A/N: If a Dark!Team Machine isn't your cup of tea, definitely feel free to skip today's menu.

...

You are being watched. The government has a secret system - a machine that spies on you every hour of every day.

I know because... I built it.

I designed the Machine to detect acts of terror, but it sees everything... violent crimes involving ordinary people,

People like you,

The government considers these people irrelevant.

So do we.

Hunting alongside the authorities, we work in secret.

You will never find us

But, victim or perpetrator,

If your Number's up…

We will exploit you.

"Help! Please, help me!"

"Are you alright, ma'am?"

"No, I'm not! That woman just shot someone and she's getting away, Officer!"

"Okay. Did you want me to take care of that for you, ma'am?"

"Obviously! I mean-" Joss Carter loudly yawned, disinterestedly glancing up from her phone at the woman. She shot a second glance over at the running perp.

"Hey, you. Stop!" It was more like a stage whisper than anything and it did absolutely nothing. "You happy?"

"But-"

"Something wrong, partner?" The witness sighed in relief, realizing there was another cop nearby.

"Yes, there is! Officer-"

"Yeah, Fusco. This woman here is unable to do anything herself and thought she'd spend her day by wasting my precious time." Fusco shook his head at this in disbelief.

"What woman? All I see is a-" Before he could finish his sentence, the witness had left them in a flustered mess.

Joss could see it now: that witness would probably soon be crying somewhere about "the indecency of the police" and about how "corrupted" they all were. And did Joss care?

Not one damn bit.

He discreetly walked out of the building, eyes subtly peeled for any sign of trouble as he approached his car.

And, even with this alertness, he still screwed up majorly.

The man smacked into the concrete hard, reeling in the pain of a shot knee cap.

"Hersch. I can't believe you didn't see that coming." A sneer found its way easily onto Shaw's face as she coldly walked over to her target.

"Really," She sardonically began to shoot out a reprimand, kneeling next to the man. "It was almost as though you wanted to get shot. Is that what you want?"

The gun proudly showed itself again as she sharply slammed it into his side.

"Is that what you wish for?"

He couldn't help but let out a pained gasp at this, unwillingly allowing the dripping blood to greet the floor like an old friend.

"You're getting old, Hersch. Maybe it's time to retire."

After all, taking down a rookie would've been more challenging than today.

So, truly, this was all so very, very pathetic.

"Now, please," The whisper still maintained its serenity, even as another bullet was dying to shove itself into the man. "What were you doing in my neighborhood?"

"I'll never tell you anything, Shaw."

Since she knew that to be the truth, said bullet got its heart's desire.

"I'm really disappointed in you, Hersch. I really was expecting more."

Footsteps approached, and the sneer receded in a smirk of recognition.

"We've got a new mission?"

"Why else would I be here?" Root disdainfully looked down at the now dead agent as she helped Shaw up.

"Good." A pause, as the women took one last glance at their target. A lagoon of blood had started to form only a few seconds ago, turning the pavement a disgusting shade of scarlet.

"Is he dead yet? I'm hungry."

"I'm not paying this time."

"Aww, but, Sameen- "

"Call me that again and I break your neck."

"You're not paying, got it."

They continue to walk on, bickering and bantering while the lagoon formed a lake.

"The irony is," Greer wheezed out as growing rivulets of agony wreaked havoc on his body. "We were truly trying to be Good Samaritans."

Harold raised an eyebrow at this statement, scoffing ever so slightly.

"That's a rather touching sentiment, Mr. Greer. However," A bullet hurled itself from the shadows, permanently silencing the dying man, "Only a sentiment."

The shadows formed into an apathetic assassin. One who no longer paid their target any heed.

"Truly, Mr. Reese, you have rather impeccable timing. He was beginning to bore me."

Reese looked back to the shadows, shortly followed by a dashing Belgian Malinois. The dog stood next to the dead man, looking up at his Alpha with pleading eyes.

"Foie! Hier! "

"I guess there's no time for Bear to play with today's toy, is there, Finch?"

"Unfortunately, not, Mr. Reese." He was already on his way out the door. "We have another Number."

"Indeed."

Right as they were leaving, Harold paused as though forgetting something.

Another bullet soon greeted Greer's face.

"You know, I can't hold myself accountable for my actions every time you do something like that, Harold."

"Calm yourself, Mr. Reese. We'll have time to enjoy ourselves later." He paused, still coldly fixated on the gun he just fired. "Furthermore, patience is a necessity. You know as well as I do that the Numbers never stop coming."

...

A/N: And, now that we got the dark!AU out of the way, I can go back to not questioning my life decisions. Have a nice day!