I'm back everyone, sorry it took me so long to post new chapters, it's crunch time at my school. Anyway more are on the way and as always Review and Comment!

Chapter 43: Shame

Javik's room

Javik was in his room in a foul mood, it was normal for the prothean but today he seemed more agitated than usual. Liara sensed it, which was why she kept her distance until he cooled down which was perfect for him…Javik was not in the mood for her prodding. He read the report from EDI, Shepherd had found Leviathan…and the shocking truth about them. They created the reapers, the same machines that destroyed his cycle and countless others before and instead of destroying them, the human had made an alliance with them. As a soldier he understood the tactic, after all who knew the reapers better than their creators but as the last survivor of a dead race…all he felt was utter disgust. He heard the door open.

"I'm not in the mood for your questions, asari"

"Liara is in her room" Javik looked back and saw Tali.

"Species#112 Quarian" Javik hadn't talk much with the quarian woman, because she was mostly around Shepherd. He could sense her pheromones; she was in a relationship with the Commander. He scoffed, mating between species was a pointless exercise, no offspring would be created between them.

Tali put her hands on her sides. "My name is Tali" she said annoyed.

"What do you want?" Javik asked.

"I know working with Leviathan is hard, Javik but please don't blame Wayne" Tali said. "If there was any other way he wouldn't have taken their help"

"It doesn't matter, they will fight the reapers and that's all that matters" Javik said. He then looked back at Tali and stared hard at her. "I just hope your cycle is ready when those abominations turn their fangs at you"

Tali flinched a little. "What makes you so sure they'll turn on us?"

"Anything powerful enough to create the reapers will not stay quiet for long…"

Shepherd looked around, the fight had gotten more desperate, and the reapers were gaining ground while everyone was dying like dogs. "Hold the line! Don't let them through!" Shepherd said firing his gun. There he was again in front of wreck of the Normandy, with his ground team, the husks ambushed them.

The team was decimated; Kaiden, Liara, James, Kasumi, Jacob and Garrus had died; Miranda was dying choking on her own blood, trying to reach for Jacob's hand, only to die just short of his hand. EDI's ruined body laid to the side, impaled by the debris, and the screams of Javik and Kolyat filled the air as the husks and Cannibal fed on their flesh while they were still alive. Once again Shepherd and Tali were the only ones left.

"Wayne, Look!" Shepherd's eyes went wide as Harbinger landed; its core started to glow, and it was aiming at Tali. Shepherd tried to run to her, but as hard as he tried, Tali went farther and farther away from him.

Harbinger fired and Tali's scream filled the air, Shepherd rushed to Tali's side, she was bleeding everywhere, her suit was shredded and face plate was broken, she was dying. "Tali, Tali please don't do this to me "he said tears. "Please, don't leave me"

"Wayne, I love…" Her eyes closed as she went limp in Shepherd's arms.

"YOU HAVE FAILED, SHEPHERD"

"No…" he said cradling Tali's dead body.

"THEY ALL LOOKED UP TO YOU, SHE LOVED YOU, AND YOU FAILED THEM!"

"No!" The sky grew a deep blood-red, as the screams of the innocents filled the night air. They fled trying to escape the carnage, but they disappeared and husks replaced them. Tali's dead body dissolved into blue cybernetics, her once beautiful white eyes were replaced by the soulless blue eyes of a husk. Tali grasped his throat tightly as the rest of her helmet shattered to reveal her face twisted and deformed by reaper tech.

Harbinger's voice echoed as the reaper's one red-eye gazed at him. "YOU HAVE FAILED THEM ALL, YOU DESERVE TO SUFFER!"

"NO!" The reapers descended from the sky. Husk-Tali raised her now clawed arm into the air…it would be the last thing he would ever see…..

Shepherd's cabin

"NO!" Shepherd said as he shot up. He was back in his room, his breathing was heavy, and he was covered in sweat. He looked to his left only to see Tali not there. He panicked. "EDI, Where is Tali?"

"Tali'Zorah is in Engineering at this time" the AI said. "Should I get her?"

"N-no, that's fine, thank you…" Shepherd sighed and climbed out of bed, holding his head. The same dream, always the same damn dream. He felt tired, more than he's ever been…and just wanted peace for once but it would never happen until the reapers are dead. But how long could he keep this up? There's only so much fight in a person. Only so much death one could take before...

"Shepherd, are you okay? Your biometrics have spiked significantly" EDI said.

"Don't worry about me, I'm fine"

"Very well, Shepherd" she said not really convinced. "Admiral Hackett has called; he wishes to see you on the Leviathan incident"

"Okay, tell him I'm on my way"

War Room

Shepherd went to the comm room to speak with Hackett. He pressed the button. "Commander, I've read your report, hell of a thing you did" Hackett said. "To think we got the reapers' creators on our side…" Shepherd could only scoff; it wasn't like Leviathan was fighting with them out of convenience, once they dealt with the reapers all bets were off as far as their alliance. The question wasn't if they would attack, it was a matter of when…

"Our scientists are getting a kick out of the data you and Dr. Bryson had forwarded; in fact they're calling it the Leviathan Codex"

"They're saying it rewrites galactic history as we know it" Hackett said. "We know their beginning and hopefully we'll provide them with an end, we're move the artifacts to heavy reaper fronts hoping the Leviathans can do some damage"

Shepherd nodded. "Amen to that, just make sure you tell them to be careful, those things are a double edge sword"

"Noted" Just as Shepherd walked away, Hackett spoke up. "Before you go, the Admirals came to an agreement; you are to meet them outside the Perseus Veil"

Shepherd looked back and frowned, they couldn't be that stupid to start a war with the geth while the reapers were out there. In fact, they were supposed to be colonizing a new planet, and Rael was supposed to lead the talks. It was the condition for keeping what happened on the Alarei a secret. Shepherd rubbed his forehead; he solved one problem and had two more rear its ugly head. "We don't need this…"

"So what are you going to do?"

Shepherd looked at him. "What do you mean?"

"The conflict with Quarians and the geth is deep, very deep" he said. "I just hope you got your priorities straight"

Shepherd frowned. "What that's supposed to mean?"

"This is war, Shepherd, and sometimes you are forced to make sadistic choices" Hackett said. "Don't let your feelings for Tali'Zorah cloud your judgment"

"Are you saying I should choose between the Quarians or the geth!? Let one live, while the other die!?" Shepherd asked angrily.

"I would love to have the Quarians and the geth to work together, but it may come to that" Hackett said staying calm.

"No, I won't be responsible for a genocide, I'll find a way" Shepherd said defiantly.

"I hope so, for your sake and sanity" Hackett said. "Hackett out" His image faded.

The Normandy went out of Mass relay in the Dholen, the last time the Normandy crew was in this system was to rescue Tali from Haestrom. Now they were in this system to save the quarians from themselves. "Quarian Envoy Ship ahead, Commander" Joker said.

"Tell them they got permission to board, and direct them to the War Room"

"Aye-Aye" Shepherd was in the War room with Tali waiting with him, the Quarian had been a bundle of energy when she found out she was finally going to see her people again. Shepherd couldn't blame her, after all the fleet was unaffected by the reapers at this point, but he was worried on how she would feel when she found out they were at war with geth. His lover has been through enough troubles with her missions with him, sometimes the spectre wondered if it was a great idea for her to stay with him.

"Relax, rookie, they'll get here" Shepherd said amused.

"Sorry, Wayne, I'm just glad, they're okay" Tali said. The door opened and the Admirals entered one by one. Koris and Gerrel were deadly serious; Xen was her usual aloof self, Rann was happy to see her niece was okay. "Makacil!" The two Quarians embraced tightly, causing the spectre to smile; at least someone was worried about her just as much as was worried about them.

"Tali! I'm so glad you're okay!" Rann said. The Admiral looked at Shepherd gratefully. "Commander, you have my thanks for protecting Tali" The last one to come in was Rael, Tali's father, from the look on his face he was happy to see his daughter, the spectre could tell he wanted to give her a hug but relented and stayed in the back. Instead he gazed at Shepherd.

"You my thanks also, Shepherd" Rael said. Shepherd nodded curtly at Rael, he still hasn't forgiven him for Tali's trial, but he would bite his tongue for his girlfriend's sake. Plus he wanted to know why they were picking a fight with the geth, especially when the war needed them both.

Gerrel then spoke up. "Though I find it strange she's here when she should be with the fleet fighting with us" Rann and Rael glared at him. Shepherd frowned also, Gerrel was definitely not the man he met a year ago at Tali's trial…he was a lot more bloodthirsty, according to Hackett that was to be expected as he has cause trouble for the Turians before the war started. Shepherd would be keeping his eyes on him.

"That's not her fault, she was with me on Earth, we weren't allowed to communicate outside, and the room I was in blocked long range messages" Shepherd said.

"Besides does it matter? We already lost so many because of this damned war "Koris said.

Tali looked at him. "The Reapers attacked you?"

Koris glared at Rael. "No, we're fighting the geth?"

Tali eyes went wide. "You're fighting the geth, when we should be fighting the reaper?"

"Ask your father" Tali looked at her father.

Rael looked away from his daughter. "I declared war on the geth, Tali"

"I see" Tali said. Her tone of voice was not sad or angry, it was emotionless, and as in she expected this from him, as if she didn't care. Shepherd saw Rael flinch at her tone, it had hurt him. Shepherd crossed his arms, trying to keep his face neutral although he was trying his hardest not to cuss him out right then and there.

"I thought the Quarians were forbidden from provoking the geth, because of a treaty"

Xen scoffed. "A treaty is nothing, compared to getting back our home world and advanced AI technology" That response didn't surprise Tali, Xen would sell her own mother into slavery if it meant getting her hands on the geth. Another one to watch for…

"And you would doom us all, by repeating our ancestors mistakes, the geth are our children, we shouldn't be fighting them" Koris said. "Is it any wonder they joined the reapers?"

Shepherd looked at Koris, this was new info…though it would explain why the Fleet was so willing to talk to the Alliance despite being so isolationist. "Hold up, did you say reapers?"

"Yes, when we fought them, we had an edge due to there being fewer geth, but then something happened, the geth's tactics changed" Rael said. He then pulled up data in a hologram of a blue sphere, that was the geth consensus and then it turned red. Rael explained this new data made the geth more aggressive much more than usual. "Self-preservation wasn't a factor anymore"

"Keelah…reaper code…" Tali gasped. "And the fleets?"

"Pinned in the home system, if we're going to win-"

"Win? You insisted on using the civilian ships, Gerrel! No this time we retreat, our people's survival are on those ships" Koris said.

"And give the geth time to regroup?" Xen asked.

"Koris is right, you need to get your people out of there" Shepherd said. "Where is the reaper code signal coming from?" Rael pulled up a hologram of a large ship.

"This dreadnought here, it's heavily defended, and it can out gun anything we have"

"The Normandy's stealth drive can easily slip past, we can send in a small team and disable it" Shepherd said. "Confusing the geth, and letting you get away through the relay"

"Good, our civilians have seen too much fighting, can you disable it?" Koris asked.

Shepherd smirked. "I got the best reaper expert beside me, we can do it" he said. "We'll ready a team to hit that dreadnought" Tali walked away to get ready for the mission, she brushed by her father without so much of a hello. Rael followed and grabbed her arm.

"Tali…"

Tali pulled her arm away and glared at her father. "So the Alarei wasn't enough, you had to declared war on the geth?" Tali asked.

"I didn't have a choice…."

"There's always a choice!" Tali said angrily.

"I was blackmailed…Xen has the evidence" Rael said. "She was going to out me and your relationship with Shepherd, I had to protect us…"

"At the cost of our people…" Tali said. "In the end, it comes back to you and the Alarei"

"I'm sorry, Tali I tried, I really did, and I never wanted to put this burden on you" he said. "I just wanted what was best for you"

Tears streamed from her face, he was sorry…now while their people were dying. She shook her head, it was far too late for apologies. "I never wanted this…I would be happier with just a father" she choked. "Someone, to say that they were proud of you, when you did something good, to console you when you have doubts" Rael lowered his head.

"Or to comfort you, when you lost your mother, and miss her…" Tali said sadly. "But no, I have you, a war criminal as a father, and I've never been more ashamed to be your daughter…." She walked away.

"I know Tali, you're not the only one ashamed of me….I am ashamed of me…." Rael said sadly. He went to join the other Admirals.