SM owns Twilight, I just mess with her characters. Thanks for reading, reviewing and subscribing. I love having company on this journey!

*Hankie alert*

Chapter 44 - The Parting Glass (Shaun Davey)

As it turned out, the kids never did get their big party. Instead we hosted a wake and funeral for my dad. It was one of those things that was horrible and yet such a relief. He wasn't in there any more, plain and simple - there had been no one home for a while. His heart condition was the eventual cause of death, but Alzheimer's Disease had stolen Charlie's life three months earlier.

By the time he took his last breath, my dad was almost unrecognizable laying in his bed. It seemed so cold, so harsh, so ... utterly terrible to be relieved. And yet I was. Not because my dad was gone, but because he was no longer trapped here inside his shriveled body, wasting away.

All his life he'd been larger-than-life; big personality, big hobbies, big job, tons of friends and big faith and family man - it seemed like such a cruel end to have him wither away while stuck inside his own mind. He was such a good and decent man, and now he was free from the wretched disease and weakness of this body.

Did I want him dead? No. Did I want him here suffering ... hell no. But it was never up to me.

It was all so sad. Our children would grow up never knowing him. Emily, at nearly four years old, was so young she'd likely forget most things about him but Seth, who would soon be five, would hopefully keep some memories of magical days spent with his fishing buddy and Charlie cheering at all Seth's t-ball games. Perhaps he'd remember watching the Cubs and our Sundays together, too. Charlie loved them like his own grand kids and I'd be forever grateful he got to know them, even if it was only for a season.

Our future babies would only know stories and photos. They'd never be bounced on his knee, or have The Tickle Bug creep upon them making them giggle, or know the silly song about giving babies away with half a ton of clay where he'd toss them in the air and make them squeal. Oh how I loved that game, he'd swing me so high and fast I swore my feet would fly right off my legs. I'd beg over and over for him to do it again, and he loved me so much he did it, even though he was tired and I wasn't a baby any more.

There'd be no more 'Atta Girl' moments or being called Pal-ee Girl, no more calling me "grabby britches" while drinking terrible paisano wine and listening to Irish tunes while playing rummy. No more mornings with him dragging me out of bed long before the sun to drive his boat while he reeled in salmon, enduring the stinky exhaust fumes, or the naps on the bow that inevitably followed when I got nauseous from the stink of the fish and exhaust combined with the big waves rolling us around while we idled on the water. No more poker nights with him and his firemen buddies or big camp outs with his group of friends and their families. No more silly debates about Cubs versus Sox.

I did smile when I thought about all we'd done during the summer, the adventures we had after learning of his illness - all the lasts we'd snuck in under the wire. I'd be forever grateful to my new family for surrounding us with love and helping us make those events happen. From Edward whisking him off to the hospital where we learned of his illness to Esme and Carlisle helping us adapt our lifestyles, and my friends dropping so many of their own issues to help with mine - Emmett taking the helm at Eclectic; Rose relocating and rescuing Eclectic's image amidst total chaos; Alice's switch to headquarters and picking up my slack in leading the company in the creative sector; Edward deciphering and resuscitating our legal mess; Leia's insight, loyalty and excellent work ethic; and Sue's invaluable assistance not only with caring for Charlie but also our kids. Both Sue and Leia had become wonderful friends to me, too. I'd truly be sunk without them, not to mention without each of them, I'd not have been able to savor my dad's precious few remaining waking months.

And again, they carried me through the difficulty ... my mind retreated behind tears and so much sadness, sometimes simply breathing seemed a crushing burden. So my family, both the Cullens and my friends who were like siblings to me, carried me through and helped manage the details.

Charlie was so young and the disease worked so quickly many of his friends were unaware of his health's demise. There were a lot of calls to be made, arrangements for wake and funeral, funeral home - there were lots of details I'd not considered. Thank God for Esme and Sue. They made so many calls for me - I just couldn't tell people he died, much less say it over and over again. I couldn't hear their platitudes, no matter how heart-felt they may be. I couldn't do it! So they called his friends for me and Rosalie wrote a beautiful obituary that ran in all the newspapers. Charlie knew a lot of people, I didn't want anyone to be left unaware.

Alice and Edward held my hand as we picked flowers and arrange a funeral home. Sue called a fireman who does pig roasts and arranged food for the wake. We all agreed the lake house would be the ideal location for that as it could accommodate a lot of people and yet it was intimate. She made sure it was prepped and ready for the crowd, handling all aspects of it, including catering of other foods, thank God. I couldn't do it!

Edward, Esme and I planned his funeral Mass. I had no idea there were so many variations or that the family could choose nearly every aspect of it. We had to pick all the readings and songs from their lists; it was so hard to do ... but somehow we picked them. I had no recollection of which ones we chose or any of the details. I'm fairly certain Esme led those decisions because I couldn't do it!

Edward arranged for a piper to play at Charlie's funeral as well as his burial site. It was something I wish I'd thought of, something I knew my dad would love. I was so grateful that Edward had even those short few months to get to know Charlie because it meant the world to me that Charlie approved of Edward but also Edward understood Charlie, and somehow knew he'd appreciate the piper.

I was surprised, but not really, when The Knights of Columbus approached us about an honor guard procession at his funeral. I knew Charlie was a knight, but I'd also forgotten since he wasn't participating in their functions since he got sick again. I was grateful that they'd asked and that they'd help spread the word about the arrangements. They were so kind and offered their help, but thankfully I had help.

Seemingly the whole community reached out to help me, well nearly the whole community. There was never any word from Renee.

He died on a Sunday, the day after the Halloween Ball. Sue called us early that morning urging us to get home. She said it would happen soon, that his heart rate was weakening. Leia took the kids to her place for us after we had a chat about Grandpa Charlie getting ready for his trip to Heaven. They had known for a while that he was sick and would not get better, but that didn't mean they understood it. They each gave him one last kiss before they went with Leia for ice cream and a sleepover.

The day was so bittersweet. I prayed by his side, not only for his soul but I also prayed the Rosary. Charlie had prayed it daily nearly his whole life, so I had continued that with him since he took to his bed. Today Edward, Esme, Carlisle and Sue joined Charlie and me. We were all sitting around his bed while we prayed. It was such a beautiful and sad occasion. I think it brought us each a measure of comfort as we prayed together.

Afterward, we sat and told stories. I had the most to tell, having known him longest, of course, but Esme and Carlisle shared a few whoppers I'd never heard. Had I known about the time Carlisle busted him for spitting beer onto a flaming burger on the grill I might not have allowed him to man the grill again! No wonder Carlisle always insisted upon doing the grilling! Ew.

I had them in stitches telling about the time he "shot Freddy Kruger" when he and a few of his buddies took their families camping in Colorado. We were literally in the middle of nowhere and he crawled out of our tent for a midnight potty break when he fired off live rounds from his pistol shouting out, "Take THAT Freddy Kruger!" He nearly made me wet the bed, he scared me so badly.

Emmett, Rose, Alice and Jasper joined us a little later, and shared a few more stories. Emmett talked of how scared he was when he met Charlie and how intimidating he was at first.

Alice had a sweet relationship with Charlie. I think he knew she always wanted a father so he treated her like another daughter. He treated all my friends like family. I think it's because he'd always wanted a big family and missed that opportunity. That, and his massive heart made him collect daughters. He'd have done anything for his girls.

Edward brought in his guitar and strummed a little while we sang a few of Charlie's favorite songs as well as a few of our own. We simply hung out together, around my dad, all afternoon.

When he drew his last breath, Charles Joseph Swan was surrounded by people whom he loved and who loved him. There wasn't a dry eye in the room as we watched the pulse in his neck slow then stop. The hospice nurse declared his time of death at 3:18 p.m. October 23, 2011.

I thought it would be creepy to be with someone who died, but it wasn't. It was peaceful and somewhat beautiful - especially when you consider he was there when I was born, and he was there for me every day of my life, and I'd miss him every day after.

"I'm so sorry for your loss." I heard these words over and over and over again through the wake and funeral. What could I say to that? Of course I said "Thank you" but I wanted to do was bawl my eyes out and curl up in a fetal position, crying out "Me too!"

Edward was my rock in the days that followed. He took such amazing care of me. He made sure I ate at regular intervals and took my vitamins, rubbed my back and feet, and the one time I did get sick, he held my hair back for me. Sunday he held me all afternoon and evening while I bawled my eyes out. He just held me and let me vent my grief while I soaked his poor shirt. He cried, too. My dad was a very good man and the world was worse off without him in it.

Leia returned the kids the next morning and, we all spent some time together watching my videos of Charlie and me from before we all knew each other. The kids delighted at seeing me as a little girl with pigtails and a big grin as I waved to the camera before jumping off the side of his old boat, "Da Boata," which he named for the way I'd mispronounced 'boat' as a toddler. They asked a million question as we sat together at the lake house going through old photos as well. They hadn't been there yet, I couldn't believe we'd been married months already and the kids hadn't been to my house ... er ... our other house.

Truth be told, I found it very comforting sitting with my new family in my old favorite spot - the bonus room out back that overlooks the lake. We built a fire in the wood stove and sipped some hot cider as I shared my life from before with them.

"It boggles my mind when I think about how much my life has changed in the seven months I've loved you guys," I said getting misty-eyed ... again. "Even with my dad being sick and leaving us, my life is so much better with all of you in it!"

I pulled the kids into a hug and Edward smashed them between us as we did an awkward group-hug pileup on the couch. They giggled and tickled him, which turned into an all-out tickle war. A feeling of complete awe and gratitude washed over me - I wasn't alone any more. Had Edward not moved home, I'd have dealt with all of this on my own. I'd have been alone and felt so unloved. Instead I had a wonderful husband, two great kids and a baby on the way! I said a silent prayer of thanksgiving, for all my blessings, including having had such a great dad. God called him home but He shared my dad with me for 28 wonderful years first. I would try very hard to celebrate Charlie's life as I mourned my loss.

The turnout for Charlie's wake was enormous - even more so than I expected. His firehouse sent an honor guard to salute him, a gesture that had me bawling into Edward's shirt again. My dad had loved being a fireman/paramedic - the challenge of the job, the camaraderie, the food ... he loved everything about it, except perhaps the late-night calls. So having those men take time out to honor him and to pay their last respects touched me very deeply.

The Knights of Columbus rolled out the proverbial red carpet for us as well. It seemed like everyone was there offering me any help I could ever want or need. I think if I'd asked one of their ladies to be a surrogate they might've done it! They take their obligations to members' families very seriously. It turns out the fireman Sue got to do the pig roast was also a Knight, and the Knights would be manning the grill-spit as they roasted a massive pig for us the following day. This was in addition to the honor guard they would provide for his funeral procession.

Emily, Seth, Alice, Rose, Sue and Esme had helped me prepare photo boards full of snapshots from my dad's life. They were full of big smiles during his life's adventures and milestones. Edward insisted we blow up a few of them to frame for our home as well. His favorites were the ones with Charlie and me - him holding me as a baby, him helping me reel in a big fish, Charlie so proud his buttons might pop at my Air Force basic training graduation in San Antonio, us walking together down the aisle at our wedding ... these were just a few that Edward insisted would have place of pride in our new home. They were present on the board at the funeral home as well as my dad's childhood photos and lots more. I loved the one of him the day I surprised him with his Camaro, I swear his smile was so bright that day you could see it from the moon! Edward liked the one of Dad and me on our motorcycles, visors up and wearing our leathers, we looked so cool! I remember that day well - we rode up to Lake Geneva and cruised around the countryside. It was so much fun.

People loved my pictures and even shared copies of their own! I loved seeing the ones the firemen brought of Charlie helping me work on the lake house. We were so dirty in all of them, but we were so pleased with each new accomplishment! We both put a lot of blood sweat and tears into that place! The firemen who helped said I was their best apprentice, they'd watched me grow up so they were like uncles to me, it was great fun to spend that time with them even though we'd been working. It was great to see pictures from that time, not only of us doing the labor but the meals and drinks (and often card games) that followed.

I loved hearing their stories about him as one-by-one people came up to pay their last respects to Charlie. We laughed and cried together. It was hard and yet it helped so much. I would not be the only person who missed Charlie Swan.

A curious thing happened the morning of the funeral - even though it was late October in Chicagoland it was PERFECT sailing weather.

When Edward saw me smile as we walked toward the church he gave me a questioning look.

"Charlie got perfect sailing weather," I gestured up. "It's warm, the sun is shining in the clear blue sky, and the wind is steady and strong!" It was nearly unheard of for that time of year. "It feels like a sign from Charlie ... I know it's silly, but it feels like he's telling me that he's got smooth sailing wherever he is now."

Edward smiled at me as I delighted in it. Sometimes you have to take all the little comforts where you find them!

"I forgot that you never sailed with Charlie," I said to him. "That's a shame. He taught me everything I know about it. We spent a lot of time sailing when I was a teen. We always had a great time out on the water."

He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me to him, "I'm so glad you got to do that with him, Bella. I hope I'm half the dad Charlie was to you."

I smiled at him, "You're a great daddy, Edward, and you'll be a great dad to this one, too," I said patting my still-flat lower abdomen.

The was a gasp behind us. Esme had overheard us! I winked at her and lifted my finger to my lip as if to say "shh, keep it to yourself!" She gave a little squeal then fixed her expression.

We both chuckled a little, "Uh, Baby, I hate to tell you but I think the cat's outta' the bag," Edward whisper-yelled to me, making me laugh.

"Well it's nice to have something to look forward to, in the middle of all of this," I said. "It's a reminder that life goes on for the rest of us, as it should."

Edward kissed my cheek and held the door open for me as I took a deep breath and squared my shoulders before walking in.

We decided the kids should be able to say their own goodbyes so they'd be attending the funeral, burial and luncheon. Sue planned to help us tend to them - they're well-behaved but I couldn't leave to take Emily to the potty, for example.

At the front of the church, after they closed Charlie's casket, Emily pointed at said casket and said, somewhat loudly though with awe, "Wook Daddy! A PIWATE'S TWEASUWE!" We all chuckled and I was fairly certain Charlie heard and loved that comment, too. Looking at it through a child's eyes, I could see what she meant. It was pretty, for what it was, made with a beautiful oak finish, shaped kinda' like a pirate's treasure chest! I hadn't noticed that when I selected that one, but that made me feel like I picked the right one. He certainly was a treasure...

By the time we'd laid him to rest in the cemetery and fed then said goodbye to nearly everyone at the lake house, I felt completely wrung out. All who remained, aside from my little family, were what I considered my new family: The Cullens, Sue and Leia, Alice and Jasper, Rosalie and Emmett. The kids were crashed out on the downstairs couch, having snuggled together to watch Nightmare Before Christmas. My family surrounded me and I could feel the love there among us as we all cleaned up.

I nudged Edward, then whispered in his ear, "I wanna tell everyone."

He grinned at me, "Oh thank God! It was killing me. I knew you'd cave first though!" I laughed because it was true, I'm terrible at keeping good secrets.

I turned toward everyone congregated around the kitchen island and table. They'd all stopped and watched us, with bemused looks on their faces. I cleared my throat, "Thanks, guys, for everything. I couldn't have done all this without all of you. I mean it, I'm so glad you're all in my life. I think of each of you as my family, so thank you." I teared up a bit. "I wanted to share a bit of good news, for a change." Edward wrapped his arm around my shoulder, pulling me to him, then caressed my lower abdomen as I said, "Edward and I are going to have a baby!"

They cheered so loud, you'd have thought the Cubs had actually won the World Series!

"That's wonderful!"

"Congratulations!"

"Yay! I'm gonna be an auntie!"

Celebratory sentiments went round and round as we all hugged and kissed.

When things finally settled down Alice spoke up, "I'm pregnant, too!" I jumped up and down squealing like Alice at a shoe sale as the room erupted in congratulations, again. She pulled me to her, "I hope you don't mind, we've been waiting to tell you because of everything and didn't want to steal your thunder."

"Are you kidding me, this is great! I'm so glad you told us!" I hugged her and we both got silly jumping together, giggling.

Despite losing Charlie, my eclectic family was growing!

A/N. Phew! *swipes forehead and slumps over* That was hard to write. Thanks for reading. Please take a moment and share your thoughts with me.