May 2001
He was woken up the next morning with a loud groan. He had finally finished shooting at around six am and woke up at ten with a PA shaking him awake. He opened his eyes and stared at the young looking PA who looked way too bright eyed and bushy tailed for being up all night.
"What?"
"Your call sheet? You need to be on the set in an hour," the PA said.
"But I'm not working today," Joey said.
"There was a change. You need to be on the set in an hour," the PA said before practically skipping out of the room. Joey kept trying to catch his breath, he needed to be at Monica and Chandler's wedding in a few hours. Although, was there still a wedding? He wasn't sure anymore. He reached for his phone and quickly dialed Ross but instead got his voicemail and hung up. He got up and ran out of his dressing room in search of Mark, the director. He found Mark going over some notes with the director of photography.
"Mark," Joey said, approaching him.
"Joe, you need something?" Mark asked.
"I'm not supposed to be working today. I'm officiating a wedding. I can't-"
"There were some changes in the schedule. You'll be in and out-"
"I have to go," Joey said.
"I'm sorry. We need this shot, it's one scene," Mark said, before turning back to continue talking to the director of photography. This could not be happening. As he walked back to his dressing room, he noticed Richard Crosby stumbling out of his dressing room. How was he hammered already? It was ten in the morning.
"Dude, we gotta shoot today. How are you drunk?" Joey asked.
"'Cause I drank," Richard said, stumbling off.
Joey was starting to get nervous. He was supposed to shoot? What about Chandler? He still had no clue if they had found him. He tried to call Ross again but it went to voicemail. He tried Phoebe and Rachel, both calls went straight to voicemail. He wanted to try again but that overly cheerful PA came by to get him. He was needed on set.
He wasn't sure where Richard Crosby was finding this booze but he seemed to be getting drunker and drunker which kept delaying everything. Even worse, he wasn't even sure if there would still be a wedding to officiate. There was a lunch break and he still could not get a hold of anyone and he still could not get off the set and he wanted to somehow find the bottles that Richard Crosby was drinking and smash them over his head. Joey had no clue where he was getting these bottles.
Finally, about a half hour before the wedding was scheduled to begin, he was able to reach Rachel. She seemed a little sad when she picked up the phone, but he ignored it. He needed to know about Chandler.
"Yeah, Ross found him. He's here. Where are you?" Rachel asked.
"On the set," Joey said.
"Wait….what? You're supposed to be here in like a half hour?"
"I know, I know...I just-I-my co-star is obliterated. I think he's sweating booze and then drinking it."
"Great, now I need to go find another minister."
"Wait, Rachel-"
"I gotta go."
Rachel hung up and Joey looked at the phone. No, he needed to marry Chandler and Monica. That was his role, that was what he had wanted to do. Yes, he was furious at Chandler and he would figure out what the hell had happened but he needed to be there. He walked out of his dressing room and into Richard Crosby's and that's when he came up with the idea. He knew Richard had a driver and maybe he'd get in trouble but Richard was in no condition to shoot anything so he told Richard it was time to go home. He ended up carrying Richard out towards his car and then waved him off. He then walked back in and waited for Mark to realize Richard was gone and once Joey got the okay, he raced off the set and took a cab to the ceremony. He was still in his soldier's uniform and realized he had left everything back at the dressing room. It didn't matter, he needed to get to that wedding. He ran in just as a Greek Orthodox minister was beginning the ceremony. He saw Monica and Chandler at the front, Ross, Rachel and Phoebe, everyone staring at him as he ran towards the front. He was so flustered, so overwhelmed, he could barely catch his breath.
"Okay, I'm sorry I'm late," Joey said after excusing the minister, "I'm-I-my outfit will eventually make sense when you see my movie, Over There, in theaters in May 2002 and-"
"Joey," Chandler said.
"Yes, that's right. Let's get this on the road before you run off again, right Chan," Joey said before realizing what he just said. He hoped Monica hadn't heard but he was pretty sure she had. He looked over at Ross who simply motioned for him to continue, "uhhh…..okay, we-we are gathered here today to join in the marriage of Chandler Bing and Monica Geller in holy matrimony and um-I have left all of my notes in my dressing room so let's just go to the vows, Monica-"
Joey took another breath, he had to breathe as he looked at Monica. He needed to compose himself. He had a lot to say. He watched as Monica composed herself and began.
"Chandler, for so long I wondered if I would ever find my prince. I wondered when it would be my turn. I met you in 1987 and since then I knew, somehow I knew that my prince was also my best friend. For so long, I tried to ignore it, deny it but three years ago, I could no longer run and when I stopped, I realized that everything I had ever wanted had been right there the whole time. You have been what I have been looking for. My soul mate, my prince, my favorite jokester….my best friend and as we go forward into the future, I know we will be able to conquer anything that arises. We have conquered so much already and we are stronger because of it and I cannot wait to spend the rest of our lives together, as husband and wife. Unless you don't want to, you are free to go," Monica said, glaring at him.
Joey grinned at Chandler who simply shook his head. He motioned for Chandler to begin his vows. Ross tapped Chandler on the shoulder but Chandler brushed him off. Joey was curious how Chandler would save this.
"I...I have made many mistakes in life. I've said the wrong the things, done the wrong things...acted too quickly or didn't act at all. But the one thing I am certain of is that you are the woman that I meant to be with. You are the person who makes me better than I ever thought I could possibly be. You make me work harder. You came into my life in 1987 and have never left. Without you, I'm not much of anything. With you, I am complete. There is no one else I want to be with, no one else I want to laugh with, grow old with or be with because as they say when you know, you know and I know. You're it for me, Monica and I've never been more sure of anything. I love you and I will always love you and whatever surprises come our way, I will still love you. Yeah, I'm sure. You're my Sally."
Monica smiled, her eyes filling with tears as Chandler leaned in to kiss her. Joey had to wonder how Chandler always managed to do that. He was very good at smoothing things over. Although, they really weren't supposed to kiss just yet.
"Okay, enough of that….uh…are...rings, damn….okay, Chandler-"
Chandler laughed as Ross handed him Monica's ring. Joey was still flustered. He really had so much wonderful stuff to say and he felt like he was completely blowing it. He hated Richard Crosby.
"Chandler, repeat after me," Joey said trying to remember the words, "Monica, I give you this ring as a symbol as of our vows and with this ring I thee wed."
"Monica, I give you this ring as a symbol as of our vows and with this ring I thee wed," Chandler said.
"Okay, Monica repeat after me," Joey said as Rachel handed Monica the ring, "Chandler, I give you this ring as a symbol as of our vows and with this ring I thee wed."
"Chandler, I give you this ring as a symbol as of our vows and with this ring I thee wed," Monica said.
"Okay, Chandler…..do you take Monica to be your wife, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?" Joey asked.
"I do," Chandler said.
"Do you Monica take Chandler to be your husband, for richer or for poorer, in sickness and in health, till death do you part?" Joey asked.
"I do," Monica said.
"Cool….so now, with the power invested in me and….and I just want to say how thrilled I am and how honored I am to be doing this for two of the best people I've ever known so with the power invested in me and the State of New York. I know pronounce you husband and wife. You gonna kiss her?" Joey asked.
"Yep," Chandler said as he leaned in and kissed Monica. Joey had gotten through it. He wasn't sure how successful he had been but he had survived and his two best friends were officially husband and wife. He would have to talk with Chandler later. That missing beer? Where had Chandler gone?
After the ceremony, the other four walked out and to give Chandler and Monica some time. Joey wanted answers. What the hell had happened?
"Where did you find him? Why did he run?" Joey asked.
"He was at his childhood home, he was watching movies," Ross said.
"I'm no longer his friend," Phoebe said.
"Pheebs," Ross said.
"No, this is ridiculous," Phoebe said.
"Guys, let's yell at him later, okay. Let's just….let's enjoy today and worry about tomorrow….tomorrow," Rachel said.
"I agree," Ross said as the four turned towards the room where the ceremony had been. They walked in and saw Monica and Chandler talking. The six stood together, now a different group of six.
"I can't believe this. It's amazing. You're married," Rachel said.
"I know. We're married," Monica said.
"And...okay, I wanna say something. I'm an asshole. I am so grateful and lucky to have each one of you. Please know that and I am so sorry for what I pulled today. I love this woman," Chandler said giving Monica a kiss. "I got scared not because of committing but...because I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you, Mon-"
"You're not losing me. I promise you. It doesn't matter how badly you fuck up...I'm in this. I'm not leaving this marriage. You are my husband. The fact that you could run off before the wedding and I still married you, that's your proof," Monica said.
"Thank you and to the rest of you...Phoebe, Joey, Ross, Rachel...I am so, so sorry. I promise to get my head out of my ass and be far more grateful that I have friends like you and thanks for not giving up on me. Thank you for being there these last three months. Thank you for always being there. I know I have not made it easy...I want you guys to be okay with me again," Chandler said.
"We are. We always will be...it's just...can you please start making it easier for us to be your friend...'cause that would really help us out," Rachel said.
"Yeah. That would," Joey said.
"I will do my best," Chandler said.
"Alright...now, can we please celebrate?" Monica asked. Chandler agreed.
And celebrate they would. Rachel was right, there was time to discuss the other drama. Now was a time for dancing, for speeches, for everything to be about Mondler and maybe his officiating. He did feel a little guilty. He really had rushed through everything.
"Hey, good job by the way," Chandler said, approaching him as the group began to make their way to the reception.
"Sorry. I know, I was late and I-"
"It's okay. You were there and by the way, I got your message," Chandler said.
Joey cringed remembering his voicemail to Chandler. Yeah, he hadn't been kind.
"I'm sorry...it's just what the hell, man? Seriously, you're gonna run out on Mon?" Joey asked. "After everything?"
"I can't lose her. I just….I mean, what if….what if she figures out she can do better?" Chandler asked.
"What if she already did and is sticking with you anyway," Joey said.
"Or," Monica said, approaching them and linking one arm in Chandler's and the other in Joey's, "what if we stop saying I can do better than Chandler? I mean, that's kinda insulting for both of us….in fact can we all stop saying that? I mean...Chandler is funny, smart, protective, sweet, generous, talented, looks incredibly hot in a suit. How can I do better?"
"Thanks, Mon," Chandler said.
"You're welcome," Monica said, kissing him and turning towards all of them, "I really do hate that when you say I can do better than Chandler, so can we please stop. It's the worst thing to say. 'Cause to me...this man is incredible and I am so lucky and so honored that he has chosen to spend the rest of his life with me."
"Feeling is mutual. I'm sorry," Chandler said.
"I know, I know sweetie...I get it. And Joey….thank for today. I know you were flustered….let's just have a good time."
They all headed into the reception where the party began. Joey watched Chandler and Monica danced together and he had to agree with Monica. They had to stop making those jokes. They had to stop saying either one could do better because watching them, he didn't think either could.
When it was time for speeches, Joey watched as Rachel and Phoebe gave their speeches and quickly wrote out some notes on a piece of paper he had gotten from the hotel lobby. He really had forgotten everything on set. When he got up, he was a little nervous.
"Alright, what can I say about my buddy, Chandler that hasn't already been said. Probably a lot but I probably shouldn't say it, right?," Joey said as he looked at Chandler and Monica sitting together, "I actually met Chandler the day that apparently he covered Rachel's car with peanut butter. He showed up randomly at my Halloween party and even then I remember, he seemed like a good guy. He was my wing man. Years later, when we became roommates, I thought he was gay. Jury is still out...just kidding. Chandler is more than a best friend to me, he's my brother. I never had brothers and he's an only child so when we became roommates, I think our age stunted at like twelve. We had a lot of fun as roommates...probably way too much fun and dude, anytime you wanna come over and watch Baywatch and play video games, you know where to find me. In addition to everything he did for Phoebe, he has also supported my acting career. Done everything...also, a lot of you know Chandler's been through a lot...he's dealt with a lot and he's shown that he's got a hell of a lot of strength. I'm so proud of you, man. You've come a long way and...I'm thrilled to call you family. Also, and I know I forgot a lot of what I had to say today but Monica and Chandler, looking at the two of you….I've never seen either one of you so happy and together, you work and looking at you two, I know this is gonna last forever. You're an unstoppable team and always stronger together. I love you both more than you know. Congratulations."
Chandler walked over to Joey and hugged him. He love this guy, loved Chandler. It didn't matter what he had done, it didn't matter what issues had come up, Chandler was his brother, his best friend.
"Thanks, Joe," Chandler said.
"Anytime, brother," Joey said.
"Chanoey, forever," Chandler said.
"Jandler, asshole."
"It's my wedding, Chanoey," Chandler said.
"Mon," Chandler said.
"Mondler trumps Jandler/Chanoey. Go sit down," Monica said.
Joey laughed as he walked back to his seat as Ross stood up to make his speech. Sitting there watching Monica and Chandler, he felt like they really had always been together. They both truly lifted each other and made each other better. Monica couldn't do better. Chandler calmed her down better than anyone he had ever known. Chandler knew how to ease her worries, protect her and say the things that could bring Monica down from whatever ledge she was on. Richard couldn't do that. Chandler could. Chandler was her better half. Monica protected Chandler as well, they both just were so good at talking each other down. They really were an unbeatable team. They were a true When Harry Met Sally story.
After the speeches, Joey approached Chandler and Ross. He overheard them talking about Gandalf. Joey had seen him walk in and had seen him talking to Chandler, Monica and Ross and then watched as he walked out.
"You kicked him out?" Joey asked.
"I did. I don't need him here," Chandler said.
"How are you doing? Not drinking at your wedding?" Joey asked.
"I'm okay. Today, it's easy."
Joey cocked his head to the side. He wondered if Chandler knew he knew. He wanted answers though. He wanted to know if he called Chandler out, would he tell the truth.
"You took a beer, didn't you? From my fridge?" Joey asked.
"Did you tell him?" Chandler asked, looking at Ross.
"No, I just knew what I had. I had a six pack of beer...one was missing," Joey said.
"Amazing. Alright...I fell off the wagon. But I'm back on," Chandler said.
"Good," Joey said, that anger slowly melting away. The truth. That was all he wanted from Chandler. He admitted he fell off. He admitted his mistake. That would be enough.
"And thank you for the speeches gentlemen, hope to one day return the favor," Chandler said.
"You like being married so far?" Ross asked.
"Yeah, so far so good. I'm planning on this being the last time I do this but you know…" Chandler said.
"Very funny, hey I was talking to Mona over there. She works with Monica. I did not ask her to marry me," Ross smirked.
"Whoa," Joey said.
"He's growing," Chandler said.
"Shut up of both you...why am I friends with you two?" Ross asked.
"Because we keep you from collapsing under the weight of your own ego," Chandler said.
"That's probably true," Ross mused which made both Chandler and Joey laugh, "but hey, at least I know I'll be on marriage number four before Joey here gets to number one."
"Well, duh...yeah," Joey said.
"Now, now Joe. Give yourself some credit. I think you'll be on marriage number one before Ross is on his fifth or sixth marriage," Chandler said.
"I would say probably around my fifth. I'll say fifth," Ross said.
"Thank you," Joey said.
They were still laughing and messing with each other when someone came over to tell Chandler to let him know it was time to cut the cake. Chandler left the two of them to get Monica.
"So, you wanna take a bet?" Joey asked.
"I'm not betting when my next marriage is," Ross said.
"No, not that. Do you think Chandler's gonna smash the cake in Mon's face?" Joey asked.
"Hmmm, interesting. Maybe. Let's check with the girls. They should be in on this," Ross said as the two walked towards Phoebe and Rachel.
"Twenty bucks says he smashes her in the face with the cake," Joey said.
"Oh no...he already knows he's in trouble over what happened earlier. He wouldn't do that. She'd kill him," Phoebe said.
They watched closely as Monica and Chandler cut the cake. Joey let out a laugh as he watched Chandler carefully feed Monica cake as if he were trying to dismantle a bomb or something. He was being so careful not to drop a crumb on her dress, on the floor, anywhere. He was a little disappointed that Chandler had not smashed the cake in Monica's face but he understood.
"Oh, G-d...I know that look," Rachel whispered.
"Me too," Ross said.
Joey looked at them and then back at Monica who was grinning. She raised an eyebrow, ran her tongue over her teeth as she stared directly at Chandler. She picked up a big handful of cake and proceeded to smash it in Chandler's face. Chandler began laughing as the other four cheered. It was yet another reason he loved Monica. You could never count her out. Sure she could be uptight and competitive and wound very tightly but she could play just as well any of the others.
"I can play," Monica said as the two kissed.
Chandler retaliated by picking up a slice and smashing it Monica's face. The others laughed as Monica and Chandler shared cake covered kisses. How could any of them ever doubt them? After the newly married couple went off to dance, Joey grabbed Phoebe's hand. His partner. He knew Phoebe was still pissed.
"So I was thinking," Joey said, as he held Phoebe close to him and the danced slowly together, "Monica was right."
"About what?"
"We should probably stop saying Monica's too good for Chandler or Monica can do better."
"Why? It's true?" Phoebe asked.
"Look at them," Joey said as he motioned towards them, dancing. Chandler was saying something and Monica was laughing. Chandler was beaming as he held Monica and was seemingly trying his best to crack her up and it was working.
"He left. He ran out on the wedding. He vanished...he... you don't get it. I've had so many people leave. Chandler just leaves and comes back and then we all forgive him. I can't do that. He promised me when I first moved in….I don't hate him, I don't….it's hard for me to forgive him."
"I know. He loves you though. His whole reasoning for doing that stand up was to get you to laugh. He didn't care if the rest of us were there, he just wanted you there."
"He….I'm angry. I'm angry at him. I need more time."
"I get it."
Joey kissed Phoebe on the top of the head as he continued holding her. He understood her. He knew Phoebe would not forgive as easily as the rest of them did and while he got it, it still made him a little sad. He wanted Chandler and Phoebe to be friends again. He wanted her to let go.
The next morning, post wedding, they met up with the other four for brunch. Monica had wanted to celebrate post wedding with the rest of them so she had planned a brunch just for them. They sat, drinking coffee, powering their way their way through French toast and waffles and mimosas. Joey felt some sort of tension lingering amongst them but he wasn't sure what it was from. What could be wrong now? They should be happy.
"Can we talk about it now?" Monica asked, letting out a sigh as she looked at Rachel. Joey looked up, very confused.
"About what?" Rachel asked.
"Rach," Monica said.
"But….it's still your weekend. We're still in the midst of the Monica celebrations," Rachel grinned.
"Wait….shouldn't it be the Monica and Chandler celebrations?" Chandler asked.
"No," Monica said.
Chandler let out a laugh and placed his arm around Monica, kissing her. Did something happen with Rachel? What was happening? Did she sleep with Chandler's dad again?
"Monica-" Rachel started.
"No, besides Ross told me this morning," Monica said.
"What? You did?" Rachel asked, looking at him.
"I had to, I'm sorry….I just...I had to say something. I went to their room when you were getting ready this morning," Ross said.
"I wish you hadn't done that," Rachel said.
"I had to say something," Ross said.
"No, you didn't," Rachel said. "It's my decision and I wanted to try and keep it secret until after this weekend."
Joey looked at Ross and Rachel. He looked around the table. Monica had a mimosa, Phoebe, Ross, Joey had one. Chandler had coffee and some orange juice but when his eyes fell on Rachel's plate, he noticed she was not drinking anything. It clicked. Rachel was pregnant?
"Well, I mean...we all kinda knew," Phoebe said. "You confirmed it to me."
"I didn't know. You knocked her up?" Joey asked, looking over at Ross.
"Classy, Joe. I know you knew but...let's-I just- I don't wanna discuss this now," Rachel said, "please, I want to keep this about Chandler and Monica. Although, Chandler why didn't you tell me Sophie passed away."
"I-well-you're pregnant," Chandler offered.
"You're weird," Rachel said.
"I'm sorry I didn't tell you. We'll visit her. I promise," Chandler said.
"Thank you," Rachel said.
"Look, I appreciate you not wanting to tell us or not confirm it right now but we do all kind of know. Let's just discuss it," Monica said.
"Fine….I am pregnant. Ross and I are going to have a child," Rachel said, letting out an annoyed sigh.
"Are you getting married? 'Cause I know how to do that," Joey said, trying to make the situation lighter.
"No, no marriage although, that's only what I want….who knows, Ross may have already gotten us a marriage license in the last twenty four hours," Rachel said.
"Why are you mad?" Ross asked.
"Because it's so typical of you Ross. You never asked if I had told Monica or Chandler or if anyone knew so you went completely over my head and made the decisions without asking me. Yes, I confirmed it to Phoebe but I hadn't confirmed to anyone else," Rachel said, motioning to the rest of the group.
"They were going to find out eventually," Ross said.
"And why couldn't I have been the one to make that choice. I especially didn't want Monica and Chandler knowing right now because this weekend is still supposed to be about them," Rachel said.
"It's okay, Rach. Hey, you're pregnant. At least for the next nine months, I can have a non-drinking buddy," Chandler said.
"I'm going to be an aunt. It can still be about me," Monica said as she reached for Rachel's hand and squeezed it.
"Yeah, yeah and now, when we have our weekly lunches….we can choose all the bad, fattening places to eat. The ones I always recommend and you refuse to go to? Oh, nine months without having to go somewhere that has menu items like kale or…queef-wah?" Chandler sounded confused.
"It's pronounced keen-wah," Rachel corrected him.
"It's gonna be amazing. I can make it about me too. Nine months of bacon cheeseburgers and chili cheese fries," Chandler mused.
"Wait….no," Monica said, giving him a look.
"I'm just gonna help Rachel out," Chandler argued.
"By clogging your arteries and giving yourself a heart attack at thirty two?" Monica asked.
"Well, you know I'm trying to give more to my friends," Chandler said, "it's the thirteenth step."
Monica playfully elbowed him as Rachel laughed. Joey kept trying to comprehend this new development. His roommate was now pregnant? When had she and Ross had sex? He tried to do the math in his head but it gave him a headache.
"Thanks, guys….and Chandler, we cannot have bacon cheeseburgers every week," Rachel said.
"Nachos," Chandler remarked.
"Oooo, tempting," Rachel said. "But can we not….now...I really, I just….you two got married yesterday. You're gonna go on your honeymoon, you're going to Turks and Caicos. I'm jealous. Let's talk about that."
"Okay, we can….just Pheebs, you can't invite yourself on this trip," Chandler teased.
"Bite me," Phoebe retorted.
Chandler leaned in towards Phoebe to playfully bite her shoulder which elicited laughter from the rest of the group. Leave it to Chandler to make things a little lighter again. Phoebe was also trying. It was strangely new. Monica and Chandler were married. Ross and Rachel were having a baby. Everything was changing and he was starting to feel that familiar feeling again. He felt stuck. Completely stuck. Yes, he was happy with his soap but he was thirty three and for the first time he was beginning to wonder what it might be like to have someone of his own? Monica and Chandler had each other, despite whatever drama Ross and Rachel had, they seemed destined for each other and while Phoebe was his partner in crime it seemed like they would never really move past being friends with benefits. So was it time for Joey to think about it? Maybe?
