Chapter 48: Birth of the Goblin, Part 5
"New York Police Department. This is Rosemary-"
"Oh goody! Thank God almighty that you're there! I found eight supervillains in an apartment complex in the Bronx. I'm currently out on the building hoping they won't see me. The address is 286 Hickney Avenue, and don't bother with the cops! I need Spider-Man!"
"Will do."
And with that, the police operator hung up. From inside his Green Goblin helmet, Norman Osborne giggled like a schoolgirl.
"Suckers! You've helped me with my plan!"
At the warehouse, Gwen was working on a sudoku puzzle when her cell phone rang.
"Dad? What's going on?"
"Gwen, you work with Spider-Man, right?"
"Yes."
"There's a guy who found supervillains at 286 Hickney, and he asked for Spider-Man."
"I'll be right on it, Dad. Bye."
Gwen turned to Peter.
"Peter, gear up. We've got the Six and two others at 286 Hickney!"
Some time later, Peter and Mary Jane arrived at the apartment complex.
"We've been had!" Peter mumbled upon close examination.
Just then, Mary Jane felt a buzzing sensation in the back of her head.
"Uh, Tiger?"
"What?"
"I don't think we're as alone as you think-"
And with that, the Green Goblin ambled up to the roof.
"Who-"
"Two bird-eating spiders with one stone! It's like April Fool's Day, except it's not April and you're the fools!"
"Sir, are you currently on any medication? Because if you are, I think you need several doses." Mary Jane replied.
"Are you seeing ocelots and are they commanding you to do this?"
"No, and you've fallen gloriously into my little trap!"
Peter turned to Mary Jane.
"Give him a light blast."
Just then, Green Goblin pressed a button on his right gauntlet and an unusual aircraft flew up.
"Let's play a game, Spider-Man. I call it Bullets KerPlunk!"
As if on cue, the aircraft's machine guns started firing at Peter and Mary Jane, who promptly began dodging the flying projectiles.
"Oh, what fun this is!"
Mary Jane then webbed up to the aircraft as it made its departure from the rooftop.
"Spider-Man is dead! Spider-Man is dead!" Green Goblin singsonged as he flew away.
"Not so fast."
The Goblin turned around and saw Scarlet Spider standing right behind him.
"You!"
"That's right, ugly, and I'm taking you in!"
"Ugly? Is that the best you can think of? I am your arch nemesis, the magnum opus of your rogues' gallery- the Green Goblin!"
Suddenly, the aircraft did a loop-de-loop.
"And now, I shall express my feelings in song!"
It flew past the rooftop where the three had met.
"The itsy bitsy spider crawled up the water spout. Down came the rain to break the spider's neck!"
Mary Jane felt the Goblin's hand wrap around her throat.
"Bye bye, miss American Pie! Drove my Chevy to the levee but the levee was dry! This'll be the day that you'll die!"
Just then, Peter webbed up to the aircraft.
"Nobody's dying today!"
"Well, I'm not dying! You and your girlfriend are, though!"
Peter watched as the Goblin flew over the Hudson.
"Now who are you really?" Peter asked,
The Goblin paused.
"Who are you?"
"If it weren't for me, you wouldn't be slinging webs!"
"Wait, what-"
"If not for me, you would have never encountered that spider. If not for me, you would never have fought your rogues. You owe everything to me, Spider-Man!"
Peter thought about it for a minute.
"If that's the case, then you're-"
"Yes, Spider-Man! I have used intermediaries for far too long. Now, you shall see the face of your arch nemesis-"
Green Goblin removed his helmet.
"-Norman Osborne!"
Mary Jane's jaw dropped.
"So-"
"Yes! It was I who had Morbius, Scorpion, and Electro created! It was I who created the Sinister Six! It was I who gave Black Cat her powers! It was I who unleashed that Sentinel and the Spider-Slayers upon you! And it was I who recruited Sergei Kravinoff to my cause!"
Peter gulped.
"So, do you have any quips to say before I kill you?"
"Yeah, one."
"Hurry it up!"
"All things considered, you're not a very lucky rogue."
"Is that the best you can do?"
"No, but if you'd look behind you-"
Norman Osborne turned his head and noticed a brown-haired woman in a yellow and green jumpsuit flying towards him.
"What the devil?"
Mary Jane grinned as Rogue approached them.
"I'm not letting some mutant with bad hair ruin my fun!"
The aircraft lurched as Osborne dove towards the Hudson.
"Are you crazy?" Peter asked.
"Tiger, he's gone on several long rants, threatened to kill us, and repurposed song lyrics so that they're menacing. If those aren't big red flags for 'Hello, I am a lunatic', then we're on Bizarro World. In which case, me Grimlock leader."
Peter glared at Mary Jane.
"Hey, it was my turn to make the Transformers reference!"
"No, it was mine!"
"No, mine!"
"Mine!"
"Mine!"
"WILL YOU TWO SHUT UP WHILE I TRY AND KILL YOU?!"
"Nah." the two replied in unison as Rogue dove toward them.
Osborne grabbed a pistol and aimed it at Rogue.
"Eat hot lead, mutie!"
Before he could fire, Rogue swooped down and grabbed Peter and Mary Jane under her arms.
"Come to mama!" she exclaimed as she airlifted them.
"Get back here!" Osborne demanded.
Just then, the aircraft plunged into the Hudson, taking Norman Osborne with it.
"Well, at least it was all his fault." Mary Jane muttered.
