Disclaimer: I do not own anything that doesn't have my name written next to it in pretty pink pen. I don't even own my horse Tig…that's how broke I am. I only claim ownership on Asher Hayden, Sarah Stevenson and anyone else that you do not recognise.
Summary: She went to the shut the door but paused, smiling slightly to herself despite the glare from the girl on her knees in front of the biker. "You do realise this is a twelve year olds birthday party?" It started at a twelve year olds birthday party in a Tacoma backyard ten years ago. Happy/OC
Stylized Violence – choreographed violence used in film and television to portray the illusion of real violence.
Chapter Fifty-Two – Dust Bowl Dance
I've been kicked off my land at the age of sixteen
And I have no idea where else my heart could have been
I placed all my trust at the foot of this hill
And now I am sure my heart can never be still
So collect your courage and collect your horse
And pray you never feel this same kind of remorse
There will come a time I will look in your eye
You will pray to the God that you always denied
The I'll go out back and I'll get my gun
I'll say, "You haven't met me, I am the only son"
-Mumford and Sons
Asher was standing beside Collie as they stood beside the grave in the same cemetery that her father and mother were both buried in. Glancing over at the woman standing beside the grave, a red rose in her hand, Asher realised that Mrs Davies was burying her second child. Her first born son and the little girl that had been murdered all those years ago. Her eyes fell on Lorca who was standing next to Petes mum, looking just as solemn. Pete had been like a son to him as well, and not because he was a Son but because Lorca had groomed him, made him the man he had grown into.
She felt Collie shift and looked up questionably to see him jerk his head behind her and Asher turned her head to see Happy moving in to stand beside her. She hadn't seen him since she'd told him she was pregnant. She thought he might have come back to Tacoma with her, help her go through this, but she hadn't seen or heard from him. He came in to stand beside her and she forced herself to stay still, not say anything.
After nearly an hour of standing there in her black dress and heels, even behind her sunglasses, Asher was starting to feel lightheaded. She hadn't eaten since…well she couldn't remember, things had been hectic. Not to mention she was dehydrated from crying her way through the service as people got up and talked about how much Pete had meant to them. She knew she was at high risk of miscarriage in the first trimester, but with all the things she'd been doing, she hadn't had time to think about looking after herself. Before she could brace herself she felt her body pitch forward towards the ground, only to be caught by a pair of strong arms. She heard Collie say something about getting water and she staggered along with Happy until she was sitting down on the grass. His large hand was fuzzy as he grabbed her chin and turned her head side to side.
"You eaten?" Asher closed her eyes but heard his gruff voice again. "Hey."
"No." Something was pressed up against her lips and she opened them, feeling the warm water go down her throat. She felt like shit, like some helpless child. "I'm sorry, I just…"
"Yeah we get it." Happy said, cutting her off. The water had helped and her head started to feel a bit clearer, and she tried to get up, only to have him push her back down. "Just sit a second." Grateful for the order, Asher slumped back down and tried to stop the nausea in her stomach. She felt terrible. "I've got her Col." Happy said after a bit of silence and she heard Collie start to protest, but she knew all Happy would do was give him a look and he'd be gone. "How ya' feelin'?"
"Is she alright?" Sarahs voice was there and Asher lifted her head to look up at Sarah. "What'd you do?"
"I'm fine Sare, just forgot to eat breakfast." She said, giving the girl a weak smile before scrambling up. She hated people fussing over her.
"Well everyones headed to the wake." Sarah said quietly and Asher nodded, giving another small smile.
"Okay, we'll be there." She could see Sarah giving Happy a sceptical look, but left them, heading back to her brothers who were waiting nearby. "I didn't mean to make a big deal of anything."
"Come on, I'll give ya a lift." She nodded and quietly followed him, glad that most of the mourners were gone so they didn't all see her hitch up her dress and slide onto the bike behind Happy. It was the first real contact they'd shared since she'd told him the truth as she wrapped her arms around his middle and pressed her cheek into his cut. They were back at Tacoma Auto in a few minutes and there were people in black everywhere. Asher stopped suddenly feeling ill as Happy walked across the lot. She couldn't go in there. Pete had died in there, she'd let him die in there. It was one thing to go in there when she was helping and there weren't many people there. But all those people in there knew the truth.
"I'm just gunna, maybe go back to the cabin." She said quietly. "Not really up to a wake."
"You spoken to his ma?" Happy asked, walking back towards her and Asher shook her head. She'd helped Bella organise the wake and whatever else she could do without having to be in contact with Petes mother.
"No."
"Come on." He ordered but Asher still hesitated. "Come on." It took a lot of teeth gritting but she stepped up and followed him inside. She saw him make a beeline to the older woman who was taking condolences from other people dressed in black. Up close, the woman had similar eyes to Pete, and his smile.
"Mrs Davies." She'd never heard Happy so gentle. The woman looked up and smiled up at Happy, a real smile.
"Oh Happy, you made it back." Asher watched in awe as Happy let the woman pull him into a hug. It was funny because the only one that Happy ever hugged was his own mother, and this woman was the complete opposite to Nora Lowman. "It's so good to see you." Happy didn't offer his condolences and Mrs Davies didn't say anything about it. Happy turned back to Asher and gestured her forward.
"This is Asher Hayden." He said and Asher stopped approaching, mainly because she saw the womans smile get bigger.
"Oh my, you are beautiful. Pete used to tell me these stories about the mischief you two used to get up to, but I'm pretty sure he was just teasing me." Asher smiled, she couldn't help it. She reminded her so much of Pete.
"I'm sure they weren't true."
"Yes, there was a lot of marijuana smoking in them and something to do with painting." Asher remembered the incident when they were painting the back wall of the clubhouse. "Anyway, come sit with me. I want to get to know the girl that my son loved so much." Asher felt awful for this womans assumption and she guessed it was written all over her face. "Oh honey." She took Ashers hand and lead her over to the old couch, sitting down. "I know there was never anything like that, I'm guessing you had feelings for another Son." The womans green eyed gaze drifted over to where Happy was standing at the bar with Kozik and Lorca. "Like I said, Pete thought the world of you."
"I'm sorry I couldn't do more for him." Asher said quietly, ashamed that she'd avoided this woman for so long.
"You did as much as you could." The woman still had Ashers hand in hers and she squeezed it. She actually found it easy to sit there and talk to Mrs Davies and when the older woman finally gave in and decided she wanted to go home, she wasn't surprised to see at least three Sons offer to take her. it was one of those rare moments where Asher saw how much SOA actually cared about their family. The last time she'd witnessed it was when Sarah had been attacked and all of them had been out the front of the police station. But that only reminded her that Pete had been waiting there for her. Her chest hurt at the thought and without thinking she stood up and headed towards the bar, grabbing one of the bottles of whiskey from the bar and a glass and sneaking out the back.
And that's where she sat, the bottle, unopened in front of her on the picnic bench. The glass hung loosely in her fingers and she knew if she stopped concentrating so hard it would fall from her fingers and smash into a million pieces on the ground. She knew that Happy had thought talking to Mrs Davies would help, and it had, right up until the point when she left and Asher was left alone.
"Maybe you're not really a Hayden?" The voice interrupted her thoughts and Asher jumped, sending the glass smashing to the ground, shattering all over the concrete. "Sorry, didn't mean to frighten you." Bill Hayden stepped out of the shadows and came around to stand in front of her, wearing a black suit. She hadn't seen him at the funeral.
"What're you doing here?" Asher asked bitterly, hating the man in front of her. Him, her father, Clay Morrow, all relatives did was bring her trouble. In the past she'd only ever trusted Madster and Tony, but since Clays threat seven weeks ago, she had avoided the womans phone calls.
"Came to see how you were doing." He took a seat across from her and took the bottle off the table, reading the label like he actually cared about the alcohol level or the vintage, before unscrewing it and taking a long sip.
"Well I'm still here, no thanks to you."
"I know I haven't really helped you the last few years." He started and Asher cocked her eyebrow, "or ever. But I know this is a huge loss for you."
"What would you know?"
"I lost my brother not so long ago remember." Bill replied.
"He wasn't your brother, he was the shell of a man that I never even knew." She hissed, clamping her mouth shut as soon as the words were out of her mouth. She'd never meant to say it. She had never even thought it. It made her sound like she hated Frank Hayden, which she didn't.
"Good." Bill said, not berating her for the words. He reached inside his jacket and pulled out a large manilla envelope and slid it across the table.
"What is this?"
"The truth."
"Wha-" She was cut off when she heard the familiar gravelly voice.
"What're you doing here?" Happy stepped out of the shadows and Asher saw a glimmer of fear in Bills eye. He'd sent Happy to jail twice and held him overnight countless times and the Tacoma killer still put the fear of god in the Sherriff.
"Just leaving." Bill said, standing up and nodding to Asher. "I'll see you Asher. Take care of yourself sweetheart." With a furrowed brow, Asher watched her uncle disappear around the side of the clubhouse before turning around.
"You aight? He not givin' you any trouble?" Asher hid the small smile on her face and shook her head.
"No."
"I gotta get back to Charmin, I'll take you back to the cabin." Oh. Asher bit her lip and stood up.
"You're not staying?" The set of his jaw, the narrowed eyes told her that she'd been fooling herself. He hadn't forgiven her. She'd screwed him over, gotten him in a vulnerable position with her, with his club and then bailed. Just because he was looking after her, didn't mean he was going to look after her.
"Nuh." Nodding, Asher picked the manila envelope up and followed him towards the bikes parked in the lot.
Bella looked over her shoulder as a large tattooed arm wrapped around her waist from behind.
"Stalkin' darling?" Lorca whispered in her ear and Bella sighed as she watched the crestfallen look on Ashers face after Happy had said something to her and they headed towards the lot.
"He's going to fuck her over." Bella said quietly.
"Not your problem." Usually she would have agreed, but she had a soft spot for Asher. Kid deserved to be happy after all the shit she'd been through.
"She's a good girl, Lorc. She doesn't always do the right thing, but its for the right reasons." She felt her husbands chin rest on her shoulder and his hands laced together over her stomach. "They both deserve to be happy."
"What? You want me to tell Hap the truth?"
"You're the one that invited Bill Hayden here. I saw him give her an envelope." Lorca pressed a kiss to the blade tattooed on her neck. "If Asher knows all that stuff, she's going to need Happy to protect her." She sighed and leant into the President. "Please, Lorca, whatever you know, tell Happy."
"I love you, you know?"
"I know." She said quietly, turning around in his arms and wrapping her own around his neck. "And We're gunna get through this baby. Them too." She jerked her head towards the couple retreating across the lot.
"Yeah, aight." Lorca pressed a kiss on her cheek and walked off, Bella watching him go. She knew that this thing with Spanner had hurt him real bad. They'd never had kids, they had chosen to focus on the club. But Spanner was like Lorcas kid, hers as well. But Lorca had turned Spanner into the man that he died as. Fun, loyal, trustworthy and honest. Much like the man that he was, and much like Happy, minus the fun part. She knew that Lorca would listen to her. It was very rare that she pulled out the Old Lady card and played her hand. But this was important. Asher and Happy weren't hurting just themselves anymore – they had Sarah, and now they were expecting a baby.
"Bella?" Speaking of the devil, Sarah Stevenson walked over, her sleeves pulled down over her hands and a hole in them where she'd stuck her thumbs through.
"Yeah sweetie?"
"Have you seen Asher?"
"I think she left with Hap." Bella said, gesturing over her shoulder and Sarah smiled.
"Thanks ." Before going to turn around.
"Hey," The girl turned around again and tugged on her sleeves again. "how're you going? With what's been going on with Asher and Hap." Sarah shrugged.
"They love each other, they'll sort it out."
"You sure?" Bella asked raising an eyebrow and the teenager nodded.
"Yeah, they will." Then she was gone. Bella couldn't help but shake her head. They should have just saved themselves the trouble and changed the girls last name to Hayden. She was Asher all over, except maybe a little more honest.
Asher took her shoes off and padded up to the cabin, turning the knob before realising Happy wasn't following.
"You coming in?"
"Nah, like I said, I got shit to do." He growled and Asher swallowed the lump in her throat.
"I don't want to be alone." She said quietly and he shrugged. "You're still pissed off about me leaving aren't you?"
"Why'd you do it?" he asked and she bit her lip. She couldn't tell him, no matter how much she wanted to. It would put him between Clay and her and she didn't want that.
"I can't answer that."
"Then I can't stay." He reached down to start the bike, but his cell went off and he pulled it from his cut as Asher leant against the door. Monosyllables were used before he flipped the phone shut and leant down to start the bike. "See ya back in Charming." Then he was gone, the sound of the Harley still being heard long after the tail lights disappeared.
Taking a deep breath Asher walked back into the cabin. Her body felt weary and she stumbled through her shower routine, letting the tears fall silently under the spray before wrapping herself in one of Happys sweatshirts and crawling onto the couch.
"Hey!" Happys voice broke through the haze of sleep and Asher lifted her heavy eyelids to see him leaning over her. "Wake up baby girl." She scrambled up, tugging the sweatshirt down over her thighs as he straightened up.
"I thought you were leaving?"
"Did Clay threaten ya?" He asked, ignoring her question.
"What?" her mind was still foggy from sleep as she rubbed her eyes before running a hand through her hair.
"When you were last here, did Clay threaten ya?"
Oh shit.
Looked like Lorca had told Happy what he knew.
"Hap-"
"Answer the fuckin' question, Asher." He growled and Asher sighed.
"He didn't threaten me." She said seeing him get angrier thinking she was lying. "He threatened you." She confessed.
"Fuck Ash." All the fight and tenseness that had been between them evaporated as he slumped onto the couch and rubbed his hands over his face. "Why didn't you tell me?" Asher rose her eyebrow, she was pretty sure that part was obvious. "So you left cause he said he'd kill me?"
"No. He said he'd make sure you were ratted out for Camerons murder."
"I'd go back to jail." Asher nodded quietly. "Shit."
"I've lost my whole family Hap, you and Sarah are all I have left." He rubbed his face again and she saw him inhale and she knew it was taking a lot of self control not to put his fist through something. He reached out and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, pulling her into him.
"I'm gunna look after ya, baby girl." Happy muttered, pulling her even closer and leaning back on the sofa. Lorca had told him as much as he could when he'd called Happy back, but this he hadn't expected. He'd threatened Asher with his freedom and Asher had caved. She knew Happy would never forgive her for leaving him like that. But the brave bitch did it anyway. He felt like shit for shutting her out. He should have known. He'd already failed at his first task as an Old Man. If she was worried about being a mother and an Old Lady, he was going through the exact same thing. At least she had some experience with Sarah. All he had was this overwhelming need to protect and look out for Asher, and the little thing inside her.
Clay and the club had enough to deal with at the moment. He knew fronting his president on the issue wouldn't go over well now. And by the way Lorca was speaking he wanted him to wait it out. Like he knew something Happy didn't.
Asher sobbed slightly into his cut and he kissed her head, his fingers fiddling with the long strands of hair.
She was broken.
This had broken her. And it was his obligation to fix it. Sitting there, he made a mental list of all the shit they had to do. He'd get her a house, somewhere where she could live until he was there permanently, move all her shit down there. Talk to Tara, he was pretty sure she specialised in babies or something. He'd have to tell Clay. And he'd have to get her enough money to survive when he went to jail so she wouldn't have to work. As soon as that kid was out of her though, he was having his name tattooed all over her. He was over playing games. She was his now.
