ACH! Sorry, I was watching Glee while typing the last chapter and I accidentally switched Baines's name to "Blaine" In the last half there.

Baine's name is, in fact, "Baines"

This would have been longer, but I saw the word count and was like, uh...yeah...let's split it. Besides, there are like, 2-3 mini-cliffhangers in this chapter cuz I ended it where I did. Teehee :P


The Killing Lights


It's killing time again.
Put on your face and let's pretend,
These killing lights won't kill us all again...

It's killing time again.
Cover your face and we'll pretend,
These killing lights can't kill us all again...

-AFI "The Killing Lights"


Ivy...

"Good news! We want you to join our alliance!" Cassi pipes up happily. Eri instinctively moves her hand toward her sword, wary of a trap. I cannot adequately convey to anyone how foolish I feel when she does that. How can I not have thought about that?

"It is okay Erianwen. You can relax. I don't want to kill you, I just want a bigger and better alliance so we can all survive longer!" Plastered on her face is an innocent smile that could melt stone. I am smart enough to still be wary of this little girl. Cassi sees that Eri and I are not yet drawn in so she decides to bring our conversation to a close. "So, are you in or are you out?"

I look up at Eri. "Your call." She bites her lip and contemplates the options. Knowing that she is know fully responsible for my life as well as hers must be tough. Much to my dismay, Eri accepts the alliance. Luckily, she seems as wary as I am. Perhaps she realizes something I don't. I hope so. Cassi claps happily, pleased with Eri's answer.

"First order of business," Baines begins, "Is to get some rest. It is almost sundown."

Eri giggles, "Sundown. Nobody in District 9 talks like that anymore." Baines shoots her a killer look and she immediately shuts up.


Ever...

I check the sponsor money. Ivy needs weapons. Immediately. Much to my dismay, there is absolutely no sponsor money. I bite my lip to keep from screaming in anger. I feel someone tap me on the shoulder and look up to see Hila, the Capitol maid servant. "Miss Abernathy, President Snow has arranged for you to meet with a man eager to sponsor your tributes."

I nod quickly, realizing what she really means. I don't get it! I should have slept with enough old, perverted, sickening Capitol men to have sponsor money!


Haymitch...

I see the Capitol servant girl walk into the room and I feel as if my heart has stopped then shattered. I know exactly what she is here for; she is here to send my daughter off to sleep with men old enough to be, well, me.

Just the thought of what will happen makes me want to throw up.

My little girl...Ever please no! You are only a child, still a baby! More importantly, you are my little Ever, my baby, my little girl. Men shouldn't be hurting you at this age.

I reach for Ever and grab a hold of her wrist. She tries to avoid making eye contact with me, but I am relentless and once I make eye contact she doesn't look away. We stare at each other for a few seconds, letting my worried and heartbroken look speak for itself.

"Daddy..." She says before whispering to me, "I'm still your little girl."

No... I suddenly realize she isn't. She is no longer that happy, innocent, untainted angel. But I still love my daughter. "Be careful."

"I will Daddy." She says before being led out.

Chaff bites his lip. "I...suddenly feel the need to give Miranda a hug."

"Yeah me too." Seeder says quickly. They dismiss themselves.

I can't take it anymore either, so I run to my room in the Training Center. Alcohol, alcohol, alcohol... I muss in my mind. A Puruse the room for some and luckily find a bottle of vodka. I open it and take several large sips. I am ashamed of myself for drinking so much, breaking my sobriety promise to Ever- surely she would understand? Another sip. I should have died in the arena. Then Ever never would have been born and never would have been forced to be a Capitol plaything.

Several more sips in and I drunk. Not wasted, but drunk enough to not care about anything or think.

I press the bottle to my lips and prepare to drink the rest of it until I hear the door click open. "Haymitch, don't you dare." Says a soft but stern voice. "Fuck off." I hiss, not looking up to see who the person is.

"Good thing you are drunk. Otherwise, I'd have killed you just then." They say, walking over to me a prying the bottle from my hands.

"Dammit bitch!" I shout, trying to grab the bottle back from them.

"Haymitch can you stop swearing please?" They ask calmly.

I look up and discover that the person is a woman; in fact, she is a very familiar blonde. "Holy hell, I'm sorry I called you a bitch and told you to fuck off! I didn't even see-"

"Sh...Haymitch, it's okay." She says soothingly, bending down to pick up something from the floor.

"You shouldn't be doing that."

She scoffs, "Why is it that men assume pregnant women are so delicate than picking up a pen is a no-no?" The question was rhetorical as it is followed by, "What's going on with Ever, Haymitch?"

I get defensive. "Nothing!"

"What do you take me for, a stupid bitch?" She presses. I sense anger in her voice.

"You know I didn't mean that-"

"I know. Just tell me what is up with Ever and I'll forget you even said that." She gives me this uncomfortable stare.

I shake my head. "Rae...Raewyn please don't make me tell you. You do. Not. Want. To. Know...know anything about it." I search for another bottle. I need something to do to keep from telling her.

"No. Tell me." She demands harshly. Her facial expression suddenly softens to one of panic and she sits down next to me on the couch. She places her hand on mine. "Please Haymitch? I know something is up. This-" She gestures toward my drunken self, "-is just proof."

I shake my head. "No. Too many people already know. Snow will hurt you if you find out. I'm surprised he hasn't done anything to Finnick, Chaff, Seeder or I y-"

Oh that was smart. Now she is really pissed! "Am I the only one who is clueless? Chaff and Seeder know?" She lets go of my hand and crosses her arms. To add another sign of her pissed-off-ness she gives me the coldest glare imaginable.

Slowly, I reach for her hand. She moves it away but even drunk I am quicker than she is. Once I finally have her hand I make sure she doesn't yank it away again. It is a difficult task to be kind and loving while drunk, but I try anyway. "Ya can' know 'cause," I slur. "Oh hell." I sigh.

She gives me a look that says, 'tell me now!'

I gently squeeze her hand before pulling her closer. "You know that Ever is the only thing I care about more than you. That is why you are not allowed to know. Snow threatened Ever with horrible things as a warning for if people did find out. Finnick found out by chance, Seeder figured it out, Finnick let it slip when he was talking to me and Chaff wouldn't let up until I told him. That is why we all know."

"But I still want to know! There has to be something I can do to help her...isn't there?"

I shake my head. "Nobody can help her. Not even me."

"Haymitch...I'm sorry." She whispers.

I don't say anything yet but I kiss her hand. When I finally say something, "I want to tell you everything, believe me I do; but I don't want anything to happen to you. I l-" I struggle with the words. Just say it. "I love you too much to see you ge' hurt."

Her face changes from angry-worried to shy-smiley. "You- you love me?"

"Tha' wasn' obvious?" I slur. I can't believe I had to be drunk to tell her. Oh well. She smiles and leans against me. I can get use to this.

I just hope I'm not too drunk to remember this tomorrow morning...


Eri...

Fudge!

Ivy putting me on the spot like that...not only was that totally unforeseen it was totally unfair! Had she not learned from that night in the big cypress tree that I cannot handle someone putting their life in my hands! I am angry. No, angry is an understatement. I am irked, furious, enraged, exacerbated!

Don't what exacerbated means? Shame, shame, shame. Am I the only one who reads dictionaries for fun?

Whatever.

Perhaps I am being selfish and unethical by shoving the blame for my discomfort totally on Ivy. I suppose it is just all of the stress of being in the Games. I sigh and lay my weapons- a sword and a hatchet- down beside me to sleep. Why Eri? Why did you even waste your time with something as fugacious as an alliance in this arena? I'll bet the only person who will possibly know what "fugacious" means is Baines. I sigh and recite aloud like at school, "Fugacious. fyoo-GAY-shuhs; adjective. Definition: Lasting but a short time; fleeting. F-U-G-A-C-I-O-U-S. Fugacious."

A strong pair of arms wraps around my waist and a pair of lips start kissing my neck. "You sound so cute when you recite words. You know you don't have to do that here, right, though?"

I smile and shrug.

"Force of habit. You know how strict they are back home. Don't you?"

He nods and stops kissing me. "Babe I want to thank you for doing what I asked."

"Of course, hun." I tell Baines, my boyfriend of three years. We were about to be engaged...before the reaping that is.

"No, no, no. You have no idea how happy it makes me, seeing the girl from 12 here- sleeping peacefully, not suspecting a thing-"

"-while her allies plot to kill her?" I seductively finish his sentence for him.

"Mm, I knew I did something right when I fell in love with you."

I giggle, "But Baines, about the whole killing-Ivy thing...can we nix that plan?"

He pushes me away furiously. "Why!" He roars in the most animalistic way. Had I not known any better, I'd of thought he was a roaring lion.

"I like her. She's sweet- did you know two of her siblings died in the Games? And that she and Ever have been best friends since they were toddlers? That she worries for her siblings back home, but mostly her twin brother? Did you even know she has a twin brother?" I touch my hand to his cheek and lean in to kiss him. He pushes my hand away before smacking me across the face with such force I fall down. I do not cry- he smacks me around a lot. I don't ever glare at him. Instead, I respect him more for it.

This is how relationships work in District 9. I do not really like it, but I have no choice.

"No. I did not know she had a twin brother. Do you know why that is?" He gets on top of me and holds me down with all of his weight.

"N-no." I stutter, showing fear for once in our relationship.

He pulls out a knife and holds it to my neck. "I don't." He puts more pressure on the knife and it hurts. "Take time." The knife breaks skin and I can feel the warm liquid trickle down my neck before I hear him sniff the air. The slight breeze shifts the metallic scent to him. "To get." He keeps sniffing the air. Blood has always been like a drug to him; the mere smell of it. "To know." He moves the knife away and lowers his face to the cut in my neck. His lips are getting closer to the cut. Is he going to kiss it? That's sick and twisted! "My prey!" He hisses, finishing the sentence at last. But he obviously isn't finished with his display of his dominance over me. He sticks his tongue out and gets a taste of my blood.

"Stop!" I whine, trying to shove him off of me. He is too strong and eventually, he gets off of me once he's tasted enough blood.

"Don't stray from the plan. Again. From now on, you sleep only when I am awake. I will make sure I stay awake so you cannot take the girl from 12 and run. Got it?"

"Y-yes, Baines." I lie. Never. I'll kill him and Cassi both if I have to! I will not kill Ivy!

I spot the knife covered in my blood lying next to me so I pick it up and don't bother cleaning the blade. With a sudden burst of courage, I scurry over to Baines. "Consider yourself single."

"You idiot!" He seethes furiously. "Don't you realize I'm the best things that has ever happened to-"

"GYAH!" I shove the knife into his abdomen and instantly yank it out. Then I stab him again. And again. And again. And again. And I don't stop until-Boom!

I hear his cannon and I smile sadistically to myself. The cannon wakes Cassi and Ivy who promptly look at me. Eyes widened, mouths in a perfect 'O' shape. I lift the knife, still covered in a mixture of my blood and Baines' blood and point it at the body of my ex-boyfriend. "He attacked me first. Look." I defend, using my free hand to point at the knife wound in my neck.

I can see it in Ivy's eyes that she believes me. Cassi is reluctant. She bursts into tears, "Y-y-you killed B-B-B-Baaaaaiiiiins-s-s-s!" I open my mouth to try and console her, but her tears suddenly disappear and are replaced with a glint of pure hatred and evil in her eyes. "You will pay!" She lunges at me with her knife.

"Yah!" I hear Ivy shout.

"Hu-" Cassi gasps. I look behind Cassi and I watch as Ivy's face slowly looses it's color. She has just thrown one of Cassi's own knives at her back.

Boom!

Ivy has just killed Cassi.

"No way- Ivy-"

"Please don't kill me!" She shrieks. "I didn't mean to kill Cassi, I-I-I just-"

I cover her mouth with my hand. "Hush! I'm not going to kill you. We are allies, remember?"

"Yeah, but I killed-"

"So did I! Besides, had you not killed Cassi she'd've killed me. You did what you had to do."

Ivy nods.

"Thanks Eri."

"No problem, Ivy."

"I think we should get out of here. The cannons undoubtedly woke the Careers." I say to her. She agrees with me instantly and inquires about where we will go. "The cypress tree?" I suggest, unsure for myself.

She shakes her head. "I'd rather avoid the swamp. What if...what if we don't go so much out as we go up?"

"Huh?" I am utterly confused.

Ivy smiles. "Walk as far as we feel like walking away from the swamp. We are in the woods now, so there are trees. We should find leafy trees and go up them as far as we can!"

I jump up and hug her. "Ivy that is genius! Let's go!" She smiles and happily leads the way to perceived safety.


Kenton...

My whole family has gone to bed- except me of course. I've been sleeping most of the day so I can stay up all night and watch the Games. Witnessing Ivy kill that Cassi girl is...surreal. Not in the good way, either. Her kills are as reluctantly as Ever's last year.

"Bad Kenton!" I shout, slapping myself across the face. No thinking about Ever! You are watching for Ivy this year! Ivy!

"Ouch," I complain to myself. I go the small mirror hanging in the hallway to see if there is a mark; I have to wipe away the coal dust before I can clearly see the hand print. It is impossible not to compare it to the one Baines left on Erianwen's face. How any man could hit a woman is beyond me. No matter how many times I've wanted to knock my sisters' teeth out, I haven't! I don't even remember a time when I slapped, kicked, punched or bitten one of them. Wait there was this one time when my older sister took my little stuffed kitty. I bit her in the leg but I was four so I think that can be overlooked.

I turn my attention back to the screen to observe the Games. If anybody thought Erianwen and Ivy were safe...they were dead wrong.

It seems like the pair from District 1 has broken from the Career pack when the camera were not focused on them. They, too, have found the end of the swamp.

Their conversation can be heard all across Panem:

"No fair! I want to kill the girl form 12!" Shouts the boy.

The girl grins, "I called dibs, sorry little cousin!"

The boy glares at his cousin. "But City was my cousin, not yours. I should be getting revenge!"

"But we're cousins!"

"Yeah. My mom is your father's sister. But my father's brother is married to City Ballantine's mother. That makes me his cousin. You were nothing to him therefore I should get to avenge his death!"

"Ugh!" She exclaims, exasperated. "Fine. We will kill her together- but!- I get the first punch, throw, stab, kick- or whatever. Got it?"

"Sure. As long as I get to deliver the final blow."

Click.

I press the 'POWER' button on the television to cut it off; I don't need to hear any more of the plotting. There is a piece of paper and a pen sitting on the old coffee table in front of me. I grab it and scribble down a few words:

District 1 is out to get Ivy. Mentor from 10 send message to tribute years ago. They are a little expensive. Use all of the money I've sent to warn her.

-KR

I makes the end of the R circle around both letters.

Of course, for them to, "use all of the money I've sent..." I will have to send money. I run upstairs to by bedroom, the floorboards creaking with every move I make. Carefully sewn into my pillow by my older sister (may she rest in peace) is a stash of money. She and my brother (may he also rest in peace) worked in the mines and saved every last bit of it for the family. There is probably enough sewn in this pillow to last me a year and a few extra weeks. Food, soap, candles- everything. I was always instructed never to use it unless times got really bad.

But nobody knows about the money except for myself and Ever.

Nobody will know if I give it for Ivy's sake. If Ivy can live, then Ever will always have her best friend; and that means she will be happy. It should be obvious that I would do anything to help her and make her happy.

Before I can even think about what I am doing, I run to the front door and grab my jacket. Barring any kind of shoes whatsoever I run through the coal dust-polluted streets to the Hob. Swearing loudly as I pull a thorn out of my foot, I open the door. It is well past the District curfew, but it isn't like any of our Peacekeepers care.

Greasy Sae and Vulcan Hopeflame- Ivy's father- have started a sponsorship program. Nobody is District 12 believes that it will help much- those in the District who have money are usually to stingy to give a decent amount of it. Except Ev- No thinking about her! Ivy, focus on Ivy!

"Kenton, what are you doing here? Past curfew." Vulcan asks, trying to look intimidating but it is obvious he really does not care.

I check my pocket before I answer. I had wrapped the money and the note in a dirty cloth before leaving my house in the Seam. "The sponsor program. This is all I have- but trust me. It will help." I pull the cloth out of my jacket and place it in the donation box.

Vulcan thanks me and I just nod and hurry home.

Here's hoping it gets to the Capitol on time...


Ever...

I had my second meeting with Vice President Cole earlier this evening.

Rather than returning to watch the Games, I run to my room in the Training Center.

I just want to go home. I miss my room. My stuff. Most of all, my friends. Lazily, I reach over and press a button, summoning my Avox. The girl is pretty and has red hair. "I have to ask you a question. Sorry to bother you."

She shakes her head as if to tell me, "No, it is okay. It it my job."

"Can I send a letter to District 12?"

She nods immediately.

"Thank you. Do you want a blueberry muffin?" I ask, gesturing toward the box on the counter of the kitchenette.

She shakes her head and points to her missing tongue.

"Right. Can't taste it. Thanks again." I say as she turns to leave.

I tear the room apart looking for paper and a pen. Before I finally find them, the room is a terrible mess- it looks like the Games have occurred inthe room. I begin to write, letting the pen dance across the page:

August 27th, 3378

Dear Kenton,

You will never guess who I asked about sending a letter- an Avox! She was really nice but I'm afraid I made an ass of myself my offering her a blueberry muffin. No tongue no taste; how could I have forgotten?

I know that you are probably in no mood to hear about all of my problems when I am sure you have plenty of your own, but I needed to talk to someone. The reason I don't speak to my victor friends is I am afraid to. And my father...well, Daddy has enough to deal with without listening to my problems right now. Though, I am sure he would drop everything for me in an instant, I'd rather speak with someone whom's ears (eyes in this case) are freshest. You can burn this is you don't want to read about my depressing issues- I will be acting like I never wrote this letter once I return to 12 so I expect you never to mention it again.

Kenton, I just feel so lost. The Capitol. It is a scary place. All that I saw it as when I was a little girl was the place with the pretty lights. But now? I see it for what it really is and I don't like it. Kenton, I need you to understand that I cannot tell you everything. It is for your own safety that I keep what I am about to hint at a secret. I know you will be curious but any questions you ask about the subject will not be answered. Just know that it is horrible: Kenton, the Capitol makes me do things that I never wanted to. I've become a different person while I am here. When I return to District 12 you will not notice any change in me whatsoever. I will put on my happy face- perhaps after going through a few weeks of depression over Ivy's death. (Surely you too must realize it is hopeless.) But I will act like the same Ever for everybody back home because I know that is what they want. They want to believe their"victor" is still strong and cannot be defeated. If that is what they want then that is what they will get. Just believe me when I say that it isn't an easy part to play.

I suppose this is better saved for when I return home, but I'd rather get it out now. Being a victor has ruined everything for me. I just look at father and wonder if that will be me next year...or perhaps in two years? Five? Ten? Twenty? Thirty? Who really knows, Kenton? I just want to stop worrying.

I have already begun mourning Ivy's death. I have prepared what I am going to say to her father, mother and Josh in my head. I know I should be prepared for give a few sentences offering my condolences, but it seems like the more and more I prepare myself the less prepared I am. I won't even bother asking you why that is because I doubt anybody can fairly be asked that.

Here is a question I do not mind asking you, though. I sound too old to be Ever Abernathy, don't I?

I am running out of energy to keep my eyes open and I want to get this sent out as soon as possible, so I'm afraid I will have to stop writing soon. But before I do:

Kenton, please! Stop sighing up for tesserae. That money you have stashed in your pillow? Use that to survive until you are eighteen. Yes, I know. You will be working in the coal mines at that point but I promise I will try to think of something I can do to keep you from the mines. I know that you and I had figured that that money would only last a year but I have recalculated it and have come to the conclusion that the money will last- if used sparingly- much, much longer than that. Also, you know that Daddy and I will give you any amount you ask for.

But please.

Stop putting your name in there more times than I has to be. You are the only friend I have left. Damien is too busy with his family to even say "hello" when we pass in the streets, Ivy will die within a matter of days now, and Josh will likely never speak to me again. Oh he may come around eventually; if we give him 20 or 30 years.

I suppose you are depressed and I am trying to tihnk of something happy to end this letter with. I don't know if this will make you happy or not, but...

...the starfish bracelet you made me for my birthday?

Haven't taken it off since, and every time I feel lost, lonely or just confused I look at it and I think of you. I have no idea why you automatically come to mind and please don't freak out when I say this, but I like it. I really like it.

Love always,

Ever