Freddie's p o v

I drove by all the places we used to hang out getting wasted
I thought about our last kiss, how it felt the way you tasted
And even though your friends tell me you're doing fine

Res just kept looking at me as we drove past the old abounded ferris wheel that hasn't been used in years and was just stored in an old unit it's been years since anyone's even looked at any of the junk in this place.

Just right of Santa Monica Blvd millions of people pass it every year but no one ever glances over there.

It was perfect for Tori and I it offered us shelter from the cold harsh weather and gave us privacy. I remember the day we discovered it like it was yesterday.

We had been on the boardwalk she had sneaked us some beer and tequila we had been playing games and man did we suck when we were drunk.

One vendor had gotten so mad he chased us out with a broom screaming at us in Spanish, I remember the feel of her hands inside mine as we ran laughing.

We were laughing so hard as people were yelling at us stumbling being chased by the cops we had jumped off the boardwalk and just kept running on the hot sand.

Tori was laughing so hard she had to stop and pee in the middle of the chase.

Course she was too shy to do it publicly so we found the nearest place an abounded storage shed that the fair uses.

We were so exhausted that after she was done we wandered inside hoping to find a place to chill out and we found a mattress it looked new even though she was a bit grossed out by it we laid down.

We started laughing all over again and she looked so beautiful crying we started kissing, one thing lead to another and we had sex.

Res shock his head as we drove past school the last place I had kissed her under the bleachers while we were skipping class.

Her lips were so sweet. I touched mine wishing I could taste her on them now.

Are you somewhere feeling lonely even though he's right beside you?
When he says those words that hurt you, do you read the ones I wrote you?

Sometimes I start to wonder, was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

I know she hadn't moved on I see her everyday I know she feel like shit but shouldn't she?

It was her fault after all.

Why didn't it make me feel better knowing she was hurting?

Was it all a lie? Did Tori ever care for me? Was I just a pawn? A tool she used to get through her parents fighting? Was I just a good time when she was high or drunk?

Did she mean it when she said she loved me?

I remember the day you told me you were leaving
I remember the make-up running down your face
And the dreams you left behind you didn't need them
Like every single wish we ever made
I wish that I could wake up with amnesia
And forget about the stupid little things
Like the way it felt to fall asleep next to you
And the memories I never can escape

'Cause I'm not fine at all

She might as well said she was leaving cause when she told me she lied it was like everything I knew about her just up and left me.

I still she her standing before me begging me to forgive her makeup running down her face snot coming from her nose.

The pictures that you sent me they're still living in my phone
I'll admit I like to see them, I'll admit I feel alone
And all my friends keep asking why I'm not around

It hurts to know you're happy, yeah, it hurts that you've moved on
It's hard to hear your name when I haven't seen you in so long

It's like we never happened, was it just a lie?
If what we had was real, how could you be fine?

'Cause I'm not fine at all

My smile must have been a mile wide as I looked at all these sexy pictures of her on my phone she loved to pose seductively for me I mean it was never slutty always tasteful but damn she knew how to work that banging body.

I feel alone now Cat hates me I can't blame her I treated her like garbage her friends all sided with her, Res is the only one I can talk to and he's cool and all but I feel him pulling away I don't know why.

Res's coughing fit brought me back to the present he looked pale but he was smiling damn I forget sometimes.

Freddie dude you are pathetic you love her you miss her talk to her

I can't after what she did how could I look at her trust her?

She said she was sorry maybe she really is who are you to condemn her judge her ?

No one is perfect but we all live we all make mistakes and mistakes help us grow don't you think she's beating herself up enough?

Cat was her friend first and she ruined that friendship

Let her live her life Freddie you don't like when people judge you by your past mistakes

Don't judge her give her a chance you like her I can see it

Life's short Freddie none of us know how long we have left don't waste it by living in anger and regret

I don't think Cat would like it

How do you know? Have you talked to her?

No

Maybe you should before you rush into excuses

Life's short just remember that were lucky if we get more than one chance don't fuck it up

If today I woke up with you right beside me
Like all of this was just some twisted dream
I'd hold you closer than I ever did before
And you'd never slip away
And you'd never hear me say

'Cause I'm not fine at all
No, I'm really not fine at all
Tell me this is just a dream
'Cause I'm really not fine at all

Lyrics Writer(s): Louis Biancaniello