Sorry it took me so long to update this one. I've been crazy busy lately! Not much action in this chapter but it helps transition to what is coming.
Chapter Fifty Three: Changes
The first thing I'm aware of is excruciating pain radiating through my upper left side. I will myself to fall back under but then everything comes back to me: talking to Gale in the woods, the turkey, Gale getting whipped, me getting whipped.
I force myself to open my eyes. I settle for one eye open because my left eye is swollen shut.
Sunlight is just starting to come in the windows. I realize I am in the living room, still on the couch. Finnick is sitting next to me asleep.
"Well, look who's awake." I hear Haymitch's voice but it takes me a second to find him in the room. He is sitting in the corner in the arm chair.
"How are you feeling sweetheart?"
All I can do is groan.
"That's what I thought."
"Gale?" I manage to ask him.
"Looks like he's going to be fine. There used to be a lot of whippings before Cray, your mom was the one we took him too.
I can't remember a time before Cray, a time when there was a Head Peacekeeper who used the whip freely. But my mother must have been around my age and still working at the apothecary shop with her parents. Even back then, she must have had healer's hands.
I try to nod, but I can't. And it's not long until whatever medicine I'm on is pulling me under again.
The next time I wake up, I'm more alert.
Shivering, I realize I'm really cold, but the pain is eased. Opening my eyes, both of them, I find myself covered in green tinted snow. For a moment I'm disoriented as I realize I'm in my bedroom, not on the couch. I've been changed out of my torn clothes as well. My muscles ache slightly from not moving and I stretch my legs out.
"Katniss," I hear Finnick's voice and I carefully turn my head to look at him without disturbing the snow. He kisses my forehead gently avoiding the lash on my head. "How are you feeling, love?"
I do my best to smile at him, "It feels better, not as much pain." I tell him.
He looks visibly relieved, "Thank goodness."
"How is Gale?" I ask him.
"He's doing okay, the snow coat is helping him too." Snow coat. So that's what this is called.
"It's a good thing we have snow." I say, "I wonder what they did in the summer."
Finnick shakes his head, "I don't think I want to know."
I agree.
There's a light knock on the door, then my mom comes in. She smiles when she sees me awake, "It's good to see you awake,"
"How long have I been asleep?"
"Well, I've had you and Gale both on pain medicine, mixed with sleep syrup for about two days."
"Two days.." Wow two days, no wonder my legs ache.
Finnick moves to the other side of the bed so my mother can look at my wounds. She takes off the snow coat blanket. I can clearly see the whip marks on my arm and I imagine my face looks the same. The wounds aren't open anymore, but they are still swollen. My mom bandages me up the best she can and returns down stairs.
I notice Finnick is glaring at me. "What?" I ask, sitting up.
He takes a deep breath, I see the relief of having me awake as worn off. "Katniss... I" he sounds angry, struggling for words. He stands up and starts pacing the room.
"Are you mad at me?" I ask him feeling nervous.
He sighs, "Katniss you just.. threw yourself in front of that whip... right in the middle of trouble..."
"What was I supposed to do?"
"You could have..." he throws his hands up in the air.
"See you don't even know!"
"You could have came and got me, or Peeta, or Haymitch or all of us!" he says almost yelling.
"He could have been dead by then! You think I should have just let him die?" I'm yelling now.
He sighs again, "No. But I do think you need to not be so ready to throw yourself into danger. You could have been killed. He could have killed you for interfering with a punishment. Please, please stop jumping into trouble." his voice is softer now, and I see the hurt in his eyes.
My anger fades, "Finnick, honey, I had to do something, I couldn't just stand and watch. I..." I stand up awkwardly putting the pressure on just my good arm and I put my hand on his face. He leans into it, "There are going to be times when I'm in danger. Just like there are going to be times when you are in danger."
"I never want to see you in danger." he says looking into my eyes.
"I never want to see you in danger. But we both have to realize that we are heading into a rebellion and we are right in the middle of it."
"Promise me you will always come back to me."
I smile, "I thought you knew? We're in this together, until the end."
"Together." He kisses me gently, "Now get back to bed." he pretends to swat at me.
I spend the next few days around the house. My wounds get progressively better but they still hurt. They have scabbed over now. I'm getting a little stir crazy in the house. I've only been allowed to go out to the porch. Everyone has tried their best to make it easier on me, but I know I've still been short tempered and a bit of a grouch.
Prim tried to get me interesting in a book. So for a while I sat down and read, and honestly I thought it was interesting but I could only do it for a short period of time before I need to do something. But there wasn't anything to do. Finnick taught me how to tie knots. And while it keeps my fingers busy it isn't enough to keep me for long. Annie got me to play games with her and that was fun for a while too. Peeta tried to teach me how to bake and that ended with a complete fail. What I really need is to get out of the house.
Finally, finally I convince Finnick to go on a walk through town and Peeta comes with us.
We rouse Haymitch and drag him along with us. Haymitch complains, but not as much as usual. We all know we need to discuss what happened.
Haymitch asks. "Any new ideas?"
"I want to start an uprising," I say.
Haymitch just laughs. It's not even a mean laugh, which is more troubling. It shows he can't even take me seriously. "Well, I want a drink. You let me know how that works out for you, though," he says.
"Then what's your plan?" I spit back at him.
"My plan is to make sure everything is just perfect for your wedding," says Haymitch. "I called and rescheduled the photo shoot without giving too many details."
"You don't even have a phone," I say.
"Effie had that fixed," he says. "Do you know she asked me if I'd like to give you away? I told her the sooner the better."
"Haymitch." I can hear the pleading creeping into my voice.
"Katniss." He mimics my tone. "It won't work. Not here, not yet."
"The attitude is different here than the districts with uprisings." Finnick adds.
"And anyone who tries anything, Thread is going to come down on hard." Peeta adds.
His mention of Thread reminds me of something, "How did you all know to come to the square, when I was whipped?"
They all look at each other, when Finnick speaks, "Well, you know how all the whippings are playing live on television?" he asks.
I nod. Then I realize what he is saying. They watched me get whipped, they saw it on television. I was whipped on every screen in Panem. "I bet President Snow loved seeing that." I roll my eyes.
"Well he might have, for a second. But then I'm sure he hated it." Peeta says.
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"Well everyone in the country who happened to be watching the television saw you jump in front of Gale, defending him." Peeta says.
I shrug, "So?"
"It's caused trouble. Good trouble and bad trouble depending on how you look at him." Finnick tells me.
"Sweetheart, pretty much it's the talk of the country. Or at least every district we have friends in. Katniss Everdeen is fighting back. You have inspired them, even more now than you already have. You are defying the Capitol and they love it." Haymitch tells me straight.
I sense there is more, "But?"
"But, as it is good for the Rebels, it is bad for you." Haymitch clarifies.
I gulp, just another reason for President Snow to have me killed. I've just put my family in danger, again.
"It's alright Katniss, it's going to be okay." Finnick tells me seriously.
We stop talking about anything serious as we get closer to the square.
We step into the square and all come to a stop simultaneously. The square has been transformed. A huge banner with the seal of Panem hangs off the roof of the Justice Building. Peacekeepers, in pristine white uniforms, march on the cleanly swept cobblestones. Along the rooftops, more of them occupy nests of machine guns. Most unnerving is a line of new constructions βan official whipping post, several stockades, and a gallows β set up inn the center of the square.
"Thread's a quick worker," says Haymitch
Some streets away from the square, I see a blaze flare up. None of us has to say it. That can only be the Hob going up in smoke. I think of Greasy Sae, Ripper, all my friends who make their living there.
"Haymitch, you don't think everyone was still in-β" I can't finish the sentence.
"Nah, they're smarter than that. You'd be, too, if you'd been around longer," he says.
"Well, I better go see how much rubbing alcohol the apothecary can spare."
He trudges off across the square and I look at Peeta. "What's he want that for?" Then I realize the answer. "We can't let him drink it. He'll kill himself, or at the very least go blind. I've got some white liquor put away at home."
"Me, too. Maybe that will hold him until Ripper finds a way to be back in business," says Peeta. "I need to check on my family."
"I have to go see Hazelle." I'm worried now.
"I'll go, too. Drop by the bakery on my way home," he says.
"Thanks." I'm suddenly very scared at what I might streets are almost deserted, which would not be so unusual at this time of day if people were at the mines, kids at school. But they're not. I see faces peeking at us out of doorways, through cracks in shutters. Finnick holds my hand tightly reassuringly.
An uprising, I think. What an idiot I am. There's an inherent flaw in the plan that both Gale and I were too blind to see. An uprising requires breaking the law, thwarting authority. We've done that our whole lives, or our families have. Poaching, trading on the black market, mocking the Capitol in the woods. But for most people in District 12, a trip to buy something at the Hob would be too risky. And I expect them to assemble in the square with bricks and torches? Even the sight of Peeta, Finnick, and me is enough to make people pull their children away from the windows and draw the curtains tightly.
We find Hazelle in her house, nursing a very sick Posy. I recognize the measles spots. "I couldn't leave her," she says. "I knew Gale'd be in the best possible hands."
"Of course," I say. "He's much better. My mother says he'll be back in the mines in a couple of weeks."
"May not be open until then, anyway," says Hazelle. "Word is they're closed until further notice." She gives a nervous glance at her empty washtub.
"You closed down, too?" I ask.
"Not officially," says Hazelle. "But everyone's afraid to use me now."
"Maybe it's the snow," says Peeta.
"No, Rory made a quick round this morning. Nothing to wash, apparently," she says.
Rory wraps his arms around Hazelle. "We'll be all right."
I take a handful of money from my pocket and lay it on the table. "My mother will send something for Posy."
When we're outside, I turn to Peeta. "You go on back. I want to walk by the Hob."
"I'll go with you guys," he says
"No. I've dragged you into enough trouble," I tell him.
"And avoiding a stroll by the Hob ... that's going to fix things for me?" He smiles and nudges me rolling his eyes.
We wind through the streets of the Seam until we reach the burning building. They haven't even bothered to leave Peacekeepers around it. They know no one would try to save it.
The heat from the flames melts the surrounding snow and a black trickle runs across my shoes. "It's all that coal dust, from the old days," I say. It was in every crack and crevice.
Ground into the floorboards. It's amazing the place didn't go up before. "I want to check on Greasy Sae."
"Not today, Katniss. I don't think we'd be helping anyone by dropping in on them," Finnick says.
We go back to the square. I buy some cakes from Thomas while they exchange small talk about the weather. No one mentions the ugly tools of torture just yards from the front door. Thomas tells me to be careful. The last thing I notice as we leave the square is that I do not recognize even one of the Peacekeepers' faces.
Things only get worse. The mines shut down, and stay shut down for almost two weeks. People are punished for offences so long overlooked we've forgotten they are illegal.
Gale goes home to wait for the mines to reopen.
I get Haymitch to hire Hazelle as a housekeeper, resulting in some extra money for her and greatly increasing Haymitch's standard of living. Its weird going to his house finding it fresh and clean. He hardly notices because he is fighting a whole different battle. Peeta and I tried to ration what white liquor we had, but its almost run out. The last time I saw Ripper, she was in the stocks.
A crate of wedding dresses arrives one day with a note from Effie saying President Snow approved these himself. The wedding. Is he really planning to go through with it? What, in his twisted brain will that achieve? Is he still trying to distract the country?
Our own personal wedding is still being held. That is the one thing I am looking forward too. Only three more days until the wedding, our real wedding. Then I will be Mrs. Odair. Katniss Odair. I kind of like the sound of that.
