Disclaimer: I don't own Bones..atleast I'm pretty sure I don't.

Eowyngoldberry: I'm so sorry but I need her more yet. Eventually, well okay not in this story but eventually.
Jrfanfrommo: Sorry can't tell you that ;-) You'll have to read this one and then wait for the sequel.
Cremant: I got tired of putting Sequel to, sequel to..blah blah so I'm calling the set of stories starting with Lockdown at the lab, the snake bite series (she got bit by a snake o.O).
The sequel will have a Hodgins worthy conspiracy, however no Broadsky, just didn't like him bleh.
Chkgn93: Given Brennan's evolution it is a very good probability ;-).


Chapter 49: Let's Play Army

Kabul: July 30th

Booth woke up to the smell of coffee and the sound of quiet voices in his room. Opening his eyes, he looked around. His room was packed with people and he winced as pain shot up the back of his head. He looked toward the door knowing Brennan was standing there. When Brennan saw him wince, she took a step backwards into the hall.

She gestured for a nurse and moments later, a nurse came bearing a small cup with pain medication. The nurse took his vitals then handed him a small cup with a pill in it. Booth took the pill, as the squints continued talking with his unit. Weaving in and out of people Brennan made her way to his bedside.

"If you want a shower today you are going to have to walk there," she teased him with a smile. He rolled his eyes but grinned at her.

"Yeah Sarge, you need to wash your smelly self," Davis teased him.

"Have you been sniffing me while I've been sleeping private?" Booth asked with a smirk. Davis started blustering and everyone started laughing.

"Just let me know when you want to go to the showers," Brennan said softly.

"And you're going with me why?" Booth asked wiggling his eyebrows.

"You will still need help with your hair," she said with a chuckle "however if you prefer Parks can go with you. As I remember he has a fascination with your underwear." Both Parks and Booth blushed as the unit laughed at the two of them.

"Or even Dr. Saroyan can help you since she has already seen you naked," Brennan offered with a smirk as his face turned a darker shade of red.

"Oh, this is too good. Am I next Bren? I can help because I am a friend and I am already married," Angela, grinned out. Cam was trying not to laugh as she held her hand in front of her mouth. Sweets sighed as he pinched the bridge of his nose.

"Agent Booth, I would suggest that you swallow your pride and accept her help. I don't want to end up on the list of people who can help you shower," Sweet said in a pleading tone.

"Alright, alright, Bones enough. I am so glad you can have fun at my expense," Booth growled.

"We will have a discussion about sarcasm and fun later Booth," she told him with a knowing glance. He groaned and glared at Angela.

"Why are you glaring at Angela, Sarge? She didn't do anything," Oaks said coming to Angela's defense.

"Isn't that sweet, Ange? He thinks you're innocent, he doesn't think that you explained Booth having fun by being sarcastic with Dr. B all those years," Hodgins said with a smirk. He knew she had been the one to explain Booth's sarcastic comments more often than not were making fun of her. Angela smacked his arm with a glare.

"So, what's it going to be big guy?" Cam smirked at him still trying not to laugh.

"Sarge is going to lose either way," Brown said trying not to laugh.

"No, the choice is his. I will not be upset if he chooses Dr. Saroyan, they have been friends longer than I have known him. I am sure that she does not care if he picks me either," Brennan said logically, as she weaved her way across the room to the door.

"I'll go get your clothes Booth," she called over her shoulder. Everyone turned to stare at him and he just shrugged with a grin. Booth heard Brennan's computer beep and Angela picked it up. Opening the teleconference Max appeared on the screen.

"Angela, where's Tempe? Is she okay? What happened? Do I need to come out there?"

"Max, slow down. She is fine. Booth was shot. She is down the hall getting Booth some clothes," Angela said trying to calm Max down.

"Booth are you and my sister naked in her bed again?" Russ growled at Booth. The unit started snickering.

"Russ, I am not naked and neither is she. I am lying in a hospital bed with 15 other people in my room," Booth sighed in frustration.

"Russ, shut up before you run him off in annoyance," Max chided. Angela set the computer in front of Booth and walked away.

"Max you know it would take more than that to get rid of me. Like maybe death," Booth said in a quiet tone.

"Looks like you have already tried. What did you get hit by a tank?" Max said while nodding at Booth's statement.

"Naah got shot," Booth said. Max stopped for a second then his eyes went wide.

"Do you need me to talk to ahh the private that pushed you?" Booth's eyes snapped to the screen and widened, Max nodded his head.

"No Max, thank you it will be taken care of," Booth said.

"Okay, well tell Tempe I'll check in on her later," Max said with a smile. Booth nodded and reached over stiffly to close the program.

"He-" Booth put his hand up and interrupted Hodgins as he was about to speak. He looked up to his unit to see if any of them had caught what Max had said. Goodman's eyes lit up with understanding and Booth held up one finger. One by one, they all figured it out leaving just Parks puzzling at what Booth was doing.

"Parks, no one said who got Sarge shot but Max knew it was a private. Indicating that he knows exactly who pushed him," Goodman finally said rolling his eyes.

"How the heck did he know?" Parks asked in wonder at the man's knowledge.

"One never asks where an ex-con gets his information," Booth said.

"That is just scary," Parks mumbled.

"You have no idea how scary that man can be," Booth said with a smirk.

Brennan walked in the door and dropped her bag, the entire unit turned to stare at her.

"Booth, why is your unit staring at me?"

"Max said he will check in on you later," Booth said trying to hide a smile. She nodded a confused look still on her face. There was a knock on the door and everyone turned to look.

"You, Ms. Burley, are like a bad rash. No one wants you and you keep showing up anyway," Sweets muttered. Angela tried not to laugh at Sweets and pretended to scratch her nose to cover her smile.

"What do you want Ms Burley?" Brennan asked in a calm tone her eyes snapping in anger.

"I actually came to speak with Sgt. Major Booth about his shooting if he will talk to me," she said politely.

"I have no wish to speak with you Ms. Burley," Booth glowered.

"It will only take a moment I promise," she said sweetly.

"If you will excuse me I was about to go take a shower," Booth growled.

Brennan came to stand next to his bed as he swung his legs around the edge. Bending over she scooped up the duffel and slung it over her shoulder. She stood on one side and Parks took the other. Booth put his feet on the floor and pushed off the bed. He swayed for a moment his legs feeling weak. Straightening his back in determination, he took one-step then another.

Without thinking about it, Booth tried to lengthen his stride to its normal length. Four hands reached out when he began to wobble. Putting his hands up, Booth paused, causing Brennan and Parks to take a step back. Following Booth slowly, they made their way down the hall to the larger shower. Stopping inside the showers, Parks looked at them.

"You got it from here?"

"Yeah, we got it," Booth told him.

Brennan left him to stand while she dropped the duffel outside the shower door. Booth made his way over towards the showerheads and stopped trying to figure out how to undress. Brennan motioned for him to sit on the edge of the massage chair. He sat on the chair and she gently removed his brace, supported his head with one hand, and pulled his shirt up with the other. Switching between hands, she was able to pull the shirt over his head. Booth grimaced at the twinge in his neck when she let his neck go for a second.

"Are you okay Booth? We can do this later if you are in pain," she asked quietly looking at him with concern.

"Just a twinge I'm okay," he told her.

After putting the brace back on his neck, she stepped back allowing him to do the rest by himself. Booth pulled his shorts and boxers down to his knees, then bending over he pulled them all the way off. He stood up, walked to the showerheads with her trailing two steps behind him. Once he had the shower running and was standing under it, Brennan went back to his duffel. Pulling out his body wash and shampoo, Brennan carried it into the shower for him.

Setting it on the ledge she walked back towards the chair and began dragging it over towards him. When it was close, enough to be on hand but far enough to be out of his way she went back to his duffel. She dug out clean clothes, a towel and set them on the bench.

"Bones?"

"I'll be right there Booth," she called back picking up the towel. She walked in and he was leaning on his arms against the wall. Walking swiftly she set the towel to the side and dragged the chair under the water. He sat on the chair and she took off his neck brace. Holding his neck, she washed his hair and he stared up and grinned.

"What do you find so amusing Booth?"

"Nothing just enjoying the view," he said as he eyed her breasts, which were right over his face. She looked down and rolled her eyes.

"Okay, sit up and while I hold your neck I want you to turn around and sit in the chair properly," she instructed. Doing as Brennan had asked, Booth settled his head into the headrest. He groaned out loud when her hands gently began to massage his neck, which had become stiff at being held immobile.

"Magic fingers Bones," Booth mumbled. She continued with his neck gently and pushed down a little harder as she moved down his back and across his shoulders.

"I'm going to be a big ball of goo and you'll have to carry me back," Booth mumbled. Laughing in a low tone Brennan massaged back up his neck. He felt her brushing her fingers across the stubble of hair that grew in across the shaved area from his surgery.

"What are you doing now?"

"Checking your stitches," she replied.

She walked away, picked up his towel, and dried his hair carefully. Then his neck and back, putting one hand behind his neck and another on his chest she helped him sit up. Gently holding his neck, she allowed him to shave. Using a cup, she rinsed his face then handed him the towel. He briskly dried his chest and shoulders off then dropped the towel in his lap.

Reaching over she grabbed the brace and put it back on him. Leaving him to his own devices Brennan returned his showering supplies to the duffel bag. She turned around and almost ran into him as he was standing directly behind her with a towel wrapped around his waist.

"Booth," she scolded him. He just grinned at her and pulled her against him. She wrapped her arms around his waist and lightly squeezed.

"You need to get dressed before someone else comes in here," she said.

"Yeah, I guess I do. Don't I?" He said with a chuckle. She handed him a pair of boxers she had bought him. He read the leg of the boxers and burst out laughing.

The boxer shorts he held in his hands read; Let's play Army, I'll lie down and you can blow the hell out of me.

"Bones...where...did...you...get...these...?" He was laughing so hard he could only get out one word at a time.

"Internet, I found a website that sold boxers and they had a deal where you get 20 pairs for 25.00. So I just ordered a box and had them sent over-night delivery," she said. He bent over carefully and put them on. Brennan carefully watched as he put on his shorts.

"Those are too funny," he said.

She shrugged and stepped to the side to let him get dressed staying out of the way until he needed help. Watching him struggle with his shirt, she waited. If he needed help he would ask for it. She smiled as she watched him hold his own neck with one hand and pulled his shirt on with the other. He managed to do it and she was impressed with his ingenuity. He turned to look at her and saw her eyes glowing.

"What?"

"For someone who had major surgery three days ago you are coping very well," she said with a hint of pride in her voice. Grinning at her, Booth shot a wink in her direction.

"I want to get better because I have things I want to do," he teased her wiggling his eyebrows.

"Yes well, it will be a while before that happens. I didn't put your skull back together to have it broken again on a headboard," she muttered. He just laughed again and picked through the bag. When he pulled out a pair of orange and black socks, he smiled.

"Where did you find striped socks with grips on the bottom?" Booth asked Brennan as he pulled the socks on his feet.

"I am a resourceful person," she said with a smile.

"That you are," he agreed. They slowly made their way back to his room. Everyone was still sitting in the room glowering at Hannah. Booth walked to the bed and sat down carefully. Brennan watched as he swung his legs up onto the bed. Cam saw his socks and started chuckling.

"At least she got the right colors," she told him with a grin. Cocking his head, Booth shot a grin at Cam.

"She has a very steep learning curve. You should have seen the boxers she got me," he said starting to laugh again. The unit all turned to look at her and she just grinned.

"Oh no, I have to know about these," Angela said walking over to Booth.

Angela leaned over near him, taking the hint, Booth whispered in her ear. She stood up and squealed in laughter. Covering her mouth, she started laughing. Brennan just rolled her eyes and grinned. Angela walked to Hodgins whispered in his ear; he then turned and between laughs, whispered in Cam's ear. Cam turned to Sweets, who turned red but turned to Parks. Hannah watched as one by one they whispered and ignored her.

Soon the whole room was laughing at something that Hannah had not been told.


A/N Okay so yeah a short transitional chapter of sorts (unless of course you enjoy picturing DB nekkid). Yes, you can have those boxers if you want them, check out Cafe Press (they have awesome tee shirts as well). No I'm not getting paid for that, I just really like their stuff lol. Okay tomorrow...lets see...fun tee shirts, annoying Hannah, more pie ( I like pie so yeah I stick it in where ever I can), marriage discussion, discharge papers, more marriage discussion, and Casablanca.

Still looking for a beta reader for a new story I'm working on. You don't have to follow the rules FFN uses for beta readers ;-) I generally need help for clearing up confusion and plot holes. Just PM if ur interested (no it's not the sequel =P).

Reviews are awesome, I read everyone of them! So feel free to let me know what you think.