Chewy and Spiny sat on the ground watching their master pace across the sidewalk in front of Swirl, growling, "It's always secrets and lies with those demons! Secrets and LIES!" He twirled a bit of hair around his finger, "They're up to something they don't want Tobi to know about? Oh, the nerve! Tobi will find out about it, oh yeah! Because Tobi may be random, but he isn't dumb!"
In an hour, Tobi had prepared a whole roasted pig glazed in a thick, honey-sauce with an apple stuck in its mouth. It sat, like a holy idol, on the table in Swirl's party room in front of Tobi's prime witness.
"Wow…" Hun panted, eyes wide at the succulent animal, "Is this all for me?" Tobi giggled at the hell-dog's reaction,
"Mm-hm! All you have to do…" He seized a lamp from a nearby counter and shined its light directly into Hun's face, a smirk on his face, "Is talk."
"Sure!" Hun wiped the gathering drool from his mouth before he began, "My hobbies include chasing squirrels, fishing, chasing my tail: I think I've figured out how to finally get it—"
"No!" Tobi hissed, "Talk about Tobi's friends!" Hun blinked in confusion, but another look at the roasted pig made him begin,
"Well, there's Kisame… Itachi… Kakuzu…"
"No!" Tobi brought over a mirror so Tobi could see himself, growling, "Confess…"
"Confess what?" Hun whimpered. Really, all of this for a meal? "Tell me what you want me to say and I'll say it!" Tobi screamed, punching his fist into the mirror: oblivious to the blood and cuts he received from the action,
"Confess that Tobi's friends are lying to him and deceiving him because they hate his parties and they don't want to be around Tobi anymore!" Hun gulped before reciting, exactly as he had been told,
"Your friends are lying to you because they hate your parties and don't want to be around you anymore?"
"Ah-HAH!" Tobi exclaimed in triumph but he soon meeped, "Uh-oh.", as he realized his mistake.
Joy-demons were a unique species of demon. Their main purpose in life was to bring joy to those around them, making themselves happier in return.
But they were incredibly susceptible to mood-swings and the influence of bad atmospheres. When this would happen, a joy-demon's persona, appearance, their whole sense of being could change in an instant.
Tobi groaned, clutching at his stomach in pain as he fell to the ground. "No…" He sobbed, his voice getting deeper and more solemn as his nails grew out, his hair grew down to his waist, and finally, his eyes went from wide and brown to narrow and red.
No longer was Tobi there in the bakery, but his depressed state that his parents had dubbed Madara. "My friends don't like my parties and they don't want to be around me anymore…"
"Um…" Hun blinked, not really knowing what had just happened, "Can I eat now?" Madara frowned before taking the platter that held the roasted pig and set it on a bench outside, telling Hun,
"Help yourself…" Before he slammed the door on the small hell-dog's face.
Inside of Swirl, Madara's eyes were manic as he looked around the table he had set and looked around at his guests, "Thank you all so much for coming! Me and CHEWY," In this state, Madara had a bit of trouble controlling his voice and body-motions, swinging his head at random moments, "Appreciate IT! So much…"
The guests actually turned out to be a sack of flour, a dust-bunny, a pile of rocks, and a bucket of turnips. Madara's eyes twitched as the room was silent, Chewy crawling off of his chair and Spiny biting her tail. Madara cleared his throat before throwing his voice over to the turnip bucket, "Could I have some more punch?" He nodded, "Of course Turnip-san!" Madara rushed off and got the bucket a glass, twitching as he set it down.
He moved over to the pile of rocks, "This sure is a swell party Maddy! You outdone yourself!" Madara smiled, "Thanks Rocky! You're a real knock-out!"
"I am having a sublime time as well." He had the dust-bunny speak before laughing, "I'm glad Lady Lintel!"
"Like, whose leg do you have to hump to get a slice of cake around here?" He moved the sack of flour around before laughing, "Hold your horses Lindsey Flourhan!", and giving the sack a plate of cake.
"I'm just glad none of them other demons are here!" 'Rocky' stated, Madara chuckling, "Oh, come now! They aren't SO bad… Hee hEe HeE…" He gritted his teeth through his giggles, eyes dilating as he sunk further into his delusion. "Not so bad?" 'Rocky' huffed, "That bunch of losers?"
"And that's putting things nicely," Lady Lintel purred, "After the way they've treated you!" Madara hummed, wondering aloud,
"They were pretty rude…"
"Like, awful!" Lindsey Flourhan slammed her corner against the table, Turnip-san agreeing,
"You should never speak with them again!" Madara nodded, looking around with red, manic, sparkling eyes,
"You know what? Why should I? I don't think that they should come to my parties anymore either!" The 'guests' all whooped and cheered as Madara nodded to himself and his awesome decision.
There was a knock at the door, Madara blinking, "Who's that? Who? WHO? Who~!" The door opened, Kisame walking in and calling out,
"Hey Tobi, sorry about that mess earlier: me and the others had to get to Kakuzu's barn to help with that construction."
Madara just blinked at him.
"Yeah…" Kisame gulped, feeling the atmosphere becoming creepily intense with every second. "So, could you come with me to Goldleaf Farms real quick? I have something you need to—"
"CHEWY~!" Madara cried out, even though the lizard was near the other side of the room, "You got a stripper? How cute~!"
"Stripper?" Kisame blinked, gulping again as Madara sidled up to him: trailing fingers up and down his side,
"Oh, you a big, strong, blue one, aren't you?" Madara looked at the shark-demon's pants before smirking, "Time to take 'em off big boy!" When he felt the other try and pull at his pants, he pulled away.
"I NEED AN ADULT!" Kisame shouted, breaking from Madara's grasp and speeding out the door. To hell with this, someone else could come get Tobi: he was acting so weird! But Madara growled before charging after the shark-demon and jumping on his back, insisting,
"Come on, I'm pretty!"
"Tobi, get off!" Kisame begged, still rushing towards Goldleaf Farms.
"Why don't you LOVE me?" Madara mock-sobbed, wrapping his arms and legs around Kisame's chest tighter: ensuring his grip.
"I have NO idea what's going on right now~!" Kisame groaned. Luckily, even with Tobi molesting him, he soon made it to Goldleaf Farms and tried to open the door, "Help me!"
"Surprise..!"
"What the hell is going on here?" Itachi dead-panned as he saw his cousin nomming all over Kisame's neck. But Madara looked around before jumping up and shouting,
"Look at you! I, the pretty-pretty princess of Cupcake-land, should be asking you," Everyone in the group shrunk back as Madara smiled, eyes twitching, at them, "What the HELL is going on here?"
"We're throwing you a party?" Zetsu meeped, slightly scared. He had never seen Tobi act like this before. Madara gave a forceful laugh,
"Oh, hah, hah, HAH! I see what this is!" He turned and saw all the decorations and food, "A 'Get the fuck out Tobi' party? Well guess what bitches? I AIN'T LEAVING!" He whipped his head around and his eyes landed on the orange cake that had been made. "Ahh, I'm going to fuck up your cake!" The demon squished his hands into the cake before he rolled around in it. Then, as a final blow, he rubbed his butt into it laughing, "How do you like them apples?"
"I am so confused right now…" Ivan frowned, Kisame wiping his neck and gritting out,
"How do you think I feel?" But after seeing their friend mutter to himself, scream sporadically, and try and make a cake-angel, Hidan walked over and said,
"Tobi… Calm down." Madara only meeped, sitting on his knees, "Now, why do you think this is a party for you to leave?"
"Why?" Madara growled, then he thought, "Why..? Sigh… LIE!" He jumped up and pointed at the members of the group, "This cake is a lie! You all and this… party! When you're all full of secrets! And LIES!"
"Tobi…" Zetsu gently spoke, padding over, "We only kept things from you because we wanted this party, your party to be special…"
"Special for me to leave…" Madara sneered. Finally, Itachi stated,
"If this was a going away party, then why on earth would we have this?" Madara turned just as Itachi, Alfred, Deidara, and Naruto tugged a sheet off of a large mass. Madara's red eyes went wide as he saw a life-sized, chocolate-statue version of Tobi with a white chocolate plaque that read:
'Happy Birthday Tobi'
Madara bit his lip, looking at the presents on the table… the streamers… the balloons… the statue…
"Oh." He said.
There was a flash of orange light and when it abated, Tobi grabbed all of his friends into a great big, group hug. "Tobi can't believe he forgot his own birthday! Huggles!"
Everyone gave a huge sigh of relief, especially when Tobi let them go. The joy-demon pouted when he looked at his bottom, "Anyone want ass-frosting?"
Kakuzu, Zetsu, Sasori, and Ivan all turned red, coughing and clearing their throats until Zetsu offered, "Maybe you should just open your presents or get something to drink." Tobi nodded but he still felt a bit sad.
"Tobi's sorry for acting so paranoid today…"
"It's alright," Itachi offered, "It happens to the best of us." Everyone agreed until Alfred said,
"Alright, enough chatter! Dance-time!" Sasuke turned the music-system on and the party was officially on: everyone coming to the main area to dance. Even Chewy Spiny managed to crawl their way from the bakery to the barn.
Oh, it just goes to show all of us that we shouldn't allow ourselves to become so swamped in work that it turns us into psychopathic weirdoes.
Right?
That's the lesson, right?
"Who knows." Itachi muttered, "Does it really matter?"
No, I… Guess not.
A/N:
Thanks for reading! Please review!
-Tyranno's girl.
