Hey guys! Long time so see! *laughs nervously* It's been too freaking long! I have missed you guys. Anyway, I'm not certain how much I will be able to update. I have a bunch of one-shot ideas, chapters to write, stories to start up, and stories to edit. And on top of that I am in my last year of high school so things are just going to get more hectic from here. At least I don't have much of a social life so you guys can relish in the fact that I am pathetic.


Due to this, if anyone wishes to be a beta author for me. (for some reason I prioritize beta-ing other peoples stories before editing my own, just PM me. You will have access to all stories of mine that aren't one-shots.)

Anyway, I went to camp, and that was fun. Unfortunately, I had to deal with stupid people there. See, we had two girls named Abby, one named Addie (short for Addison) and an Ali. Of course, since most people tend to call me Ari as Arsinoё is a mouthful, I bet you can guess how that went. (Ali looks a lot like me too, so people got confused. She's a close friend of mine, and one of the Abby's too) My cousin Joseph was there and we spent most of our time there getting high (inside joke. There was no drugs involved. Just swings) and making fun of people while getting high(on the swings)

Okay, so I haven't had a lot of people up my ass either! Yay! (As in, I got away from the losers I live with for a month. Seriously the moment I got back I ended up in tears within the first half-hour. See, I'd forgotten their ability to make everything in the world my fault, so I pissed a few members off and then they told me that I was a self, inconsiderate bitch who was a disrespectful brat who gets a kick out of pissing people off, none of which is true.) And I also learned about the difference between my birth mom and my stepmom. See my birth mom doesn't mind gays, and she has some trans friends. She's biphobic though, however, despite that she doesn't try to pretend that I'm not openly bi. My stepmom is like, "You should get a boyfriend" my twin sister "When you get a boyfriend" everyone on my stepmom's side "Boyfriend"

My mom, despite the fact that she believes that I'm just going through a phase. (WTF? How is my sexual orientation a phase?) She as least adds "or girlfriend" to it. Same with my older sister Andrea. (She doesn't think I'm going through a phase though)

Bӕ dearest though… she's pissing me off. See, she and me and Andrea were sitting there listening to our uncle talking to one of his friends about how they think that this one guy is gay and she turns to me and goes, "You see?" And I'm like "Huh?" And Andrea is confused and so am I and Bӕ explains what she means and goes "She keeps posting all this stuff about gay rights and stuff onto Facebook and gets mad whenever she gets asked whether she's gay" Bullshit! Only one has ever asked that and she was bi too and plenty of my friends on Facebook post things about gay rights. I did get angry once when I was still in the closet about it. (Honestly there would never have been a closet to step into if It wasn't for my stepmom and her homophobic ways. Seriously she tried to ban us from listening to I Kissed A Girl when it first came out because it would encourage people to be gay. So stupid…) That was only because my stepmom told me in a condescending tone that people would think that I was a lesbian because of the fact I posted things about gay rights and had random photos of girls as my profile photos. Actually that was because I had severe self-esteem issues and I didn't think any photos of me that I had were good enough. One of my friends named Seth was like, "Yay! Another person with untrue profile pic" He was Russian and kind of crazy. (He seriously was Russian though I forget that a lot because he acted so American. By that I mean that there was NO cultural barrier though he did have an accent.)

The ironic part is that the only reason I'm living with my dad is because my mother practically handed me over to him and said, "You deal with it! I don't like this kid" Huh…

Anyway, I don't say much about mother's side to you guys because I rarely ever see them so I'm going to remedy that as I have spent a month around them.


This is what they are like:

Masen (my half-brother): Are you using this? *holds up piece of paper*

Me: No *fails to mention that my step-dad ripped it out of one of Masen's notebooks and gave it to me to write fanfiction ideas on*

Masen: Yay! *Starts to make out with it*

Me: Is that your boyfriend?

Masen: Yeah.

Me: *thinking* I KNEW HE WAS GAY!

I turn to my step-brother Cameron: Apparently, it's his boyfriend

My stepbrother mumbled something incoherent like: More like it's his husband. Anything less and he'd be raping that thing (I'm not sure if that's what he said. It sounded like this) *He says this without looking up from his game. He is playing Batman: Arkham City*

Me: * Turns to look at my brother* He is now making out with the paper while humping the bed. I groan, because it is my bed.

Masen: I'm having sex with a piece of paper

Me: I'm not sleeping here tonight *Shudders*

Masen: Hands me the paper

Me: Grabs on the edge and slowly takes it from him with a disgusted look on my face

Him: *sounding panicked* No! Give me back my boyfriend!

Me: *giggles* give it back

Him: Shoves it down the back of his underwear and sits down*

Me: *thinking* OMG he's not even nine yet!

*Me, Masen, and Cameron enter the kitchen where my mother is making bacon and cheddar cheeseburgers, the cheddar being inside of the burger

Masen: The burgers look burnt

Me: Why do they look so weird?

Mother: They are bacon and cheddar honey

We turn to some lemonade my mother made which is mixed with berries

Me: It looks like applesauce

Masen: Melted applesauce

This is a true story. My mother's family is full of weirdoes


On more relevant things: What do you guys think of my new cover? Or did you guys like the old one with the Milk of Awesomeness insignia on it? I used to have time to do my own covers, but I've slacked on it so I had to go add more covers to everything. Also, I did several mary-sue test on Milky and

Mary-Sue universal litmus test: 117

Writer's Mary Sue Test: 66

test: 87


47. Annabeth tells you about her deeply hidden love for Nico.

Setting: The House of Hades

AU: Yes. Definitely. Shockingly though, the characters are at least half-way decently in character.

Pairings: Percobeth (Onesided! Percabeth Onesided!Nicobeth Onesided!Percico) Mileo if you take me seriously(I wouldn't)


"Doing things the awesome way! The awesome way! Doing things the awesome way!" Milky randomly said one day. Or, more accurately, belted at the top of her lungs. She did it, most likely, because how else would you start a story after not updating for more than a month. Everyone knows that musicals are the best way to start a story.

Or wait. Was it really a month? Milky opened her fanfiction account up, still singing like an idiot. Yep. Last update: May 7th. Not her fault though.

"Will you shut up?" Jason yelled. "Your singing voice is annoying. Wait. Why are you even on the ship anyway?"

"I'm your eighth quest member and I'm here to fall in love with Leo like all the other sues! Despite being a Hunter. But that's okay, because Artemis lets me be an exception!"

"Yes!" Leo yelled from where he was trying to fix an issue with the ship. "All da ladies luv Leo!"

"Whoa! Whoa!" Annabeth yelled. "Leo! Talk in perfect grammar. No one likes an idiot. Not even Milky and she's one too." Silence followed. Annabeth made a triumphant face.

That taken care of, Jason and Annabeth turned back to deal with Milky-Sue. Jason shrugged. "Well, carry on then."

Annabeth nodded. "That makes logical sense. You are a Sue after all, according to these tests."

"Wait." Milky said. "What tests?"

Annabeth shoved her laptop in front of Milky so she could see it. Wait. Didn't Annabeth just lose her laptop in Tartarus? How does she have it? Logic must have stayed down there to sacrifice its self to Tartarus too! Oh, wait. Too soon? Oooh, Sorry. Milky, despite being a fangirl herself, isn't very tactful when it comes to feels. Stupid bitch.

Piper wandered into the room where her boyfriend was talking with Annabeth and the ship's new village idiot. Sorry, Percy. We have a new kelp-for-brains in town! She was cooler though. Of course she was. She was a Mary-Sue. But wait, wasn't she a Hunter? Why was she trying to fall in love with Leo? Besides, even if she wanted to break her vows? Why Leo?

Like, for one, he's kind of annoying. And she was not! (Shh. Just let her believe it) For two, he looks like an elf, and everyone knows that looks are the most important thing in a relationship. Forget romance! It's all about being superficial.

And the most important part is he shares a name with a kid that she used to have a crush on and that's even more taboo than the Hunter thing.

Duh.

Piper rubbed her head. "I was woken up by the most annoying song I have ever heard. It sounded like Milky trying to make a parody of "The Ally Way" while making dumb puns off her last name."

"It was," Leo yelled, somehow hearing her. "It sounded hot."

"Oh no." Annabeth said. "He's catching Unawesomeitis."

Don't encourage her." Jason yelled down at Leo. Leo flipped him off from wherever he was. Despite the fact that he wasn't in Jason's view of sight, Jason returned the favor and told him where he could put that finger.

"How did you even see that?" Leo questioned.

"Uh… internet?"

"Oh, that makes sense."

Yes, Leo. Yes, it does.

Percy walked into the room. Annabeth tensed. Piper shot blue pancakes at him using her horn. She didn't even need to ask what he wanted. Perfect logic.

Percy caught the pancakes in one hand and the maple syrup that followed with the other. The pancakes, despite not being on a plate, were in a nice stack of three and unsmushed. Yes, Percy really was that talented.

He sent her a thumbs-up in appreciation and sat down next to Annabeth, who groaned.

"Go away, Percy!" Milky yelled. "No likes you. There's only enough room for one Sue in this story and that's me!"

"How am I a Sue?"

"You are the biggest Gary Stu ever! I mean really? You defeated the God of War at twelve years old! All of the girls think you're hot, and some of the guys too." She exchanged looks with Jason and nodded, somehow knowing all about Croatia… oh, wait… Sue! Duh!

"Don't you dare turn this around on me!" Percy yelled. "You're just jealous that Annabeth is better than you."

Annabeth and Piper stifled their laughter, though Annabeth still seemed tense. Milky shrugged it off. She was still the Sue of this story and she was the best Sue ever. None of the other girls mattered! Not even Hazel, who had yet to make an appearance.

Which reminded Milky… "Hey, what's going on?" Hazel walked in, carrying a rat on one shoulder that everyone automatically assumed was Frank.

"Milky has randomly appeared. Nothing out of the ordinary."

"Why is Frank a rat?" Questioned Leo. "There are so many cooler things that he could be."

"Rat?" Hazel questioned. "Oh, this isn't Frank. I found it in my room. This is Frank." She turned giving them a view of the baby behind her.

"Oh great!" Yelled Jason. "It's the cliché turning-into-babies fanfiction plot! I don't want anything to do with this, Superman out!" He flew out of the ship in superhero fashion, an arm raised heroically.

"Take me with you!" Squealed Piper, not wanting to stay with the Mary-Sue and the Writing Cliché, because Milk of Awesomeness here has given up on keeping the fourth wall intact. ДЯЭЦЛФЭ what's wrong with you. Okay, that's it. No more typing at 2:30 in the morning. Evidently, Real-Life Milky has forgotten how to spell her own name. Arsinoӛ?Arsinoӭ? Arsinoӫ? Hmmm… that one's close. Arsinoӗ? Not quite. Arsinoê? Arsinoȅ? Closer? ArsinoË? Grammatically wrong, but almost there. Ah, that's right. Arsinoë. Well, fanfic authors should know how to spell their own name!

A "shut up, Milky" came from the other side of the fourth wall, demolished as it was. A hazy girl a few years older than Milky stood in the rubble, looking annoyed, her black Converse kicking at random rocks.

"What the Hades?" Milky muttered, raising an eyebrow. So creepy! Like di Vinci's baby! Cookies to whoever gets that reference.

On Milky and Annabeth's turn to watch baby Frank, Annabeth turned to Milky nervously. "If I tell you something do you promise not to tell anyone, especially not Nico?"

Whatever Annabeth needed to not tell Nico must have been important, Milky figured, and decided to listen. "What is it, Annabeth?"

"I'm… not in love with Percy. I know he likes me, but I like Nico. What do you want me to do? I think Nico likes me too. He's always glaring at Percy."

It's not Percy he's glaring at, honey, Milky thought to herself, but said nothing. She didn't want to dash Annabeth's dreams of having her own personal son of Hades to order around.

But she thought it was funny. Percy was in love with Annabeth, who was secretly in love with Nico, who had a crush on Percy, who unfortunately, could care less.

Aphrodite must be loving this.


Anyway, I'm already working on the next one. I swear to you guys that the past month won't happen agian