Hello !
Title : Misery Business
Genre : Drama, Romance.
Disclaimer : I don't own the characters unfortunately. They are the property of HBO and Charlaine Harris ! I only own my OC, Elizabeth Adams.
Chapter 42 : Words I Couldn't Say
I was slowly starting to realize what was going to happen very soon. To be honest, I was starting to get afraid, I would even say terrified.
If something went wrong, I would meet the true death and I wasn't ready for this. I wanted to live, more than anything. It was strange to realize that when I agreed to put myself in danger. However, it wasn't like I was going to change my mind. I wasn't a coward, and I needed to avenge them.
I was a vampire, I shouldn't be afraid of anything. Vampires were strong and nothing scared them. I was like that, Arthur had made me like that. I had changed during the last months but deep inside of me I was still the same vampire. I was strong and I didn't care about anything. My fear couldn't control me, a vampire dominated his emotion.
I needed to do this, I needed to be like Arthur had made me. I wanted him to be proud of me even if he was dead and even if he had told me to stay away from Russell. I wasn't really going against his order since Russell was coming to me.
I sighed and looked around. I was alone with Pam at Fangtasia. She was in the basement, preparing some silver chains for me. Eric was with Sookie and Godric… I didn't where he was and it was killing me. If only he could understand, if only he could trust us.
The door opened and I turned around. Eric was back but he wasn't alone. Godric was with him.
" We need to talk, Elizabeth. " Godric said as he walked towards me and grabbed my arm, dragging me to Eric's office.
I didn't resist, it was useless to do so. He was right, we needed to talk even if it meant the end of our relationship. We needed to make things clear. It was the only way.
He slammed the door and I waited for him to talk. There was a long silence, we were looking at each other, no we were studying each other and that was very different. His beautiful eyes were set on me except that this time his stare wasn't full of love like it used to be. There was still love but his anger towards me was masking his love.
He had every reasons to hate me, he had every reasons to be like that. I had betrayed him, I had hurt him so many times. I loved him, I knew this was love but I wasn't human. I wasn't used to feel that way, I wasn't made for love, or at least for a childish love. I was unforeseeable, I wasn't thinking about his feelings while I should.
I wished I could love him like he deserved to be love. I wished I could be perfect for him. I wished I wasn't hurting him. If only I could… But I couldn't, at least not for now. And even if I could, I was starting to think it was too late for anything, I was starting to thinking that it was too late for us. I had done too many things.
" I'm not going to change my mind. " I said.
" I know. " He said very calmly and I was surprised by that. He was controlling his anger very well. " I'm not going to change mine either. "
That was very clear at least.
There were so many things I wish he knew about me, about my feelings but there was just a wall between us. And I was the only one to blame for this.
" So, what are we going to do ? " I asked, unsure.
There was still a part of me which hoped we could work this out but then I had to be realistic. There was no way Godric was going to give me another chance, there was no way out story would turn out to be a fairytale. Those stories were made for children an this was the real life and we were vampires.
Maybe we were not made for love.
" I don't know. There are things I can't accept. " He started to say and he approached me. " What you've done, what you're doing, it's just unacceptable. "
I sighed. I already knew everything. I already knew what he was feeling.
" I know and as much as I hate this, I understand. Maybe we were not made for each other. " I had a lump in my throat when I said those words.
It was hurting me, it was killing. I could have never imagined it would be that hard. I felt like I was torn into pieces.
" Do not say that, Elizabeth. " His hands rested on my shoulders. " We've just made mistakes. "
" I've just made mistakes, Godric. " I said and shook my head. " I'm the only one to blame and you know it. I know I've hurt you, I know that you'll never forgive me. I should have cared more about your feelings. I'm sorry for hurting you so much. "
I was sincere and I hoped he believed me. Even if things were over between us, I just needed him to know that I've never meant to hurt him, that I've always loved him. I was reckless and stupid but if I was sure about one thing, it was my feelings for him.
" You don't know how much you've hurt me and how much I'm disappointed by you. "
" I'm sorry. I truly love you Godric, I'm not lying about that. I've never lied about that. I hope you believe it. "
Godric squeezed my shoulders, but it didn't hurt. He wasn't trying to hurt me, he was gentle on the contrary. That was surprising, very surprising. I expected him to be less gentle.
" I know you love me even if you have a very strange way to show it. " He smiled sadly at me. " Maybe we just need time. "
Another chance, that was what he was implying. It made me smile but I could tell that it was hard for him to say that.
The worst thing was that I didn't know if it would be enough. I didn't know if he could really forgive me one day, I didn't know if I could change after everything. I didn't even know if I would be still alive.
Time will tell but I was not very optimist.
" Aren't you angry ? " I asked. I wanted to understand how he could so calm, how he could say that we needed time. He was screaming at Eric and I tonight and now it was like it never happened. Either he was very good at controlling his feelings, or he was hiding something from me and had something in his mind.
This second option wasn't really reassuring, especially if it had something to do with Russell for example. I wasn't stupid, I knew that Godric had probably been thinking about him, not for me but for his child.
" You can't even imagine how angry I am but I'm over two thousand years old. "
" Maybe that's why we are so different, maybe that's why it doesn't work between us. " I stated and I knew that I was right. " I should get ready for Russell, I'll go in the basement. "
I started to leave but Godric grabbed my arm.
" I love you but- "
" -I know. " I interrupted him. " I love you too. "
Silver, I hated silver but it had to be like that. I had to endure this small little pain if I wanted Russell dead.
I was alone in the basement, and I was waiting for someone to get me. Eric was still here I think and Godric and Pam were also here. What they were doing ? I didn't know but I didn't really wanted to know.
There was just one thing bothering me. Sookie was here, I could smell her and I could faintly hear her talking with Eric. No, I could hear her scream at Eric and I was laughing. Eric knew exactly how to anger her but I truly believed that he liked her, I would even say love her, if Eric could feel love for someone else than Godric and Pam.
I was sure that he cared about her, he was attached to her.
Then, why was he bringing her here in the basement ? Why was he treating her like that ? Why was he chaining her up next to me ?
" What the hell are you doing Eric ? Russell's going to come here, Sookie can't be here." I exclaimed and was frustrated. I couldn't move since I was silvered otherwise I would have helped Sookie and hurt Eric.
How could he do this to her ? Why was she here ? I was the bait, Sookie shouldn't be here.
" I know but I need Sookie. It's the only way to keep you safe, I'm only doing this for Godric, Elizabeth. " Eric said and started to leave.
I was speechless. This wasn't what we had planned and I was ready to put myself in danger. Why was he doing this ? And what about Godric ? Did he know about that ? Of course, he knew and now everything seemed so clear. He was so calm earlier, he was nice and he seemed to understand me but that was fake. He was lying to me and now I knew how it felt. It hurt and I felt betrayed.
" I should have never trusted Eric. " Sookie said as she watched Eric leaving.
" I'm sorry. I would have helped you but I can't. " I said.
If I could help her, I truly would because I wanted to protect her from Russell. I should have seen it coming, I should have known that Eric would do something like and that Godric would be part of it.
" Bill will come for me. I know he's coming, I won't stay here for too long and I'll be safe. " Sookie said and was probably trying to convince herself. " By the way, I know what I am. " She said laughing.
" Oh ? And what are you ? " I asked and I didn't really know how I felt at this very moment.
Since I was a little bit like her when I was human, since I smelled a little bit like her, that meant I was probably going to learn what I was. Maybe that meant I would even discover why Russell had killed my family, I could feel deep inside of me that this was probably one of the reason they were killed.
" I'm a fairy. Thanks to my blood, vampires can walk in the sun apparently."
Fairy… That was incredible, completely impossible too.
" Are you sure about that Sookie ? "
" I am. "
That was… I couldn't even find my words. Sookie was a fairy and maybe I had been one too. Very strange, I had to say. How could it be the truth ? Of course, it would explain why my father, my brother and I couldn't be glamoured. Then, we didn't have any power, which was rather great if I was being honest.
" I hate him. I was ready to trust him and now, here I am. I can't believe it. " She muttered. " Why are you silvered, Elizabeth ? " She asked, realized in what kind of position I was.
" I was supposed to be a bait for Russell, but I think the plan has changed. Eric is going to use you to make Russell come here but then I'm not really sure how he plans to use you. I don't even know if he's still planning on using me. "
This was so annoying. Was I still going to be used ? This was a mystery and I hated that. Our plan was perfect, why did Eric chose to use Sookie ? It didn't make any sense. I wished I wasn't silvered, I could have done something, I could have learned something.
" Elizabeth I.. " She started but shut her mouth when someone opened the door of the basement.
It was probably Eric or Godric.
Maybe not.
It was a human and a dancer at Fangtasia, a fangbanger that Eric seemed to find particularly entertaining. What she was doing was surprising me, she was helping Sookie and soon Sookie was free and turned to me.
" I'm not going to leave you here. " She said and started to unchain me.
" Sookie, you should leave. I'm staying here no matter what, if Russell doesn't find you here, at least he'll have me. "
" I don't care. " She said and continued to remove the silver chains.
That was very kind of her.
" Alright. Then, I'll help you escape, it's the only I can do. "
When we arrived in the bar, Bill was already here and fighting with Pam. Where was Godric ? That wasn't really important.
" That's enough. Pam, stop. " I screamed and they both stopped because Bill noticed Sookie.
He was by her side immediately and Pam was ready to attack them but I stepped between them. I wasn't going to let them fight. Sookie was my friend and Pam too.
And before I knew it Godric was next to Pam.
" What the hell is going on here ? Why did Eric chain Sookie up ? " I asked and immediately noticed an embarrassed look on Godric's face.
He knew what Eric had planned, he knew he was going to use Sookie. Worst he knew that I wanted to protect her. How could he ? That was incredible !
" Elizabeth, it's the only way. " Godric said and I shot him a death glare.
" No, it isn't. We have the perfect plan ! Sookie, leave now. " I said and watched Godric moving, ready to stop them. " Don't you dare Godric. She has done nothing to you and I will fight you if it's necessary. "
He didn't say anything but I could tell that I had won this time. Godric would let Sookie go even if I was sure it killed him inside and even if he knew that if he fought me, he would win easily. Why was he agreeing ? Was it because he still loved me ? Probably.
" Come with us Elizabeth. Russell will kill you. " Sookie was nearly begging me but I wasn't going to follow her. It was my duty to stay here.
" No, leave Sookie. " I ordered and Bill started to drag her away. At least, he was useful for something. " Take care of her Bill. " I said and truly hoped that Bill would protect her. She needed to be protected from everything even if I wasn't sure that Bill could do this.
They left and I was completely alone with Pam and Godric. They both looked at me like I was crazy. Maybe I was but I had done the right thing. I was sure about that, I could feel it deep inside of me.
" I can't believe you're stupid enough to let her go while this is your only way to stay alive. " Pam said and left seconds later. Where did she went ? I didn't know but I didn't want to know.
She just couldn't understand me and what I felt towards Sookie. If my family and I were fairies, that would explain my need to protect her. It would make sense after all. Being a vampire didn't change anything and that was strange.
I knew that fairies existed but I could never imagine being one of them when I was human. That was just so impossible to believe, I had no telepathy power. I was just myself, I was just human. Then, I had to believe Godric when he said that I smelled like her, that my family smelled like her. Maybe we were just different from Sookie, maybe I didn't know some things.
" Elizabeth… " Godric started but I waved at him.
I truly didn't want to listen to him. I didn't need to hear his reproaches again. I knew that letting Sookie go was a stupid thing but I had to do this. I wasn't acting like a vampire but I didn't care.
" I know but I had to. " I said and paused, staring at him. " How could you do this to her ? How could you let Eric do this ? I can't believe it, Godric. "
" The fact that you don't understand it was for your protection is- "
" -I don't care about my fucking protection Godric ! " I interrupted him and faced him seconds later. My fangs extended against my own will but I didn't care and Godric didn't seem to care.
" But I care. " He confessed and I knew that once again I had hurt him but it wasn't completely my fault right ? " You're just so immature. You can't understand that everyone here wants you to stay alive, even Eric is concerned !" He growled and this time, his fangs were down.
I wasn't afraid, why would I be afraid ? There was nothing he could do to me now. It was too late. Russell was probably on his way, and maybe Eric was with him. I couldn't run away now because that would mean Eric's death.
" Godric. "I started but closed my mouth when I saw how hard his look was.
" I don't want you to meet the true death, Elizabeth. Can't you just understand that ? " Godric said and tensed.
And I knew exactly why he tensed. I could hear voices coming from the outside of Fangtasia. And I could hear one voice, one voice that could have made my heart stop if I was human. It was the same voice I heard the night my family was killed and it belonged to Russell Edgington. He was here…
I was probably going to die.
Godric took my hand and hid me behind him but that was pointless. Once Russell would see me, it would be over and there was nothing Godric or anyone else could do. I would never let him do this and he wouldn't do anything because he needed to protect Eric.
Russell finally stepped inside, dragging Sookie with him. When his eyes fell on me, his small smirk simply grew wider.
I hope you liked this new chapter ! So what do you think will happen now that Russell's here ? Were you expecting Elizabeth's family to be part fairy or something else ?
A huge thanks to princess moon shadow, DarkAngel620, Carlypso and Nicola for their lovely reviews.
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