A/N: So I found some chapters to this story on my computer. They were written, three years ago. I thought that I would post them, anyway. Please be kind, they're from forever ago. Enjoy!
"Ava do you want to have this baby and raise it?"
"No."
"Can you put yourself through giving this baby up for adoption? You've already got a lot on your plate. You have to think about not only what's best for you, but what's best for Sophia."
"I don't know."
"I don't want you to rush into anything that you're not ready to deal with, but you need to think about all three scenarios."
"I know. Why do you want me to get rid of this baby?"
"Ava I've seen what people have done to babies they don't want. I don't want you to be one of those people."
"Mom I'm not cruel I couldn't do that to any baby."
"You don't know that."
"I do know that."
"Ava your father and I worked a case where a woman had a baby and after a month she put her baby in a cooler, tied weights to it and put it in the Hudson river."
"I could never do that. I could never hurt a baby."
"Are you sure? Ava it wouldn't be the same, anything could happen."
"I know, but I'm not like that."
"Mom please."
"Fine I'll go, but I just want you to think it through."
"Ok."
At three a.m. Ava wanders into the kitchen. Elliot is in the kitchen after a long day at work. He sips his drink. He looks up as Ava wanders into the kitchen.
"Whatcha doing up so late sport?"
"I feel like crap."
"So what are you doing down here?"
"I came down for a glass of water."
"You have water upstairs in your bathroom."
"Yeah but I don't have ibuprofen in my bathroom."
"Oh."
She walks past him, and stops at the counter. She opens a cabinet, and pulls out a bottle of pills. She moves to the fridge and opens it for a bottle of water. Elliot notices something as the light of the fridge peers out.
"Ava."
"What?" she asks as she shuts the fridge.
He flips on the light.
"You've got a sticker on your pajama pants."
She looks at the back of her pants and finds a smiley face sticker on the leg of her pants. She shakes her head and gently takes it off and throws it in the trash can.
The following week is both tense and hectic. All of the kids have events, and or appointments. Neither Elizabeth nor Dickie are very happy with their father and are giving him the cold shoulder. The only one who is congenial toward both Elliot and Olivia is Kathleen. Ava is barely on speaking terms with Olivia. On top of all of that Sophia is teething.
Olivia is now miserable. Every part of her body is swollen and she is advised by her doctor to take it easy. Of course Cragen puts her on desk duty because of this.
As the week draws to a close everyone is delighted to put the week behind them. Olivia stupidly brings up the baby with Ava by accident.
"So have you made a decision?" she asks.
"About what?"
"You know what," Olivia answers.
"I'm going to bed," Ava responds as she takes Sophia out of her playpen and packs her up the stairs.
Olivia finds that she's not quite ready for bed. She stays in the living room and does some reading before she goes to bed. When she finishes her book she goes to check on each one of the kids. Kathleen is at her friend Anna's house for the night. Olivia finds Dickie watching T.V. when she goes into his room.
"I'd like you to turn the T.V. off in an hour and go to sleep."
He looks at his alarm clock, and replies, "I'll definitely be asleep by then. I doubt I'll even make it to one. I'm tired. It's been a pretty long week I'll probably fall asleep before then."
"Ok night buddy," she tells the teenaged boy.
She marches up the stairs to Lizzie's room. She knocks on the door and elicits no response. She pushes open the already cracked door and finds that Lizzie is already asleep and snoring loudly.
Finally Olivia makes her way up to Ava's room. She finds the lights off. She turns on the hall light and goes in. Sophia is sleeping peacefully in her crib. Olivia kisses the baby and goes over to Ava. As usual her covers are kicked off. She pushes the door open just a hair more so she can see what she's doing. As she goes to cover Ava up she makes a shocking discovery. As she puts her hand on Ava's bed to maintain her balance while giving Ava a kiss on the forehead she finds something very unpleasant. Her hand lands in something warm and wet. She removes her hand from the bed and lifts it up to look in the light. She was unfortunately right. Which after such a long time of being a cop she should be able to recognize that feel. That distinctly eery feel. She goes to the bathroom and washes her hand off. She returns to Ava's room and flips on her lamp. She evaluates the situation and then goes down stairs to her bedroom. She gently rocks Elliot.
"El," she whispers.
He rolls over and opens his eyes. "Huh?" he asks her.
"I'm going to bring the baby down here."
"Why?"
"Because I've got to take Ava to the hospital."
He sits up and looks at her, "Why what's wrong?" he questions.
"I'll tell you later."
"Tell me now."
"Trust me you don't want to know right now," she replies, clearly not in a mood to argue.
"Ok," he sighs in defeat.
She brings Sophia into her room and lays her in the basinet. She then wakes Ava.
"Ava baby wake up."
"Um..." she cries.
"Sweetheart wake up."
"Mommy I don't feel good."
"I know we're going to go to the hospital," she tells her.
"Ok," Ava agrees.
Olivia grabs several old towels and leads Ava down the stairs. She gets her into the car without freaking out. By this point Ava is waking up and begins to become concerned.
"Why am I going to the hospital?"
"You're bleeding," Olivia replies calmly as she turns on the siren and floors it on her pursuit to get to the hospital.
"What?"
"Ava you're bleeding."
Ava looks around and realizes what's going on. She's so freaked out that she doesn't do or say anything because she's completely shocked.
They get to the hospital in no time. The nurse quickly realizes what's going on and puts her in a room immediately. The doctor comes in right after the nurse leaves the room.
"Miss Benson."
"Yes?" Ava answers.
"Do you know what's going on?"
"No, well yes I guess."
"How many weeks along were you?"
"Eight."
"We're going to do an ultrasound."
"Why?"
"We don't know exactly what's causing the bleeding. We assume that you've miscarried, but we can't be sure unless we do an ultrasound."
"Ok," she agrees.
A technician comes in and preforms an ultrasound. The doctor studies the screen closely as she does the ultrasound.
"Well?" Ava asks not able to see the screen.
"The fetus is still intact."
"What does that mean? Did I lose the baby or not?"
"I've going to have the nurse give you something to slow the bleeding. I'm not exactly sure what caused the bleeding. There's a good chance that this fetus won't be expelled if we start the medication."
"So if you stop the bleeding then there's a good chance that the baby will continue gestation correct?" Ava questions now fully awake and aware of what's going on.
"I'm not going to make any promises but it's likely that if we stop the bleeding the fetus will be ok. The baby does still have a heartbeat."
"So the what caused the bleeding?"
"I don't know that's what we've got to figure out."
"Ok," she agrees.
The nurse gives her the medication. The bleeding soon stops. The nurse informs Olivia that Ava has lost a fair amount of blood, but not enough to need a transfusion. She also collects a small vile of blood for tests.
"I'll also need you to pee in this cup," the nurse informs Ava.
"Ok," Ava agrees.
"You don't have to worry about it right now. Just let me know when you've got it filled up."
"Ok," Ava repeats.
"Why don't you close you eyes and try to get some rest," Olivia advises.
Ava nods. She falls asleep for nearly half an hour.
"Can you help me?" Ava asks.
"Help you what?"
