Maia dropped her sippy cup to the floor and then stretched her hands out toward Connor. He was holding the half of her cookie that she hadn't eaten yet. He gave her the treat back and she went back to gnawing on the corner of it, spreading crumbs across the hardwood floor as she did so. She felt Jude's fingers at the back of her head but didn't say a word. She liked it when her daddies played with her hair.

Jude pulled one of Maia's curls straight and then, "Oh! I almost forgot."

"Forgot what?" Connor asked as Jude leant over and grabbed one of the bags from the drug store. They'd made a quick stop after Camera Obscura for a few odds and ends.

Jude slid away from Maia, across the floor. She hardly looked disturbed, as she was still too busy with her cookie. Jude stood up, bag in hand, and walked over to the desk. The little plastic bag that held the snips from Maia's haircut were sitting in the middle of it. Jude opened the drug store bag and pulled out one of the containers he'd found: it was a short, skinny vial that was made of a thin plastic. He poked one of Maia's thick curls into it and then turned around to show Connor.

"So you can take it with you?"

Connor smiled sadly, but he nodded. He'd definitely be taking it with him; any piece of home that he could possibly take with him, he would. Jude tucked it into the corner of Connor's suitcase, and then went back to his boyfriend's side. He sat down heavily on the cold floor and fell into Connor's side.

"We're going to have to pack," Connor whispered.

"When Maia's asleep."

Maia lurched unsteadily to her feet. It wasn't particularly late at night, but last night hadn't been her best for sleeping, and she was starting to look a little tired.

"Where are you going, baby girl?"

She picked Tiana up in her arms and then she hugged the doll tightly to her chest. As Jude and Connor watched, she began to turn in wide circles, dancing with her little doll.

"She needs some music, Jude."

At the prompt, Jude grabbed his computer off the bed and opened it. He put on some fun music and Maia seemed to light up as the lyrics started. She grabbed at Connor's knee, pulling on his pant leg. In a fluid motion, Connor was on his feet, scooping Maia and Tiana into his arms.

"Nn!" Maia corrected and pointed down to the ground.

Connor set her back on her feet, but with a strange look on his face. "Either you're too short or I'm too tall, but I don't know if we can manage this."

Maia dropped Tiana to the floor and wrapped both arms around her legs. Connor bent at the waist and lifted her small feet onto his large ones. "Yep, just try and keep your feet on Dodo's. Give me your hands."

Maia balanced unsteadily and Connor had to hold her tightly. Maia was such a short baby. He knew that thirteen-month-olds weren't known for their height but, even so, Maia was on the small end of the scale. He could already feel ache in his back from the angle, but he didn't care. Every part of him could suddenly start to pain him and it wouldn't make him let go. When Maia seemed a little more confident standing on his feet, Connor took his first step. He felt her fingers tighten against his own as she held on with all her strength.

"You're good at dancing, baby girl!"

Jude curled his legs up to his chest, nearly breathless as he watched Connor dancing with Maia. He wanted to take them and transport them home; watch them dance around their apartment instead. Jude almost felt like crying as he watched the two of them together because, this time tomorrow, they wouldn't be; and because Maia looked so small. She wasn't going to remember this; wasn't going to remember one moment of Edinburgh or Connor. Jude tried to memorize everything – the way the room was a little too warm and how Connor's jeans were wrinkled and how Maia had chocolate smeared over her cheeks – so that he could tell it back to her in a way that would make it feel like a real memory.

The song changed and Connor made a face. "We need something a little more upbeat!"

Happy to play DJ, Jude flipped through their iTunes collection and found something that his boyfriend and his daughter were able to continue dancing to at the same fun pace. His eyes slipped to the Skype icon on his desktop ad he opened it, wondering if, maybe … Yes. April was online. He turned the Skype volume off so the call wouldn't attract attention and waited for her to answer.

(-.-)

April told herself just five more minutes on the computer. She didn't want to get too wrapped up in technology, no matter how many times Connor accused her of being old-fashioned. Record players were better, and that wasn't her fault. She was just about to exit out of her browser when she saw Connor's Skype name appear on screen. Her heart lifted as Jude appeared, an unfamiliar background behind him. She started to speak but Jude held a finger to his lips. April shut her mouth as Jude turned his laptop around and then she had to cover her mouth, because the sight was too precious for her to react in any other way.

Connor had just picked up Maia into his arms and she had her head thrown back, laughing in the child's way: so sweetly that it was heartbreaking. They spun around the room, which had more space than April had thought it would. April's eyes were riveted to her son's face. His happiness was the most beautiful thing to her. She had spent, now, four years of her life worrying about her son in a warzone and she knew that she was going to have to add more years to that. Connor had been an amazing kid; a better teenager; and the best man. To see him happy like this now … Well, the only thing better would be to see him happy at home.

"Oh, they're so cute!" April gushed.

Jude raised her volume so that he could hear her around the music that was still spilling out of the laptop speakers.

Her expression turned a little sad and she pulled on the short strands of her grey hair. "I want … I want to be able to see him dance with her at her wedding."

"Don't you want to see him dance with her at his wedding first?"

April glanced at Jude. "I want everything."

Jude's next words almost became stuck in his throat. "Me too."

"I wish I could take a picture," April mused.

"Screenshot button."

"Huh?"

Jude directed her to it in a low voice and she found it, looking utterly triumphant as she took her very first screenshot. He watched her press it again and again in quick succession.

"Where do the pictures go?"

"Maia and I will find them for you when we get home."

Connor spun around, "Jude, who – Mom! Hi!"

"Hey. And, hello, Maia. I miss you and your … Dodo," April said slowly, trying the word out aloud for the first time.

She'd laughed, of course, when Connor had sent her an e-mail telling her about it, because it was funny; saying it to Connor's face was even more hilarious for her. He smiled down at his daughter at the sound of the nickname. April had been a little on the fence about the name before that moment, because while it was funny, was it really something that, as a parent, you wanted to be known by? But Connor clearly loved it, and that was more than enough to make April love it too.

"How are you doing?" April asked.

"We just like hanging out with the Dodo," Jude replied.

Connor smiled and rested his head on Jude's shoulder.

Everything about the image of the little family was making April feel like singing (or pressing her screenshot button for all it was worth), because they were so cute and she loved all three of them more than she could ever express. She didn't miss Connor picking up Jude's hand in his own as Maia stood up on one of Connor's legs, leaning on Jude and getting into his personal space; the image made her beam. She couldn't have picked a better partner for her son or a better daughter for the two of them had she been allowed to.

"Maia," April called and the little girl looked at her. "Come tell me about your trip! What did you do today?"

"Can you say 'Camera Obscura'?" Jude asked Maia, who shook her head.

April laughed. "Well, it sounds fun! Did you like it?"

"We liked the plasma balls," Connor said.

"The what?"

Jude took over explaining and, while it took April a moment to get it, it was more because she was distracted by Connor again and the way that he was looking at his boyfriend; she was just so glad that her only baby was so happy. It was almost hard to see the stubborn little boy she had given birth to all of those years ago and the impossibly young teenager who had padded home from school one day to tell April all about the boy who would become his best friend and, eventually, his boyfriend. Despite all the years that passed between the two instances, April could draw a straight line from "Mom, there's a new boy at school" to "Mom, I'm in love with him". Honestly, she should have realized sooner who her son had given his heart to.

(-.-)

April stared at her son, who was slumped on the island, turning his cell phone over and over in his hands. She looked him over, trying to gauge if he was hungover, but she really didn't think that he was. She'd only seen Connor hungover once and he'd copped to what was going on with him so quickly that April was sure he'd do it again, if that was the case. There wasn't a lot that her son didn't share with her, and based on what he had told her a few nights previous, she was worried that he was getting stuck inside of his own head. It made a lot more sense than a physical malady.

April abandoned the soapy breakfast dishes in the sink to go and sit next to her teenager, who startled out of his thoughts as one of the tall chairs scraped against the tile floor.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

Connor sighed, his hair flopping into his eyes.

"Is it about the thing with Daria?"

"No! It's got nothing to do with that, Mom. She hasn't talked to me after the other night and I don't want her to. She knows what she wants but it's not me."

"And you don't want her."

Connor shook his head and then his breath came out in another uneasy huff, his fingers tapping across his knees.

"So, if it's not that, then what is it?"

Connor wouldn't look at her, and that made her worried. Connor was such an honest kid – with her, anyway. She knew how rocky his life with Adam was; but that was because Adam was a prick, not because Connor was.

"I can't." Connor bounced the edge of his cell phone off the countertop. "I can't say it."

"You're scaring me," April said bluntly. She pulled the phone out of Connor's hands so that he wouldn't be distracted by it and so that he would turn to face her. There was something in his expression that made him look a little agonized, and April became even more concerned. "I'm here to listen, Connor, but I can't do that if you don't speak."

"You listen to Jude," Connor pointed out, and his cheek twitched.

April didn't miss the small expression. Had something happened between her son and his best friend? She'd hate to see them ever get into a serious argument, although some part of her doubted that it would ever last long. She'd eat every single one of her Runaways records if Jude and Connor ever said a final goodbye to each other.

"Jude speaks without words. You're not saying anything at all. You know you can tell me anything."

"It's not that I'm scared of you knowing," Connor backpedaled. "I know I can tell you everything because I, basically, have. I'm scared of … of … of it being real."

"Whether or not you say it doesn't keep it from becoming real. It might keep you from dealing with it in the right way, however."

Connor clenched his hands into fists and slowly released them. "I … I'm … I really … think …"

April waited patiently, and Connor looked into her, his eyes piercing her soul with the depth of utter emotion in them. The earlier agony she'd glimpsed had been taken over by something even more powerful; and whatever he was feeling was so overwhelming that April wondered if she'd ever felt something that had taken her so completely.

Connor took a deep breath to steady himself and then he said, "Mom, I'm in love with him."

It would have been stupid of her to ask who, because there was only one 'him' so strong in Connor's life to leave an impact that deep.

"What did Jude do?"

"About what?"

"What did he do when you told him?"

Connor's eyes widened and he actually laughed aloud. "Mom! I can't say something like that! It's stupid to even feel it!"

"Feelings aren't stupid," April said. "You're allowed to feel whatever you want."

"Not this!" Connor exclaimed.

"I think that Jude would –"

Connor cut her off with a shake of his head. "I don't want to think about what he might do, because I'll never know. I'll figure out how to get over this, somehow."

"Jude could do something really positive," April continued, not wanting her son to give up so quickly on such a strong feeling. "He could feel the same way –"

"Based on what?!" Connor demanded of his mother; and then April saw an expression ghost across his face that had to come straight from Adam, because April had seen it on her ex-husband's face many times during their marriage. It was the look that Adam had on when he was trying to gain control of himself, thinking that he had shown too much emotion and had become vulnerable. She hated to see that look on Connor's face; feelings were to be felt, not hidden. "Just because he's gay doesn't mean he'll ever love me! He's my best friend and I can't lose him over something so stupid."

"Feelings aren't –"

"Stupid, I know!" Connor seemed to deflate. "I didn't mean to yell at you, Mom."

"It's okay."

"Do you want to know the really stu – ridiculous thing?"

"What?"

"I want to tell him because I tell him everything."

April allowed herself to smile at that. "I don't think this situation is as bad as you've built it up to be in your head. I think that you and Jude have a very close relationship –"

"So what? I'm just making up my feelings because we're close?"

"No, and I'd appreciate not being interrupted."

Connor sealed his lips together and faced his mother, gesturing for her to continue.

"And you understand each other very well," April continued. "Even if he didn't reciprocate your feelings, I don't think that you'd lose him."

"Why take the risk?" Connor asked her.

"Life's about risk."

"Life's not about risking Jude!"

April was taken aback by the ferocity in his statement. The tops of his cheeks were the faintest shade of red and his eyes were wide with passion. April very gently laid her hand over her son's, knowing that, as his mother, she should have the answer to any problem her little boy came to her with. When that problem was scraped knees that required little more than a superhero Band-Aid and a dramatic kiss, April had been confident; she was a little lost when it came to matters of the heart.

"Besides, what about the military? I can't say something if I really do end up going overseas."

"Wouldn't that be all the more reason to say something? No regrets."

"For when I die?" Connor asked, humour in his tone, but April frowned. Just because Connor believed he was invincible didn't mean that he was, although April sorely wanted to believe that her son had the strength and the luck of a superhero. "I'm not going to die, Mom."

"I know, but … a person never wants to leave things unsaid, no matter what the circumstances."

"Dad will kill me because of it. You know what he's like."

"Adam needs to grow up at some point. Granted, it should have been long before now, but, he's your dad, so I'll keep hoping it happens for your sake."

Connor was staring down at the counter again. "You didn't say anything about it."

"About what?"

His voice was little more than a whisper. "About me being gay."

"You haven't said anything about you being gay either," April pointed out brightly, and Connor looked up at her, surprised. "Wouldn't it be wrong to assume that, just because you want to be in a relationship with Jude, you're gay?"

Connor paused, thinking about it. "Yes. But … but I am, Mom."

"Good. I love you, Connor."

"I love you too, Mom."

She kissed the top of his head and he bowed it, letting her. She hugged him briefly before asking, "Do you want to talk more about anything?"

"I still feel –" Connor stopped as his cell phone vibrated. He glanced at April, who slid the device toward him. In a few quick motions, he had unlocked the phone, opened and read a text, and then replied to it. "No. I'm going to get Jude."

"And go where?" April asked as Connor patted at his short pockets, as if he could make his truck keys magically appear in them.

"The lake. Apparently he's 'sweating to death'."

"Your keys are hanging by the door."

"Huh? Oh."

"I found them in the couch this morning."

"Oops."

April rolled her eyes. "Are you sure you're okay? Jude won't die in the next five minutes."

"It's okay. I just need to think about it more," Connor decided. "You won't say anything to anyone, will you?"

"My lips, as always, are sealed."

"Thanks," Connor said. His phone buzzed in his hand again and he shook his head at the text. "I'm coming, I'm coming."

As Connor grabbed his keys and walked out the door, April realized that there was one piece of advice that she should have given her son: you don't just get over a love like that, so you might as well jump in head first.

(-.-)

"And then she tried some ketchup off my plate at supper," Jude told April, "but she didn't like it."

"So she picked as much of it up off his plate as she could and threw it at me," Connor finished.

April laughed. "Does she at least have good aim?"

"Yes! I'll teach her to play baseball yet."

"What's she going to learn first? Fishing or baseball?" Jude asked him.

"Baseball, if only because you'll play catch or something with her." Connor bent forward to look at Maia, who was sitting in Jude's lap, her eyes drooping. "Daddy hates fishing, but I think you're going to love it."

"Based on?"

"A hunch."

"That's a perfectly valid reason, of course," April joked.

"As my mother, aren't you supposed to give me unconditional love and support when it comes to my ideas?"

"He's my son too, don't make me choose between you!" April cried. And then she winked at her granddaughter. "Besides, as one of her many grandmothers, it's my job to spoil her. She's my only grandchild!"

"She's all you're getting, so I'm glad you're happy with her," Connor retorted quickly.

"Maia, don't you want a little brother or sister?" April asked.

Maia's eyes fluttered open. She sucked her bottom lip into her mouth and then decided, "Nnn."

"Then we're all in agreement," Jude said with a nod. "You get to stay an only child."

"That means I'll have to up my spoiling efforts," April mused, and Maia released a giant yawn. "I should go and let you two put her to bed. I'm glad you called."

"I miss you, Mom."

"I miss you too. And I love you, and I'm really proud of you, Connor."

"I love you too."

Jude picked up Maia's hand. "Wave bye to Me-Me."

Maia was so tired that she didn't even try to pull her arm away as Jude waved to her grandmother for her. After another goodbye, April disconnected and Jude shut his laptop. Connor scooped Maia out of Jude's arms and laid her gently on the bed. He quickly changed her diaper and then he buttoned up her soft pyjamas. He settled against the headboard and pulled her into his lap.

"This is the last night that Dodo's going to get to put you to bed for a long time," Connor whispered to her. "So, tomorrow and all the nights after, I need you to be good for Daddy, okay? He's very smart; he knows what he's doing."

Maia pulled on the front of his shirt.

"I'll miss you too, but I'll still talk to you on the phone and on the computer and I'll come home sometime soon. It won't last forever." He cuddled her up his chest. "Dodo will sing you a bedtime song. I know you're very tired."

"Dodo will wait five seconds," Jude said from the floor. "Did you see where I left my phone?"

"Is it still in your coat? I haven't seen it since dinner." As Jude grabbed for his jacket, Connor asked, "Why? What are you doing?"

Jude pulled his cell phone from his pocket, quickly tapping the screen. "I want to record you singing to her so that I can play it back to her on the nights you can't call."

Connor eyed Jude's phone as Jude placed it on his shoulder so his voice would be clear on the recording. He knew his singing voice wasn't really that great and he was worried that it would sound even worse on a recording. Even so, he knew that he would make it. The more pieces of himself that he could leave in the hands of Maia and Jude, the better. He cleared his throat and Jude started recording.

"Talk to me softly,

"There's something in your eyes,

"Don't hang your head in sorrow,

"And please don't cry,

"I know how you feel inside I've,

"I've been there before,

"Somethin's changin' inside you,

"And don't you know,

"Don't you cry tonight,

"I still love you baby,

"Don't you cry tonight,

"Don't you cry tonight,

"There's a heaven above you baby,

"And don't you cry tonight,

"Give me a whisper,

"And give me a sigh,

"Give me a kiss before you,

"Tell me goodbye,

"Don't you take it so hard now,

"And please don't take it so bad,

"I'll still be thinkin' of you,

"And the times we had...baby,

"And don't you cry tonight,

"Don't you cry tonight,

"Don't you cry tonight,

"There's a heaven above you baby,

"And don't you cry tonight,

"And please remember that I never lied,

"And please remember,

"How I felt inside now honey,

"You gotta make it your own way,

"But you'll be alright now sugar,

"You'll feel better tomorrow,

"Come the morning light now baby,

"And don't you cry tonight,

"And don't you cry tonight,

"And don't you cry tonight,

"There's a heaven above you baby,

"And don't you cry,

"Don't you ever cry,

"Don't you cry tonight,

"Baby maybe someday,

"Don't you cry,

"Don't you ever cry,

"Don't you cry,

"Tonight."

Maia had fallen asleep long before he had finished his song. Connor pressed a kiss to her forehead, whispering, "I love you, baby girl."

Jude tapped his phone and turned the recording off. He wrapped his arms around Connor tightly, trying to calm his boyfriend's trembles. "We love you too."

Connor couldn't say a word; he just let Jude surround him, wishing that the embrace would never end.

Don't forget to send me playlist ideas if you have them! This week's songs are actually to go with next week's chapter, I just wanted you to have them early, and they are: Before The Goodbye by Britney Spears and Heaven by Kira Isabella.

So, on tumblr I'm: we are all of legend now (with dashes between every word). If you want to find my replies to anon reviews, add backslash anon dash replies. If you want to see anything I post about Never Say Goodbye, add backslash never dash say dash goodbye

I don't own anything recognizable.

~TLL~