Dear Mr. Diary,

Since Edward thinks I need to do stupid stuff... I SHALL!! MUAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHA...Ha?
Yeah...

Emmett.


"Omg!!" I said.

"What now Emmett?" Edward-o asked, "And yes I know that you just put 'Edward-o' in my name after I said 'What now Emmett?'"

"Whoa!" I was like 'omg' well anyways, "I need more stupid ideas"

"Ok go drown yourself and die."

"Isn't that the point of drown?" I asked.

"Just do it!" He shouted.

"Ok commander!" I said.

---A La Push!

"Why are you here leech?" Jacob asked as I walked towards the cliff edge

"Well duh, last time I wanted to fly... This time I wanna drown!" I said cheerfully.

"Suicidal much?"

"Naw, Edward's giving me dumb ideas!" I said.

"Oh." Jacob, "well in that case! It was nice knowing you! Have a nice trip! See you next fall!" He stuck his leg out and I tripped, and fell.

"WEEE!!" I shouted. Then I hit the water.

Ok. I'm now at the bottom now... WAIT!! THIS WAS A SET UP! I CAN'T EVEN BREATHE! SO HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO DROWN!?

I came up to the top, "DAMN YOU SUPER VAMPIRE CAN'T DIE POWER!" I shouted.

Then Jacob was next to me, holding my hand "Omg! You're so brave Emmey-poo! Marry me!" He said, fluttering his eyelashes.

"Did you just imprint on me?" I asked.

"By golly good gosh! Of course I did silly!" He hugged my arm.

"DAMN YOU EDWARD!" I shouted.