It was strange to be in Athens and not have any obligations. For the first time, Hephaistion was living the life most nobles lived: a life of pleasure, without work, as political as he felt like being. The days he spent organising his possessions for the move to Macedon, the afternoons he devoted to his godchildren and the nights he gave to his friends. Every week they were riding up to the estate or out to the coast on the sunnier autumn days. It was peaceful and a relaxed goodbye to the city.

"Gaius is so nervous for his maths test tomorrow,"Lucius said to his godparents and sister as they walked through a park on their way to Agrippa's house, which Eudoxia now lived in with her husband and son."I mean, he is even spending the afternoon with Agreus to study."

"Maths doesn't come as easily to everyone as it comes to you, Lucius,"Eudoxia said patiently.

"No,"Hephaistion smiled."I was just as nervous as Gaius. I had to work so hard on it."

Inside the house, Lucius raced upstairs to his room to fetch his book while the others sat down in a lounge.

"Have you decided when you're leaving, Hephaistion?"Juliana asked stoically.

The children had been the most difficult to tell of his decision. At first he had told them what he had told everyone besides his parents, sisters and friends: simply that he was resigning and considering moving to Macedon. Eudoxia had been understanding; as he'd said to her, he would never have been able to leave if she hadn't been supportive. Once he'd talked it over with her, he had told the children. They had not taken it well and he knew that Lucius was still firmly trying to change his mind.

Juliana, on the other hand, had taken it best. They were firm friends and her most important influences would always be Laconike and Eudoxia. Hephaistion smiled sadly,"Not quite, yet. There isn't really a rush, though hopefully by the end of the month."

Eudoxia sat down, her face alight as the nurse brought her her baby son. She had given birth while Hephaistion had been in Macedon and she and her husband had made him godfather. Juliana walked over to look down on the tiny baby, "He's very useless, you know, Eudoxia."

Eudoxia rolled her eyes and looked indignant while Hephaistion met Juliana's eyes laughingly, agreeing with her perfectly.

Lucius returned with his book and also with his younger siblings, his patience increasingly turning to exasperation as they asked him to play with them.

Agrippina, six years old, with big, precocious eyes was trying to bribe him,"I'll give you my biscuits if you play!"

"I don't want your biscuits,"Lucius said. He picked a biscuit off a plate on the table. "See? I can get my own biscuits."

"I'll let you play Achilles!"Marcus squealed. He was five years old and enthralled by the tales of the heroes.

Lucius, though, was eleven years old and had never been particularly close with his little siblings. He refused and opened his scroll to show Juliana something.

Marcus was threatening to have a tantrum. Hephaistion spoke up quickly,"Come here, I'll play with you."

He had grown to trust Hephaistion and came readily to sit on his lap while Agrippina ran off to fetch the toys. His concepts of time and distance were still a little hazy and the biggest emotion he felt over his godfather's departure was confusion. Hephaistion kissed his head, surrounded by the smell only children had, of dirt and soap, of oils and grass unmarred by sweat.


Hephaistion was determined to be the best godfather he could in the last few weeks living in Athens. Accordingly, he went to fetch Gaius from school the next day and take him shopping in the agora after his horrible test.

Gaius was thirteen but very serious. His parents had died just two years apart and the time in between had been tumultuous. Since Hephaistion had returned on their grandfather's death, they'd been extremely close and he was unhappy to lose the man who was not just his godfather but his cousin.

"You'll still have Kallas,"Hephaistion reassured him as they walked home. "You know how much he cares about you and he'll always be happy to listen."

"Yes,"Gaius said reluctantly."But he won't be there all the time."

"I haven't been there all the time, either,"Hephaistion reminded him of the time in Diana's house or even with Eudoxia or the times he had been out of Athens, the summers they had always spent apart.

"Yes but the summers were just a load of fun. I didn't need you for fun. I needed you for when things were difficult in Athens and if I wasn't at your house I could always just walk over. I can't just walk to Macedon," he said impatiently.

Hephaistion fell silent for a long time. Finally, in view of Amyntor's house, he had his thoughts gathered," I know and I'm sorry, Gaius, I really am. All I can say is that you'll spend the summers with me in Macedon and every winter we'll be in Crete together or if not, you can come up to Macedon. If things are really bad, you can come up to Pella whenever you want, even if it's just for a few days, we won't make money a problem. And I'll come to Athens still. With all of that, we'll probably still be together almost half the year. And as for the difficult times I won't be there...I think you're older now and you've learned to be stronger."

Hephaistion paused," I remember when your mother was in exile after Grandpa's death and how uncertain things were and how terrible it was when she died. But you got over that, Gaius, and I'm not dying."


It was a terrible medicine to give but when they were alone in Gaius' room that evening, Hephaistion said as gently as possible,"It's not an easy lesson to learn, my darling, but I'm not going to be here for ever."

Gaius face showed alarm and he exclaimed. Hephaistion shushed him and squeezed his hand. "I just mean that everyone dies, Gaius, and it's something we all have to experience," he considered a moment before carrying on. "Your parents' deaths were so difficult because of everything else that was going on around it, in particular with your mother and especially because of the way she died. It's made you anxious and dependent on me, I understand, and I wanted to make sure I was there for you."

Hephaistion paused again to see that Gaius was following,"What I'm saying is, you're growing up and you have to let go of me,too. And the one advantage of me moving to Macedon is that you'll be able to let go of me a bit, without having to live entirely without me as you would if I died."

Gaius was crying. Hephaistion sighed and got into bed with him to hug him closely,"Oh, Gaius, I'm so sorry. I really am."

When his wails reduced to sobs, Gaius spoke again,"Is it because you love Alexander better than you love me?"

Hephaistion was shocked,"No!"

Gaius was still teary and Hephaistion thought,once again, about the question. "I do love Alexander," he said slowly."And I do want to be with him. If it were possible to be in Athens and Pella, I would do that, but it's not. I don't love Alexander more, I love him very differently, but I think it's...more important for me to be with him now than it is for me to be here with you. Like I said, you're growing up."

"And Alexander is grown-up!"Gaius exclaimed.

In some ways, Hephaistion thought, but there were many ways in which Alexander was as insecure as a child. He stroked Gaius' hair,"Yes, and we want to have a life together. These are decisions I need to make that'll change my life, whereas your life isn't changing more than it would in any case when you're older. It'll be strange for me not to live with my parents but I can't stay with them forever and neither can you stay with me forever. Well, you'll always be welcome but it wouldn't be the best option. I think this will make us all stronger. Just trust me, Gaius, I've thought this through and it'll be alright in the end, it really will."


In spite of everything he had said to Gaius, Hephaistion was filled with anticipation and foreboding as the ship docked in Methone and then went upriver to Pella. It was a strange thing to arrive in Pella and not know when he would be leaving it.

Alexander was waiting for him in the docks and they embraced warmly. "Is everything settled?"Alexander asked sensitively as they left the harbour.

Hephaistion smiled,"Yes, I am officially living in Pella."

Alexander couldn't contain his smile and as soon as they were alone in the family's house, he kissed Hephaistion with passion. Hephaistion smiled and placed his arm around Alexander's neck before leaning in for another kiss.

When they broke apart, Alexander kept Hephaistion flush against his body and held his gaze. "I know what you've left behind for me and I'm going to make sure you don't regret it,"he whispered passionately.

"I won't regret it,"Hephaistion sighed with resignation, feeling also the full promise of his new life in Pella, and leaned in for another kiss.