Japan was reading hard core yaoi when suddenly he heard noises outside. Very strange noises so he decided to go outside and investigate.

"America wants to battle!"

"China! I choose you!"

"And I chose you, West!"

What the absolute fuck.

"China, use wok!"

"China used wok and Germany lost half of his HP!"

"Agh! Germany use beer attack!"

"Germany used beer attack! He threw a bunch of beer bottles in random directions!"

"China, block it! And then use chopsticks!"

"China blocked beer attack and stuck his chopsticks up Germany's nose! It was super effective!"

Prussia groaned in frustration and Germany was crying. "Bruder, I don't want to do this anymore, I'm going home." Germany walked away.

"Germany is unable to battle! China is the winner!"

"Germany has been defeated! The winner is America, from America!"

...

Japan was dumbfounded. What the fuck just happened. How dare they disrespect the fine art of Pokemon battling!

The end.