#44 Two roads
If anyone ever found out about them, and then asked her, she wouldn't know what to say.
'Which one do you love more?'
Once upon a time she would have blurted out 'Light-kun!' without hesitation.
And after Light had told her to stop bothering her, she would have happily cooed out 'Ryuzaki-san' while shooting a cruel look at Light.
But the bottom line was that she could never pick between them.
Light was conventionally handsome, bright and a charmer. He could take her out to theme parks and dancing and to beaches and she would feel like a helplessly happy teen girl, just how she looked.
Ryuzaki was dark and deep, and looked messy even when he'd made an effort to tidy himself. He wouldn't take her out, but he'd happily stay in with her, watching movies, reading, and trying to teach her chess. He had the patience of a saint when it came to her. He could make her feel like a lady.
How ironic then, that she considered Light to be the darker of the two. Light was darkness and temptation; Ryuzaki was goodness and calm.
She let out a low sigh.
"Something is troubling Misa?"
"You okay, Misa?"
She smiled faintly.
They were sitting so comfortably, in her room. The cameras, she had been assured the moment her boyfriends entered, were off.
After the debauchery that had taken place, none of the three had bothered to dress fully. L was on her sofa, laying full-length, in his baggy jeans only. Light was on the floor, leaning against the sofa, head resting on one of L's bent knees. He was in his boxer shorts.
Misa herself was also on the floor, her head tilted back on L's stomach, using him as a cushion. She almost smiled at her own clothing. Her black lace underwear and Ryuzaki's discarded with shirt, pulled on over the erotic lace.
It was showing through the thin cotton, but she didn't care, it was soft and warm and smelled of strawberries, and Light wouldn't lend her his clothes.
"Misa was wondering which boyfriend she loves the most." She confessed.
Light snorted, "Oh, you'll hurt Ryuzaki's feelings." He commented, leaning over and pecking her cheek.
L frowned a little, "What makes Light-kun so sure she would pick him?"
Light shrugged calmly, "Well come on, Ryuzaki, look at me, then look at you."
L's brow knitted with annoyance. "It is now 40 percent. And Misa-chan has said before that I'm cute." He lowered one hand to pet the girl's long blonde hair. "Besides, I'm nicer to Misa."
Misa giggled and blushed a little, they always argued like this, and she had to admit it was very funny at times. "Well…"
Light's caramel eyes widened. "Hey! I'm nice to her!"
L smirked. "Light-kun doesn't let her hug him after we sleep together."
Misa nodded.
That was another unexpected thing she'd discovered. Light seemed to dislike contact unless it was leading somewhere more heated, whereas Ryuzaki, after a tense moment or two, welcomed hugs and kisses that were just given out of kindness, not heat.
"That's because we're always sweaty and gross!!" the student snapped. "Anyway, you don't take her out as much as I do!"
"I still spend about 60 percent more time with her than Light-kun."
Misa sighed, drifting out of the argument and daydreaming.
If anyone ever found out, and circumstances forced her to choose…
Who would she choose?
Of course, she owed Light so very, very much…
But Ryuzaki was so much more than he appeared to be.
Oh, she knew the answer really; she loved them both equally, for different things. Between them they were the perfect boyfriend in two parts.
But choose?
She couldn't choose.
She could never, ever decide between them.
When she was with Light, she ached for Ryuzaki, when she was with the dark-haired man, her heart cried out for Light.
She frowned to herself, and they noticed at once.
"…Don't get upset, Misa, you know we don't mean it." Light said comfortingly, patting her arm.
Misa shook her head, "No, it's all right, Misa doesn't mind you fighting, it's only silly anyway." She sighed, "The thing is that Misa can't possibly decide. Misa loves both her boyfriends very much." She looked up at them both, her blue eyes shimmering.
The reaction was, as always, instant.
Arms curled around her from the sides, tan and porcelain.
"Mmm…" she purred, taking in their twin scents, strawberries and sugar, ink and cologne.
"This isn't a multiple-choice question, Misa." Light muttered faintly, his face in her hair.
"Indeed. Misa can have her cake and eat it too, so to speak." His voice was muffled from his burying of his face in her shoulder.
She giggled. "Ok… Misa won't worry anymore."
That night, though, when she slept between their bodies, she dreamt.
She dreamt of being at a cross-road, and on either road, stood either man.
One road lead to darkness.
The other lead to light.
And when they offered their hands, she simply couldn't choose.
