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Stardate 55017.8 Personal Log Entry, Cadet Icheb (soon to be, Hansen!)

We've returned from Sweden. The visit was great, but we're both very glad to be home. Chakotay was waiting for us in the transporter room to welcome us back. Seven left the transporter room with him. I went to the quarters I'd shared which, at this point, are just mine. Freddie Bristow is in Seattle with his family. When we last spoke, he's reconsidering his career as a Starfleet officer. "I think I've done enough space traveling in the last seven years to last me a lifetime."

As soon as I tossed my luggage on my bunk, I checked on everyone else to find out who was still around. Forty-seven members of the crew remain on board. Almost all of them are Maquis or Equinox crew members, but the captain hasn't been released yet either. She's enduring interview after interview. By the time she's allowed to finally leave the ship, I think every single admiral, captain, or department head assigned to Starfleet Command Headquarters will have grilled her about everything that happened in the Delta Quadrant. It may take her seven years to relate all they want to know before her inquisitors are satisfied.

Tom and B'Elanna are here, but they don't have any duties. They're officially on parental leave, caring for Miral (who's even cuter now than she was when I first saw her). With Voyager in orbit around Earth, there wouldn't be much for Tom to do even if he were at the helm. B'Elanna is waiting for the decision on the Maquis. Tom's free to go off the ship whenever he wants, but he won't leave Voyager anytime soon. He's spending time with his family. Tom's Out-Mate Review Board Hearing took place a few days ago. He's been officially released from the Federation Penal Settlement in New Zealand because of "time served." Since he was "on parole" with Captain Janeway on Voyager for twice as long as his sentence, that's not a surprise!

He hasn't heard whether he'll be able to continue serving in Starfleet, though. His discharge from the service after he failed to admit his fault in the accident at Caldik Prime normally would prevent that. "If I can't stay in, I'll look into revising some of my holodeck programs for publication. If the Doc can be a published author, so can I!" It's likely he'll only continue to be Lieutenant Paris if he receives a pardon expunging his general discharge after Caldik Prime. That may happen if the Maquis are also pardoned for their military actions against the Cardassians. I hope so.

Naomi and her mother are visiting Sam's cousin in Toronto. Greskrendtregk hasn't arrived yet from Deep Space Nine. He decided to accept a promotional position and stay there long-term. He assumed that when his wife and daughter returned to this quadrant, Voyager's first stop would be at their last port of call before heading out to the Badlands. He had a little trouble arranging for as much leave time as he desired (hard to imagine, in such a unique situation), but he's expected to arrive on Earth any day now.

Commander Tuvok and T'Pel are still in residence, as is their daughter; but his sons and the rest of the family have returned to Vulcan. When I went to visit the Doctor in Sickbay to tell him about our trip to Sweden, Asil was with him. She was describing the work she does with her mother, which is the creation of devices to help those with medical challenges live independently. Asil is extremely pretty - I became a little tongue-tied once again when I first saw her. After we'd spoken together for a few minutes, though, I got over my nervousness and enjoyed our conversation. She's very nice, and just as smart as I would expect any of Tuvok's children to be. When I mentioned my genetic research, she asked me if I would be willing to share a little of it with her. From the wording of her request, it was clear she already knew something about it.

We went to the lab adjacent to Sickbay. I showed her my genome, pointing out the alterations my parents had made to it to turn me into a neurolytic pathogen-producing organism. She comprehended the ramifications so quickly, I asked her if she was familiar with my work because she'd performed a mind-meld with her father. She explained she hadn't - yet. She'll have to soon, once he's cleared to return to Vulcan. Since her mind is the most compatible with her father's of anyone in the family, she'll be performing the actual healing procedures. Asil admits she's "not looking forward to it," but she is determined to help him recover.

Since she was a little girl, Asil has been able to read her father's surface thoughts, especially when he gets agitated. This is happening more and more frequently. T'Pel can keep him focused and control his distractibility, but Asil is uniquely qualified to provide the actual therapy, under the guidance of monks at a temple dedicated to healing. She said her father has a relatively obscure condition called "fal-tor-voh." It occurs in Vulcans who have suffered brain damage, either through physical injuries or from performing mind melds with those afflicted by very serious psychological disorders. The Doctor wasn't around when she told me that. I'm not sure he would have approved if he was, since he's always so careful to maintain patient confidentiality. However, I know what happened to her father during the Unimatrix Zero incident, and that Dr. Kadan's "therapy" on Quarra was also very damaging to him. Through my study of the ship's logs, I learned of other incidents which may have contributed to this illness. Seven years in the Delta Quadrant was not kind to Commander Tuvok's mental health.

Despite the seriousness of our subject, I enjoyed our discussion. Asil told me my work was "fascinating." That's something a Vulcan often says in place of "exciting." We spent a very pleasant hour in the lab, until she had to leave. Her mother contacted her at that point and asked her to stay with her father while T'Pel attended a meeting at Starfleet Medical. After Asil left, the EMH called me into Sickbay to tell him "everything" about the visit to Scandinavia. I did my best. I'm sure he grilled Seven afterwards anyway. Seven's father isn't the only one who insists on learning every last tidbit of a subject that interests him.

That reminds me. I asked Seven if she wished me to call her Annika. She told me I could continue to call her Seven if I wished. "You're my son. If you wish to call me Mommy, I won't mind." I told her I thought I might be a little old for that one. After all this time, it will be hard to call her anything other than Seven, so that's what I'll stick with. She's fine with that.

We'll be going to court the day after tomorrow. We may not be required to appear in person. If we'd still been traveling in the Delta Quadrant, the hearing would have gone on without us. However, I think I'd like to observe the process. Mrs. Yuhl told us we're welcome to attend, so both of us will be there. I'm excited. Or maybe I'm "fascinated."

I think it sounds better when Asil says it.

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Personal Log Addendum

While I was visiting with Tom and B'Elanna, I finally had a chance to ask him why he was so moved during the captain's speech, when she told us about the parade and the rest of the activities scheduled for our first days back. He knew what I was asking him about. When the captain suggested we could share an anecdote about someone who wasn't with us anymore, when an outsider got too pushy about something we didn't feel like talking about, he thought of all of our lost ones, especially, Joe Carey. "And I thought of one other person, too. Lieutenant Stadi died at her post when the Caretaker pulled Voyager into the Delta Quadrant. I became Voyager's chief helmsman because she was gone. Stadi was Betazoid. She had the sort of captain-to-helmsman rapport that's hard for a mere human to match. She was a nice person, too. I wouldn't be where I am now if she'd survived, but I wish she had. You know what I mean?"

B'Elanna remarked, "I'm sure you would have been on her staff, just not the main guy. Hey, maybe you'd have married her instead of me!"

"NEVER!" Tom retorted, putting his arm around her and giving her a quick kiss on the cheek. And then he leaned over towards me and said, in what I've heard is called a stage whisper, "I couldn't! She'd have been my boss!" B'Elanna laughed out loud when she heard that, but it made me think of the captain's situation in the Delta Quadrant with Commander Chakotay. She was his boss, too. And neither of them ever forgot it, either.

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Stardate 55019.8 Personal Log Entry, Cadet Icheb (Hansen, as of tomorrow!)

Seven and I were gathering some possessions I'd left behind in Borg Central when I moved in with Freddie. After the court hearing tomorrow, I'll move to a dorm room on the Academy campus. The new semester starts next Monday. While I was there, Marla and Noah came into Cargo Bay Two to "borrow" a few crates in which to pack their belongings. "Are you being allowed to leave Voyager?" I asked Noah.

"You could say that," he said. His laughter sounded very bitter.

Marla finished his thought. "Our Board of Inquiry hearings are over. There aren't going to be any courts martial for us, but . . ."

The Equinox people were told they would not face trials as long as they all resigned immediately from Starfleet. Because of pressure from the Ransom and Burke families to obtain citations for "bravery and services to the Federation" for the deceased captain and executive officer (Noah and the others get sick even thinking about that possibility), the Admiralty has permanently classified the ship and its missions top secret. If the Five are court martialed, everything that happened on "that ship," including the murder of aliens to turn them into fuel, is bound to get out. This would be a major public relations disaster for Starfleet, which is still reeling from some of the events which occurred during the Dominion War. The Five were told if they resigned, they would receive the same benefits the rest of the Starfleet crew will receive, according to the length of time they'd served and the rank achieved as of this date (which means Marla and Noah would be considered crewmen, not ensigns, the rank they'd both held on Equinox). They won't receive dishonorable discharges, but they can't be honest about the true reason they left Starfleet to anyone. Ever. And we can't say anything about this to anyone, either. If the secret is exposed, the Five could still face murder charges because, as Tom later explained to me, there's no statute of limitations on that crime.

The captain announced the decision this evening to everyone still in residence on Voyager. The crew who are currently off ship will receive personal visits from security staff people, who will explain everything to them, too. Marla didn't seem very upset. "It'll work out okay," she said. "I think I'd prefer to live on Earth from now on anyway." Marla and Aimee will stay with Marla's sister until she finds a job and things settle down for them. Noah agreed it was the best they could hope for, since none of them will be imprisoned. Noah also plans to stay on Earth. Without a conviction on his record, he'll qualify for jobs which require a security clearance. Jim Morrow, Brian Sofin, and Angelo Tessoni have all said they plan to ship out on commercial vehicles. They'll be "employable," too, which they might not be as convicted felons, even if their sentences were commuted to "time served," like Tom's was.

All of them will leave the ship today as ordered. We may still see them at some of the welcome home celebrations planned for the crew, however. When I spoke to Tom about it afterwards, he said, rather cynically, "They'll be allowed to come to the parties, if only to maintain the fiction their resignations were voluntary. Sorry, but it sucks, big time."

He's right. It does.

I wonder if this indicates what the "disposition" of the Maquis crew will be as well. I hope not.

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