Different feeling sort of chapter, but no promises on how it'll be next time. They're trying is all I can really say and be patient. Everything has a purpose no matter how fed you get with them. No conflict means no plot for a writer
Thank you for the reviews! Excited as heck with the numbers climbing so high. I may take a break for a couple of days but we'll see.
Chapter 50
Riding in cars with boys
It was nearing midnight before the parlor was ready to officially lock up for the night. Juice did the honors since he as there anyways, locking up with the key he'd pass off to Stone in the morning to let us back inside. The upstairs was always locked no matter what, only the MC going up for whatever it was they did up there in the middle of the night.
Carla was frowning at us; watching as Juice walked too closely to be a friend and hovering as I lowered myself into the passenger seat of the Accord with him shutting the door. Her pretty blue eyes gave me a look that had never been directed towards me by any female in my entire life. She was jealous.
Juice slid into the driver's seat glancing at me in the moonlight. "I don't know where you live." he admitted.
"You can't take me there." I told him softly looking down at the cup holder then fought back a smile when I saw that my lipstick was still in the shallow circle. My ponytail holders were still around the rearview mirror.
"Oh. Your um, your dad right?" He nodded backing out slowly anyways. "How about if we just go somewhere nearby and talk then when we're done I'll drop you off near your place?"
It was a sweet suggestion. A suggestion that I knew bothered him more than what he was saying. He'd never fit into my family no matter how hard he tried. Their beliefs weren't going anywhere and the fact was; Juice would probably never be allowed inside of the house or the driveway. Now wasn't the time to test that suspicion either since I was relying on my dad's goodwill for a roof over my head.
I nodded then realized he couldn't see me while he drove. "That works for me."
He took a quick right heading for the edge of town where new developments were going up in the form of Charming Heights. It was only halfway built and looked too uppity for the town. "I thought you were going to slip out the back door."
"I didn't want to turn down a free ride home."
"Guess I deserve that huh?" Juice said pulling the car into the empty lot. He twisted slightly in the seat showing me that even just going for a late night drive, he was packing. The top of his preferred Glock stuck out of the waist of his pants.
I unbuckled myself turning too, pulling my legs up into the seat. "What'd you want to talk about Juice?"
"About everything. Again. I think.. No I know, that you're not handling this so great." Juice said leaning against the seat watching me as he spoke. "You gotta start taking better care of yourself Linds. Maybe go see a doctor."
I rolled my eyes knowing now what had constituted this change in his demeanor towards me. "I don't want to go. I feel fine."
"But the baby needs to go get checked out." He pointed out dropping his eyes to my stomach for a brief second. "Wendy said you've been smoking like a chimney and drinkin damn energy drinks. You can't do that shit."
"How should I know that?" I jutted my chin out indignantly. "I told you Juice, I don't know anything about pregnancy or babies."
"You gotta learn. Stop being in denial. I know you can feel it." Juice lifted his eyebrows. "I looked it up."
Snorting, I covered my bump from his stare. "No I can't. And Wendy's a rat. Is there anything else you want to talk about?"
"Lindsey." He said my name quietly in his pleading way that only he could do. It was the same voice he'd said my name with the first night we'd met. "Go to the doctor, please. It'll really help things."
My tough façade was crumpling now that he wasn't being an ass. "With us?" I asked hating to be so eager but unable to stop myself. The urges were still there I saw him, the same pangs, the same love.
"Yes. It will. I'll take care of it if you'll just go, for me, please." Juice was asking so sweetly with big brown eyes.
I couldn't help but nod back. "Okay. I'll go, but I'm not making any promises on my feelings changing about this."
"Trust me, I know you aren't." He was smirking at me. "You've made it clear where you stand at on this. But I just gotta see you try, remember? I asked you to just try."
It was all he could really ask. I nodded again showing him I was serious about going. "What else did you want to talk about?"
"I wanted to see if you wanted to take your car back." Juice was offering it up like it was nothing but it was too much. Entirely too much.
I couldn't take the car back. It'd been bought with his money and I was already in debt to him up to my eyeballs. I couldn't add the car to it as well or I'd never truly be on my own. "I can't Juice. Thank you, but no thanks."
"You can't walk everywhere."
"I have before."
He started to argue back then stopped himself. "I don't want to fight tonight. I just want to try and stay a little civil with you. I'm hurt and I'm still mad but Wendy made a few points earlier."
"I'm hurting too." My hands were getting sweaty with just the anxiety of talking to him like this. My heart rate was picking up when he sat up leaning closer. I could smell his gum he was getting so close to me.
The mint of his breath was cool when it hit my face, his mouth just inches away from mine. "I know you are. And its killing me to see it but I don't want to make it worse by pretending nothing ever happened and it constantly nagging at us."
I nodded, taking in the features of his profile. The ears I hoped the baby didn't have, the beautiful eyelashes, a hint of stubble on his chin. It all screamed of a familiar electricity that was drawing us together like it always had. Juice leaned down then turned his head last minute catching me in a tight hug instead of kissing me like I'd been hoping.
I tucked my face into the crook of his neck inhaling deeply as my body tensed at being against his like this. Slowly, I reached up wrapping my arms around his middle hugging him back. "I'll go to the doctor if you want me to. I just want to put things back right baby." I whispered as he squeezed me. "I'll go."
SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASO
I tapped the toe of my sneakers against the edge of the sidewalk frowning as my phone rang endlessly in my ear. Third time I'd tried Juice with no answer.
He'd said he was going with me today and now I couldn't get a hold of him. I hit the end button sighing as I started walking towards the entrance of St. Thomas. Mom had dropped me off on her way to work at the gas station that had finally hired her. It was a huge deal since it was the first time she'd ever been clean long enough to work.
The doctor I was supposed to be seeing via Lyla's recommendation was on the third floor in the corner office. The waiting area was full of women with round bellies, or others with stroller and carseats with the red faced screaming bundles. I fought back the urge to make a face at the sight of a baby as I took a seat across from a middle aged woman with a beach ball sized stomach.
I couldn't help but stare at how miserable she looked. Unkempt was a way to describe her, and I knew I was being unfair since there was another woman on the opposite side that was fully done up in make up and dressy maternity wear. Pregnancy happened to everyone. I zoned out pretending to watch the TV until minutes later when a nurse stepped out calling my name loudly.
"Coming." I stood up quickly following her into the back where she gave me a friendly smile.
"I'm just going to ask you a few basics as I get your weight, blood pressure, that sort of stuff." She explained going through the motions with me.
It didn't take long before she leading me into my room handing me a paper gown to slip on. "He'll be in in a few minutes."
I nodded doing as instructed before sliding onto the table feeling cold and uncomfortable. I didn't belong here. I didn't even want to be here. I tucked my bottom lip keeping it still from trembling as I waited in the cool silence. I wished suddenly that I'd asked Wendy to come with me, or Lyla, anyone since Juice had bailed. If I ever needed a big sister it was now. I knew deep down it was probably club related that Juice had bailed but still, he could have text.
The door pushed open suddenly making me sit up straighter, pulling my gown into place. "Hello Ms. Jennings." Dr. Gabowski greeted me with a kind smile as he came into the room. "How are we feeling?"
"Horrible." I answered honestly with such a sad voice that I saw him smile a little as he washed his hands in the small sink in the corner of the room.
"I saw that you complained of constant nausea along with a few other things. We'll get to all of that soon." He promised coming over to give me a gentle push down while he went about his exam with me staring at the wall.
He waited until it was over to speak again. "How long have you been having the spotting?"
I swallowed down the lump of emotions that was trying to escape. "A couple of weeks. I thought it was normal so I didn't make a big deal out of it."
"Judging by your exam, and the information you gave us, you're around 16 weeks. We'll do an ultrasound to confirm of course, but at this point we wouldn't really expect to see anything like that. Why don't you tell me what you do on a daily basis?"
I went over the motions of my day in a soft voice knowing that there was something was with it from the way he was frowning at me while I talked. "I can't not do any of this." I made sure to add in at the end.
"I think you should try." Dr. Gabowski told me coming over to draw blood to send off to the labs for more of the tests that I'd missed out on doing. "You waited late to seek prenatal care, you haven't been taking care of yourself. You're already doing poorly, I would recommend you lessening the load some. Maybe take an extra day off from work."
That was the last thing I wanted to hear. I held back my frustration while he pressed a band aid onto my arm. "Give us a bit to run this, then I'll be able to go over everything else with you. Wait in here if you would."
What am I supposed to say to that? I thought to myself as he left the room leaving me to redress myself in peace.
I counted the stripes on the wallpaper until he came back in much later. "Ms. Jennings, I need you to remember to take care of yourself. Not just for you, but for the baby you're carrying. Your prior habits shouldn't be a risk but I am concerned about several other things. You're dehydrated, blood sugar is low, and you're spotting." He said with great concern.
I nodded already expecting bad news of some sort today. "Is anyone helping you?" Dr. Gabowski asked kindly.
Shaking my head, I felt like a small child. "No, just me. I do everything for myself."
"I'm going to write a few things down for you. Just follow the guidelines okay?"
By the time I'd left I'd been instructed to eat more, drink, rest more, and was near tears at the realization that it was my own fault I was in the situation alone. I shivered despite the blazing California heat as I walked towards the parlor despite being advised to take it easy. I didn't have another option today. My stomach flip flopped and I held back a groan at the feeling. Every time I felt the jellybean inside of me it was harder to keep myself emotionally unattached.
I walked until I neared the parlor and let myself in through the back door feeling disgusting before I even had to start working in the greasy kitchen. My hair was sweat dampened and curling around my face, my baggy t shirt was wet in the back with sweat, and any make up I'd had on was gone. I grabbed a paper towel wetting it then swiping it over my face with a sigh.
"Hey, I thought I saw you come in." Carla said sweetly coming through the kitchen with her order pad in hand. "Aw, you look great today."
My eyes narrowed into a glare at the blonde in front of me giving me a too sweet smile back. "What do you want?"
"Geez, I won't give you any compliments anymore. I do like the outfit too just so you know." She threw in. "A guy out front said he wanted to see the manager."
Frowning, I tried to put myself back together as much as I could despite knowing it was a total loss. I followed her back out front "Where guy?"
"Guy in the suit in the corner."
He had dark hair, a business suit, and a gift bag. I approached him cautiously. "Hi, I'm Lindsey Jennings. One of the girls said you wanted to talk to me?"
The man in question looked up; eyes roving over my face then body. "I'm Mr. Brooks." he held out his hand in invitation. "I'm looking to start up a small business, supply places like this with my product."
Something was familiar about him. He was Asian, well dressed, and polite, so that could have been the description of a number of my past clients at Diosa. Maybe that was it. I nodded sitting down across from him to dive into work today. I was just being too paranoid.
SOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOASOA
Juice's POV
My body ached with exhaustion as I waved bye to the rest of the guys walking towards my bike. It'd been a long day for all of us. We'd went to every listed residence of the 7 Chinese Triad members that had been released and yielded absolutely nothing. The houses were dusty and empty, no clues whatsoever as to where the missing one had went.
My hacker skills were only so much without a solid hit to run off of. I couldn't produce anymore information without even a tiny piece to go on. I pulled the Velcro back on the wrist of my gloves adjusting it before slipping my phone out of my pocket.
A ton of missed calls and texts were on my registered cell from Lindsey. I'd been forced to bail for the Chinese thing after a mysterious package of dead birds showed up at Gemma's. She'd called screaming her head off at the crack of dawn, and we'd been steady ever since. I hit the call button before I noticed the time, then shrugged to myself.
"Hello?" Lindsey's thick voice answered telling me she'd either been asleep or was close to it.
"Hey baby." It slipped off of my tongue before I could stop it. "I wanted to see how it went today. You in bed already?"
There was a rustling sound of blankets as she moved around. "Mmm. I was watching a movie."
"Wanna meet me?" I asked with just a hint of nerves that she'd say no. I couldn't blame her.
"You can come to me. I'm in our room." Lindsey said sounding embarrassed. "111."
"On my way."
I stopped at a gas station on the way grabbing a few things before going across the street to the motel. This was where it'd all changed. I couldn't help but feel nostalgic as I swiped a key from Greaseball, and walked down the grungy carpeted hallway to our room. I didn't knock before I slid the key into the slot letting myself into the room.
Lindsey was laying in the bed with her dark hair fanned out around her as she was lay there halfway asleep again. "You ditched me."
"I didn't mean to." I apologized tossing the plastic bag down onto the bed beside her before toeing off my boots. I wasn't planning on staying but it seemed too uptight to sit in the chair in the corner and talk to her about something as intimate as this.
"I called you a million times. I was alone." she accused but was opening up the grocery sack and plundering through it. She pulled out the Sprite I'd bought for her along with a few snacks that she was already ripping open.
"I know, I'm sorry okay? Club stuff had to be dealt with first." I dropped down beside her, but not close to be touching her. Wasn't quite ready for that no matter how tempting it was, especially now that we were alone, in a bed.
Lindsey stuffed a peanut butter cracker in her mouth whole chewing noisily before washing it down with the sprite. "You promised."
I nodded drawing my knees up on top of the covers. "I know, it happens though. I'm not arguing, won't do it. I want to know how it went."
"Its fine." She said in a tone that made me want to shake sense into her. "Dr. Gabowski said it should be here in 5 months. I'm due around the holidays. I have to schedule an ultrasound in a couple of weeks. The heartbeat was strong."
"16 weeks huh?" I reached over taking one of the Cheetos I'd bought and popping it into my mouth. I was biting back the huge grin that wanted to spread just talking about this baby. My baby.
"Yes." Lindsey said sourly sipping on her drink. "And he gave me a bunch of prescriptions for shit I don't want or need."
I studied her, wondering why she was so against this. Sure, she was trying a little bit more than she had been but still. "Give 'em to me, I'll get them filled and bring them by the parlor with my laptop tomorrow."
"Your debit cards in my purse." she told me with a dark look pushing the chips away to lay down again after her little junk food binge. It'd been my sure way of getting her to talk easily; bringing her the food she loved that I hated.
She glanced over at me again when I slid down partways. "Nothings happening." she warned me.
"I wasn't-I guess I deserve that don't I?" I sighed remembering the clubhouse incident that had been one of the blowjobs of my entire life. "It wasn't supposed to go down like that."
"You were horrible to me. And you keep looking at me and.." she raised an eyebrow. "You never just want to talk."
I lifted my arm up inviting her to curl up next to me. "I know Linds, I know. I'm sorry about it. I was a dick." She appraised the invite before cautiously sliding over to rest her head on my lap, hands curling around my thigh through my jeans.
"We can't have sex anyways." Lindsey whispered. "I'm.. having an issue but they think it'll be okay."
I pushed her hair back stroking it with gentle fingers. "I thought you said everything looked good with the baby."
"It does. But not with me. You didn't ask about me." She was doing a good job of pouting tonight I thought to myself but didn't say to her.
"I'm trying Lindsey. I'm really trying to be nice, and check up on you. I just gotta figure out how. I didn't know I had to ask for specifics." I rubbed her forearm in a circle.
"I'm trying to." Lindsey said into my leg. "But no sex. Not until I know you'll be nice about it. You used to treat me good before."
She'd been thinking on that night, I realized. It'd hurt her more than I'd given credit. Now she was half asleep and pouring her heart out with her emotions showing through plain and clear. "What's going on with you?"
"I'm dehydrated. I've drank a hundred bottles of water today. Blood sugar, iron, and I'm…. I'm bleeding some." She lifted her head up meeting my eyes. " I hate being an incubator for nine months."
I ran my thumb down her skin scratching it without meaning to with the callous on my skin. "I know you don't like it but maybe you'll change your mind once the baby's here. I want him. I've always wanted a family."
"I just don't think I can do it. I have no idea how to change a diaper or sterilize bottles." Lindsey admitted, her body going limp as she relaxed.
"I do. You act like I'm going to duck and run. I can help you with him you know. Plus Wendy can coach you through. And I have Gemma." I reminded her thinking of Gemma's earlier offer to help me start getting ready for this little guy. Or girl, I thought to myself but knew I had my own hopes of the sex. "You'll learn, it doesn't have to be awful."
Her eyes were closed but she was awake just barely listening to me talk. "I love kids. I wanted to have at least four but one's okay too. I was waiting for an old lady before I seriously tried for any. It never happened before now so I didn't think it really would."
"Plus, you know you have this maternal thing going on and you don't even realize it. You took care of me so many times and you fuss over me. I think you can do this." Her breathing was getting more even now. "And I really really think this is good. A baby could kinda solidify things with us. I was thinking that I could next time. If you don't mind." I paused looking down at her.
She was asleep finally. "And I know you'll love him." I whispered stroking her hair again making the decision to let her sleep this way if she wanted to. I'd sit up all night if she was calm and at peace.
