for all those who don't read wmic I needtell. you guys again I am. so sorry. I broke My wrist being stupid on a trampoline.

yep . crazy shit happens inthelife of ladee.

I can't type verywell and I'm not. supposed to be doing itat all but I wrote most of this chapter on my tablet but for some reason I'm having technical difficulties and had to use Android speech to text to write this chapter on my phone so there may be some errors but I just had to get this to you all.

hope you enjoy it.

_\_

.*Edward*

I still remember the day Renesmee was born. I remember it vividly. The easy conversations of the early day, the hope I felt before... Before the breaking of the bones.

before she, Bella, dropped to the ground and, so cliche like, before my life changed forever.

I still remember my thoughts. How I thought she, but at the time he, would be a demon, a killer, a hellbound monster. Just like her (his) father.

in that moment I truly thought the despair, the anger, frustration and the utter self-loathing I had felt for myself could not ever possibly be copied. In that moment, at that time, I thought that I could never in all my eternal life, love anyone more than I loved my wife and soulmate Bella.

being wrong is not something I often am but I can admit that I was very wrong about those two things.

solemnly wrong on this day in particular.

I never in all my hundred plus years of being a vampire thought I would ever realize the joy of being a father. once I finally was put in the position i felt immediate hate for my child but the moment she was born she and her mother became my happiness, her safety, her life became priority in mine and I knew that the moment she was born I would have given my life, without hesitation, for her.

that's why I'm sitting here, in Renesmee room Jacob being the only one slightly closer to her than I.

waiting, we're all waiting. Waiting for mine, some type of finding my one and only baby girl will be okay. be the same. be my little Renesmee, the way I remember her; the way she was made.

there was silence,only sound being the rapid beating of her heart, the blood rushing through her veins, the sound of her gently breathing all signs that for now, she was still ours.

I kept trying to tell myself that even if she did change bully, she could turn out like her mother; a newblood with the concsious

I doubt that though.

however, my doubts were nowhere near as pessimistic as Jacob's thoughts.

when Jacob first imprinted on Renesmee , I thought like all the fathers do when they feel like their daughters are being taken from them; the dog had to die.

now, almost a decade later, I look at him as the sonI would never have and one of my best friends. Since the day I finally got over my Jacob - prejudice, I immediately saw how much they were meant to be. How perfect they are for each other because of how and what they are.

that's one thing that Jacob was thinking a lot about. If she changes, will they change? Everything they have, everything they are, change?

I dI didn't think so but Jacob did. It was his main worry, second, and next after her just waking up at all. He didn't see it how I did.

what they are and what they will always be the love for one another will always be right out of my mouth not more so. My opinion didn't matter Jacob himself didn't believe it.

"its been a day and there havebeen no changes... Maybe... Maybe it wont affect her" spoke Bella.

Always the optimist.

I felt her squeeze my hand but I didn't need to look at her to know she was still focused on our daughter or maybe her best friend.

Just when things were going back to their silent ways I heard Emmett running up the side of the wall before I saw his face in the window.

"how is she doing? we're all worried out here, man." I could tell that he was just as worried as the rest of us, thinking about it.

thinking about what could happen to his favorite niece.

that's when Carlisle decided to speak, "well her heart rate is erratic and constantly changing in pace but I can still hear the blood in her body so... we don't really know right now Emmett.."

I could hear the solemn tone in Carlisle's voice.

Everything went silent yet again before Emmett sighed and jumped down the window, hesitantly heading back to the group.

he wanted to stay with us, watch her with us but he knew that Alice, Jasper, Rosalie, Seth and the others wouldn't be able to handle the new and extremely unstable vampires... creations, made by Lucas and Julienne, without him.

when things went silent again I tuned into Jacob's thoughts.

I couldn't tell if he knew I was listening and was too distraught to care or if he was so far gone that he saw nothing but Renesmee.

both possibilities left me feeling sad for my friend.

I knew Somewhat what he was feeling, not knowing if the person who meant the most to him would make it.

I found myself in those thoughts again but only for a moment.

I could hear quick paced breathing and the sound of a heartbeat, unsteady in rhythm.

I immediately looked to my daughter and tuned into her heart.

It only took me about 3.2 seconds to realize that these anomalies were not coming from her but from her fiance.

Both me and Bella were up and by Jacob's shaking body as quickly as inhumanly possible.

"Jacob! Jacob, What's going on?!" Bella said holding Jacob's shoulders and gently shaking him.

He wasn't answering so I focused back on his mind.

.I was shocked by my conclusion of the situation but I knew it was true.

"He's having... the wolf version of a panic attack."

"is that even possible? " My wife asked in a panic.

"I don't know. "

"well, what do we do? !"

I sat thinking of all the times Renesmee forced Jacob to stay over and tell her bedtime stories about the wolves, legends and experience altogether and all the times I would start in the room listening attentively as well.

"Run", I spoke.

that was the only idea that had come to mind.

"we need to get him out. he needs to run and get into his animalIstic instincts. it should help him calm himself. "

she looked at me and I knew she was thinking the same thing as me.

how are we going to get him out of here ... away from Renesmee.?

I didn't know but o knew that we bad to get him out or he'd possibly go into a comatose state, according to Carlisle.

" can we lift him Carlisle? !"

I don't know much about the l reactions a territorial wolf may have but it's worth a shot

I nodded and went to lift Jacob.

As soon aa I touched him he was up and growling animalistically .

I stepped back on instinct and tried to convey to him that he was in no danger.

He looked down to Renesmee sadly before closing his eyes tightly and leaning down to kiss her cheek softly.

He looked back up to me thinking loudly, past the depressing thoughts, "take care of her"

within the second, Jacob was outside running through the woods in his new form half naked and trying not to think about the fiance he was leaving behind.

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if you hadn't heard, I've been handicapped with a broken wrist and am forced to do speech to text on my phone to write this chapter that and man I'm getting super writers block for this story . BUT I PROMISED YOU ALL I WOULDN'T GIVE UP SO I WON'T! !

ill do the best I can but im really busy with four different extra curriculurs, college classes and me time. lol. well hopefully ill see you all next week! ill have my car off! !

xozox I LOVE YOU GUYS SO MUCH! !

P.S this is a filter from Eddie and I think it was okay but my idea for next chapter I think you guys will like a LOT more. hehehe :-D