Disclaimer: I still don't own Scandal
AN: Merry Christmas Lovelies. This update is a little later than I originally planned but my family has been distracting. This update is a lot of sadness which is why I wanted it posted before now but oh well. I hope you all enjoy it. Don't worry,everything will work out.
Chapter 48: I Have Nothing
You see through, right to the heart of me
You break down my walls with the strength of your love
I never knew love like I've known it with you
Will a memory survive, one I can hold on to
Whitney Houson: I Have Nothing
Five times. Five times, that was the number of times Fitzgerald Thomas Grant II had to be revived before even reaching the operating room. When Fitz heard that news, in addition to nearly losing him twice one the table, it shook the family to the core. John Sr. , had been keeping Olivia up to date with new information and she passed it along. She made sure his schedule has been adjusted accordingly and that proper arrangement were in place for issues that couldn't be out off. The entire duration of the flight she sat beside Fitz, holding his hand while Mellie attempted to comfort Jerry who refused to sleep.
Luckily, JR had been at Kathleen's and he wasn't alone. If he had been, he never would have made it to the hospital. By the time Fitz arrived to the hospital, JR was out of surgery and was in post-op. He had had six blockages and was a ticking time bomb.
"Tripp," Kathleen embraced her brother. "How are you holding up?"
"I'm going to be okay but what about you, Kat? Have you even seen him?"
"Im, I don't know how I feel. They should be moving him soon. Then we can see him. The doctor said we should prepare ourselves though," Kathleen shared with her brother with tears in her eyes. Fitz stepped backwards until his legs hit the chair and his body sunk into it.
"Sit," he instructed and waited until she was seated next to him to place his hand on her shoulder. "Whatever happens, we'll get through this. We did it with Mom, we can do it again," he reassured, hoping there was some truth to his words.
Once JR had been situated in his room, the family took turns sitting with him. After much debate, Fitz and Olivia decided it was best for Josslyn to see him in case the worst did occur. They prepared her the best they knew how. She'd spent most of her time creating a storybook for her grandfather. Whenever she was sick she liked being read to so she thought she'd do the same thing for her grandfather.
"Are you sure you don't want to come with us, Tripp," John asked. Nancy had finally arrived and they were going to head home and get some sleep.
"No, I'm good."
Kathleen gave Mellie and Olivia a know look. Olivia mouthed she'd handle it before she kissed the top of Josslyn's head.
"If you say so," John responded. "Well see you soon, and our phones will be on so..."
"I'll make sure someone keeps you all updated and in the loop," Olivia assured before the couple left.
"Liv, you and Joss should head to Ella's," Fitz stroked his daughter's cheek. Mellie and Jerry had already headed to John & Kat's.
"I'm not leaving you. I know you have your family but I'd at least like to wait until Kare gets here," she gave him a knowing look.
"Jerry is worried out of his mind. He has all of us but..."
"...but he wants his big sister. As much as they but heads, they'll always pull together. Just like Joss kept asking about Karen. He's worried about how she's coping. He's worried about losing JR and Karen can relate. If probably stirs up emotions of your mom."
"And it feels like nothing I can say to him with calm his fears. Hell, nothing anyone can say to me to calm mine," his look sad and defeated.
"You know what," Olivia took one look at him. "Take Jossie," she instructed and they shifted her without much tussling, allowing her to remain asleep. "We're leaving. You're coming with us to Elle's"
"Liv, I can't..."
"No," she places a finger to his lips. "You need to get out of this place. You've been working, assuring everyone, and being a rock. You need some downtime. You need a nice shower and the ability to clear your mind. I'm not taking no for an answer, Fitzgerald." her tone firm and sharp, one that most would dream of taking with him. Then again, she wasn't most.
"Fine," he succeeded, not being able able to argue with her. He had no fight in him and knew she'd eventually wear him down.
"Thank you."
When they arrived to Ella's, they were welcomed with open arms. Over the years, Ella and Fitz had grown a fondest of one another as people who adored Olivia and Josslyn. She'd been to the White House a couple of times to visit Joss when Liv was out of town and they celebrated the young girl's birthday together one a several occasions.
Ella made sure the three were all squared away before she headed out to work. Olivia promised to call if she needed anything but she knew she wouldn't. Josslyn was asleep in one of the guestrooms. Olivia guided Fitz to the bathroom and instructed him to take a hot shower, informing him it would do him some good. While Fitz showered, Olivia sat on the other side of the door, replying to emails and fielding calls from Harrison and Cyrus.
It was odd for her to listen to the shower run and not hear his rich baritone voice be muddied my the beating of the water. He always sang in the shower claiming it was as refreshing as wiping off the grime from the day. She thought back to the days they were together, especially those at Camp David. They'd start their mornings off, washing one another, singing in unisons. Her hands lathering conditioner in his dark curls and while would run the loofa down her wet back in a circular motion. Her soft breast pressed firmly against his tone chest as she tilted his head back until the water, weaving her through his thick locks until she felt nothing but the silkiness of his curls.
Caught up in memories of yesteryear, she didn't notice the absence of the running shower of the opening of the door.
"You know, if because you're taking care of it, it doesn't automatically guarantee that you get a free show," Fitz smirked as he stood in front of the doorway that connected the bathroom to the bedroom. Olivia whipped her head to his direction and suppressed the tiny moan.
She gave him a quick once over, taking on his wet form. His hair was dark and wild, still damp for the shower. Beads of water still stuck to his chiseled chest, some trickling down, following the path of his chest hairs, a path that war etched into the pads of her fingers. The cream colored towel hung dangerously low on his hips, almost appearing as if it was about to become undone at any second. It should be illegal for a man in his fifties to be that well-built. Still after all these years, the sight of him nearly undressed stirred a fire in her belly.
"Well, you know I like to be compensated for all my hard work but I do not need a show. My memory is pretty sharp," she quipped playful before realizing exactly what she'd just said. She clearly her throat and looked from his piecing graze. "So, do you feel better now that you've showered?"
"I do. Thank you for forcing me to come."
"I always have your best interests at heart," she smiled softly. "I'm going to go let you get dressed while I check on Joss, call Mel, and change. Then I can throw something together and we can talk."
"That sounds nice," Fitz nodded as she stood.
Olivia padded downstairs barefoot, her hair slicked back into a wet curly ponytail. She didn't know why but for some reason she felt to need to wear her hair in it's natural state. Perhaps it was to bring comfort to Fitz or even Josslyn who enjoyed twirling her little fingers around her mother's curls.
She found Fitz sitting in the kitchen, sipping on coffee. She walked over the Kerurig machine, placed a mug down and began to brew her tea.
"Karen's at the hospital. I asked her if she wanted me to come but she Nora was a good comfort and Jerry was on his way back over," Fitz shared as he places his mug down and Olivia nodded.
"I can't even begin to imagine," Olivia said aloud. "French toast," she questioned, knowing it was a comfort food to him. He hummed signal a yes and she prepared to grabbed the ingredients needed. The two fell into an easy silence as Fitz joined Olivia in the cooking process. Being close to her, working around one another effortlessly brought comfort to him. It put his mind at ease and gave him a grounding he desperately needed, one only Olivia could offer.
Once their breakfast was made, they sat across from one another, eating slowly.
"Dad and I, it seems as though I'm finally getting to know him. Not as the tyrant to pushed me or casted constant judgment but as a man. As my equal. Now I may lose him," he choked up at the end and Olivia reached out and grasped his hand.
"Fitz, I honestly believe JR are going to pull through his. That old nut isn't going anywhere, anytime soon. He said he was going to be around to watch all his grandkids graduate high school and believe it. He has a fight in him. He lives for those kids. And while he may not voice it, he values your newfound relationship as much as you do. He's so proud of you. You can see it in his eyes and hear it in his voice. You just have to stay hopefully that he'll make it through this, alright."
"If it's ever to much, if all of this is too much to handle, you find me. We don't have to talk. If you need a minute to just breathe, to just stand there and be just let me know. Whatever you need, just let me know" she squeezed his hand, looking at the unshed tears in his eyes. He simply nodded, bringing her hand to his lips. He pressed three kissed to it before placing it back down and falling back into their silence. Those words were all Fitz needed to hear. She was there and that's all that mattered.
"Livi, your curls look nice today."
"Thank you, Fitz. You curls are nice as usual" she returned, knowing she had offered him something by changing her hairstyle.
"What about my curls," they heard Josslyn's small voice ask. She padded towards them, sitting in her father's lap. She reached onto his plate and ate a slice of his French toast.
"Your curls are just as wonderful, HoneyBee, even if they are a little unruly," Fitz chuckled softly. He knew it wasnt real but they felt like a family. The family they were meant to be. Within the craziness in his world, it was nice to have a this fantasy while it lasted.
It had been three days since JR's rollercoaster but to felt like three months. He'd formed in clot, forcing them to go back in. Being the political family the Grants were, in addition to the statement the White House released, Olivia was speaking on behalf of the family. Mel had offered to fly out with the twins but she decline. As much as she missed her younger two, she knew having Mel around, taking care of the twins & Josslyn, caring for Fitz and conferring with Harrison would be a bit to to much. She was in her grove and wasn't ready to throw it off.
Everyday Olivia and Fitz would go to Ella and Dan's for a few hours to allow Fitz to clear his head. Josslyn was optioning to stay to close to her siblings while her parents disappeared.
Olivia could tell the toll the whole ordeal was taking on Fitz and she was doing her best to keep him from sinking. She knew how Fitz got when he got in a funk and that's the last thing they needed. The two had made lunch this time and were once again sitting across from one another.
"Livi, I'm scared," Fitz confessed with tears in his eyes. "I've already lost my mom. I can't..." he strained out.
"Fitz," Olivia stooded and made her way over to him. Her next actions may have appeared questionable but she couldn't hold back. Seeing him in such a vulnerable and fragile state made her long to comfort him. She walked over to his side of the table and say in his lap. She wrapped her tiny arms around his much larger frame and brushed his curls.
"It's okay, Fitz, it's just us. You and me. It's okay to let it out," her voice soothing as he buried his head in the crock of her neck. His hot tears burned her like acid, inflicting his internal onto her. When he hurt, she hurt.
"Livi...my dad."
"I know Fitz, I know. It's alright to be scared. I'm here. You don't have to be strong for me. I'll be strong for you if that's what you need. Just let it all out and breathe," Olivia lulled, her fingers continued their comforting minstartions.
Very few people had witnessed Fitz break down in his lifetime but of them all, Olivia had been privy to most. He didn't have to worry about how she would perceive his actions, as to whether she'd see him as weak or vulnerable.
Fitz wrapped his arms around her and held on for dear life. He needed her to be closer. For her voice to be just a little louder, for her body to be a little warmer, for the sweetness of her hair to be to be a little stronger, for her caresses to be a a little deeper. He needed for her to continue as she was because it was the only thing keeping him sane and afloat.
Just as Olivia had predicted, JR pulled through. He had a long recovery ahead of him but he was making nice progress. When Christmas rolled around and the Grant Pope Camp found themselves together to share yet another holiday at their South Florida beach house, JR was looking like his old self. He was still sluggish but it was a vast improvement in a little over a month.
As they made it through the holiday season and into the New Year, the countdown began for Fitz's last year in office. Sally Langston was in running and Fitz had thrown his support behind her. While he didn't agree with all her policy and probably wouldn't vote for her, depending on which Democrat landing on the ticket, he was a man of his word. In addition to working out the his plans to divorce Mellie, preparing for life outside of the White House, all the activities in getting Jerry through his senior year, and campaigning for Sally and Mellie, who were running for president and senator respectively, he found himself spending more and more time with Olivia. As a fixer, co-parent, and friend to get through these transitions.
Karen and Jerry found themselves sitting across from their parents and experience a weird since of déjà vu. The last time they'd been seated like this, there parent's wearing the same poker faces was when they'd been told of Josslyn's existence. While both Jerry and Karen had an inkling as to what was to be said, they wouldn't believe it until they actually heard the words.
"So, your mother and I want to let the both of you know, after a lot of thought, we'd decided to get a divorce," Fitz shared slowly, looking between both his children unable to tags their reactions.
"We know this isn't any surprise to either of you," Mellie continued," however, that doesn't make it any easier to cope with. Both your father and I knew it was coming and it's still be difficult to process."
"And we just want the both of you to know that we love and the end of our marriage isn't the end of our family. We're going to remain friends. We vowed to always be friends and that won't ever change."
"Wow," Jerry said, looking up from his lap. "I never thought that you'd actually do it. I mean, I know Mom has Keith but..."
"... But you two are comfortable with one another. Even though you aren't in love, you still love and respect each other and it would be easier to stay together," Karen picked up where he brother left off.
"You has sacrificed a great deal for me," Fitz began.
"Fitz," Mellie reached out, shaking her head.
"No, Mel, it's true. You gave up your career and became the quintessential republican housewife to allow me succeed and there's nothing I could ever do to repay you. I want our children to know I'm going to do everything I possibly can to ensure you succeed just as you did for me. "
"We know that, Dad," Karen assured.
"Of course we know that, old man," Jerry added trying to lighten the mood. "Do you have any idea as to how this is going to influence Mom's run for senate?"
"We're working with Liv to get everything squared away. We have to deliver the news at just the right time," Fitz explained.
"With your father taking on the role he is and vowing this continued support throughout the process of our divorce, it shouldn't have too much of a negative impact. And of course Cyrus is helping."
"If anyone can pull it off, it's the four of you, especially with us campaigning right alone with you," Jerry boasted.
"We'll table that discussion for a later date" Fitz patted Mellie's hand, knowing how uneasy she still felt about involving the kids, despite how successful Karen had been during Fitz's last campaign.
"Dad where are you going to live. Mom's going back to California and you have the ranch but have you given any thought as to where you'll be? Especially when you consider Joss," Karen threw out, catching him off guard. With everything else that was going on, where he'd be living a year from now was the last thing on Fitz's mind; however, now that Karen had brought it to his attention, it was something he'd knew would plague him until he got everything squared away.
"I haven't thought of it but I'll let you know when I decide. More than likely, I'll stay on the east coast. Being close to Josslyn is something I'd love to do but staying in Washington isn't high on my list. I may stay in Cambridge, then I'd be close to both of my girls and Jerry, depending on where he goes to school."
"Alright," Karen nodded. " I personally would love for you to stay on the east coast if I get a vote."
"You do and I'll take it into consideration... I know you two are budding adults," Fitz looked at them knowingly" but this is still a transition for you both. If you want to talk, if you're having mixed emotions, just talk to us. We're here to listen."
"You love you both. You two will always be a reminder of everything right we did in this marriage," Mellie tacked on.
"What do you mean you won't be married anymore, don't you still love each other," Josslyn looked between Mellie and Fitz as they explained their divorce to her.
"Well, HoneyBee, you remember how you said Mellie and I don't act like a married couple," Fitz asked, taking Mellie and Olivia by surprise as the young girl nodded.
"Well, Mellie and I decide that while we still love each other and we're friend's that we're better off as friends. We know that we both will be happier as friends than as husband and wife," Fitz explained.
"So Mellie won't be my stepmom anymore," tears welled in the young girl's eyes.
"Oh Josslyn, don't cry sweetheart," Mellie extended her arms to Josslyn who snuggled up to her. "Technically, I won't be your step mom anymore but I'll still love you and I'll still spend time with you. I'm going to live in California next year but I'll still fly out and come to your recitals and competitions."
"But you'll be so far away," her tears feel softly.
"No matter how far I am, I'll still love you. I'm so glad I get to be a part of your life. "
"And Poppet, it's alright to be sad," Olivia added.
"Your mom is right, it's definitely okay to be a little sad. This is a huge change for all of us. We were both a little sad. So if you do feel sad, you have me, Mommy, Mel, Mellie, Karen, Jerry and all your aunts and uncles and Grandpa and Grandpa. "
"I'm going to miss you lots and lots and I love you even more," Josslyn hugged Mellie tightly.
"I love you even more, Jossie," Mellie kissed the top of her head. "Your dad and I being together won't change that."
Olivia and Fitz has been spending a great deal of time together. Just after Valentine's Day, her close friend Jessica had been brutally attacked and subsequently passed away. It was a typical burglary; however, they hadn't been expecting Jessica to be there who had returned home to grabbed her cell phone. The two assailants raped and beat her, made she'd ruined their plan, and left her for dead.
The loss shook Olivia to the core. She'd known Jessica since childhood. She, Jessica and Camille often played together as young girls. While Olivia had her husband to turn to, Fitz felt he needed to be there for her. After all the countless times she'd been his rock, being there for her was only the natural thing to do.
It tore him to pieces, watching as Olivia tempted to work through her grief to rationalize the occurrence. He knew Olivia had seen some horrific things in her line of work but this was personal. This experience wasn't something she couldn't check at the door. However, Fitz had been there for her as a rock. From explaining everything to Josslyn, to talking to her in the middle of the night as she shared memories of time she spent with Jessica.
April 2016
"Can't sleep," Fitz rubbed his eyes as he heard Olivia's voice on the other side of the receiver.
"Nope, can't sleep. The twins are sick and I keep thinking of Jess."
"I guess they caught whatever Jossie had."
"That's what I'm thinking. I just finished rocking Max to sleep. He's snuggled all close to me. Everything I try to place him in his bed, he whimpers."
"I'd whimper too," Fitz thought to himself. He remember the comfort of being wrapped in Olivia's arm, the warmth of her embrace as his head rested on his her supple breast, the rhythmic sound of her heart playing like a melody in his ear. He breast would always be his favorite pillow and her behind would always be his favorite place to rest his hand.
"He's a smart boy. I'd snuggle up to you also," Fitz said lightly and he heard Olivia giggled lightly. In the recent months it was such a rarity that he took pleasure in hearing the sound. He though she should laugh more often. To him, her laugh was like a cool breeze on a warm summer day; it was like air.
"Of course he is, look at who his mother is."
"I thought I was the cocky one in this relationship," he quipped.
"Most of the time but as we both know I do have moments," she responded. "So are you a set for your event tomorrow?"
"I am. Not really looking forward to spending all that time with Sally but I'm a man of my word."
"That you are. You'll be fine. I'm sure everyone will flock to you so don't worry too much about being stuck with Sally," she assured. "So tell me about your day," she requested and he began to feed her the details of his day. As she listened to him forgot who she was and were she was. She forgot she was married mother of three. She forgot that her husband was down the hall sleeping. She forgot she was cuddling her son in his room. Instead she was lost in a sea of Fitz. He was all that mattered in that moment. He made her pain go away. He made her feel normal. He made all the ugliness and sadness and grief in the world seem a little more bearable. He made it easier for her to just breathe and feel and focus on the good in her life. At this moment, that was what she needed. She needed Fitzgerald Grant to by her side. She knew as long as she had, she'd make it through anything.
June 2016
"You know what saddens me the most is that the twins won't remember her and Joss will probably forget her," Olivia shared, her head resting against Fitz's shoulder, as she sipped on her wine. They were in his private study, away from all cameras and intruders. Her five inch pumps were on the floor as her feet rested beside his, propped up on the coffee table. Fitz had one arm wrapped securely around her as one hand rested on her ass and the other twirled her curly hair around his finger. Fitz had noticed she's been wearing her natural curls more often. While he rarely voiced it to her, it was a change he was fond of. It made her feel as if she was his Livi just as he was hers.
The two had been that way for an hour, they'd gone through a bowl of popcorn while discussing their parents and the friends they lost over the years. Fitz told Liv of his good friend Robert he'd lost during his NAVY years. Olivia had heard stories of him but she never knew he'd passed away. It filled in many gaps for her and also explained his attachment to the name. Having Fitz as someone who could understand the pain she was experiencing much more comforting.
"That might be true but the twins and Joss will have your stories to hold into," Fitz reached for her glass and sipped on the dark liquid.
"You're right. Just like with my dad."
"Exactly the same way," he nodded as she took the glass back from him to finish off the last swig. She hummed in unison with his nod before she glanced at his watch.
"I should get going. I want to tuck the twins in."
"Don't forget to tell Joss bye," he reminded, his arm still wrapped around her.
"I won't. She'd have a fit if I left without saying goodbye," Olivia turned to look up at him. "She can be a bit possessive like all the other Grants in my life."
"You have that effect on all of us, Livi," he teased kissing her cheek.
"It just comes natural," she played along.
"Well, I'm certainly not complaining. You know I always love having you around."
:"I always loving being around you," she hugged him tightly, nuzzling close. " So, I'll see you tomorrow?"
"You'll see me tomorrow," he kissed her forehead.
When Fitz and Mellie went to the press about their divorce, it was a media frenzy. They waited until Mellie was steady in the polls and Jerry had graduated. He'd decided to stay on the east coast and attend Yale and that was something they wanted to fully celebrate before everything possibly went to hell.
They didn't want to take away the attention from such an important time in their son's life. Most of the country was shocked, that the loving couple was splitting up. They couldn't understand how a relationship that was thirty years old to suddenly come to an end. Some scrutinized them for now working things out. Others viewed them, particularly Mellie as courageous for choosing to go through such a life changing event while running for campaign.
The pair made it very clear that they were still a united front, despite the downfall of their marriage that they were still friends and parents. Fitz even campaigned harder for her after the announcement, wanting to be a man of his word. During the entire process, Olivia was by his side. He'd received negative criticism that he was throwing Mellie to the side now that his presidency was done and he'd accomplished his dreams.
Through it all, Olivia was there. The more time he spent with her, the more they felt like a married couple. As those feelings grew, he began to wonder exactly how Mel felt about the time he was spending with Liv. Mel wasn't a stupid man and he clearly knew where was a great deal of history between Fitz and his wife, Fitz didn't know just how much Mel knew. He guessed not much since Olivia never mentioned him voicing an issue with the time they spent together. In his eyes, Mel was a fool but then again so was he for losing Olivia in the first place.
July 2016
"He was there, Mel. When I needed someone he was there. You may be my husband, we may made vows but he was there when you weren't. You can't ask me to throw away an 8 year friendship because you feel threatened!"
"Friendship, is that what you're calling what's going on? A friendship," he chuckled darkly in disbelief.
"Yes, it's a friendship. We happen to share a child but we're friends. Fitz and I have a friendship. Which is no reason for you to feel threatened. I married you. I made a commitment to you.I chose you. No Fitz, you."
"No, you settled for me. You settled and at first I was fine with that. I love you and I thought that whatever happened between the two of you was in the past but clearly it is."
"But it is. It's been over for years before you even came into the picture,Mel. That part if my life was over," Olivia yelled trying to convince her husband.
"Then why won't you talk about. You never talk about it. Hell, I still don't know the real story behind Josslyn. We've been together going on five years and nothing!"
"No, you don't get to throw that in my face. You don't get to use that against. You've constantly told me that it didn't matter. My past is my past. You can't suddenly change because you failed to step. One of my oldest friends died and you weren't there, Akmal."
"How could I be when you're always running to him. You're having an emotional affair with him, Olivia!"
"He's my friend. We aren't having an affair, just friendship. There are some lines I refuse to cross... You didn't step up and now you're trying to make me a bad guy!"
"Step up? Olivia, you said you were fine. I'm not a mind reader. If you needed me, you should have come to me instead of running to someone else" he argued, ignoring the ringing phone in the background.
"I didn't run to him, he came to me. He saw that I needed someone, that I was hurting. I shouldn't have to say anything you should just know. You should be able to tell that something is wrong," her voice fierce as she stepped closer to him.
"No, no, no. Do not turn this around on me. You aren't a child, you are far from it. You have no issue expressing anything else. People deal with grief differently. When my wife says she's handling I take that as a cue to step back. Don't you go saying I didn't step up. I can't step up if I don't know I'm needed," he stared down at her.
Being the stubborn person she was,Mel knew it was unlike Olivia would admit being in the wrong; however, this time she was. He gave and gave and gave. He would keep giving but he needed to know what to give. He needed to know what was needed in order to provide it.
"We can go back and forth about this but it doesn't justify you questioning my relationship with Fitz," Olivia changed the subject quickly, seeing she wasn't getting anywhere. She tuned out the sound of the phone as it sounded off once again. Whoever it was could wait.
"It does. You're constantly running to him. Running to help him, to support him, to guide him, to assure him. You're running to him for his comfort, his confidence, his insight, his assurance . You shouldn't be running to another man for those things. If I stood back and allowed it to happen I'd be a damn fool," he spat.
"Allow it to happen," Olivia raised a brow. "You don't dictate my friendships. Fitz is always going to be a part of my life. He's the father of my child..."
"No! That's a bullshit excuse. Don't use Josslyn as a defense, this has nothing to do with her," he shouted. He couldn't believe she would use such a weak defense to justify her actions.
"He's the father of my child. He's one of my closest friends. Our friendship has withstood the test of times. There has been a time when I thought I'd never be able to look at him without feeling a sense of disappointment and angry. So it's nice that after all these years we are at a place of contentment in our relationship," she explained, purposely not going into great detail of the complicated past she shared with the man who would always have a significant portion of her love. "It's nice to have a friend nearby that I can tell almost anything to without the possibility of judgment or ridicule."
"That's what you should have me for. I'm your husband. Before I was your husband, I was your friend. You should know that you have me for those things," he words softening but his eyes still boring into her with much fervor and angry and disappointment.
"It's different, Akmal! It's just different. You're my husband," she paused as words escaped her. She didn't know how to label Fitz.
"Wow," Mel chuckled darkly at her expression, " Olivia speechless. This is a rare occurrence."
"Don't be an ass, Akmal.".
"And so she speaks...I'm your husband but Fitz is your? The fact that you can't label what he is to you, is the issue. You've spent more time with him this month alone than you have me in the last three. You should be able to clearly define who and what he is to you. And the logical explanation I can think of is that you're having an affair with him."
"I'm not cheating on you. Why can't you accept that."
"It may not be sex but you're having an emotional affair with that man. Hell, I wish it was sex. That...that would be so much easier. Easier to accept, easier to correct but this is much deeper. You treat him as if he's your husband and... Who the tell keeps calling," Mel groaned the last part as Olivia reached for her cell. Her heart began to go into overdrive as she read the had missed calls from Cyrus, the White House, Karen, Jerry, James, her mother, even Camille. When her house phone rang, she grabbed it immediately.
"Olivia Pope."
"Thank god. Why the hell haven't been answering your damn phone. I know thks must be difficult for you Olivia but now is not the time to crumble," Cyrus ranted through the phone.
"What do you mean a difficult time? Cyrus, what's going on," she asked in a bit of a frantic tone. She looked over her shoulder to see Mel was no longer in the room just as she heard the front door slam shut.
"Mother of god, you don't know," Cyrus gasped.
"Know what Cy?"
"You need to sit down, Olivia."
"Damn it Cyrus, just tell me," she demanded as she heard Mel's footsteps.
"It's Fitz. He's been shot," with those five words, Olivia's world stopped.
AN: So yeah, Fitz got shot. I know this is cruel considering what Shonda put us through but this has been in the outline since the get go. I tried to take it out and find another way but I got stumped. So I'm sticking to my initial plan. Just remember those two are in a good place and we're getting down to the wire. So Merry Christmas, Happy Holidays and all that other good stuff. Thanks for reading and reviewing.
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