Chapter 53:
"So you mean to kill me," murmured Bonnibel Bubblegum. She made it sound so commonplace. It was eerie in a way–that she was really that cold. Cherry Cream Soda had been thinking about that since she came here. The evening had started simply enough. She'd had the baby-shower with her family. She'd laughed and chatted her way across the hours before they had all gotten on their way, and she'd been in a good mood as she climbed into the car. Tonight was the night. She would see closure tonight.
Things had begun to change as she rode along in her limousine. She'd begun to have doubts. She'd gone into this with a plan to just murder her nemesis if it came down to that. Now she felt different somehow. Something inside had changed, and she felt... regret. Strangely it wasn't her henchmen that got cold feet. It was her. Doubts had surfaced. What if she needed this woman? What if there was knowledge that she still had that Cherry needed? And more to the point, what would Finn say? She'd been considering the unthinkable. What if she let this creature live?
Emotion said to kill the old bitch now. This was all she'd worked for. This was the chance of a lifetime. She might not get another. The cold, calculating side of her was playing devil's advocate–arguing both sides. Bonnie was valuable all on her own, with a hundred lifetimes worth of knowledge crammed in her skull. And there were ways to kick her off the throne and even put her in prison forever.
"I'm thinking of prison, actually," the gangster replied. Bonnie frowned at her in distaste. In imperious tones, she declared, "you have no right to imprison me." Cherry cut her off with, "but the Crowned Heads of Ooo do, Your Highness. Just what do you suppose they'll do when I tell them about Project Centurion? Do you imagine they'll see your private army of killer machines as you just trying to help everyone?" The color drained from the tall princess's face. "I'm going to depose you, Miss Bubblegum," Cherry said. "For sake of Finn's conscience, I'll tuck you away somewhere. The other princesses will probably be delighted..."
Bonnie glared at her. Coldly, she demanded, "do you suppose they'll be happier with you shipping poison to their kids?" Angry, Cherry retorted, "vou don't have the right to judge me, Your Highness..." Leaning over the table, the younger woman addressed her fallen princess, saying, "you were on the cusp of starving every man, woman, and child in this kingdom over your foolish pride. You refused to seek help. That poison puts food on people's tables! You spend your time on pointless experiments of dubious value instead of governing!" Bonnie glanced away. Those words stung more than anything else.
Coolly, Cherry said, "you'll abdicate. I'll draw up the papers. You'll make me regent. In exchange, it'll be a cushy prison with all the chemicals and gadgets you want." "Finn won't accept this," muttered Bonnie. Cherry laughed in her face. She laughed and laughed, slapping the table. Subsiding into soft chuckles, she asked, "is that what you've been holding out for?" The bubblegum princess's expression told all that needed to be said.
Cruelly, Cherry said, "you have a problem with manipulating and using people, Bonnie Bubblegum. If I've become a user, I learned from a master. Both my men got stars in their eyes at the mere mention of your name. You let that fucking witch kill one, and you tried to use up the other one until he wised up and stopped sniffing after your ass." Bonnie Bubblegum's face grew very pale. With a cruel little cackle, Cherry said, "that's right. Finn's my man, now, Bonnie Bubblegum. He'll be raising our baby for a change instead of running after yours."
The bubblegum princess felt despair crowding in on her. This was the worst things had been for her since she'd been kidnaped. Had Finn truly forsaken her? Had she lost him? She knew there was truth there. She hadn't done well with that. If she was at all honest, she'd treated him very badly. If he hated her, she'd given him plenty of reasons. What would she do now? Could she accept this? She hadn't expected to live this long. If this evil ingrate kept her promise, she would have a chance still. "Alright," murmured Bonnie. "Let's deal."
Meanwhile, in the palace, the uncanny copy of Bonnibel Bubblegum sat awaiting her own fate. She was hungry. They hadn't brought her food in days and her organic systems were suffering. They hadn't brought her any additional formulas to test. Of course, P-Bot knew why. They had what they wanted. No further testing was needed. She felt sad about that. She'd done all she could. She'd stalled, and she'd done her best to contaminate the results. In the end, they had their ways of ensuring her cooperation.
She was waiting for the end. If they had no further need for the princess, they certainly had no need for her. She was a loose end and a potential problem for them. It was just a question of when. And how. She wasn't organic–not completely. It wouldn't be so easy to kill her. And now she knew how to make the decorpsinator serum. She could revive her creator. As long as she was functional, Princess Bubblegum need never fear death.
The door opened, and the sex-droid climbed to her feet. Calmly, she disconnected the plug from her auxiliary charging port. She had enough power for one good fight. She had to live. For her creator's sake, she had to live. There were four of them when the door swung open. They were all big and packed with muscle. "Evening, gentlemen," the android greeted them. "Sound just like the princess," opined the biggest of them, a chunky piece of hard rock-candy. "Looks like her too," opined a sandwich-cookie. P-Bot frowned.
Edging closer, the big man, who seemed to be leader said, "we're here to turn you off..." "Have to say that's not usually what I hear," quipped the sex-droid. When she used to slip into town to shop for provisions for Braco, she'd often gotten catcalls. One of the thugs turned to the big man and said, "I heard she was programmed with all kinda' magic sex-tricks..." "I was," admitted the sex-droid. "Things that would blow your mind. You might say I'm a slutty version of Princess Bubblegum..." Licking her lips, she added, "I can send a man to paradise..."
Stroking his suddenly-hard peter, one of the would-be murderers said, "always wanted to fuck a princess!" In fact, he'd lusted over the Candy Kingdom's ruler for years. "Ok," rumbled the leader, "we'll fuck her before we smash her." Raising a portable blow-torch, the killer announced, "this is how it'll go... The longer you entertain us, the longer you stay in one piece..." P-Bot gave him a sweet smile, as she teased at one of the buttons on her dress. Just a little closer...
"Strip," growled the big man. The cry was taken up by the others, as the four crowded closer. "What is the meaning of this," shouted Peppermint Butler?! The four turned to the palace's annoying majordomo, who stood there holding a dinner platter. "Guess we'll have to take care of you too," growled the leader. As he stepped forward to snap the butler in half, P-Bot activated her defense application. The would-be rapist on the left glanced back just in time to receive a powerful kick to the head that cratered his skull. Throwing powerful kicks, the sex-toy killed a second by crushing his neck. Grabbing the third in a powerful embrace, she snapped his back halfway up.
Blowtorch-boy was by himself.
He had a weapon, and P-Bot circled with him, feinting and dodging. His eyes were clear and focused. He wasn't thinking about pussy now. P-Bot taunted him, asking, "like it so far? Does it feel good yet?" Face blushing, the candy-person cussed her. A voice from behind him growled, "Ordoth, decimari mea hostem argenti tui unguibus..." An invisible hand raked the rogue candy-person down his back, the scratches going bone deep. He dropped the torch in favor of reaching for his wounded back. That invisible talon tore open his front, shredding his innards, and he dropped and lay their screaming.
Peppermint Butler rushed over to P-Bot, excitedly shouting, "Your Highness! Your Highness! Are you alright?!" "I'm fine," replied the sex-droid, as she rose from turning off the torch, "and it's P-Bot actually. Princess Bonnibel's been taken. We have to find her." The stunned manservant could only follow the princess's double in a state of abject shock. Chuckling, P-Bot said, "I might have you teach me that voodoo you do, Peps. I need a new job anyway."
Back at the treehouse, Huntress had just smoked a giant chocolate bar that had broken in on them. Simon had frozen his bud, a giant cream puff. Both had gotten through windows and stopped stock still at the sight of the wood nymph wonder there in see-through lace with those perfect knockers on display as she twisted and turned to deal with multiple assailants. Now, Simon's shouts brought Simone and Betty down the stairs in a rush. Betty's big boobies came wobbling free of Fionna's top as she reached the bottom of the stairs, giving her hubby a sight he'd never forget.
As their assailants regrouped, Simone took stock of the situation and their chances. There were four of them–four very powerful wizards. Up until this point, they'd done their best not to hurt too many of their attackers. A lot of those people had been duped, and nobody wanted the repercussions of smashing them. Now though, push was coming to shove. Simon asked, "where's the Banana Guard?" "They're not answering," Betty replied. "We're on our own." Simone pulled the shattered door open, saying, "then it's time to take the gloves off. They're trespassing. It's time they left."
The crowd on the lawn stared as Simone came out, dressed in that sexy, see-through silk. As if that wasn't enough, Huntress came out next. And then, most shocking of all, Betty with her big knobs swinging free of the pajama top she wore. More than one man there found himself sporting a huge boner as those beautiful bodies came into view. In a loud, clear voice, the Ice Queen declared, "you are trespassing! Get off my lawn, or get smashed!" As she spoke, she began to float into the air, and her eyes shimmered with a blue-white glow.
Time stood still. The people on the lawn did that dangerous calculation. Could they stand up to the half-naked woman? Supposedly she'd given away the Ice-Crown, so how powerful was the Ice Queen really? There were hundreds of people out there. Simone only gave them a moment to ponder. Then she began to channel power, forming strands and threads of ice. Before their very eyes, she became an armored titan, sheathed from head-to-foot in impenetrable plates of ice. Extending a slim hand, Simone Mertens caused a massive lance of ice to form, twenty feet long, that dragged on the ground as she darted forward. The massive spear of ice ripped through earth and bodies alike. Even people who had been missed found the icy cold rooted them to the spot. Huntress followed that up with blasts of lightning, and Simon chipped in with jagged bolts of ice and stone-hard ice-balls.
The candy-people began to disperse, racing away in terror. In short order, a hundred of them had disappeared, leaving dozens frozen to death and the rest in a state of terror. As Simone turned to make another pass, a burst of gunfire struck the hard-frozen plates protecting the Ice Queen sending her tumbling from the sky. As Huntress screamed, the candy people surged over her. Simon grabbed the little woman by the scruff as she darted forward. Betty, who had been watching and holding back, turned to the hill that had been source of the gunshots and hurled a bolt of orange flame. As the thugs shouted and milled around the place where Simone had fallen, Simon took to the air. With Betty laying into the hillside, Simon soared over the milling thugs and flew towards the hill. A lone figure there was running down the backside of the hill in a panic, and Simon gave chase. He didn't know if his daughter was dead, but he would avenge her if she was.
Simon hurled freezing rays and conjured walls of ice to corral the killer. To his surprise, his foe twisted and turned around his frozen missiles and even vaulted one of his ice walls. Who is that, Simon wondered? The figure below him almost reminded him of Jake. Swooping down closer, he tried for a closer look. The assassin hurled an explosive almost in his face. Only a reflexive bit of magic saved him. Conjuring a globe of ice, he enveloped the bomb just before it exploded. The burst of flame and light knocked him from the sky, sending him ass-over-elbows back over the hill.
Back at the treehouse, the pack of candy-people swarming over the Ice-Queen was suddenly tossed aside as a massive dome of jagged ice grew in their midst. Dissolving the dome, the Ice-Queen rose up in her tattered nightie, her eyes blazing in rage. Clutching at the ragged edges of her bodice in a vain attempt to cover her bountiful boobies, she lashed out, slaughtering dozens more. This time, the mob did break, dispersing far faster than they arrived. An angry Simone came stalking up the driveway to find a relieved Huntress and a surprised Betty waiting on her.
Simon returned to the side of his wife and daughter. "The sniper got away," he announced. "I think it was some kind of shape-changer like Jake..." Clutching her bodice together and with a frown contorting her lovely face, Simone muttered, "Junior..." Her niece had just tried to murder her. Latching onto the younger woman's arm, Betty commanded, "inside, punkin. Simon, stand guard while we get dressed." The three heavenly bodies went inside while Simon took up station at the door.
