaze on him.
"You mean since I told you?"
"Uh, no," Eli elaborated. "Like, for years."
"What?!" Jessie whacked him again.
"Hey, don't hit the driver!" he laughed, swatting her away and swerving a little.
"What do you mean 'years'?!" she asked, sounding shrill, but Eli could hear the mild curiosity behind her words.
"Well, I mean, come on Jessie," he looked affectionately at her, meeting her slightly slacked jaw and baffled gaze. "You always wanted to play basketball with me and the guys. You never knew when a guy liked you, or even flirted with you. You had no interest in sex ed, I got to hear all about it," he rolled his eyes. "And I don't know, I'm your older brother. I just sort of put all the pieces together. You never really seemed to be happy, especially when everyone started pairing up in middle school. You liked hanging out with me more than your friends. You sure did look up to Carla," he chuckled. "I couldn't really place my finger on why, but you were different Jessie. Not in a bad way, just different. You seemed more upset about it than me, to be honest."
"So wait," Jessie shook her head, blinking back disbelief and amusement, though slight hurt that he saw flash through her eyes. "You…knew?"
Eli shook his head. "Nah, I didn't know, but like, I knew something was up. So I was really surprised when-"
He couldn't finish because he got slapped again. "Eli!" his sister practically shouted, haughtily. "Why didn't you tell me?!"
"What was I supposed to say?! You were bawling all over the place, what was I gonna say 'Oh that explains a lot, cool!' That is so not what you needed Jessie," he reminded her, and he looked over to see her slit her eyes at him.
"So you knew?" she asked again, and Eli threw his hands up, off the wheel, just for a second.
"Yep! Totally, now tell me about her!" he drilled, bringing them back to the original conversation, and causing Jessie to (reluctantly) smile.
"Well if you're so damned smart, you already know who she is." Jessie huffed, folding her arms and leaning back in her chair. She set her jaw, but kept sending him sly glances that let him know she wasn't really all that upset.
Eli raised an eyebrow at the road. "Do I already know who it is?" he asked curiously.
"Seriously Eli?" Jessie asked, sounding slightly disbelieving.
"I do?" he perked up, higher than he already was. "Oh my god, is it that girl who-"
Jessie laughed. "Eli! It's Katie!"
The van jerked forward as Eli slammed on the brakes as the streetlight ahead of them turned red, and whirled around, eyes wide.
"What?!" he almost shouted, and Jessie looked torn between wondering if he was being genuine or sarcastic. "I mean, I was going to ask you how Katie was taking the news of you being gay but, really?!"
Jessie laughed, still uncertain, "Yeah?"
Eli turned back to the road, mouth falling open with pride and slight disbelief. "She's really hot," he said, almost as an afterthought, which made Jessie laugh.
"Yeah, I know!" she responded, and Eli nodded his approval.
"Very nice," he commented, glancing over at his sister.
She scowled at him. "Eyes off my girlfriend!" she semi-sneered.
"Pfft," Eli replied. "When the time comes, eyes off of mine!"
He pulled up to the curb, right near the school, parking the van with a jolt and beaming at his sister, who looked back at him, trying not to let the corners of her mouth twitch.
"Deal."
...(Credits)
Grace's skin itched beneath the light sweater she'd decided to wear. She scratched at it absentmindedly, eyes taking in all of the familiar faces of her peers, scanning here and there. She barely kept track of where she was walking: classes weren't starting yet and really, she knew where all of the lockers were. She'd already stopped at hers, showing up early to school, as always. But with no books and a flimsy, almost empty bag, save for a summer assignment, she didn't have much in the way of a distraction.
So she walked, smiling at her friends and peers as they smiled at her. She wouldn't admit it, but though she loved academia, and really, everything about school (okay, maybe not everything, but she still thoroughly enjoyed learning), she wasn't happy to be there.
B+W Testimonial: Grace purses her lips, chin resting on her clasped hands: "People always make a big deal out of these 'demons', shadows of their doubts and things like that, coming back to them when they thought they'd banished the things back to hell. When they think they're over something, they're surprised when these shadows come back to bite them, they're surprised by things like regret or embarrassment: like they're actually over whatever it was that got to them, or that they did. Even if they gave themselves plenty of time, even if they were thorough and resolute in exorcising their past life…demons never let go. They're shadows, always there, just easier to ignore in the right light." She pauses, "So easy we forget they're there. But they are. They never go away, and that's what makes us who we are. Our demons are our definition. Or rather…our definition is how we embrace them…" she shrugs, "People can't live without regrets. They can only turn the light up a little bit brighter."
She could still hear the rumors, and could feel the curious stares, and she knew it was only the beginning.
With a heavy sigh, she tightened her hold on her backpack and continued on her way, careful to steel herself against attacks she probably wasn't going to get. But still…it was better safe than sorry, and she'd had enough of being sorry. She'd had enough of being sad, and she'd had enough of pretending, so with renewed vigor, she put a spring in her step and an almost genuine smile on her face and started searching for the faces of actual friends, instead of the virtual strangers that made up her class and schoolmates.
A few twists and turns and greetings later, she was back at her locker, but with a surprising development, one Katie Singer leaning against a locker remarkably close to hers. Grace raised an eyebrow but continued forward, happy, at the very least, to have the distraction.
"Hey Katie," she greeted as she approached, and Katie looked up from the book she was nervously skimming.
"Oh, hey Grace!" the lanky girl answered, mustering up a smile that put Grace's fake one to shame, it shone so bright. If it weren't for the mild panic in Katie's eyes, Grace might have bought it.
"Nervous for the first day back?" Grace questioned amicably, turning to her locker and starting to twist the combination to her new lock, which she had memorized as soon as she'd received the locker assignment. It was a small source of pride that already, she'd technically learned something new.
"Nervous for the homework I forgot we had," Katie answered honestly, snapping the book shut. "I have a study hall second period though, so I might be able to rush something together."
"What class is it for?" Grace snapped her locker open with a metallic click that echoed the many going on in the hallway already.
"Short Stories," she shook her head, "Honestly I don't even know why I'm in that class but thankfully, the stories are short," she chuckles, "Duh, so writing a report on 3 shouldn't be too hard."
Grace clicked her tongue but didn't bother pointing out that short stories could be anything from a few paragraphs to ten pages, but Katie already looked defeated about it, so she kept her mouth shut. "Good luck," she said instead.
"Thanks locker buddy!" Katie grinned, a genuine one, and pointed to the lockers she was leaning on. "Top one's mine, bottom one is that Brody kid. He's nice though, he's letting me borrow his calculus homework."
Grace raised an eyebrow, "Did you do any homework this summer, Katie?"
The girl shrugged sheepishly. "Yeah, actually. But my calculus looked like the Russian alphabet and I'm pretty sure if I handed it in the way it currently looks I would fail immediately. I'm just checking my answers with his, he actually knows what he's doing, you know?"
"I don't know him that well," Grace admitted. "But, sure. That's nice of him." She smiled.
Katie nodded. "Yeah, he's a cool kid." A pause, and then, "So, hey, did you give Jessie a ride this morning?"
Grace shook her head and turned her attention to the interior of her locker, relatively bare for the new year, save for a few pieces of tape left over from the previous owner. She'd have to decorate it…
"No, she was at her mom's so she either got the bus or had Karen take her in," Grace turned and gave the girl a small smile. "But she'll definitely be here, she's been talking non-stop about being on time for school for the last week. It was actually really annoying," Grace furrowed her brow, "And I still got here before her!" she grinned jokingly and Katie returned it.
"Oh god, don't even get me started, I forgot to set my alarm this morning so the only reason I was up at all was because Tad called me like, 6 times to wake me up," she chuckled, "That kid knows me way too well."
Grace stared at her incredulously and was about to open her mouth to ask how Katie even managed school, and not only managed it, but apparently was quite adept at it, while simultaneously managing to be the worst at it. It was a marvelous, enviable talent, but Grace wasn't really all that impressed, just surprised. She would hate to be like that, honestly. So flippant and letting the chips fall where they may…it was too much chaos.
Jessie bounced up to them before she had even shut her mouth after thinking better of asking the question. She'd still probably ask…eventually, but Katie's face was alight and Jessie's was bright and Grace gagged audibly at the obvious eye-sex, not that either girl noticed.
"Hey Grace," Jessie managed to say, eyes never actually on her step-sister, "Katie," a full-blown smile over took her, and Katie mimicked the look.
"Billie," she greeted, but that was all for conversation as Jessie grabbed the taller girl's wrist and pulled her down the hallway.
"Later locker buddy!" Katie managed to call before they disappeared, and Grace just shook her head.
"Later," she answered, closing her locker, excited nerves settling into the quiet din of the crowding hallway.
...
It was probably the talk in the car with her brother, but Jessie was feeling confident. Extremely confident. So confident that she didn't even realize that dragging Katie by her wrist through the halls might be interpreted as more than friendship, but even if she had, she probably wouldn't have cared less. She was smiling so huge, her fingers warm and starting to sweat around that bony wrist she loved so much.
"Billie," Katie chuckled, as Jessie pulled them around a corner and kept blazing a trail through students, eyes swinging back and forth, back and forth, darting around at the students and at the doors and trying to decipher which ones might be open and easiest to enter.
"Billie, where are we going?" Katie prodded, but Jessie just turned and grinned at her deviously.
"You'll see," she answered, since she herself wasn't entirely sure. She wasn't sure of a lot of things, but her feet were driven and her heart was drumming a steady, excited beat in her chest, a reasonable level of adrenaline accompanying her confidence and putting an extra spring in her step, an extra glint in her eyes, and she knew it as soon as Katie's own lit up at the sight of her.
"Is it a surprise?" Katie quipped, but Jessie shook her head.
"Probably not," she said, turning quickly to see an amused but decidedly confused expression adorning Katie's features. "Or…maybe," she returned her attention to the hall. Students buzzed around them, conversations floating into her ears and out, but she wasn't seeing what she was looking for, and she was vaguely frustrated.
"What time is it?" she shot back to Katie, pulling them around another corner.
"We have like ten minutes before the late bell," Katie answered, and Jessie bit her lip, pausing in her demanding walk and looking around the intersection they'd come to.
"Something up, Billie?" Katie asked into her ear, the taller girl's breath hitting the shell of Jessie's ear and making her shiver.
"Oh, definitely," Jessie answered, deciding on a direction with new determination.
A strangled noise escaped her throat when she found what she'd been searching for: a dark room with the door slightly ajar. Abandoned and boring on the first day of school. It was one of the older classrooms, which was still shut down to finish painting, or something. There was a sign but Jessie thoroughly ignored it as she pushed the door open and brought Katie inside, quickly peeking around the room and then into the hallway before shutting the door.
The outdoor sunlight cut into the empty room through slits in the blinds, and the entire thing looked pathetically empty, with all of the chairs pushed to the middle. Paint cans were over in the corner but Jessie didn't focus long on the room that still wasn't ready, even for the first day of classes. She vaguely wondered who would have the room when it was done, but she had more pressing matters, Katie's wrist still warm in her hand.
She let go immediately.
"Jessie, what-" Katie was cut off immediately as Jessie spun around and pushed the older girl, with a surprising amount of force, onto the closed door.
"Hi," Jessie hushed, before standing on her toes and kissing the taller girl, Katie's retort dying in her throat. Jessie could feel it as Katie's vocal chords vibrated and then halted, their breath mingling.
Jessie pulled away, grinning at Katie, whose eyes popped open in surprise.
"Uh, hi," she managed, and Jessie just grinned, leaning forward again and capturing the taller girl's lips.
Her confidence surged again when she pulled back, dove back in, and with a quick swipe of her tongue was allowed entrance into her girlfriend's mouth, meeting it. Jessie had never really understood the teenage obsession with making out, but really, the more she did it, the more she got it. There was just something so satisfying about feeling Katie's ribs shudder as her breathing picked up, something magical about the temperature of her mouth, the same as Jessie's but feeling so much hotter, slick and inviting.
And the noises. Katie's thick hair that she bunched up between her fingers as she slid them into the taller girl's tresses from the nape of her neck, pulling at her hair while simultaneously pulling her closer. Even the occasionally uncomfortable clack of teeth meeting never really put a damper on this thing she'd come to love, look forward to, and initiate.
She pulled one hand out of Katie's hair just as Katie wrapped her arms around her neck, pulling them closer, and Jessie let both of her hands drop to Katie's hips before pushing her own forward, egged on by the encouraging swipe of the older girl's tongue against her lip. The gasp that followed, the slight banging sound from essentially slamming Katie's backside onto the door, effectively pinning her, had Jessie pretty close to delirious, she was sure. She pulled away with a gasp, the air filtering through her nose not enough to keep up with the cadence of her heartbeat, increasing the hotter and closer they got.
With her palms, cold and flat against Katie's hipbones, she could feel the goosebumps erupting on her girlfriend's abdomen, and a familiar sensation of surprise that she was causing this washed over her. She was causing the rosy lips to puff, the tamed hair to be unruly. For the hot flesh to burn hotter, the eyes to become darker.
"Wow," she muttered, nose so close to Katie's that she had to be slightly cross-eyed to see properly.
"Uh, yeah," Katie answered, breathing heavy, puffs cooling the sweat that had built on Jessie's forehead without her permission (or conscious recognition). The older girl smiled softly. "I…what brought that on?"
Jessie would have shrugged, but that would mean moving her hands, even just a little, and though she hadn't told Katie yet, her hipbones were one of her favorite things about her thus far. They didn't jut out, but they weren't exactly hidden, and they just made the flat stomach above them seem more muscular than it was. It was aesthetically pleasing, sure, but the feeling…there was nothing like it. They looked like there would be hard muscle, but it was deceiving. And Jessie liked…loved the contrast. Loved the softness.
And with a tender smile she leaned forward and captured her girlfriend's soft lips with her own, keeping the kiss light this time, though her hands stayed planted on Katie's hips, slightly beneath her shirt.
"I love you," she whispered between the feather-light touches of their lips, and slowly moved her hands up Katie's hips, up and up, torturously slow, and couldn't help but smile when Katie's breathing hitched.
"I love you too," Katie answered, after a very long pause when her breathing got the better of her.
"I love you," Jessie said again, though it wasn't the words she wanted to use. She didn't know what she wanted to use just…words to say thanks. That she told her brother, and she wanted to tell other people. That her brother now officially knew about them and loved her for it and joked with her, and everything was better than it had been, a possibility that had seemed so distant for so long.
She wanted to thank her for sticking around, for not giving up, for putting up with her. To tell her even though her words might stick, her heart was true. She wanted to but she was still gathering the courage, and the words for all of that went instead into the kiss, into the soothing touch of the pads of her fingers as they traced the softness of Katie's belly, soft and pliable and so incredibly perfect.
She couldn't find the words and so she was stuck with a full "I love you," but Katie didn't answer, just pulled Jessie closer, bodies flush together and forcing the younger girl's palms to wrap around to the small of Katie's back.
"Mmm, we should do this every morning," Katie noted, and kissed her nose. She graduated to her lips when Jessie started to pout, and right as Katie's tongue dared to ask for permission, the earsplitting bell tore through the empty room, making Jessie jump, pulling away.
"Crap…" she managed to say through her closing throat, adrenaline (and not the good kind) shooting through her from the unwelcome reminder of the reality right outside of that damned door.
The sounds of bustling students running to their classes for the very first day was only emphasized when Katie pushed on her gently.
"Much as I love this Billie, Grace has told me you don't want to be late for your first day," a devilish glint played in her eyes, "And though I'm okay with skipping class altogether, I'm not going to be the one responsible for making you late. Come on," she pecked Jessie then and slipped from her grasp, reaching down and grabbing her messenger bag, abandoned on the floor.
Jessie blinked. She hadn't even seen her drop it, and she had forgotten all about her promise to not make herself late.
"That was just the first bell…" she said absentmindedly.
Katie just laughed. "Babe, that was the first bell. We have four minutes until the next one, and though I'm all for pushing our luck, I'm not going to be on the receiving end of one of Grace's angry glares when she figures out I'm the reason you're late on your first day of school, and you complain about it."
"I wouldn't complain," Jessie pouted, sending her girlfriend a glare.
Katie nodded. "Oh-kay Jess," she teased, "My hair look okay?" she brought a hand to it. It wasn't horrible but…well, it definitely looked like someone had had their way with it.
Jessie blushed but nodded. "Uh, yeah, fine. Mine?"
Katie stepped forward, pushing some loose strands behind Jessie's ears.
"Perfect," she said, and leaned in, quickly stealing another kiss. "But now, I'm gonna go, and I don't know if you want to take a minute or not, but, I'll see you at lunch, okay?" with another smirk and a wave, Katie pulled open the classroom door and was immediately swept into the second wave of kids, freshman, by the looks of it, still frantically trying to find the rooms they needed.
Jessie touched her lips and couldn't help the grin that pulled at them as she adjusted her bag and looked at the clock, deciding to wait just one more minute.
Wee! Yes, it was a bit of a filler part, but I figured most of you wouldn't mind. ;) Plus this gives me a little more time to get the rest of the episode together! Anyway, and as always, likes, didn't likes, and just any reviews/favorites/follows are appreciated (and slightly fangirled over), but so is the fact that you sat down and read this, so I hope you liked it, and I'll see you all soon!
