Party, anyone?
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"So," Alice said, looking up from her magazine, "I'm throwing a graduation party."
Amidst the exclamations at the table, Bella stopped, looked at Edward, and then at Alice, across from her. Alice smiled at her.
Then it dawned.
It was for her.
She closed her eyes, and mumbled some very bad words quietly to herself.
"Isn't that awesome!" Angela squeaked "I mean, we've never been to your place—cool!"
"Yeah, great," Bella added, "a party," remembering, with a sickening feeling, the last party the Cullens had thrown.
Everyone stopped and looked at her, the flat tone of her voice in sharp contrast to the voices around her.
"Too cool for a party, hey Bella?" Mike asked, grinning.
She managed a placating smile. "No, just not much of one for parties. That's all." She could feel Edward's hand, squeezing hers under the table.
"I think you'll enjoy this one," Alice smiled coyly. "Trust me."
Bella elected to say nothing else, but pushed back her chair, and grabbed her bag, ostensibly to go to class. In the hall, when she was sure of their privacy, Bella pulled him into a quiet corner. "A party? Really?" She hissed the words at him, like it was a shameful secret.
"I'm not planning a party," he said, still holding her hand. "I know better," and he smiled apologetically. "She really does see things working out well," he added. "It will be OK."
"Just like last time," she said through gritted teeth.
Things had not been exactly strained, but they hadn't been easy, the last few weeks. Between smoothing over the engagement news with Charlie, the stress of school, and the time away from Edward, Bella felt thinly stretched, and a party was the last thing she wanted to contend with.
Edward could hear, in the casual thoughts of those around him, the still vibrant rumours that Bella was pregnant. Her wardrobe choices did nothing to smother them, and he kept a protective ear open for anyone who had any ideas of asking her.
The girls were the worst. Their judgement was largely swift, and harsh. There were few exceptions. The morose fascination of the boys was tied to the sexual misinformation that they were usually awash in. He rarely left Bella alone at school, wanting to insulate her from their salacious thoughts, which he knew, were only a poorly chosen moment away from becoming equally indelicate words.
He could see one of their classmates eyeing Bella's midsection at that moment, wondering whose baby she was pregnant with, and if she would keep it. If Edward would leave her because of it.
He rarely reacted to the voices around him, but he smiled, and shook his head. Ridiculous.
"Something I missed?" Bella asked.
He shook his head. "No. I love you," he whispered, leaning in close to her.
"Good," she said, not entirely happily, "I'm going to need all of it to survive Alice's party."
Looking around the hall, the signs that the school year was waning were everywhere. Colourful flyers advertised everything from class rings, to grad photos, to illicit parties—those would be taken down soon, but always appeared again, the culprits of the subterfuge as populous, and persistent as the mushrooms that dotted the shady corners of the school grounds. They grew back as soon as they were mowed down.
They had agreed that after graduation would be best, and its arrival made Bella's heart flutter. It felt...soon. She thought she was ready. But leaving Charlie—leaving her mom. Everyone. She wasn't sure.
Hearing her breathing rate increase, Edward leaned down. "You'll be fine," he said softly, "nothing bad is going to happen to you."
She nodded, not wanting to tell him what was really bothering him.
A new set of footsteps was approaching the door—substitute teacher—Edward realized. He could hear, in the woman's thoughts, the distinct relief of not having to do anything this period, because they'd been left with a movie to show.
Edward eyed the boy, who was still eyeing Bella.
"Want to skip school this afternoon?" he asked her softly.
She was stunned. He never encouraged her to miss school. She narrowed her eye at him. "Why? What's going on?"
"Substitute, and a movie." He grinned. "We have about ten seconds to make a clean getaway."
"Sure!" she said, and they walked quickly down the hall, and around a corner as the warning bell for class rang.
"Skippers!" Alice hissed with a smile, as she and Jasper walked past them, making their way dutifully to class.
Bella and Edward only grinned, ducking by the wood panelled doors of the auditorium, and out the school's front doors.
"Your place, or mine?" he asked, still grinning.
"What brought this on?" Bella pressed, still not sure why he was so keen to be away from school.
He looked at her, as they slipped into the car, waiting, considering his answer. "Do you really want to know?" he said, finally.
"Yes!" She answered, a hint of exasperation in her voice.
He sighed. "People still think you're pregnant. Sometimes they think about asking, or saying something they think is subtle, but usually isn't."
Bella grappled with the realization. "Someone was…"
"Yes," he said softly. "It wouldn't bother me if you were, but their morbid fascination with it is...irksome. I can't protect you from the idiocy of all the adolescents around you, but I can at least try." There was a bitter tinge to his voice.
She didn't say anything for a bit, leaning back against the seat, lost in thought.
"What are you thinking?" he asked, starting the car. He would head to her place. She could always tell him otherwise, if she wanted to go elsewhere.
She shook her head. "Just...about how it seems to follow me. That it's hard to get clear of."
"It will end, Bella. It will fade," he said softly.
"It doesn't seem to have, for Rose," she countered, looking at him sideways.
Edward's grip on the steering wheel tightened, as did his jaw.
"I heard," he said. "I'm sorry about that."
"No," she said, "it's fine, with Rose, I mean, it's just...it hasn't for her. I don't want to be like that in fifty years."
"Then don't be," he said. "She made her choice, Bella, to remember it. To sharpen that memory into this life." He paused, struggling to put the process into words, "we change, very little, as vampires, but when we do...it's permanent. Our human memories are fuzzy. Weak, for lack of a better word. We choose what we remember. Otherwise, they simply fade."
Bella was trying to make sense of this. "She chose those memories? Of all of them, those? Why?"
It was Edward's turn to shake his head. "It was different for her, Bella. She didn't choose this life. Wouldn't have. She wanted to die."
He remembered, keenly, her tortured thoughts as she'd transformed, and the ugly, growing desire for vengeance, that had blossomed with her fresh strength.
He continued. "Carlisle would never change someone who had a chance to live. And with Rose, she was dying, but...he shouldn't have. It was, I think, ultimately cruel."
Bella was trying to process this. "And you think that...do you think the same way about me?"
"No!" He said, with a force that ruffled her hair. He was staring at her. She wanted to tell him to look at the road, but she knew, with an unhappy certainty, that he didn't need to. The steering wheel squeaked under the pressure of his hands. "No," he said more softly. "I don't. But I think you need time."
Bella folded her arms over her chest, defensive against this familiar message.
"It's your choice, Bella," he said, his voice quiet again. "I just...you know what I think."
She said nothing, but nodded, arms still folded, grateful that they were almost home.
She didn't feel so good about skipping school anymore, and cast about for a change in conversation.
Pulling up into the driveway, Edward became still, then rigid.
When Bella went to open the door to the car, he caught her arm. "No," he said, "wait here."
He got out, and faster than she could make sense of, he was back, pulling her from the car.
"What is it?" she asked.
"Someone's been here," he said simply.
"Who?"
"A vampire—one I don't know, and a wolf, too."
Bella swallowed.
"This was on your front door," he said, and handed her an envelope, the loose bit of masking tape flapping in the breeze.
Edward was still tense, watching, his body curved carefully around hers.
The envelope read: To Bella, from Jacob.
