Wow - first off, it's been a while. I kinda hit a big stumbling block but am pleased to say that my creative juice shave been revived and more will follow in a few days. I would also like to thank everyone who has continued to add my story to their alerts - that's almost as great as getting a review!

Chapter 53

With that one movement, Andy felt the despair wash over him. Before his eyes the woman he loved was being engulfed in painful memories and feelings and he couldn't reach her. He couldn't command her attention or get her to believe or accept that he would and could help her. For a split second he felt his resolve crumbling and in a flash he remembered his promise to never let her go again – to fight for her like he had never fought before. And he felt his resolve return in full force.

Reaching for her hand again, Andy grasped her fingers between his and moved slightly so he was sat in front Prue. He knew he had to get her attention and get her to listen before it was too late. The research he had done indicated that if Prue became too overwhelmed with the memories and the pain then she could withdraw completely inside of her self due to the trauma and he could not risk that happening.

"Prue look at me. You have to look at me sweetheart." At that final word she visibly flinched and shrank back a little more.

"Prue's it's me, Andy. I can't begin to imagine how utterly terrifying and heartbreaking this must be for you right now but you have to listen to me, please." Tears began to course down his cheeks as he let go of all his emotions, hoping the force of them would make her listen.

"I need you to know that no matter what you are remembering right now, no matter what horrible things, it doesn't change how I feel about you. I need you to understand that I know some of the memories you are reliving because…."

Andy suddenly stopped. He knew what she was remembering because he had read her diaries along with her sisters and he knew that in any other situation, she would upset and angry about that. But he knew he had to be honest. Nothing short of complete honesty was going to wash it and he knew that that involved serious risks. But, he told himself, even if she ends up hating him for it, it will be worth it if she doesn't withdraw into himself.

"You're not going to like this but I know what you are remembering because I read your diaries. With the accident, and your condition we needed to know what had happened and what had been going on so in the course of the police investigation we obtained and read your diaries. I'm sorry that I invaded your privacy but I'm not sorry I read them."

With those words, Prue's eyes suddenly focused on Andy's face and he realised they were filled with anger. Pure unadulterated rage rumbled across her face and he braced himself for the onslaught of her anger.

"How dare you? How dare you read something that was none of your business and had nothing to do with you? There was nothing in there that could have helped you out – you were just being nosey and snooping weren't you? What? Were you looking to see how long I cried when you left? Trying to make yourself feel like the big man for breaking my heart and abandoning me? Are you happy now that you know? I bet you're glad you got out when you did now you know what an ugly, useless, pathetic whore I turned out to be right? I bet you even think I got exactly what I deserved – well you'd be right, I did. It took someone like HIM to prove to me just how worthless I was and reaffirm everything my grandmother said. She was right all along, but then you knew that didn't you? You just strung me along in high school for the fun of it. You never really loved me – you knew what she knew that I wasn't worthy of anyone's love and attention. After all that's why my mother died isn't it? Because of me. Because I wasn't worthy of being her daughter or Piper and Phoebe's sister or Grams first granddaughter because I was useless and pathetic and irresponsible. Why couldn't you all just let me go, let me die? Do you really hate me that much that you want to make me suffer? Make me relive all the pain, torment, humiliation and degradation."

Prue finally ran out of breath and anger and words all at once. A she had been talking she had ripping at the medical equipment she was hooked up and pulling at the needle she still had in the back of her hand. She had been like a wild woman ranting and Andy had struggled to keep up with all she had to say. But he did manage to keep up and every word from his mouth broke his heart. He could hear the pure anguish and despair in her voice and it killed him that it was partly due to him that she felt that way. But just as quickly as the hurt was the anger to bubble up into his throat. As her words came to end and she began to visibly sag in the bed, all the fight leaving her Andy knew that this was his chance. She had finally revealed the depth of her self loathing and as much as it killed him to hear that she wished they had let her die, he knew she needed to say it, to get it out in the open before he could attempt to heal her with his words and his actions.

Taking his chance, Andy moved even closer and pulled her as roughly as he dared into his arms, careful not to catch any of the neglected equipment around them. He pulled her head against his chest and tightened his arms around her protectively, even when he felt her try to pull away. He held her against his chest and moved his head down so his mouth was level with her ear. His mind briefly flashed back to a time where this would have been the beginning of their foreplay when he would tease her by gently blowing against her ear and then whispering to her exactly what she did to his body, before telling her exactly what he was going to do to her body given half the chance.

But he cast aside those thoughts as completely inappropriate and focused his thoughts on the task at hand. "Don't you ever say those things in my presence again. You are not worthless or ugly or any of those other horrible things you said. You are and always have been incredibly strong and beautiful and you mean so much to so many people. I don't care who told you otherwise, you have to believe me. Because I know you better than anyone else ever has or ever will. Even now, after so many years apart, so many things have change but so many haven't. I know that deep down inside of you is the girl I fell in love with all those years ago and who has never left my heart. She may have suffered through the worse one human being can do to another but I knew she is still there. I truly believe that because you are strong and no matter, your spirit is unbreakable. Your grandmother could not have been more wrong about you – your mother was so proud of you and she loved you so much, just like your sisters. Just like I do. None of the terrible things that have happened to you have been your fault. Your mothers' death, our break up, the torture of the last few years – none of it is because of you. Your mother's death was a terrible accident. I know that deep down inside you know that. I need you to find that part of you that has never given up and remember that. Our break up – that was my fault. I was an idiot and I need you to know that I have regretted what happened ever since. I wish I could take it back. I wish I could go back and change what I did and what I said, that way you never would have ended up in the hell you have been in for the past few years. I could have saved you from that and you don't know how sorry I am. But I am here now. And I need you to listen to me, to believe me, to believe in yourself and to believe in me. Because now that I am here I am not going anywhere ever again. It doesn't matter what you say or what you do because nothing could make me leave you ever again. I am going to spend my life helping you recover from everything and it doesn't matter how hard it is, or how much you push me away."

Andy gently pulled away from Prue so that he could see her face. He had felt the shaking as she began to sob during his speech and his heart shattered just a little bit more if that was possible at the look on her face and in her eyes. He could tell that she had listened because she was torn. She looked like she was having an internal battle and it scared the hell out of him. Removing his arms from around her, he gently caressed her face, raising her chin so that she was looking into his eyes.

Taking a deep breath he ploughed on, hoping that this would work or help in some way. "Prue, baby, I know you hurting so badly right now, and I know that your conditioning is telling you not to believe me but I need you to. I want you to look into my eyes as I tell you this because you remember as well as I do that you could always tell if I was telling the truth by looking into my eyes. So look at me baby, look deep into my eyes. I love you. I have never stopped loving you. Your sisters love you so much and all we want in this world is for you to be ok. For you to get better and for you to be happy. Because we love you. And we will do whatever it takes. Because for once, it is our turn to look after you. To protect you. It doesn't matter what has happened in the past or what we have found out. What matters now is you. You are all that matters to me, to us. I am sitting here in front of you, telling you I know everything and telling you it doesn't change the way I feel about you and I know that goes double for your sisters. Please, don't ever doubt again how much you mean to us, because you mean the world to us. I love you."

Andy continued to stare into her beautiful eyes and he willed her to feel the love he felt and believe the words he said. Despite the tears in both their eyes he could still see the myriad of emotions as they flitted across her face. And then she slowly opened her mouth, took a deep breath and went to speak….until her attention was suddenly diverted to the doorway and her 2 sisters who had obviously been standing there for a while judging by the looks on their faces and the tears glistening on their cheeks. Suddenly, Prue didn't know what to say and she simply looked between Andy and her sisters waiting to see whether they would confirm or deny all that he had just said. She even began to hold her breath as the seconds ticked by…..