It was a shame that computers could not say maybe. Was customer X the father of Y? The computer would only say "yes" or "no." What if there wasn't enough information? Any person would tell you "maybe." Most computers would probably say "no." It was a huge problem. Computers didn't even know what to ask next. If the answer was a maybe, the person would ask more questions.
The bigger shame was when people said "maybe." They didn't even have to use the word. Levi groaned, his mind regurgitating the stupid memory again.
He asked her out. It took a month of mustering the courage to ask out the girl who ran the coffee house that served him - Petra. He would come early enough to see her and they would talk. And he fell in love. So, he asked her.
"I'm not interested right now," she said. "I'm sorry – I- I just can't." She didn't look at him. She was awkward. It felt forced. Not that he knew her well enough to support his guess.
Did she mean it? Maybe. "It's not a friend-zone," she continued.
"What?" He couldn't understand.
"I mean-" she stuttered, "I just – not right now, ok?"
But later? Maybe.
He did want to ask for clarification – doing so was only human. But she didn't want to discuss it. Did she fear for losing him as a friend? Maybe. Did she like him and have a hard time saying "no"? Maybe – in fact, she only ever said "maybe." Could she have some other reason? Maybe.
And she did care for him. She always had his coffee and he was sure she had reduced the price for him. She listened in on his rants. She even seemed keen to learn about his world of computing. But was she just being friendly? Maybe.
He blinked as his code, focussing on focusing. He did have a deadline.
But every morning, he would struggle to leave – just as his mind was struggling to get off the topic. She would hate to have to run the store too. They both preferred talking. They both wanted to spend time together. They always drew up plans. Their meetings ended with the prospect of the next. It was implied that there would always be a next. Did she want there to be because she loved him? Maybe.
He decided to try for openness. He sighed, able to work thanks to the sense of resolution.
Next morning, he tested it out. "Petra, I wanted to know… just out of curiosity… do you like me… in that way?"
"Levi… I don't want to talk about this." She wasn't looking at him.
"But, it's just a question, I mean-"
"Can we not have to do this? I mean, I consider you my friend and-"
"But, I-"
"Look, if you can't enjoy the friendship, then-"
"I can. I just wish I knew."
"Does it even matter? We're friends alright."
Parting was not quite as difficult that time, but his mind was even more stuck.
It hurt. He didn't know what to think. They were friends. They saw each other every day. Everything was fine, surely. He liked talking to her. He loved that she was even breathing. At least he got to see her.
But did she feel the same way?
Maybe.
Even though he wasn't a computer, he couldn't ask the next relevant question.
(... ah, what a nice indulgent piece.
I hope y'all liked it.
See y'all tomorrow!)
