AN - Hi, all my lovely readers. Thanks for the concerned comments. I'm fine, I promise. I just had to deal with life stuff for the last month, and I started feeling like I couldn't write worth shit, and I got a little depressed and a lot swamped at work, but things are better now, and I've set up a publishing schedule of *hopefully* every Sunday at the least. I'm going to try to stick to it so I don't let you all down. I have such plans for Jessie, it would be a shame not to share them.

Thanks for sticking around.

Hugs to all of you,
Redheadlass


I slid into a chair at the table and pulled my bowl of Bobby's chili over to me while the guys got their beer and grabbed hot sauce from the fridge. I sprinkled cheddar cheese over the top of my chili and grabbed a piece of cornbread off the plate in the middle of the table, digging into the hot food before the guys managed to get settled around me. No one said anything for a couple minutes while we all ate. I was about halfway through my bowl when Dean cleared his throat.

"You ready to hear the plan?" he asked when I looked up. I set my spoon down in the bowl and nodded. He lowered his chin a little, the look on his face stern. "I don't want to hear any arguments," he added.

"Yes, Dean," I said, trying to keep the excitement out of my voice.

"Don't get all worked up," he warned. "Our goal is to keep you as far away from Gabby as possible. You're only coming in once Gabby's knocked out."

My stomach dropped. "What? That's not fair! I can help before that…"

"What did I just say about arguing?" Dean broke in. "You don't have to be part of this fight at all. We can always use Vinnie to stab Gabby…"

I blanched, remembering what Vinnie had told me when we were locked in the basement room. "No, Dean," I said, shaking my head slowly, my throat tight. "Please don't make her do that. Please don't make her kill anyone else."

Dean's face softened, but his voice was still firm. "No arguing," he said.

I dropped my eyes. "No arguing," I agreed, staring at my half-empty bowl of chili.

Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Dean's entire body relax. "You ready to listen?"

"Yes," I whispered and lifted my head.

"We have no way to get in touch with Vinnie to see how much she can help or even if she's willing," he said. "We wanted to get a shill into the compound, to talk to Vinnie and find out more about Gabby's habits, but there's too much risk if Vinnie has switched back to Gabby's side."

"There's no way she would," I said, poking at my chili.

"You can't know that for sure," Sam said.

I looked at him. "There's no way," I said. "After what Gabby's done to her, made her do, she's never going to be on Gabby's side again."

Sam pressed his lips together. "Honey," he said in a gentle voice, "sometimes people choose the bad side because it's safer, because they'll be hurt less if they side with the bad guy, because the bad guy has power over them and they're too afraid that the bad guy will win and hurt them again."

Heat spread through me at his insinuation. Dropping my spoon, I clenched my fists and glared at him. "No! Vinnie would never do that!"

"Ok, enough," Dean broke in. "The point is that we don't know for sure and we can't count on her. She might be hurt or sick, or Gabby might have killed her." He met my eyes and held them until I nodded. He looked at Sam, who nodded too.

"Even if we could count on Vinnie, we couldn't use a shill," Bobby added. "We don't have anyone we trust enough, now that Jo and Ellen are gone." He voice broke a little and all of us shut up and looked at our bowls.

After a minute or so, I broke the silence, running a hand through my bangs. "So, then if we're not using a shill, what are we doing?"

"Well," Dean said, raising his head, "we know that Vinnie practices at that fire pit every day. We're going to sneak in during the night and hide in the woodshed like Bree did so we can talk to Vinnie. What happens next depends on whether Vinnie is willing and able to help us or not."

"She will be," I said, daring anyone to argue with me.

Dean ignored me. "If she's willing to help, we'll give her a sedative to put in Gabby's evening drink and a cell phone. Once she knocks Gabby out, she can call us and let us into the house, and you can stab Gabby with the stake."

"What are you going to give her?" I asked. "Gabby burned through the Benedryl really fast."

"A real sedative," Bobby said. "A barbiturate. You can develop a tolerance for Benedryl so it don't make you sleepy. That don't happen as quick with barbiturates, so she should be out long enough for you to stake her."

"If Vinnie's not willing to work with us," Sam said, "we'll knock her out."

"Yeah," I muttered. "Because what Vinnie needs is more people beating on her."

"Jessie…" Sam warned. No longer hungry, I shut up and pushed my chili away while he continued. "Once Vinnie's knocked out or if she can't help us because she's too hurt, we're going to get Gabby away from her cult so that we can inject her with a sedative. The only way to get her without her cult members is for you to summon her. We'll sneak into the barn, you'll summon her, and then the two of us will distract Gabby while Dean shoots her with the sedative. Once she's out, you can stab her."

"Why do we have to go to her if we can just summon her and stab her?" I demanded. "Let's just go outside and do that now!"

"Because that's the last resort," Dean snapped. "I don't want you to directly confront that bitch unless it's absolutely necessary."

"Oh, sure," I snapped back. "But let's put Vinnie in danger without a single thought."

Dean stood up in a rush, his chair toppling over behind him. He slammed both hands down onto the table, leaning his weight on them. "Given the choice between having you in danger and having Vinnie in danger, yeah, I'll pick Vinnie every time!" he yelled at me, his eyes flicking between mine. "But that's besides the point! She's not in any danger in either plan! She's only going to be in danger if you keep pushing me and I have to use her to stab Gabby instead of you, so shut your mouth and do what I say! You got me, princess?"

"Stop calling me that!" I yelled back at him, coming to my feet. "I'm not a fucking princess! I'm a hunter."

Straightening, Dean tilted his head to the side and crossed his arms over his chest. "Over my dead body," he said, his voice quiet and controlled. I paled at the expression on his face and half fell back into my chair, dropping my eyes.

Bobby broke in then. "Dean, sit down." Dean sat, not taking his eyes off me until Sam set a hand on Dean's forearm. "Look at me, kid," Bobby said to me. I obeyed. "Finish your dinner and think about what he's telling you. Really think, and if you've got any objections, you can bring 'em to me."

"I'm not hungry anymore," I grumbled, looking away again.

Bobby sighed. "All right, then come with me," he said, rolling backwards from the table. I glanced at Sam and Dean before standing back up and trailing Bobby back into the library. I heard Dean scoot his chair back in, his spoon clinking against his bowl as he ate.

Bobby led me to his desk and wheeled behind it to dig in one of the drawers. He pulled out a package wrapped in brown butcher's paper and tied with twine, setting it on the desk in front of him. I pressed my hands on top of the desk and leaned forward to try to read the writing on the top of the package, but the writing was thin and spidery, and I couldn't make it out.

"Who's it from?" I asked.

"It's from Bree," he said. My eyes widened. "She left it to you in her will. Her niece sent it." He pushed the package across the desk to me. I felt a little unsteady on my feet and set a gentle hand on top of the package, sliding my palm across the rough paper.

"What is it?" I whispered, raising my head to look at Bobby. "When did it get here?"

"Yesterday," Bobby answered in a soothing voice, his expression kind. "I don't know what it is. Go ahead and open it."

With shaking hands, I untied the twine and flipped the package over so I could unwrap it. It moved in my hands like it contained something soft, cloth. I slid my finger under the tape on the bottom of the package, trying to unstick it without tearing the paper. A wet blotch beaded on the paper and I wiped it away before realizing I was crying. Then Dean's hands were on my shoulders, Sam next to him and me, watching with concerned eyes. I unfolded the paper, uncovering a cream, crocheted shawl I'd seen her in a thousand times. It was her favorite. I pulled it out, my hands sinking into the familiar soft yarn as I went to Bobby's bed and spread it out there, my fingers tracing the circle pattern that started in the middle of the shawl, whirling out to the edges. I gathered the cool shawl up and spread it the half circle over my shoulders, my tears turning to sobs as I sat down on the edge of Bobby's bed.

The next thing I knew, Dean was next to me on the bed, pulling me into a hug while Sam sat on the other side and stroked my hair. Memories of Bree and what she'd told me flooded my thoughts and my cheeks started to burn with shame. I pulled my head off Dean's chest and wiped my eyes. "I'm sorry," I whispered, staring down at the cream shawl over my pale skin. "You're just trying to keep me safe and I'm fighting you on it again."

Dean let out a relieved sigh. "That mean you're on board with the plan?" he asked.

"Yeah," I said, lifting my eyes and meeting his eyes. "I'm on board with the plan, and you're in charge, and I won't argue any more."

"Good girl," Dean said. Sam kissed the top of my head and patted my knee, and Dean did the same. Both of them stood up. "We're gonna pack some stuff into the Impala and hit the road first thing in the morning." The two of them left the room.

I looked at Bobby. "Guess I'll do the dishes," I offered. "Thanks for the shawl, Bobby."

"You're welcome, kid," he said with a smile. I hugged him and headed into the kitchen to clean to the sound of the front door closing as he went out to help the guys.


Before bed that night, I had to get my second of the three nights of spankings for going after Gabby on my own. While Sam waited in the chair by the window for his turn, Dean pulled me between his knees and put his finger under my chin. "I'm tired you arguing with me, Jessie," he said.

"I know," I said, subdued. "I won't any more. I said I won't."

"I hear one word of argument over the next two days about anything from the plan to whether or not you eat your vegetables, you're out. You understand me?" he asked, and I was struck at how calm he was, how controlled. I swallowed hard. This was Dean at his most sincere. "You want to keep Vinnie from having to kill Gabby, then you stay on the straight and narrow. What I say goes. Period."

"Yes, sir," I whispered, biting down on my lip.

"Do I need to go over why you're getting this spanking again?"

I shook my head, and he flipped me over his lap, pulling my my shirt and pulling down my panties. I swore to myself that I wouldn't cry this time, that I wouldn't yell. I'd screwed up and put myself in danger going after Gabby. I deserved the spanking but that didn't mean I had to cry from it. I held my breath as his hand descended over and over. I tried to concentrate on the floor, distance myself from the spanking, but it didn't work. After less than ten spanks, I yelped and that was the end of it, I kicked and cried as he finished with his hand and switched to the hairbrush. When he was done with the brush, he straightened my clothes and put my back on my feet. I took the brush from him and turned to cross the room to Sam, who accepted it from me gravely.

"I let it go earlier," Sam said as he flipped me over his lap. "But I heard the swear word. Are you allowed to swear?"

"No, Sam," I sniffled to the floor, my face turning red as he bared my bottom.

"Don't let it happen again," he warned, and then his hand descended. With my butt already on fire, I didn't try not to cry with Sam, but he didn't lecture either. His hand fell swiftly and when he switched to the brush, it fell swiftly, too, the swats building up on each other until I was wailing. Then he straightened my clothes and put me on my feet. "Corner," he said, pointing at the one near the door. "Think about what you did wrong, about what Dean told you about arguing, and about not swearing."

I wiped my face with my hands and trudged to the corner, leaning on the walls while they moved around the room behind me. I was thankful they didn't say anything about it, and when Dean called me out of the corner, he had the blankets on my bed spread out and pulled back so I could get in. I smiled at the two of them and climbed into bed. They kissed me goodnight and Sam gave me my snowman. I wrapped my arms around him and hugged him to me.

"Get some sleep, sweetheart," Dean said, as he turned out the light. "We're leaving before the sun comes up in the morning."

"Ok," I murmured, my eyes closing. I heard the door shut, and as I drifted off to sleep, a thought occurred to me. I got up and slipped across the room to grab Bree's shawl, so warm to the touch. I wrapped it around my shoulders and climbed back into bed to go to sleep.

Finally… finally, we were going after Gabby. I couldn't wait until morning.