Author's Note: I'm back people. School started on the 18th, so that means I'm going to be more busy. There may be some weeks where I don't update on time... But I will do my best to update on schedule!
Anyway, here is the new chapter. I've read this chapter and spent so much time with it that I can't tell if it's shitty... I'm hoping it isn't. Please please please tell me whether or not it is shitty. I'll try to fix it if I can, but I need feedback to do it.
Shoutouts: Thank you to YokaiAngel, Hibiki Loke, Evergreen Wolf (I would love if that happened, but I don't know how I would be able to pull that off... We'll see. Feel free to let me know if you have any ideas as to HOW to make it happen.), Abbyjohnson13 (yes, you have to wait with everyone else, myself included), A World Made Happier With Yaoi, Flamebiter, BlackNecko (chapters 45,46, and 47 - it's been a while since you've commented... I was wondering if you'd forgotten meeeeee), and 11wave11 (stop making me cry with happiness). Seriously, thank you everyone for the love. It helps keep me going when I get writers block (which happens wayyyyy too often, ugh). Thank you also to whitesilhouette1412, 11wave11 (for both LTM and BoY), and rlk19952 for following and to zorianax, 11wave11 (for both LTM and BoY), and rlk19952 for favoriting!
On with the chapter!
After sharing a lazy morning filled with soft kisses and gentle touches, Levi took Eren home, and as promised, Eren received a stern talking to from his mother, even though he didn't actually deserve it. After enduring that, Eren went back to his room, flopping back onto his bed and pulling out his cell phone to send a group text Ymir, Christa, and Annie. He composes several messages, writing and rewriting until he finally settles on one he likes, his teeth worrying at his thumb nail as he presses the send button.
I wanted to let you all know that I am awake and that I am okay now. Thank you for all of your help on Friday. I am in your debt. I'm sure you have a lot of questions for me; I'll try to answer them to the best of my ability. - E.J.
Replies come back almost instantly, making Eren's phone ping like it never has before.
Oh thank god you're okay! - C.L.
Geez, took you long enough, you bastard. - Ymir
Ymir, that's not nice! - C.L.
It's true though. - Ymir
What really happened, Eren? Christa had said that those guys were beating you up, but they were all unconscious when we arrived. I had to PRY you off one guy. - Annie
Eren freezes, realizing that it will be pretty hard to explain what happened without revealing his healing ability. He opens up his conversation with Levi and quickly taps out a question and hitting send, hoping that Levi will respond promptly.
Can I tell my friends about my healing ability? I don't know how to explain what they saw without mentioning it. - E.J.
Eren's phone pings with an incoming message, but it isn't from Levi. Instead, it's an image from Annie, depicting the bloodbath that Eren had left in his wake on Friday. Eren's eyes widen, recognizing the mangled forms of James, Thomas, Hunter and Francis. He takes in the blood trickling from Hunter's head, Francis's broken leg, and Thomas's torso speckled with the blood he coughed up before his eyes settle on James. He is barely recognizable, the bruises and blood adorning his face making it difficult to make out the features of his face. James's legs are both broken at nauseating angles, and Eren has to look away from the picture for a moment to keep from throwing up the contents of his stomach, the bile in his throat burning painfully. Eren closes the picture just in time for Levi to answer, so he quickly puts off responding to Annie's picture to read Levi's reply to his pressing question.
I wouldn't encourage or recommend it, but if it's the only way… In the end, it's up to you, but I would like to stress that you should choose who to tell wisely. - L
Eren stares at the message, reading and rereading even as his phone continues to ping with new messages. Having put it off long enough, Eren flips back to the group text and reads all the new texts there before finally replying.
We're waiting, Jaeger. Explain. - Ymir
Ymir! - C.L.
Don't tell me you aren't impatient to hear what happened. I know you are; more so than any of us. You're just to nice to say it aloud. - Ymir
I don't want to push him if it's traumatic! - C.L.
But we are entitled to answers aren't we? - Ymir
I'm with Ymir on this one. - Annie
You guys do know that I can read all of these, right? - E.J.
Do you plan on us telling us sometime today? - Ymir
Yeah, I do, but I'm trying to think of the best way to explain it. - E.J.
Try the truth, Eren. - Annie
I don't know if you'll believe me. - E.J.
I think we've seen some pretty unbelievable stuff today, Eren. - Annie
Annie has a point. - C.L.
Eren hesitates, gathering up his courage before starting to type again.
Okay, but don't say I didn't warn you. Try to be patient, okay? This might take a few messages. This isn't easy for me to talk about. - E.J.
I don't know how much you guys know, so I'll just start from the beginning. After school, Alexander approached me and asked to speak with me in private. He lead me to the dumpsters behind the school, at which point in time Thomas and James showed up with these two bigger guys, Hunter and Francis. Hunter and Francis pinned me against the wall and started beating me up under the command of Thomas and James, who basically said that they wanted my popularity and the attention of girls, so they wanted to put me back in the hospital to get me out of the way. - E.J.
That's so fucked up. -Ymir
My thoughts exactly. Here is where things get a bit… complicated. - E.J.
How so? - C.L.
Can I trust you guys not to tell anyone? Not our other friends, not your parents, no one. - E.J.
Ever? If Mikasa were to find out you told us something, but not her… - Annie
I know, I know. I'll probably tell everyone else eventually, but now is not the best time to tell them. - E.J.
If you plan on telling the others eventually, I'll keep quiet. For now. - Annie
I will keep it a secret if that's what you want, Eren. - C.L.
What Christa said. Now hurry up and tell us. - Ymir
Eren takes a deep breath, steeling his nerves as he types out and sends his next message.
There's a bit more to it, but the short version is this: I can heal myself. - E.J.
Whoop-de-do, Jaeger. I can heal too. Everyone can. Big deal. - Ymir
No, it's different. I heal quickly. Like… I could be burned by HCl and heal from the burns in less than a minute. - E.J.
WHAT? Do you mean earlier today? - C.L.
Yeah… I might have lied about only burning one arm… - E.J.
But that's impossible! - C.L.
Both my arms are perfectly fine. Not even scars. - E.J.
Pictures or it didn't happen. - C.L.
Eren opens his camera app and snaps pictures of both of his forearms and sends them to Christa through the group chat.
Do you believe me now? - E.J.
FUCKING HOW? - C.L.
I don't understand completely myself, but that's a whole different story, one better saved for another time. But do you believe me? - E.J.
What am I missing? - Ymir
EREN GOT ACID BURNS ON HIS ARMS FROM THE HYDROCHLORIC ACID DURING THE LAB TODAY IN CHEMISTRY AND IT WAS SUPER BAD BECAUSE THAT SHIT WAS SIX MOLAR ACID AND HE CLAIMED THAT HE ONLY BURNED ONE ARM BECAUSE THE OTHER ONE WAS PERFECTLY FUCKING FINE AND NOW BOTH ARE HEALED AND I DON'T KNOW HOW THAT'S FUCKING POSSIBLE! - C.L.
Eren, I think you broke Christa. - Annie
Oh, thanks for pointing it out. I didn't notice. - E.J.
Wow, sarcasm. That's original. - Annie
Christa, calm down. -Ymir
Do you guys believe me though? - E.J.
Yes. - Annie
I'm still having a hard time processing it, but I can't NOT believe you. - C.L.
If Christa believes it, then I do too. - Ymir
So is this why we didn't find you as a mangled heap on the ground? - Annie
That's one way to put it, but yes. - E.J.
How bad was it, exactly? - Ymir
Do you guys really want to know? - E.J.
I want to know if those guys deserved what they got. - Ymir
Very well. I can't remember everything, but if my memory serves, I sustained the following injuries: split lip, broken nose, several cracked and broken ribs, broken tibia and fibula in my right leg, broken humerus in my left arm, several fractures in my left hand from being crushed, various cuts and bruises on my skin that go who knows how deep, and something that made me cough up copious amounts of blood. Is that graphic enough for you? - E.J.
*Probably a punctured lung, btw. - E.J.
Fuck. - Ymir
And there aren't any marks on you and you aren't in any pain? - C.L.
That's the long and short of it, yeah. - E.J.
Did they see you heal? - Annie
Yeah. It was kinda different than usual, because usually I heal as I get injuries, but they didn't start healing until they stopped hitting me? Maybe if I'm still sustaining injuries, it won't work right away? I'm still figuring out how this works myself. - E.J.
So what turned the fight around? - Ymir
It was something James said. He was making fun of my engagement ring and saying shit about how Levi and I should just die because of our sexualities, and I just kind of snapped. For some reason, my healing factor decided to kick in THEN, and I didn't feel the pain anymore and I was at full strength again after weeks of wobbling around like a newborn deer, so I just took them out, I guess. Something was kinda off though, and clearly I wasn't quite in the right mind because I wouldn't have done THAT much damage if I was thinking straight. - E.J.
You've never been one to think STRAIGHT, if you know what I mean. - Ymir
Ymir! - C.L.
LOL good one Ymir. - E.J.
That's interesting. You get angry and then you suddenly heal, become strong, and go rogue. It's almost as if you went Titan or something. - Annie
Annie's comment makes Eren pause. He stares blankly at the text message, trying to process the implications of Annie's comment.
Did I… Did I go Titan?
Did your eyes back to normal again? - Annie
What do you mean? - E.J.
Your eyes were gold. Are they green again? - E.J.
Eren, mind now mired in uncertainty, opens his phone's camera application and checks his reflection. He stares into his eyes, their usual mesmerizing green, examining them for any changes. His eyes pick up on his golden flecks, the concentration of them far greater than usual, but Eren dismisses them as his eyes just wanting to see more gold, searching hard to see the yellow accents in his eyes.
My eyes are green. - E.J.
Do you think there is some sort of correlation between your eyes being yellow and your episode earlier? - C.L.
No idea. I'll need your guys' help, but I'll do my best to keep an eye on it. - E.J.
What's your story going to be if those guys try to rat you out? - Ymir
I don't know. Are they okay? Are they in the hospital? - E.J.
Ymir stayed with them until an ambulance arrived, if I am not mistaken. - Annie
Yeah, I did. I don't know how they are though. - Ymir
The ambulance actually arrived just before Levi did to pick you up. I think he thought it was for you. He seemed pretty shaken when he saw you unconscious. - Annie
What did you tell the poor man when you called him? - Ymir
I told him that Eren needed to be picked up and to hurry, then hung up. - Annie
Fuck, Annie! You can't just do that to someone! - Ymir
Why not? - Annie
Not giving any details except for that their significant other needs them and that they need to hurry can really freak someone out! And if he saw the ambulance pull into the school lot, then of course he's going to think Eren is in mortal danger! - C.L.
*face palms* - E.J.
Oh. Please pass my apologies along to Levi the next time you see him, Eren. - Annie
Will do. Are there any other questions? - E.J.
No. - Annie
Not right now. I'll let you know if that changes. - C.L.
Ditto. - Ymir
I'll talk to you guys later, then? - E.J.
Yeah. - Annie
Later, Jaeger. - Ymir
Have a nice day, Eren! - C.L.
Right back at you, Christa. - E.J.
Eren tosses his phone onto his bed spread, thoroughly exhausted by the conversation.
Why does shit like this always happen to ME? I swear, it's like some vengeful god keeps throwing me into the shittiest situations just for kicks. At least they gave me Levi… I don't think I would have survived this much abuse without him. He's been my rock through all of this and I couldn't be more grateful for him and everything he's done for me. Our one month anniversary is coming up… I should plan something nice for him. He deserves it.
Eren pushes off his bed, taking a seat at his desk and opening a new tab on his laptop. A couple of google searches later, Eren smiles, a plan taking form in his mind.
He's going to love this, I'm sure!
By Monday morning, Eren is back to his old self, positive attitude at full force as he walks back onto campus, but it falters when he senses the tense atmosphere in the halls. All around him, sets of eyes follow him, filled with shock and malice alike and burning holes into his shrinking frame. Whispers flutter about like bats of the night, brushing Eren from all sides and sending bolts of fear deep beneath Eren's skin. Eren tries to pretend that they aren't there, the stares and glares and the whispers that fill the air, but they continue to eat away at him over the course of the next two days until Eren is left with nothing but a quaking hesitance like the last leaf on a tree in autumn in the face of a large gale. By lunch on Wednesday, Eren is on the verge of bursting into tears, feeling immensely uncomfortable in his own skin, and he immediately seeks the solace of the lunch table that he and his friends regularly occupy.
"Hey Eren, what's wrong? You look like you're ready to puke or cry or both." Armin comments as Eren sits down heavily on the bench, his eyes immediately tracing the grain of the table before him.
"Haven't you noticed, Armin? There's a rumor going around, and not a nice one." Jean supplies.
"Connie, got any insight on the rumors?" Armin questions while Mikasa puts a hand on Eren's shoulder, trying to provide even a shred of security for the boy who's practically her brother.
"I've been listening in where I can, and there seems to be more than one, but some seem pretty far-fetched and have no evidence to back them up, so I think that people are on the verge of dismissing them, but there is one that seems to be building up some credit… The rumor that you're gay, Eren."
"How could they-" Eren starts, but cuts himself off before he can even finish his question.
"I heard you earlier this year, moaning 'I love you, Levi!' in your sleep. Didn't know he was actually real. Are you seriously in love with a guy? What a fucking fag!" James cackles.
"What are the other rumors going around, Connie?" Eren changes course.
Connie gives Eren an odd look, but answers the question anyway.
"Oh, just some crazy ass shit about you being some sort of demon or something. They say that on Friday you just went psycho and put a bunch of guys in the hospital. But you still have your cane and everything, so there's no way that could have happened, right? I swear, people come up with the craziest shit sometimes. The only thing that seems to be supporting that idea is that Thomas, James, Francis, and Hunter have been absent since Monday. Someone has been in contact with them though, says that's where the rumors started, but there is also word of those guys being hooked on acid, and their word has been discredited and their names tarnished. Funny, they'd been becoming more popular in your absence, but looks like that's all gone to shit now."
"Why are they in the hospital then?" Sasha asks, putting down her bag of chips.
"I don't know for sure, but there is a large amount of speculation that they got beat up by their dealer because they wouldn't share the drugs or something. No one knows for sure, but it seems they tried to pin it on Eren because they hate him. He's a competitor for social power, even though I don't think Eren really cares all that much whether he is popular or not. Everyone knows that Eren couldn't have beat those guys up though! He's been weak since he returned, and even if they did get in a fight, Eren would have to show some sign of damage and he is perfectly fine. Those guys must have got hit in the head harder than they thought they did."
"Actually…" Eren starts.
"Eren?"
The attention of the table suddenly turns to the blonde who approached Eren, a girl named Rebecca that Eren recognized from his German class.
"Uh, what's up, Rebecca?" Eren asks, nervously.
"Nothing much, but I, uh…"
"What?"
"People have been saying things, but no one really knows what is really true and what isn't because of all the crap that's been going around and confusing people and I, and I speak for others when I say this, hope that it isn't true but I just have to know so I was hoping that you would confirm for me that it isn't true." Rebecca rambles, her words becoming jumbled as she gets more flustered and nervous.
"Confirm what?"
"Confirm that you aren't gay!" Rebecca exclaims, her voice echoing throughout the small cafeteria.
A hush falls over the room, the air tense as all conversations cease and attention is directed toward Eren's table, waiting for an answer.
"W-what?" Eren stutters, hoping he didn't hear right.
"I - no, we - need to know if you are gay or not, Eren!"
Eren't heart pounds in his chest, his fight or flight instincts kicking in as adrenaline floods his entire system. He feels like running, running far away from this mess, but the pressure of hundreds of pairs of eyes on him keeps him rooted to the spot.
What should I do? Do I run, or lie, or let it be? Do I make it known to everyone this other side of me? If I tell everyone now, will they become my enemies? Do I reject this integral part of me, just to protect myself and my identity? Identity. What is identity? It are the parts that compose me, that make me who I am. If I throw away this shot, will I be losing a part of me? They're staring at me, expecting an answer. I'm running out of time, I need to leave, I need to leave, I need-
Eren's eyes find his ring, and his train of thought suddenly changes direction as he thumbs at sturdy silver band.
Levi… My love, the one I've endured this all for. He gave me this ring and wears one that matches it. I must not only consider myself but also him, the one who promised his life to me. If I reject this now, do I reject him as well? I know he said that I could… but that doesn't feel right anymore. No, I need to rise up and accept this! I need to accept this for both him and for myself!
Eren stands and addresses the entire cafeteria, the students waiting with bated breath for his answer.
"I am. I, Eren Jaeger, am gay. And no, it's not just some phase or experimentation. I have found love with one man, who would do anything for me and that I would do anything for. He is the love of my life and I will never let him go. I know that many of you will take issue with the fact that I am homosexual, either because you wanted a chance with me or you feel that homosexuality is disgusting, and in return I want you all to know that I do not care. If you dare to insult me, I will not take it lying down. If you dare to beat me, I will fight back with every inch of my strength. This is who I am, and if you don't like it, then too goddamn bad!"
The room is dead silent, Eren's words bouncing around in the heads of the students there as they reverberate in the room. Moments later, a tall brunette a few tables away stands up and also addresses the room.
"My name is Gina Reynolds, I am homosexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger." Gina announces to the room before walking over to stand by Eren's side.
Another person from the same table, a short girl with familiar black hair, stands a moment later.
"My name is Hikari Sato, I am bisexual, and I also stand with Eren Jaeger."
Hikari runs and joins Gina with Eren in a show of support. Soon after, the people of Eren's table stand one by one to announce their allegiance.
"My name is Mikasa Ackerman, I am bisexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Armin Arlert, I am homosexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Jean Kirstein, I am bisexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Marco Bodt, I am pansexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Ymir, I am homosexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Christa Lenz, I am polysexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Sasha Braus, I am straight, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Reiner Braun, I am bisexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Annie Leonhardt, I am demisexual, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Bertholdt Hoover, I am questioning, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
"My name is Connie Springer, I am straight, and I stand with Eren Jaeger."
Soon after, people from other tables, even people Eren barely knows, rise and show their support, forming a small mob behind the brunette. Before long, there is a group of nearly fifty people gathered around Eren in support of him. Eren has a wobbly smile on his face, tears pooling in his eyes as he looks at all of the people who are willing to stand by him in solidarity.
"Do you all see this? These people that have kept quiet until now, afraid to let people know who they really are. I was afraid too! Afraid of being bullied, of not being accepted by my own peers. But look around. Look around, people! See these brave souls that were willing to stick out their necks for the sake of another member of their community. We will stick up for each other because we now know that we are not alone. People need other people, and we now have each other. I want to say thank you, thank you to all who stand by me when I needed you most. In the face of possible threats, please know that I will stand by you the way you stand by me now!" Eren shouts, starting a round of cheers from the mob of people around him.
One by one, people start hugging Eren until the mass of people is in one giant, awkward group hug. There are people crying and laughing and smiling with the joy of finally finding their people and being free from the anxiety that held them down up until now. Even as the bell rings to end lunch and send students off to their next classes, the group dissipates slowly, the people in it not wanting to leave their new group of friends. Eren is crying, bidding thank you to each person as they leave until all that's left is his group of friends.
"Eren, get your stuff together, we have to go to class." Armin reminds, and Eren hurries to pack up his stuff and wipe the happy tears from his eyes.
"I know, I know, but I don't want this moment to end. I feel like a weight has been lifted off me and it feels fantastic, Armin! I feel like I could fly! Man, what I'd give for some 3DMG right now…" Eren grins, closing his eyes as he wistfully recounts the memories from many a day zipping around the training grounds as both a cadet and a fully fledged soldier, the sun warm on his back as he flies through the trees, the wind caressing his body and threading through his hair like a mother's touch.
"That would be amazing, but we better fly if we want to make it to class on time. Michaelis will have our heads if we're late."
"Yeah, yeah. Thanks again, everyone! What you did means a lot to me."
"Don't mention it." Connie grins.
"See you around, Eren." Reiner bids, walking off with Bertholdt.
"You still need to keep your guard up, Eren. It shouldn't be a problem, but that doesn't mean that you're out of the woods yet." Annie reminds.
"That's true. But there is safety in numbers, and with great friends like you guys by my side, I'm sure there will be very few problems!" Eren beams.
"Eren, get your butt in gear in the next ten seconds or I'm ditching your ass." Armin warns, heading for the northern cafeteria exit.
"Got it, Armin. See you later everyone!" Eren calls, scooping up his stuff and running to catch up with Armin.
Mikasa frowns as she watches Eren leave, sensing something off but she can't quite put her finger on it. She shrugs, gathering her things and walking with Annie through the southern exit to go to her next class.
Not even ten steps out of the cafeteria building, the one minute warning bell rings.
"Shit, we're going to be late!" Armin exclaims, picking up his pace.
"C'mon Armin, let's go!" Eren shouts, quickly picking up a run and dashing towards his English class.
Armin breaks into a run as well, barely keeping pace, and he arrives seconds after Eren, slumping into his seat next to Eren just as the bell rings for class to start. Through his exhaustion, something off tickles at the back of his brain, but he can't quite tell what it is. His eyebrows furrow as he looks over to his best friend, who is breathing heavily, though not nearly as much as Armin, as he pulls out his notebook for class. A moment later, it clicks, and Armin's eyes widen.
"Eren?"
"Yes, Armin?"
"You ran to class."
"Yeah, so?"
"Since when could you run? Eren, is there something you're not telling me?"
Author's Note: Yes, another cliffhanger. No, I'm not sorry. Please, tell me if this chapter was crap. Thanks.
