Alistair

There has been no one brighter than you
I can't deny these things that I do
Feels like the world's at stake 'cause
I have been waiting
I have been waiting for you

Heavenly, that's what you are
You're burnin' me like a shining star
How am I supposed to be that king without you

'What was the woman thinking?' Alistair wondered to himself as he got ready for bed. So much for trying to make decisions based upon what he wanted, or what he thought was right; the conversation with Eamon had been like being run over by Mabari. Maddie was actually supportive of Arl Eamon's idea that Alistair become king. Maddie knew it was never what he wanted. How could she do this to him? She'd said she understood what it was like to have no choices in life. He'd told her that he'd never wanted to be king. He'd had a very similar conversation with Cogburn and yet the man had simply stood silent. Oh, once or twice he'd made a comment but it was very plain that the man supported his twin sister's mad delusions that Alistair would be a good king.

A knock at his door startled him out of his thoughts. Heedless of the fact that he was wearing only his breeches Alistair jerked the door open to find Maddie with her hand raised for another knock. She blinked at the sight of him and lowered her hand. "Come in." Alistair barely kept from growling the words. "What were you thinking?"

"I thought it would be nice to spend the night with you in a bed…the whole night…and not have to leave for a watch. Since we're staying at Redcliffe until we leave for the Brecilian forest." Maddie tilted her head, her tone uncertain. "If you don't…I mean I can go if you—"

"Maker preserve me, that's not what I meant." Alistair groaned. He tugged her inside the room and closed the door. "I meant…why in Andraste's name did you agree with the Arl about me becoming King?"

Maddie sighed, her hands twisting together before she spoke. "I thought that you were our only option, which is handy because I believe you'll be an excellent king." Alistair watched her face as she spoke, noting how carefully she seemed to be choosing her words. "Loghain isn't an option really. And…I haven't met her yet…but I really don't think Anora will be accepted as Queen unless we support her."

"Why not support her then?" Alistair asked, aware that his tone was still irritated. "You know I don't want to be king."

Maddie's spine straightened as he watched and her chin took on the mulish set he was too familiar with. "Because I want you alive for one thing!" She snapped the words out. Alistair realized his face must have looked as confused as he felt because Maddie continued speaking. "Number one, Anora is Loghain's daughter and I don't know how much of her father's plot she supports, but I don't think we can trust her completely and Cogburn agrees with me. Number two, no matter what you'll still be Maric's son and a danger to anyone on the throne if they aren't of Maric's direct legitimate line."

"Even if I don't want it?" Alistair protested. "How am I a danger?" He knew he sounded like a child but somehow he couldn't stop himself. Being king, just the thought of that responsibility, was terrifying.

Maddie actually groaned. "I know you're not that naïve. You'd like to be but you're not." She shook her head, raking her hair back from her face in way Alistair knew meant she was frustrated. "Anora has been queen for years. And she's popular which means she knows how to sway opinion to her side and she's political enough to have the support of the nobles doing it. Without Cailan she's going to lose some of that support, she has no claim to the throne beyond being Cailan's wife. So she has two choices. Marry Maric's other son, or have him killed so that she's the only option for the throne."

"Have Maric's—have me killed." Alistair sighed. "Yeah, you're right, I'm not that naïve. I suppose I was hoping she'd realize that if I hadn't gone after the throne when Cailan was alive I wouldn't do it with him dead."

"You could marry her." Maddie said her tone cautious. "It's politically expedient."

"I don't see that happening." Alistair shook his head. "Cailan was already being pressured to set her aside because they hadn't had a child yet."

"And if she's told that in no uncertain terms, her only option to keep the throne is to have you killed." Maddie touched his arm, drawing his gaze from the window back to her eyes. "And that's something Loghain has already tried. We don't know that Anora didn't give him her support for such an endeavor."

Alistair sighed. She had such beautiful eyes and right now they were dark with worry, her forehead wrinkled with concern. "So I really don't have a choice. I have to take the throne. Somehow if she's that ruthless I don't think me being a Grey Warden and renouncing titles will be enough."

"No." Maddie shook her head. "But there's a small bright side to the whole thing." She offered, her lips curving in a tiny smile.

"Oh?" Alistair took her hand, rubbing his thumb over her knuckles. "What's that?"

"As far as the nobles are concerned, they'll see me as a Cousland more than a Grey Warden."

Alistair frowned tugging her closer. "How is that the bright side?"

"Technically if they overlook the fact that I'm a Grey Warden, they'll think of me as the possible Teyrna of Highever. Or they'll see my twin as the next Teyrn and he supports you as king too." Maddie's smile was tinged with a sorrow Alistair hated to see. "We're of a rank equal to Loghain. If we support your claim to the throne no one will argue."

"So you'd have to stay close to me…if I have to be king…so the nobles will see you support me?" Alistair smiled down at her as he slid his hands to her waist and held her. "That is a bright side."

"Now… did you want me to return to my room or should I stay here?" Maddie asked, her eyes brightening a bit as she looked up at him.

"Oh…you should really stay here…I think I'm going to need a lot of reassurance about this king stuff." Alistair grinned as he finally took in what she was wearing. The Arlessa must have lent Maddie a robe and gown because Maddie was wearing silk and lace for the first time since Alistair had met her.

"Well then I should begin my duties directly." Maddie stood on tiptoe and pressed a kiss to his cheek.

Alistair groaned as her movement pressed her breasts against his chest and scooped her up. "I move we adjourn to the bed for this discussion." He declared. "I want you horizontal for this talk." Her only answer was Maddie's giggle and a sigh as he began to kiss her more thoroughly.


After, Alistair stroked the softness of Maddie's hair as she lay against him and wondered how he could become king. Kings had to have heirs. The only lover he wanted was another Grey Warden. Grey Wardens couldn't have children together…not that he'd ever heard of. With others besides the Wardens possibly, but it was rare. How could he tell Maddie? If he became king the nobles were certain to insist that he marry if only for heirs. How could he marry someone other than Maddie?

Her hand slid up and down his chest. "You're not sleeping." Her soft voice observed. "Are you still worrying?" She rested her chin on his chest and looked at his face.

"It's a lot to think about…become king or end up dead of a knife in the dark." Alistair sighed. "I just don't know how I could be king without you at my side."

Maddie pushed herself up on an elbow and looked down at him. "And what makes you think I'll be going anywhere?"

"They'll want me to marry." Alistair's arms tightened around her as if someone would come take her away immediately. "You're the woman I love… I don't want anyone else."

Maddie smiled. "I love you too." Her grey eyes were bright with a mischievous look Alistair knew well. "Trust me, I don't want to give you up either. Let me worry about the rest of it."

Alistair pulled her up so her face was level with his. "Well, if you put it like that." She was so beautiful, how could she care for a fool like him? "I'll just concentrate on keeping you happy." Her lips were parting in a grin when he kissed her. Maddie's mouth was sweet and hot, her tongue dueling with his as Alistair's hands moved from her waist to her breasts, cupping her in his hands.

Her low moan of delighted need was like music. Alistair rolled so Maddie was beneath him and balanced on his elbows so he could continue kissing her before he bent and fastened his mouth to her breasts. Her reaction was a cry, desire ringing through her voice and her hands clung to his shoulders. In this, Maddie always gave him his way, his leader, the warrior he would follow into any battle, became only a woman when she was in his bed.

Alistair smiled against her skin, feeling Maddie trembling under him. Only a woman…such an understatement. She was the most extraordinary woman he'd ever known. He felt her hands slide down his body, seeking his cock, stroking him seductively. "My impatient lady." He murmured as he lifted his head to kiss her again.

"I'd not be so impatient would you give me what I need." Maddie groaned under him. "Alistair…"

"My love…" Alistair teased as his lips touched her neck and shoulders. "I only want to be certain you're fully…pleased." He couldn't help but enjoy the way she writhed under him, her thighs parted and ready.

"I shall be pleased beyond measure if you would simply take what I would give." Maddie pulled his face to hers and kissed him in erotic demand. "Please Alistair."

"Your desire is my command." Alistair groaned the words as he slid inside her. "Maddie," he gasped as she moved her hips under him, meeting his thrusts.

"Mine…" He heard her gasp. "You're mine...my love…my Alistair…"

Alistair rolled pulling her on top of him, his hands on her hips to help her ride. "Love," He gasped, "Maddie…" He stared up at her as she rose and fell over him, her breasts gleaming in the light of the candle, her eyes were luminous as she looked down at him. Her pace quickened as she bent down, her breasts rubbing against his chest. Alistair groaned, Maddie gasped and their bodies began to collide ever faster.

"Alistair…" The girl's cry came out as a gasp as her body shuddered and climaxed around his.

He couldn't take anymore, she was so tight, her body so hot around him, Alistair watched as Maddie came, squeezing around him, his hands gripped her hips, pulled her body hard onto him, and groaned as his seed erupted into her. "Mine…" He moaned, "Maddie…mine."


Maddie slept finally, exhausted from the day's events and Alistair cuddled her close, smoothing her soft hair away from her face. It had grown in the months he'd known her, instead of reaching her jaw now it fell a knuckle length below her ears. She'd gained several scars as well. Alistair slid his hand down her side, feeling the scar like a starburst over her ribs, the wound from a Darkspawn mage that had nearly killed her.

"I'll find a way to keep you at my side." Alistair promised. "If we don't die during the Blight...I swear my love, I'll find a way to marry you. You'll be my queen or I won't have one." He looked down at her beautiful face and wondered how he'd managed without her in his life. "You're mine, my adored." He murmured. "Maker help me, even if it leaves Ferelden without a king, I won't give you up."

He rose from the bed carefully, hoping he wouldn't disturb her, and gathered up the clothing they'd discarded. Draping her robe and gown over a chair where Maddie could reach them in the morning, Alistair set his own clothing nearby and slid back into bed. Maddie opened her eyes and looked at him, her lips curving up in a smile.

"I'm sorry my love, I didn't mean to wake you." Alistair murmured. He pulled the quilts over them and let his fingers caress her face once more.

"It's all right." Maddie's eyes were tired but stayed on his face, as if she too feared their separation. "I'd rather wake and be able to see you, than sleep alone."

"I feel the same way." Alistair kissed her forehead. "Cogburn said something about spending a day here before we go see the Elves." He sighed. "I'm not eager for Eamon and Teagan to bend my ear another day more about ruling Ferelden but if it means a day of rest, mending the armor and healing up I'll deal with it."

"And it means another full nights sleep." Maddie yawned and snuggled closer to Alistair. "I love being with you."

Alistair smiled down at her. "I love being with you too." He made sure the quilts were tucked securely around her. "Now sleep my love. And let me hold you and love you even while we dream." Maddie made a soft noise of assent and let him wrap her in his arms.

TBC


Author's Note: Sorry for the delay folks, had some problems over the weekend but we're all back on track now. This is a discussion I really thought Alistair and Maddie should have because politically she isn't as naive as he is. And the more I think about the game, (which my husband just played through again) the more I really think Anora being in Howe's keep was a setup, considering Loghain's men were waiting for the Wardens once they'd 'freed' Anora. So I don't trust her and Maddie wouldn't either.