Chapter 43: Heroes and Guides

The light of the moon illuminated the grassy field around Nicholas. The warm summer wind blew through the trees and reeds and out into the starry night. The air was heavy with the weight of a passing storm, the swaying grass a soft rug beneath his skin...

"Which is inconsistent with how it actually feels," Nicholas muttered. Not even bothering to sit up, he decided to perform a quick experiment. He quickly memorized the important details of the blades of grass in front of him, and looked away. Slowly, he returned his gaze to the spot he had memorized.

"I'm in a dream," he concluded, staring at the massive, sunlit rock face which now stretched in front of him. He groaned and stood up awkwardly. "And it's not very convincing."

Well, that was his own brain's fault. And, since he couldn't seem to wake himself up, he decided that he had nothing to lose by taking a little stroll through his sloppily created, lucid dreaming environment.

Nicholas casually strolled up the rock face, counting the icicles that he spotted. They made satisfying musical clinks when he stepped on them. Eventually, he reached the top of the cliff, which he lifted himself over, humming softly.

It was bound to be an interesting night.

-Break-

"We understand that it was a traumatic event. However, we need you to talk, and we need you to talk now. Lives are at stake," said the FBI interrogator, in a tone that was urgent but not unfriendly. Leo looked down and drummed his fingers against the cold metal table, refusing to make any kind of eye contact.

"Sorry, I'm a still a little too shaken to share the details of the encounter. It was all a... bit of a blur," Leo replied, pursing his lips. If the the interrogator was moved by this statement, he did not show it. "Of course, my memory might un-blur itself a bit if you could tell me more about these portals that've been popping up..."

The interrogator coughed. "I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to stop you there. You just admitted, on tape, to withholding evidence. We could throw you in jail right now just for that," he said. Leo smiled easily.

"Well, obviously, but I'm also literally your only eyewitness of the event. Nick has been in a coma for days, and, from what I've heard, he's showing no signs of getting any better," Leo replied. The FBI man's expression remained solid.

"Then I regret to inform you that you have some very unreliable informants. Guide is already showing signs of consciousness," the interrogator replied smugly. Leo allowed his confident expression to break into a nervous one as he reflected on the information he had acquired.

If what the man had said was true, then Nicholas was at least still alive. Leo had been gambling on the interrogator inadvertently revealing some details about Nicholas's condition, if only for some peace of mind on the situation. Now, if he could find out something about the other portals, and keep the knowledge of his portal secret, he'd consider it a successful day.

"Well... I may not be your only eyewitness, but I'm sure as hell your best one. I'm your best— no, your only— shot at getting to the bottom of this quickly, before the public takes notice. You would have just waited for Nick to recover otherwise," Leo said. The interrogator shrugged.

"You're seeing hidden layers where there aren't any. We can cover this up just as we've covered up some... similar instances across the last few days. This is nothing new to us. We're only questioning you because it is procedure," said the interrogator. Leo raised an eyebrow.

"You haven't been all too keen on procedure with the rest of your work. How much evidence do you think you hid before you even looked into treating my friend? Half of it? More?" Leo asked. The FBI man's expression remained utterly indifferent.

"One hundred percent of it, because we aren't paramedics," he replied. Leo remained defiantly silent, eliciting a quiet sigh from the interrogator. "Come on, Leonardo, you can't seriously expect to fight us; my job is to break people like you. Whatever information you have acquired, we have allowed you to acquire, and whatever you're hiding, we will find," said the interrogator. Leo groaned.

"Oh please, I'm not a complete idiot. I am not trying to fight you. That's a fight I would obviously lose. I just want to get a bit of understanding, and maybe some peace of mind, before you toss me aside," said Leo, acting as though he was getting flustered. The interrogator sighed, and rubbed his temples. Did he seriously think he had overstepped his boundaries?

"We aren't trying to be the villains here, though I'm sure we seem like it. The truth is that we're just as confused as you, and we think you can help us. If you comply with us, we won't 'toss you aside.' We just want the best for the world and for the country, same as you," the man said, his tone softening just a bit. Leo narrowed his eyes, and tried to appear unconvinced. In truth, he was more concerned with this sudden new persona, which did not fit well at all. The man was hiding something, but Leo couldn't quite figure it out...

"Why should I care about your intentions? How does that affect me?" Leo asked. The interrogator leaned in closer, and smiled.

"Do as we say, and we'll tell you everything we know about the situation. I myself suspect that you know even more about this than most of my superiors suspect. I think you may have a certain link to these... portals..." he said.

This genuinely unnerved Leo. How did he know anything about the portals? In Leo's experience, only things from Terraria could enter through them. He had tried throwing various objects through, but they simply phased through the portal as if it weren't there.

"What makes you think that?" Leo asked. Under the interrogator's black sunglasses, Leo was starting to recognize a face, and he didn't like it.

"You didn't object or even notice when I called Nicholas "Guide," and you easily killed two demons with a revolver. I think I know just who you are...Hero," the man said, his tone dipping suddenly with the last word. For several tense seconds, the gentle buzz of the tape recorder was the only sound he could hear, until that shut off as well. The two defiant souls blazed on opposite sides of a cold, metal table.

-break-

Nicholas could feel the illusion of rain against his face as he explored his own mind. Or, rather, his minds; He was a man of two minds, now. There was Nicholas, the depressed, broken librarian, who had been utterly overridden by Guide, the adventurous man from Terraria. He wasn't sure exactly how it happened, but Guide could now freely explore what was left of the poor, lesser man's mind.

The Librarian had only kept some of his memories during the merge, and most of them were rather unexciting by Guide's standards. These shattered archives contained scenes of everyday life: scenes of childhood, and of age. They were all wildly different, yet, somehow, exactly the same, if only in one way: Every scene recorded past the age of ten was tainted with loneliness, unhappiness, and boredom. The librarian had been a smart man, but not a sociable man. He was an only child, and he had only ever made a few friends in his life. He was an introvert through all of college, where all those years of library sciences blended together unhappily. When he finally got out of college, he found himself approaching his job with only some dismal regret.

Those were the loneliest days. No one talked much to the Librarian, and he didn't talk to them. Eventually, those days turned into months, and those months blended into years of boredom. The librarian was little more than a robot, wishing he would have gone and become anything else.

Then, one day, a kindred soul entered The Librarian's life. Or, perhaps an opposite soul— either way, the two complemented each other in some strange, unexplainable way. He was just a boy, only about ten years old, but he read books like a college student cramming for exams. This child would always ask The Librarian for recommendations, and sometimes have short conversations with him about books he liked, or, in rare cases, didn't like. This was, depressingly enough, the most conversation that The Librarian had partaken in since sixth grade.

A few years passed, and the conversations grew longer, more analytical. The two grew to know each other as people. The boy always talked of his discontent with ordinary life, and of adventures to be had in the waking world. The Librarian found himself agreeing more and more with this odd boy's philosophy in life. He promised himself that, one day, he would finally go out and do something that he truly loved— what, he was not sure of, but he would do it anyways.

In a few years' time, the librarian had taken the boy on as his intern. His promise to himself remained unfulfilled, but it was always there, like an unstable missile ready to launch at any moment. Unfortunately, The Librarian had lost the launch codes. He admired The Boy for his idealism, but found himself believing less and less in his messages.

Then, one day, everything changed. The memories stopped being created. Everything save one final memory was a blank space.

The boy, now nearly an adult, was preparing for college. He had been acting oddly all day, when he finally pulled The Librarian aside to ask him about "something important."

He asked The Librarian if he should take a gap year to explore the world, and his options, before going back to school. It was a simple enough question, but the substance of it shattered The Librarian's heart. He had once faced the exact same question, and he had chosen incorrectly. A substantial part of him, the part that had been let down, the part that wanted adventure, screamed "YES!" But, the part of him containing his experience and deeply imbedded cynicism told him that the only answer was a small, dismal "no." Exploring the world was unrealistic, and taking a gap year would ruin the boy's chances at getting a half decent job. But, not taking it could ruin the adventurous, malleable soul possessed by this boy; the soul of a Hero.

Such a small question, such a big choice. The Librarian never found the answer to it, for everything past that moment was little more than a blur of robotic activity.

"Yes!" said Guide, smiling wildly, "you can do it!" The Librarian cast his eyes downward, and frowned. He looked miserable, as always. "No," said the Librarian, shaking his head, "no, you cannot."

-Break-

Trying very hard not to be paralyzed, Leo put the pieces together in his head. What a twist! What a cruel, demented way for the universe to screw with his life! He let out a shuddery sigh.

"So, I guessed right," the man said, smiling slyly. "But, do you know who I am? I think that you're smart enough to guess."

"I think I have an idea," Leo muttered. If the man stepped close enough, Leo could head-butt him, and grab at the gun he probably kept in his coat...

"Well, spit it out. Who am I?" The man asked, circling behind Leo's chair. It was amazing how quickly and fluidly he got up and crossed the room.

"You're Atticus. I killed you back in Terraria- I should have expected that you'd come back," Leo said, readying himself for the attack. Atticus definitely had a gun in his pocket, but if Leo could grab it, it would instantly end the fight...

"Wrong. I am not Atticus— just as you are not really Hero," he said, pointedly but not aggressively. The man pulled of his glasses, and sighed. "No, I am the man that Atticus left behind when he came to Terraria, just as you left behind Leo when you became Hero. And, let me tell you, I do not like the man that I became," Atticus said. He patted Leo on the shoulder, and returned to his post behind his desk. Leo shakily released his breath, which he only just realized he had been holding.

"It seems that freedom to do anything without any sort of consequence brings out the worst in me. When Atticus died, part of him came back from Terraria— enough of him, it seems, for me to realize that I did not want to merge with him when he came back for good. This was a part of me that I could do without." Atticus said, taking long, thoughtful a sip from the yet-untouched coffee mug on his desk. Leo waited in polite silence. "Mm. Good stuff. Anyway, just one day after I received one part of him, the rest came swooping down upon me when Atticus had his brain removed in Terraria. My attempts to resist the merge resulted in a complete takeover of my body. I could only watch as this... demented version of me used my body to search tirelessly for a way back into Terraria."

"Cut to the chase. How did you end up as yourself again?" Hero asked, regaining enough confidence to put Atticus on the defensive. Atticus glared at him.

"I was getting there, insolent child. It seems that the demons that Atticus had dealt with in Terraria were opening portals near his— or, as it might be, my— Earth location. The FBI discovered most of them before Atticus did. They put these portals on lockdown, and attempted to question Atticus about his discovery. However, after Atticus ditched his GPS location device, he was able to sneak away from the rest of the investigative body and find a freshly opened, unmonitored portal. Before my colleagues in the FBI could question where he had gone, he had walked into the portal, bringing his soul back into the world, and shoving me behind to process what had just happened," explained Atticus. Leo nodded thoughtfully.

"Huh. That all makes a surprising amount of sense," said Leo, trailing off. Atticus smiled dreadfully.

"It is the truth, as far as my mind can envision it," he replied. Leo's face suddenly grew somber.

"Yes, it makes so much sense, in fact, that I almost overlooked the fact that you're being suspiciously nice for a man who went insane and started killing everything by day two of the "Terraria Experience." What's the deal there?" Leo asked, starting to stand up. Atticus ushered for him to sit.

"I am an extremely high-functioning sociopath, as you could have inferred from any number of the obvious facades I presented you in my attempt to find the one that clicked. I am only being gentle and sociable for your sake," he replied, subtly avoiding Leo's eyes. He paused for a moment, as if to think. "When I am isolated from society, it is surprisingly easy to kill things which annoy me. I cannot claim to fully understand the thought process which led Atticus to madness, but I believe it started with a contempt for the idiots here on Earth, and devolved into a bloodlust. Does this answer satisfy you?" Atticus asked. Leo simply shrugged in response.

"I'll take it. It's more information than I was bargaining for," said Leo. Atticus let out a brief, tortured laugh.

"Yes, we always seem to get more than we bargain for. Don't we, Hero?" he asked, his expression distant. Leo coughed, snapping Atticus out of his daze. "Ah. Of course. Now, I am prepared to set you free, and turn you loose on Terraria. I will lose nothing by doing so. However, I do have a condition which I will need you to satisfy while you are there," Atticus said, checking to make sure the tape recorder was still off.

"What would that be?" Leo asked. Atticus leaned back in his chair, and donned his sunglasses.

"I need you to kill Atticus. For good, this time," Atticus said coldly, "and, before you ask, yes, I can make sure that you uphold your part of the bargain." Leo raised an eyebrow.

"Care to elaborate?" He asked. Atticus remained stolid. Leo could find no shred of emotion behind his cold, black glasses.

"Your body will fall into our care while you are in Terraria. We will keep it unconscious, so it does not develop its own personality, and so that the merge is as painless as possible when you return," explained Atticus. He paused for a moment, presumably to let Leo think. "But, if I ever feel Atticus beginning to return, I will set off a contingency which will destroy your body here."

Leo was not phased. There had to be more to this deal, and he wanted to find it out.

"So what? All that would mean was that I couldn't return to this world. I'd still be alive in Terraria," Leo said. Atticus nodded stiffly.

"Indeed. We would also kill Nicholas, and another one of your friends who is not yet involved in this little... mess of ours," Atticus said calmly. Leo grew wide eyed.

"Do you mean to say that Neptune is alive here?" Leo asked. Atticus nodded.

"She is in the minority, but yes, she is alive and well in this world. When Atticus took over my body, I was able to passively browse his memories and combine our intellect. I found some... fascinating experiments which he ran, involving the souls of other heroes. I memorized the names and looks of every one of these "players" who Atticus had encountered in the dungeon." Leo bit his lip.

"Spare me the details and move on, please," Leo said. Atticus sighed.

"...Of course. When I finally regained control of my body, I put their names into our database, and I found that a vast majority of them were deceased citizens of various countries. These were the players who had seemingly no memories of the time before Terraria, save for fleeting bits of personality and knowledge. Guide might have told you about Curie, for example, a paramedic who died just a week ago in the real world. When she died here, her soul was damaged, but not destroyed, and soon found its way into Terraria. When she finally died in Terraria too, Atticus found no soul in her fragile corpse. I believe that this is because she was now dead in both worlds; her energy had been stretched too thin, and had finally snapped." Atticus took a moment to behold Leo. He smiled, and gestured towards him.

"But you, Nicholas, Neptune and I never died in the real world. Some other event, some deep conflict within yourself, must have brought you to Terraria." Atticus paused, and his tone became more thoughtful and subdued.

"Each day on Earth is equivalent to about a month in Terraria, as I'm sure you've discovered during this conversation. So, it stands to reason that something which happened at least two weeks ago put Nicholas, the reclusive, unmarried librarian, into Terraria, where he manifested as a smart, passionate young man, ready to start over. He had no memories of the previous world, only a vague concept of knowledge, and the possession of it. Something in Nicholas's life made him wish for the days when he was Guide in the real world too; it made him wish so hard, in fact, that his soul was split in two. Part of it must have stayed here, presumably carrying out his work as a librarian, performing each task as if he were a robot. But, the adventurous part of his soul, the part that is "Guide," went for a little hike in Terraria. My examination makes me believe that, upon his untimely return, "Guide" destroyed what was left of Nicholas the librarian, who had little will to live without his adventurous half. If Guide has been depressed lately, it is because of the chemical imbalance left over from the librarian— the only thing that Guide inherited when he moved back into his old body."

"Neptune, on the other hand, had been in a vegetative state for several months, before miraculously waking up upon her demise in Terraria. I won't dwell too much on her, but she is of much interest to me. I believe that she was one of the first Terrarians— in fact, it could have been the split in her soul which created Terraria in the first place. I have some other suspects, but she is rather high up on the list," Atticus said, finishing off his coffee mug. He casually discarded it on the floor, where it broke with a resounding crash. Leo tried desperately not to jump as the noisy little bits of ceramic bounced across the floor.

"Which brings us to you. I don't know how you came to Terraria; frankly, I don't care, since you were only there for a very short while. But, as I said before, I need you in Terraria again," Atticus said. He scratched his chin thoughtfully. "Now, I have very limited power in this situation. I can let you go, but, after that, getting to Terraria is up to you. So, I'd like to ask, while I still have the chance: What's your plan? How are you going to get back before the FBI can stop you?"

Leo grinned. He'd been waiting for a while to answer this one. "I've seen the map of portals that you FBI people keep. The one that was hanging on the wall, in the other room, you know? It was really stupid of you to keep it hanging up like that, actually. I mean, you could have had the same thing on a computer, and that way I wouldn't—" Leo started.

"Yes, I'm sure you're very proud of yourself. What's your plan?" Atticus interrupted. Leo continued as though he hadn't spoken.

"Anyways, the portal that I first stumbled across wasn't on there last I checked, and I'd assume that this is still the case. I can probably make it there with Nick before sunrise," he said, already shifting as if to stand up. Atticus motioned for him to sit.

"One more moment. How will you take Nicholas? How do you plan to get from here to there?" Atticus asked. Leo shrugged.

"I don't know. I'm Hero, I'll think of something as I go."

Atticus did nothing to stop Leo as he stood up, and thus was too late to react when Leo snatched the tape recorder off the table and smashed it on the ground. Atticus watched with dull amusement as Leo ground the shattered pieces of the tape into the tiled floor with his shoe, before walking hastily towards the door.