Chapter 51: Self Esteem


A few days passed after the retaking of Riverbasin, and a lot of soldiers recovered from their wounds. Katie took a bit longer than some of them, which was hardly surprising to Lydia, once she learned what had been wrong with her friend.

"She didn't lose much blood at all." the doctor had told her, "That wasn't the issue. The bruises on her skin were pretty serious, but that wasn't the main problem either. In fact, I'd say she had two major problems. The first was that when the curse began crushing her into the ground, several of her bones broke, including both legs, three ribs, her pelvic bone and one arm. She's just lucky her skull stayed in one piece. The bone mending wasn't easy, but her potions sped that along. She shouldn't be in any danger of breaking them again in the near future. In fact, her bones seem to be as strong as they were before."

"The other problem is a bit harder to explain..." the doctor had continued, once he'd finished answering specific questions about the first condition, "In all the time you've known Katie, has she always been this big?"

"Yes." Lydia had replied with a nod, "I don't think she's grown an inch or gained a pound since I first met her."

"She's a lot bigger than anybody else in the army." the doctor had remarked, "Not just in weight, you understand, but she's taller too, by several inches. Has she really been over seven feet, two inches tall since you first met her?"

"Yes. Yes, she has."

"I assume that's as uncommon in your homeland as it is in ours."

"What's your point?"

"I'm convinced that Katie is what we call a giantess. Not a true giantess, you understand, in the sense of a mythical creature several times the height of a man, but rather, a person born with an imbalance in their body, which causes them to grow faster, bigger and stronger than other people. Katie seems not to have been troubled by this imbalance. In fact, from what I can tell, she's embraced it. However, that might only make the matter worse, in the end."

"What do you mean?" Lydia asked, already starting to feel worried, but the doctor soon continued.

"Your friend has a very strong heart." the doctor said a moment later, "The heart pumps blood throughout the entire body, you understand. However, I'm afraid that as strong as your friend's heart is, it's not strong enough to take much more abuse. It's already having to work hard to pump blood to every point in her body, and the larger a person's body is, the harder their heart needs to work. The fact that she gets a lot of physical activity may have helped matters, but the crushing force that the curse placed on her taxed her heart severely. It took an operation and a special kind of spell to get everything back in working order, and even so, I don't expect her to live to see forty. I'm sorry, Lydia. I wish I could help your friend more."

Since that discussion, however, Katie had gotten back on her feet. She'd experienced a few aches and pains at first; especially in her joints, but those had faded quickly with some rest, exercise, a potion or two and a decent meal. Finally, she was right back up to full speed, though the doctor's words still remained in Lydia's thoughts, cemented in place like a disturbing monument. Lydia hadn't talked to Katie about the doctor's predictions, but then again, Katie seemed well aware of what was going on around her, and the doctor had probably told her himself.

All the same, Lydia wished that she could have talked to her friend about her concerns.


From that day on, Katie and her friends continued to travel south with the army for over a week, retaking settlements and cities alike as they went. However, it soon became obvious that Katie's presence was more and more needed as they traveled further. In most locations, there were more than two star-gem-empowered persons. Few of them were especially powerful, however, and none of them did the damage to Katie that that first warrior had been able to.

As it had turned out, the marauder woman had been named Gabriel, and her information had been incredibly helpful in preparing for the kinds of powers and weapons that the army faced in each location. Still, the powers of their enemies were, on average, greater than those that the army had access to, and many soldiers lost their lives as they traveled further south, so that by the time they arrived at the stronghold of the marauders, setting up camp around it, there were less than half as many men in that army as there had been on the first day that Katie had arrived in that world. It was a devastating loss of life, and for that reason above all others, Katie felt obligated to spend some time thinking about what might have caused people to start becoming marauders. She spent time with Captain Coorsman, asking him questions about the recent and not-so-recent history of the marauders, and after answering all of her questions, he'd remark that he was glad to see her taking an interest in such an important subject.

Finally, Katie had come to a realization, and when she shared it with the captain, he said that the same thought had occurred to him. Marauders hadn't been a regular fixture of the history of AFA; at least not to the degree that they were then. Oh, sure; every so often, a handful of badly-behaved people would get together and go on raids, but there'd never been that many at once, or in one place, and it had never been that hard to overcome them.

"One thing's for certain." Katie had remarked to the captain as she was leaving his tent one evening, after discussing battle plans together, "Once we know what caused this sudden increase in marauders, we'll need to do everything we can to prevent it from ever happening again, for the sake of all the people who've died in this war."


Of course, with every town and city they passed through, Katie checked with Lucia to see whether the gate was nearby, and every time, Lucia would say that it was further south. Still, Katie wasn't sure she would have taken the gate, even if they'd passed by it already. She'd begun to feel that she and her friends were involved with the people of that world, and leaving to let them deal with the marauders alone would have felt cold and heartless to her.

In the end, however, when they'd approached the final stronghold of the marauders, Katie was amazed by just how not-strong it looked.

The building had apparently been a temple or gathering hall of some kind before the marauders had taken up residence in it, and there was nothing strange about that, in itself. What was odd was that the temple was a relatively recent construction; only about fifty feet high, and right in the middle of the city of Greatwell. Mostly, when marauders chose a temple for their stronghold, they picked one of the older temples, which were in ruins outside the walls of any major city or town. The temple in Greatwell was smaller and less sturdy-looking and mazelike, to say nothing of how the whole city would need to have already been conquered before it could be held as a stronghold of any kind. Katie wondered, for a moment, if it was more of a trophy than a stronghold, but in that case, she would have expected either desperation or fury from the remaining marauders inside, and they didn't seem to be adopting either pattern of behavior. In fact, just a moment later, a voice seemed to come from the sky itself, and everyone in the army heard it, though it wasn't a shout.

"I don't have a great many forces here, but if I were you, I'd leave now. If I destroy you all, I'll still win in the end, and it's very dangerous for you to all be in roughly the same place. You have five minutes to scatter, and then maybe some of you will survive."

Some members of the army started to look a bit worried, but to Katie, that announcement only meant that they were dealing with a very powerful mage or star gem user; possibly more than one, and in that case, there was no guarantee what might happen. He might turn out to be as powerful as Glenmoril or Ancano, in which case he probably could actually destroy their whole army with just a little effort. Magic was very unpredictable much of the time, and there was no telling just what it might do until it was seen in action at least once.

They didn't have enough time to hold a real conference, however. Instead, the captain made a command decision quickly, ordering ten knights to circle around each door of the temple, and they, in turn, were to hold most of their forces back, while the strongest knight in each group charged the door to try to break it open. Lydia just looked up at Katie questioningly when the knights took off. Katie, however, didn't seem any more hopeful than her that the plan would work. Instead, she handed Lydia a blue, glowing potion and glanced back at her in concern.

"Drink that. It'll give you protection against magical element attacks for the next six hours; not total protection, but enough to withstand some powerful attacks and suffer very little harm from them. Then, keep your eyes on the temple. If you see an element attack start to come out of it, intercept it with your levitation ring. Hopefully, we'll be fast enough if we both work at this together."

For a moment, Lydia wasn't sure what to expect, but sure enough, in just a moment, there was a sound like many small explosions going off, and a sizzling noise, just as the knights collided with the doors. At last, it became clear what had happened to them. Each of the knights that had been sent to attack the temple had become a charred pile of ash, along with their horses and most of their clothes. Only their armor remained, and it was scorching hot and warped. Katie could only see the remains of one of the knights from where she was, of course, but it didn't take much work to suppose that the same might have happened to the others.

In just a few moments, Gergio came by, looking concerned, and spoke to Katie directly.

"I have a plan of my own for how to deal with this." the dragonborn remarked, looking up firmly into the face of his ally, "Do you have one?"

"I think the army is about to fall under attack." Katie explained a moment later, "Lydia and I will try to protect them, but it would sure make things simpler if you could get into the temple somehow, without getting any more people killed."

"I can open the doors without touching them." Gergio just replied, "That's not difficult. I just hope it's only the doors that are lethal. If the entire building is rigged like that, then even if I could get through the door, nobody would be able to use it without dying."

Katie just nodded, as Gergio sprinted off for the main door, where the nine other knights still stood in formation, waiting for further orders. In a moment, she'd risen slightly into the air, and Lydia followed suit. There was no time to brief Captain Coorsman on any of their plans. The voice was starting to come from the skies again.

"Oh, well. I did give you a chance."

At once, something began to happen to the temple. Most temples had windows, less than six feet from the ground, which were shaped into images of various things or concepts significant to the religion, so that anyone, just by looking at them, could get some idea of what was most important. However, it seemed that when the marauders had taken over the temple, they'd smashed all the windows, scattering the glass outside and exposing the indoors to the open air. All that was left of the windows that had once been there were sharp spikes of metal, rising up in the middle of each window, an immediately after the echoing voice had spoken a second time, a humming sound began to emerge from each of them. Soon, glowing lights appeared just above each metal rod in each of the windows, and Katie had to rush to make her move.

At once, Katie had activated her power and zipped through the air, headed for the first of the humming rods. In a flash, she'd grabbed the rod and pulled it right out of the window. She could feel a powerful electric shock traveling through her body as she did so, but her power was protecting her from it for the most part, and she moved on to the next window, yanking out another rod. She seized one rod after another, removing them from their places in the window, and at last, she reached the spot where Lydia was. Lydia had managed to bend two rods, and was holding onto a third, when the real attack came. All at once, bolts of electricity filled each and every window in the place, emerging from the final rod, which Katie and Lydia hadn't dealt with yet, and shooting out past them, towards the assembled troops.

Of course, everyone tried to get out of the way, but there just wasn't enough time. Even in the world of magic, lightning was known for being very hard to dodge, and the lightning attack tore through over half a dozen knights and their horses. as Lydia and Katie watched in horror.

Quickly, Katie proceeded to tear the remaining metal rods up, but it was too late for the poor souls who'd been caught in that first attack, and from the sounds of it, that was only the beginning. Gergio still had his part to play. In a moment, he'd opened his mouth, and unleashed his shout at the front door.

"Fus-Ro-Dah!"

Quickly, Katie and Lydia flew around to Gergio's location, and were just in time to witness the destruction, as the front doors of the temple caved in under the force of the dragon shout, splitting into a hundred pieces on the way to the floor beyond. For just a moment, Katie and her allies paused on the doorstep of that building, and it was just as well that they did, because soon, a piercing, high-pitched whine began to come from the temple. It was as loud as an earthquake, and as shattering as a blow from a massive, steel hammer, and although Katie tried to think of some way to fight back against it, it was so distracting, that it was almost impossible to think straight as long as the noise continued.

However, eventually, she did start to focus again, and realized that she, at least, had only one way to fight back, even though it would undoubtedly put everyone nearby in danger.

With her powers still activated, Katie spread her arms as far apart as she could, then balling her hands up into fists, she slammeed them together with all her strength.

Immediately, Katie began to wish that she'd held back just a little. The whole area shook when she did that, and powerful vibrations began traveling through the air in all directions, sweeping into the temple, and over the ranks of the soldiers who were still gathered behind her. A huge cloud of dust covered Katie as soon as the vibrations began, and she couldn't see any of what was going on outside of it, but she could hear the panicked shouts of men and women; probably members of the AFA army, traveling swiftly away from her position; apparently retreating from the storm she'd kicked up with her magic-empowered muscles. Still, she had no idea what was going on in the temple itself, or who'd been responsible for that first attack. She didn't even know who or what had been screeching up to a few moments before. Still, if nothing else, there was one small comfort; that the high-pitched noise had, for the moment, stopped.

At last, the dirt and dust started to settle, and Katie could once again see the entrance to the temple. Gergio was standing very close to it, prodding the door frame with a wooden stake, and apparently confirming that it was safe to touch it. The moment that she saw that, Katie passed through the open doors and landed on the floor of the temple, with Lydia and Gergio following close behind. Again, she was surprised by just how normal the place looked. There was a raised platform at the far end of the temple, with chairs and a stand for giving speeches, and in the middle of the temple was a magical-looking basin; probably used for some kind of important ritual. Large sections of the floor were marble with red throw rugs, as though intended to be used, either for standing room or for bowing, and about half of the place was filled with long benches or pews made of polished wood of a deep red color, and carved into images resembling circles, triangles and winged shapes. Finally, perched up on the wall on the far end of the temple, there was a mural with the images of a head, a pair of lips, and a human hand. However, Katie didn't have time to wonder what those symbols meant, because there was one odd thing about the temple; its occupants.

The chairs on the raised platform weren't all occupied, but it was clear that they'd been meant to be. They were five chairs in all, and each was carved with a different symbol into it, or at least, each of the first two, and the fourth were carved that way. The fifth chair, and the one in the center were occupied, so it was hard to tell just how they were carved, but there were two other figures in the room, aside from the ones who were seated. Four people were on that raised platform, and only the one in the center was smiling.

However, the moment that Katie laid eyes on the figure who was seated in the central chair on that raised platform, she saw someone who was less like a marauder, and more like Captain Coorsman; at least in intelligence. At once, she'd begun to get the impression of a man who was under no false impressions at all; someone who was truly pulling the strings of whatever was going on there. All the others looked as though they'd really bought into the marauder mentality, but not him. His expression was self-satisfied and smug, but not niave.

Aside from the one in the central chair, all the rest of them looked a little dazed as well; especially the other young man who was sitting down. They all had black hair, except for their leader, whose hair was a sort of brown color with silver along the edges, and the one in the fifth chair was dark-skinned as well, looking a lot like a redguard or some race like them, except not as large in build. Katie got the distinct impression that most, if not all of the people in that room were magic-users of one type or another. Still, when she spoke, it was only the leader who seemed to be ignoring her.

"I thought this was supposed to be the stronghold of the marauders. You've got a trick or two, but this doesn't seem to be a stronghold of any sort. There's no troops or weapons."

That, however, was when the leader's eyes became fixed on her for the first time, and soon, he'd begun to speak.

"Of course, strongholds need to be defended by a powerful force, and this one definitely is. However, there's more to a stronghold than troops, weapons or fortifications. Just as Father Ganry always said, this building is the stronghold of our people, and it always will be, until our dying day. You see, even if we have no weapons, no supplies and no defenses, what really matters to us will still be protected here. This is where it all began, you see, when I was just a boy. In fact, when all of us were just children."

Katie didn't know much about the history of Greatwell, or what had happened to it when that man had been a child, but she could hardly be blamed for that. In spite of all the questions she'd asked about the history of the marauders, the fact was that very little news had been coming out of Greatwell to reach the outside world, so she couldn't possibly have understood what the leader of the Marauders was talking about.

"Father Ganry began his work here." the man continued, "Reminding us all of how wonderful and important we were, and teaching us about the importance of self-esteem and believing in ourselves. Of course, believing in yourself means refusing to believe it when others tell you otherwise. That's just natural sense. He agreed with us about that, as any sensible man would, but I don't think he quite understood the implications of his teachings. Before long, all the functions of this temple stressed our involvement and our great potential and accomplishments. Of course, all the holy books still say the same things they always did, but that doesn't mean we have to fixate on them. We learned self-confidence and indomitable free will, and we learned it well, right here. It's magnificent."

However, Katie was already starting to see what had gone wrong with those people, and in that place. Soon, she asked another question.

"Where's Father Ganry now?"

"He has a room downstairs, though I'm afraid he's been trying to distance himself from most of our efforts. I don't think he ever fully agreed with the total rejection of the old ways. He should have, though. It only follows logically from what he taught us."

"Yes..." Katie admitted a moment later, meaning every word of it, "I think you're right about that. A total embracing of oneself will certainly involve discarding everything of value; especially logic. However, that doesn't mean logic isn't worth having. Much the reverse. What it means is that you should think highly of something other than just yourselves. You're just going to destroy everything if you don't."

"A lot of people thought the way you did, when I was young," the leader of the marauders said, "They said, 'Marcus, you should give up on this foolishness about self-esteem and individualism. It's just going to get you in trouble.' Well, now time has passed, and all of them are gone. The young of this town believed the very same message that I did, and I know that's why they've been following our methods. That's why they became marauders."

"Like you?"

For a moment, Marcus looked a bit puzzled by the question, but finally, he said "No. None of them are quite like me. You see, they have the freedom to live like true marauders; doing whatever they please and rejecting all reasoning that tells them not to, but they never would have survived without someone to think things out for them. I needed to keep my head, and champion them in their battles. They turned to me for spiritual guidance, when Father Ganry said he didn't want anything to do with war, because I could understand the reasoning of the AFA forces, even though I didn't agree with it. Not too many of our people can do that."

"I think your people are finished now." Katie replied, however, "We've taken back all the towns and settlements they took."

"Yes you have, in the short term," Marcus explained with a wicked grin, "but how many people were left in those towns and cities, and are they completely devoted to your cause? The preaching of self-regard has been heard in half the kingdom now. Do you think there won't be another war like this one in less than a generation, except with a dozen Greatwells instead of just one?"

"I think you're underestimating the cleverness of your citizens." Katie replied with a smile, "They've seen what happens when your kind of pride is allowed to rampage unchecked, and they'll never forget it, or let their children forget."

"You're right about one thing." Marcus said, finally getting up from his chair, and a moment later, the young man on the fifth chair followed suit, "No one will ever forget us. We hold the secret to a more fulfilled future, if only you would realize it. In any case, as long as there are people who believe as I do, in the exhaltation of the self, I will be there to teach them."

"Wrong again." Katie replied, however, "Your reign ends today."

At that point, the man gestured, and all three of his associates advanced towards Katie and her friends. Soon, the young, redguard man snapped his fingers, and a ripple seemed to travel through the whole building, and into the field outside, where the army had been advancing. The two other men began using their powers as well, a moment later. One raised one hand, and at once, the doors of the building were covered by purple barriers of some kind. It was a spell that Katie had seen before; being used by Glenmoril; a spell of closing. Then, the other man waved his hand, and Katie felt a sudden wave of exhaustion begin to sweep over her, even as all three men drew swords and moved in to attack.

Katie could barely even raise her arms to respond to attacks at first, and it looked as though Lydia and Gergio were suffering under the same spell. Worse yet, it seemed that the three wizards who'd accompanied Marcus were proficient fighters as well. Lydia was knocked quickly onto her back, and Gergio got a nasty cut along one hip within the first minute of the fight. Katie was cut in several places, before she managed to get one good punch into one of the men, knocking him clear through the air and into the far wall.

The other mages turned and looked at her for a moment, giving Gergio the chance to seize another man by the head, and slam his face into the dragonborn's knee. He was out like a light in seconds. Apparently, the screeching noise that they'd all heard from outside had come from that man. He seemed to have some magical ability to produce or silence loud noises, because as soon as he fell to the floor, Katie could hear her footsteps again. More importantly, their strength was starting to come back, and the remaining man was beginning to look worried. At last, however, he raised both hands, and Kate immediately found a large, purple barrier pulling her towards the middle of the room, and contracting rapidly. Gergio and Lydia also seemed to have been caught up in that barrier, which they were just beginning to see approaching them from the front. In seconds, it had contracted so much, that Katie couldn't even punch it effectively, and it had begun to press them together.

Gergio and Lydia were trying to break out with their swords, but it was doing absolutely nothing to repulse the magic, and Katie could see that something bad was about to happen.

"Sheath your swords, quick!" Katie exclaimed, and they both obeyed fast, but then it happened. The barrier that surrounded them contracted again, and Lydia, Katie and Gergio found themselves being squeezed all over and against each other with a pressure so intense, that it could only have been magic.

"I am going to squeeze the life out of you tricksters." the man with the "closing" magic said furiously, as he brought his hands further together, "You're all going to die right here and now."

Sure enough, the pressure was continuing to increase, and Katie gasped as the very air was being forced from her lungs by the pressure of the force barrier that surrounded her. That was the worst part. Even if she and her friends were able to survive the pressure; would they suffocate inside that field, she wondered, as Yukosa Glenmoril had in a field of her own creation?


Author's Notes; Katie and her friends are now in other worlds, which aren't present in Skyrim.

In reality, of course, there are many ways to choose wrong over right, and many motivations that one might use for doing so, but the inflation of one's own ego beyond the point of reason is perhaps one of the worst, because it's essentially pride under a different name, and I don't think any cause or motive can associate itself with pride, without being tarnished.

Once again, lots of magic spells in this group, that are no longer present in Skyrim; notably "lock," or "close," "drain stamina," "silence" and "sound," and as with Glenmoril, the one who uses "close" can actually close off an area in space from the rest of the world, even without there being anything there to close. Potentially, I'd say that makes him the most dangerous.